words in movies
ROSS: Oh, great. Great. There was a projectile, uh, throwing up incident, but he started it.
MONICA: Yes! Carol and Susan's caterer had a mountain bike accident this weekend, and she's in a full body cast.
MONICA: They want me to do it, which is really cool, seeing as I've never catered before, and I really need the money, and this isn't a problem for you, is it?
ROSS: If you wanna call that a reason.
ROSS: Look, that has nothing to do with this, ok? She's my ex-wife. If she were marrying a guy, none of you'd expect me to be there.
JOEY: Hey, if she were marrying a guy, she'd be like the worst lesbian ever.
JOEY: It's like, you got so many lines to learn so fast, that sometimes you need a minute to remember your next one. So while you're thinkin' of it, you take this big pause where you look all intense, you know, like this.
JOEY: I'm afraid the situation is much worse than we expected. Your sister is suffering from a..subcranial hematoma. Perhaps we can discuss this over coffee.
CHANDLER: For a minute there I thought you were actually tryin' to smell something.
CHANDLER: That's great. All right, I gotta get to work, I got a big dinosaur bone to inspect.
CHANDLER: That's a little more relaxed than you want them to get.
PHOEBE: Yeah, it's just so strange. I mean, she probably woke up today and thought, "ok, I'll have some breakfast, and then I'll take a little walk, and then I'll have my massage." Little did she know God was thinking, "Ok, but that's it." Oh, but the weirdest thing was, ok, I was cleansing her aura when she died, and when the spirit left her body, I don't think it went very far.
[Everyone takes a step back from Phoebe]
MRS GREEN: Sweetie! So this is where you work? Oh, it's wonderful! Is it a living room? Is it a restaurant? Who can tell? But I guess that's the fun.
RACHEL: Yeah, well just be glad he's not playing a smaller instrument.
JOEY: They didn't fight a lot?
RACHEL: I just can't believe this is happening. I mean, when I was little, everybody's parents were getting divorced. I just figured as a grownup I wouldn't have to worry about this.
CHANDLER: You know, it's funny when my parents got divorced, they sent me to this shrink, and she told me that all kids have a tendency to blame themselves. But in your case it's actually kinda true.
MR A: Phoebe?
MR A: Oh, that's all right, although you did cut into my busy day of sitting.
MR A: Oh, no, please, I spent most of mid-morning trying to stand up. Now uh, what can I do for you, my dear?
MR A: You're saying, my wife is in you?
MR A: Well, I don't know what to tell you dear. The only thing I can think of is that she always used to say that before she died, she wanted to see everything.
MR A: Everything.
PHOEBE: Whoa, that's a lot of stuff.
MR A: Oh, wait, I remember, she also said she wanted to sleep with me one last time.
MR A: [to Joey] Worth a shot, huh?
RACHEL: No, that was his costume. See, he's actually an orthodontist, but he came as a regular dentist.
PHOEBE: [enters] Hey. What a day. I took her everywhere. The Museum of Modern Art, Rockefeller Center, Statue of Liberty.
PHOEBE: Yeah. I guess she hasn't seen everything yet. I'll be right back, she has to go to the bathroom again. [Takes Mrs. Green's chin in her hand and says, in Mrs. Adelman's voice] Oh, such a pretty face.
ROSS: No. Look, I told you I am not a part of this thing.
MONICA: All right, look, Ross. I realize that you have issues with Carol and Susan, and I feel for you, I do. But if you don't help me cook, I'm gonna take a bunch of those little hot dogs, and I'm gonna create a new appetizer called "pigs in Ross". All right, ball the melon.
MONICA: You're still gonna pay me, right? Or something a little less selfish.
[Wedding music starts, Phoebe noisily unwraps a piece of candy.]
[Monica pushes Ben down the aisle in a stroller. Susan is escorted by both her parents. Carol is escorted by Ross.]
JOEY: [to a wedding guest] How's that pig-in-the-blanket workin' out for you? [the guy nods] I wrapped those bad boys.
PHOEBE: I know it's kind of weird, but I mean, she was a big part of my life there, you know, and now I just feel kind of alone.
WOMAN: You know, I uh, I couldn't help but overhear what you just said, and I think it's time for you to forget about Rose, move on with your life...how 'bout we go get you a drink?
CHANDLER: [to an attractive woman] I shouldn't even bother coming up with a line, right? [The woman walks away]
MRS GREEN: Oh, am I! I just danced with a wonderfully large woman. And three other girls made eyes at me over the buffet. Oh, I'm not saying it's something I wanna pursue, but it's nice to know I have options.
SUSAN: You did a good thing today.
RACHEL: I had a wedding.
[Scene: Monicas childhood bedroom (which has been turned into a gym), Monica is lying on the treadmill as Phoebe enters.]
Phoebe: This used to be your room? (She nods Yes) Wow! You mustve been in really good shape as a kid.
Phoebe: No but, why does that have to be a bad thing. Just change what it means. Y'know? Go down there and prove your Mother wrong. Finish the job you were hired to do, and well call that pulling a Monica.
Phoebe: Well, who cares what your Mom thinks? So you pulled a Monica.
ROSS: Hey, hey, woah, you want some of this, huh? You want a piece of this, huh? I'm standin here, huh.
(They both continue on and Ross meows like a cat.)
Rachel: What if I clean your bathroom for a month?
(She closes the door and puts his tie into his mouth as a gag.)
Rachel: Foot rubs for a month!
Joey: Wow! Theres a lot I didnt know about vomit. (The duck comes to the door of the bathroom, quacking.) (To the duck) In a minute. (The duck goes back into the bathroom.)
(Chandler screams a little bit, then realises that he can spit out his gag. He does so with a Pouff!)
Joey: How about zero down and zero a month for a long, long time?
Joey: And a 50. (The salesman stops suddenly) Huh, these must be Chandlers pants.
Joey: You wanna see what I got? (He gets up to empty out his pockets) Okay? Ive got a baby Tootsie Roll, a movie stub, keys, a Kleenex, a rock, and an army man. Hey!
Rachel: Oh, I called them. And when they ask me what I saw, I can be very generous (Holds her hands far apart) or very (In a high pitched voice) stingy.
Phoebe: Youre right. Youre right, hes just embracing life. We could all stand to be a little more like Parker. You know what? I am like him! Im a sunny, positive person.
Monica: So if everyone liked it, and you liked it, that would make this a success. Which would make you
Phoebe: Umm, you might even say that she pulled a Monica. (They both look at her) (to Monica) She doesnt know we switched it. (Monica nods her head No.)
Mrs. Geller: (interrupting) A bitch?
Monica: (in a sexy voice) Hello, Chandler. (Phoebe has a huge smile on her face.)
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Phoebe is there as Monica enters carrying a huge stack of newspapers.]
Phoebe: Oh God, Korea is such a beautiful country.
(They all laugh and Joey joins them, not to be left out. When the laughing dies down, he has a depressed look on his face.)
Joanna: Rachel, could you come in here for a moment, please?
Joey: I wish. See, I guess another thing I probably shouldve told you about Ginger is that she kinda has a ah, artificial leg.
The Salesman: For 50 bucks, you can get one book! What will it be? A? B? C?
Rachel: Yeah, sure. Umm, they didnt have poppy seed bagels, so I (Enters Joannas office and sees her handcuffed to her chair wearing nothing but a slip) Oh my word!
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, the game is coming to a close.]
Mr. Treeger:: Cause youre a little princess! "Daddy, buy me a pizza. Daddy, buy me a candy factory. Daddy, make the cast of Cats sing Happy Birthday to me "
Rachel: Im sorry. I didntI dont come in here a lot.
Rachel: Ummm. Oh! Im sorry. (She grabs the box and offers him a piece.) Its a little old but
Joey: Im gonna go down there and teach that guy a lesson.
Rachel: What did you get her? (Joey opens up a rectangular black box and holds up a pen.)
Chandler: Oh yeah, gym member. I try to go four times a week, but Ive missed the last 1200 times.
Monica: (Picking up a card from Chandlers wallet.) My God! Is this a gym card?
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Phoebe is entering carry a large box, Monica is mopping the ceiling.]
Monica: Y'know they say a watched pot never beeps.
Joey: Have you heard about a little something called, Not Making Girls Cry.
Phoebe: No, I can handle it. No, Im a professional. (She starts to leave)
Phoebe: Oh no, it is forbidden! No-no, Mrs. Potter fires people for fooling around with clients. And its against my oath as a masseuse.
Rachel: Oh Pheebs, is that a new ankle bracelet?
(He starts to put his pants on, but Rachel manages to drag him to the chair. When they get to the chair, Chandler drops his pants and knocks the chair away. Rachel then backs him up and locks him to the top drawer of a filing cabinet.)
Monica: What a minute, what did he say?
The Salesman: So, what do you say, Joey? You get the whole set of encyclopedias for twelve hundred dollars, which works out to just 50 bucks a book!
Chandler: (He turns to Ross and Ross makes a Be strong sound.) I wanna quit the gym.
Chandler: Yes. (In a stronger voice) Yes!
Gym Employee: Okay, no problem. (To someone out of the picture) Could you come here for a second?
JOEY: Aw, man I'm sorry (starts rubbing Chandler's shoulder). This must be very tough for ya, huh (and starts comfroting him looking for a kiss).
(Ross is at a loss for words.)
Joey: Okay, relationship, boy this could take a while.
Chandler: Y'know, I forgot the combination to this about a year ago? I just carry it around. Do you have any Chap Stick?
Rachel: Ooh, I just wish we hadnt lost those four months, but if time was what you needed just to gain a little perspective...
Rachel: Well, why doesnt he practice with a girl?
Chandler: All right, I have to get that, but no-no. (answering phone) Hello? (listens) (happily) Hi! Yeah listen, I'm, I'm in need of a stripper and I was told that you do that. (listens) Let me ask you this, what, what do you do for the extra hundred? (listens) So would I, would I have to provide the grapes?
Chandler: Youre a genius!
Phoebe: No, I know! I-Im sorry, but the moment I touch him, I just wanna throw out my old oath and take a new, dirty one.
Mr. Treeger:: Ahh, forget it! Ill never be any good at this, my mom was right, Im just a big potato with arms, and legs, and a head.
Joey: Come on man, youre not a potato.
Ross: Watch. (he takes the laptop) Here, you ehm... You highlight the word you want to change. Go under Tools and the Thesaurus generates... 'gives'... 'gives' a whole list of choices. You can pick the word that sounds smartest.
Joey: Ah-ha-ha, you guys owe me big time. (He walks into the kitchen and does a little dance step on the way.)
Monica: Yes you did! You did like a little hop.
Joey: Hey-hey, hold on, this isnt some kind of like girly dance. All right, its like a sport, its manly!
Phoebe: Well, we don't n-n-n-n-need a fireman, we'd, we'd like a good mechanic. (hears the sound of approaching sirens) Oh my God, here they come! Well, we gotta get out of here!
Joey: All right, well maybe Im enjoying it a little bit. I mean Im getting pretty good at it.
[Scene: Healing Hands, Inc., Phoebe is giving Rick a massage.]
Phoebe: Ugh, okay, I have an enormous crush on you. But because youre a client, I cant ask you out, even though you give me yknow, the feeling.
(Suddenly, Phoebes boss, Mrs. Potter, and a client, Mr. Simon, enters.)
Monica: Wow! A lipper from Chipper.
Ross: All right, we have a tie. Luckily, I have prepared for such an event. (He opens up an envelope and holds up some note cards.) The Lightning Round!
(Theres a knock on the door and Chandler answers it.)
Phoebe: I just-I just started walking around not knowing what to do next, yknow? I-I started asking people on the street if they wanted massages. Then these policemen, thought I was a whore too. Its been a really bad day, whore wise.
Mr. Treeger:: Right. (Starts to leave) Hey, ahh, you wanna come? Marge has a girlfriend.
Mr. Treeger:: Thank you, listen, thanks a lot Tribbiani, (checks watch). Oh my God, look at the time, I gotta catch the bus to the ball.
Interviewer: Okay, well give a call if anything comes up.
[Scene: Central Perk, the gang's all there. Ross has a slip of paper that he throws on the ground tying to get Rachel's attention.]
Video:April Twelve, Eighteen hundred, Sixty-One (Monica lights Richard's cigar butt), 4:30 A.M. on Tuesday, the United States garrison at Fort Sumter was fired upon (knock on door) it is now under bombardment by....
(Chandler is talking to Monica and notices a beautiful woman.)
Ross: Oh, yeah, last week you had a wonderful, nutty, chocolatey kind of a cakey pie thing. (Rachel gives him a dirty look) Nothing, just, just, I'm fine.
Kathy: With a K.
Chandler: Hey, come on, give me a break, I'm out on a limb here.
Ross: No! And somehow, we ended up with a joint checking account.
Chandler: Uh Kathy, with K or a C?
Kathy: I'm sorry, you're right, I apologize, but I should tell you that I'm waiting for a date. (Joey enters) Oh, and there he is now.
Kathy: No, no, it's not like that. I, I work for a medical researcher.
ROSS: Wha--? Whoa, hey, I don't want my birthday to be the source of any kind of negative--there's gonna be a hoopla?
Ross: Yeah, he's a little sensitive right now, `cause he's so in love.
Joey: Well he actually saw you a little bit too.
Rachel: (entering, with a guy) Hi guys! This is Josh. Josh, these are my friends, and that's Ross.
Ross: Great, actually. I'm thinking tonight, maybe the night. Yeah, I mean ah, the kids are gonna play together and then when they're asleep, I'm thinking Amanda and I break open a bottle of wine, and do a little "playing" ourselves.
Phoebe: Yeah. Oh! It'll be like I have a wife in the fifties!
Rachel: Okay. (He starts to leave, and Rachel grabs him and gives him a passionate kiss.) I'll miss you.
[Scene: Central Perk, Ross is talking to Dr. Baldhara, a zookeeper.]
Ross: Well maybe he'll get to go soon, like on a class trip or something.
Rachel: I know, isn't he great? It's so nice to finally be in a fun relationship, y'know? There's nothing boring about him, and ah, I bet he's never set foot in a museum.
Monica: It's this dumb thing that Ross made up `cause he was trying to fool our parents. It's a way of giving the finger, without actually having to give it. I remember I cried the night you made it up, `cause it was the first time that I realized that I was actually cooler than my older brother.
Amanda: I appreciate this soo much, I've been trying to go out with this guy for like a month.
[Scene: A street, Chandler is buying a newspaper and notices Kathy running by.]
Chandler: No-no-no-no, no, its a good thing. Why must we dial so speedily anyway? Why must we rush through life? Why cant we savor the precious moments? (to one of Joeys sisters) Those are some huge breasts you have.
Chandler: I don't know. I can't--I just, I can't get her out of my head. Y'know? I mean, I'm a very bad person. I'm a very, very bad person. I'm a horrible person. (he waits for a reaction, when he doesn't get one) No you're not Chandler! We still love you Chandler!
Chandler: Y'know I had a big meal on Monday, y'know. So that's just gonna get me straight through the week.