words in movies
Rachel: All right, yknow what, come on, do we really have to watch this while we eat? (She makes a move for the remote.)
Joey: Imagine a protective porn bubble if you will, okay?
Phoebe: Ohh, Im getting too pregnant for this, lugging around a stupid massage table. Yknow, I have to find a job where I carrying a smaller table. (She goes over and stands in front of the TV.)
Chandler: Or a job where you dont have to carry a table.
Phoebe: You mean like a doctor?
Ross: Well I, thats the thing, I dont know! I mean, whenever I brought it up with her she said, (In a British accent.) "This is so fantastic! Why do we have to talk about the future? Lets just enjoy "
Monica: No! Yknow, the fantasy! Meet someone from a strange land, fall in madly love, and spend the rest of your lives together.
Ross: I am a good kisser.
Monica: Then you two can, can sneak into the cockpit, and things will start to heat up, and then a stewardess comes in (Ross looks at her.) Ive been watching too much porn.
(The heartbeat changes, and we hear a different one.)
Phoebe: Oh my God! Oh my God! Oh my God!! So I-I mean so in a few months Im going to have three full grown babies just walkin around inside me?! Oh! Oh! And its gonna be one of those log rides where they just come shooting out!
Phoebe: Oh well, okay, hey, yknow how when youre umm, youre walking down the street and you see three people in a row, and you say, "Oh, thats nice?"
Alice: Were gonna have a big family, Ive always wanted a big family!
Frank: Yeah, Ive been thinking ever since you said we were having triplets, the best thing for me to do is to drop out of college and get a job.
Frank: Yeah, yknow when we found out we were going to have a baby, yknow I figured yknow like I should yknow have like a careerand I love refrigerators!
Frank: No, its okay. Were-were gonna have three kids! And thats-thats a different kind of dream. Three kids and no money.
Ticket Agent: (On the P.A.) This is the boarding call for Flight 009.
Ross: Thats, thats, thats a big candy bar. (Shes holding one of those huge Toblerone bars.) I had the most amazing time with you.
Phoebe: Well, Frank has to quit college because his super fertile sister is having three babies! I need to make a lot of money really fast, and I had an idea that I want to talk to you (Points to Chandler) about, cause you work for a big company. Okay, insider trading, what information is there that you can give me.
Chandler: Whoa-whoa, wait a minute, did you say, you love her?
Chandler: Hi! Listen, can we watch cartoons on your television? We need a porn break. We spent the last two hours watching In & Out & In, Again.
Phoebe: (entering carrying a case) Ooh, good, youre hear! Okay.
Phoebe: Oh this, well Im glad you asked. (She opens the case and removes a knife and an soda can.) Now, dont you hate it when you have to cut a tin can with an ordinary steak knife? (She efficiently cuts it in half.) Ahh! Now, I know what youre thinking
Monica: Come on! Surprise her! Show up at her doorstep! Dont let her go without a fight!
Phoebe: Ooh-Ooh! I did it! I did it! I figured out a way to make money! Im gonna open up my own massage place and Franks gonna help me! And! We can work it around his schedule so he doesnt have to quit school!
Chandler: A place where no one will ever get out alive?
Phoebe: No! Think about it, its a taxi that people take when they need to relax, its
Monica: Okay, just stay there a couple more hours and if she doesnt show up by then, then just come on home.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's erm, Chandler and Joey's, later that same night. There is a knock on the door and Chandler answers it to reveal Emily standing behind it.]
Emily: I wish I could know if youd heard any of that. I suppose Ive either just told you I love you or given my neighbours a good laugh. Mrs. Newman if youre listening, bugger off this in none of your business. I suppose theres not much chance you did heard that, and theres the call waiting so, I should go. Oh well. (Answers the call waiting.) Hello.
Chandler: Yeah, thats kinda a relief.
Rachel: Honey, its going to be okay. Hes been incredibly supportive of me, and if he gets a little upset; thats what the meatball sub is for. (She gives Dina a sandwich wrapped in aluminum foil.)
Joey: Don't worry, Chandler, it's not a globe of the United States.
Joey: (concerned) Oh. Whats, whats going on? Is it mom? Is she sick? Is it dads heart? Is that a sandwich?
Joey: Is that a sandwich?!
Joey: Well obviously this is a mistake! You cant be pregnant! Because you have to have sex to get pregnant!
Phoebe: Well, I heard youre having a problem with one of the boys in your class. And so I thought I would just come down here and sit you both down, have a little talk and make it all okay. Now umm, the boys name is Stings son.
Phoebe: Him youre friends with. (Starts looking at the children trying to find Jack and a teacher notices her.)
Ben: Jack? I hate him! Hes a jerk.
Phoebe: I am one of Bens mothers. Im a lesbian. It was, it was difficult coming out to my parents.
Phoebe: Im sorry. Im sorry. I never got to be in a club. I-I didnt go to high school, but three of us would meet behind a dumpster to learn French. Bonjour.
[Scene: A Street, Chandler and Monica are walking down the sidewalk after his office holiday party.]
Monica: Yeah! I didnt know there would be dancing. That was a fun surprise!
[Scene: The Midfield Day School, its after school and Ben is taking a drink of water as Phoebe enters.]
Monica: I cant walk. Okay? Okay? These boots were a huge mistake!
Monica: Okay you were right! All right, I never should have bought them! Theyre killing me! One toe at a time!
(Joey enters dragging a guy.)
Phoebe: Oh no, I dont believe in Western medicine. No, if you just apply pressure to these points right here. (Shes pinching the bit of skin between her right thumb and forefinger with her left hand.) Then your hand starts to hurt and you still have a headache, so thanks. (Takes the pills.)
Chandler: Honey, I know youre in pain right now, but Im a little turned on.
Monica: Okay. Wait, just give me a second, I need to just get my boots off first. (She starts taking them off.) Ah Ooh Oohh Ohh Oh God Ohh Oh Ohh Ohhhh
Joey: Hey! You dont get a say in this!
Rachel: Oh, come on kids! A little help here!
Phoebe: Concert. Yeah. That does put us in quite a pickle. Because you see Im very busy before and after the concert, and hes obviously busy during.
Phoebe: The Police? Here? A reunion?! (She gets out her camera.)
Rachel: Like a little girl. I know. I know. I know. This is all my fault; I wanted him to open up. But God, I didnt know that I was gonna unleash this-this weepy, clingy, moist monster!
[Scene: The Street, Chandler is carrying Monica past a store window.]
Chandler: Oh Im sorry! Do you need a break?
Mike: All right, stop! You know, all Phoebe has done tonight is trying to get you to like her. And maybe that hasn't been clear all the time, but she did her best. And yeah... She's a little different than you are...
Rachel: Joey, just because theyre not getting married doesnt mean this is going to be a disaster. Maybe they have a plan!
Monica: Okay, Im never gonna wear them again. I just didnt get a chance to say goodbye.
Joey: Dina, if youre having a baby you should be married! Even if it is to Bobby! (Bobby gets happy.) Dude, thats not a compliment!
Rachel: Hey, now wait a minute! I get when you told people at first that you wanted to be an actor they laughed at you! Now come on Bobby, why dont you tell us a little bit about your band?
Joey: One pregnant woman at a time, please! I just want you to be okay.
Joey: So whoa-whoa-whoa-whoa! What are you gonna do? Youre gonna have the baby and-and raise it by yourself without a husband?! You cant be a single mother alone! Youre gonna ruin your life!
Joey: I was just outside Barcelona hiking in the foothills of Mount Tibidabo. I was at the end of this path and I came to a clearing and there was a lake, very secluded. And there were tall trees all around. (Whispering) It was dead silent. Gorgeous. (Softly) And across the lake I saw a beautiful woman bathing herself but she was crying
Joey: You got pregnant for funny?! Dina if hes funny laugh! All right, Ill be back in a little while! You stay here!
Rachel: Okay Bobby, why dont we just come over here and let them have a little moment. (Drags Bobby away from Joey and Dina.)
The Teacher: Right. Are you looking for Jacks parents to discuss the problems hes having with Ben? (Phoebe nods Yes.) Yeah. Because I really do think the parents should sit down and have a conversation.
Phoebe: Wait a second! This is about the fourth month of your pregnancy, right?
Phoebe: Yeah. Yeah, I remember trying to steal a cardboard cutout of Evander Holyfield from a Foot Locker.
Rachel: Well, yknow what? I go see my doctor tomorrow, Ill ask her about this. Maybe she can give me a pill or something.
Phoebe: Yeah. Yeah, thats what you need a good pill.
Ross: Wow! That is a good one! Wow, it looks like a, like a holiday card yknow, with the tree in the middle and the skaters and the snow.
Phoebe: (sitting down next to Ross) Yknow she has a face Ross!
[Scene: The Airport, Chandler and Monica are following the previous couple through a tiny hallway that proves this is a set on a sound stage and not an actual airport, and see them enter the first class lounge.]
Mona: Okay. Okay, heres a good one of us.
Phoebe: Wait, Im-Im sorry. Whats the big deal about a holiday card?
Ross: Married couples send out cards, families send out cards, people who have been dating for a couple of months do not send out cards! What-what is she crazy?!
Doug: Hi. So good news, the divorce is final. I signed the papers this A.M.
Doug: Oh well, give it time. So the divorce, the marriage, weve got a lot to celebrate. How about we all go out to dinner tomorrow night?
[Scene: Ross's Apartment, theres a knock on the door and he opens it to Mona.]
Ross: A hundred?! Well, I-I guess Ill take aMona, uh I-Im not sure about the whole uh, card thing.
Mona: How many did you want? Im getting a hundred.
Ross: Sending out a holiday card, together, I mean I just dont know if were really quite there yet.
Mona: Oh yknow, I didnt think of it that way. Youre right. Youre right. So, can I ask you a question?
Dr. Schiff: Uh, I dont have a wife or girlfriend, but I do like to ski.
Chandler: Im sorry. When you were in high school you made out with a 50-year-old woman?
Dr. Schiff: Im a doctor.
Phoebe: Give her a key to your apartment.
Ross: Yeah, were not just doing a card! Yknow, she-she also wants to have the conversation about where the relationship is going.
Monica: You and Mona are doing a holiday card together?
Ross: Hey! You were a closed book! Okay? Im not a mind reader! Besides, I hate those conversations. Im horrible at them. Really! Maybe-maybe I need kind of a gesture. Yknow, something that says were moving forward without having to talk about it.
Monica: Making her a mixed tape?
Monica: That is a slap in the face.
Rachel: I think, if it was a little colder in here I could see your nipples through that sweater.
Doug: Whats going on Bing? Does uh, your wife have a problem with me or something?
Ross: Here we go. Mona umm, I think its time we-we had a conversation about-about where things are with us.
Doug: Bing my boy, were gonna get you over this. Now heres the plan, grab your coat, were going to a strip club.
Ross: Aw, we-we are so (Motions that theyre connected.) So umm, well I-I-I like you and I-I love umm, yknow hanging out with you. And I mean-Im having a lot of fun. (He pauses and thinks there might be more, but decides there isnt.)
Ross: She sweat, wet. got it going like a turbo 'vette.
Phoebe: I had a great time. (accent) It was really top drawer. And here's something rich: thirteen bathrooms in this place... I threw up in the coat closet... Ta taaa...
Ross: Not just a key, I gave her the only key! I am now a homeless person in a very serious relationship.
Ross: But thats not enough. So So heres a key to my apartment. (Hands her his key.)
Rachel: You gave her a key to your apartment?!
Phoebe: Its okay, hes a virgin.
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's, Ross is telling Rachel and Monica about yet another mistake hes made with a woman.]
Doug: Oh Bing, look at those twin sisters dancing together. Let me buy you a lap dance with those girls. Huh?
Mona: I dont understand. You-you give me a key to your apartment and then you change the lock.
Ross: Okay, and oh Im gonna need a bunch of extra keys. Apparently I give them away for no reason at all.
Ross: Im trying to tell you I made you a mix tape.
Monica: I promise. Hey, speaking of together, how about we send out a holiday card this year?
Doug: No, its a wedding ring. You gotta get rid of it. Were gonna go to the East River right now and throw it in there!
Chandler: It was awful. To get out of going to dinner with Doug I told him that you and I split up. So then he took me to all these strip clubs and sleazy bars, and then when I wouldnt give him my wedding ring, he threw a soda can at a bird!
Chandler: Yknow what the worse part was? I got to see what my life would be like without you. It was like Its a Wonderful Life with lap dances. Please promise that you will never leave me, that we will grow old together, and be with each other for the rest of our lives.
Rachel: Im sorry honey, Im just having a, having a rough day.
Joey: Good, I uh, I saw a pretty big pigeon.
(They both go into their rooms and after a little while Rachel pokes her head into the living room.)
Ross: It used to be. Now she doesnt really have a face. Smokin body though.
Joey: No, no, no more! I cannot lose another dime! Im serious this time! In-in fact, look, theres aI wanna give you something. And let me give it too you know before I pawn it for Cups money. (He rolls the big white dog over) Now, I want you to have the big white dog as a kinda of a, yknow, thank you for being such a great roommate.
Phoebe: Hey! I got you a present!!
Monica: Well, you justyou put a quarter in and yknow pull-pull some handles and win like a candy bar or something.
Phoebe: Its a Ms. Pac-Man machine!!
Chandler: A vending machine?
Chandler: Yeah, we talked and Monica made me see that I over reacted a little bit and some things in life are more important.
Ross: (squatting and reading the instructions) I'm supposed to attach a brackety thing to the side things, using a bunch of these little worm guys. I have no brackety thing, I see no whim guys whatsoever and- I cannot feel my legs.
Joey: I got a big date coming up, do you know a good restaurant?
Joey: Oh, I like that, yeah. Wasn't at the parade because I had a family emergency.
Rachel: What?! Joey, you dont want to go on a date with a pregnant lady.
Joey: You sure are naming a lot of ways to postpone sex, Ill tell ya
Chandler: Who cares? Its a stupid game.
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's, Rachel is getting ready for her date with Joey as there is a knock on the door.]