words in movies
Chandler: Wait a minute, wait. Youre telling me this actress person is the only woman you ever wanted who didnt want you back?!
Phoebe: Wait, am I missing something though? Cause I thought death was something thats supposed to be sad, in a way.
Ross: Well ah, Aunt Silvia was, well not a nice person.
Monica: Oh, she was a cruel, cranky, old bitch! (Ross gives her a look) (to Ross) And Im sorry she died. Did Dad say I get the dollhouse?
Phoebe: Wow, a house for dolls, that is so cool! When I was kid, I had a barrel.
Joey: Uh, Pheebs, you had a barrel for a dollhouse?
Phoebe: No, just a barrel.
Joanna: Bing! Thats a great name.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Monica is showing off her new dollhouse. Its a huge dollhouse, that takes up the entire living room table.]
Monica: Look at it! Ohhh! Wallpapers a little faded, thats okay. Carpets a little loose. Hardwood floors!!
Phoebe: I brought a bunch of stuff for the house, so check it out. Ha-ha. (She removes this large ceramic dog that comes up to the second floor and places it next to the house.)
Phoebe: Thats a dog, every house should have a dog.
Chandler: (holding a tissue) And is this in case the house sneezes?
Monica: I dont want a ghost.
Phoebe: Well, nobody wants a ghost. But youve got one, because the house is sitting on an ancient Indian burial ground.
Ross: Wait a minute, the house was built on radioactive waste, and an ancient Indian burial ground? That would never happen.
Phoebe: (holding a dinosaur) Okay, dinosaur attack!! Quick, everybody into the house!! Ahh-ahh! (the dinosaur starts attacking the house. She starts to bark like a dog.) Roof! Rrroof-roof-roof!
The Director: Hey, lovely! Come, talk to me a minute! (she goes over to him)
Lauren: I know! I-Im a big fan of yours.
Lauren: (laughing) Oh, youre so funny. Listen, umm, what are you doing after rehearsals? Do you want to get a drink, or something?
Joey: Well Ahh, (he sees Kate and the director kissing) yeah! Yeah, sure, a drink sounds great.
Phoebe: Oh, okay, its the slide instead of stairs. Watch this. (She slides a doll down the slide)
(Monica is looking on with a hurt expression on her face.)
Phoebe: Watch, watch. (She turns a strand of Christmas lights strung around the house.)
Phoebe: And, and! (She turns on a bubble maker.)
Chandler: Well, the movie was great, dinner was great, and theres nothing like a cool, crisp New York evening.
Chandler: Of course, I didnt get to enjoy any of that, because Joannas such a big, dull dud!
Joanna: Oh, and hes got such a good heart! Doesnt he have a good heart?
[A phone rings.]
Joey: (to Kate) That guys like a cartoon. What do you see in him anyway?
The Director: Stop!! Stop it! You must stop! You are bad actors! This is a terrible play! Ill see you in the morning. (exits)
Kate: I cant believe we go on in, in a week.
Joey: Okay. (he gives her a peck on the cheek)
Kate: Well, Adrians looking for a reason to stay, right? Victor cant just kiss her, hes gotta, gotta really give her a reason, y'know?
(He walks up behind Monica and gives her a big hug and a kiss on the neck.)
(He walks over behind Ross, thinks about it for a moment, and gives him a big hug.)
Ross: Its a little early to be drinkin.
Chandler: (entering with Rachel) Im telling ya, Joannas got it all wrong. Okay? All I said was, This was fun. Lets do it again sometime. Ill give you a call.
Chandler: Thats what you say at the end of a date.
Chandler: To her face? Look its the end of the date, Im standing there, I know all shes waiting for is for me to say Ill call her and its just y'know, comes out. I cant help it, its a compulsion.
Monica: Come on Rach, when a guy says hes going to call, it doesnt mean hes going to call. Hasnt it ever happened to you?
[Scene: Central Perk, Chandler is reading a magazine as Rachel approaches.]
Chandler: All right! Fine! But its just a lunch date, no more than an hour! And from now on I get my own dates, I dont want you setting me up with anybody ever again!
Chandler: Thats just a lot of big talk, y'know.
Ross: Oh, fire! There, theres a fire! Fire!!
[He tries to blow it out, and obviously, it doesnt work. He runs over to the sink to get a glass of water to put out the fire, but since Monica is in the shower the water pressure is very low and takes a long time to fill the glass. In desperation he takes the half full glass over and dumps it on the fire, it doesnt work. He then picks up the dollhouse and considers bringing it over to the sink, but decides to take it into the bathroom and use the shower to put it out. He kicks open the door and we hear Monica scream at the top of her lungs.]
Kate: Nooo. And theres really no reason he should find out, so ah lets not make a big deal about it, okay?
Joey: What are you talking about? It was a big deal. I mean, come on you cant tell me last night didnt mean something to you. I-I was there, youre not that good an actress.
Kate: Look umm, I, I was, I was just caught up in the moment. Thats all it was. Joey, Im-Im sorry you feel bad, but havent you ever sleep with a women where it meant more to her than it did to you?
Monica: (runs over to her) I tried to reach you at work. Theres....been a fire.
Ross: Well, we believe it originated here. (He uses a pointer and points to the point of origin.) In the Aroma Room.
Phoebe: Ohh. What is this? (She sees a tissue covering something, and moves to remove it.)
(She picks up a charred piece of plastic that once was the Foster puppets, and starts to break down. Monica goes over and comforts her.)
Chandler: Its not a big deal. Its, just its right here, (points to his eye) and its all the time.
Chandler: Well, this was great. Ill give you a call. We should do it again sometime. (Rachel is disappointed)
Chandler: Well this is great! Ill give you a call! We should do it again sometime!
Monica: Not until you said it. Somebody switch! (Chandler makes a clicking sound with his fingers and Phoebe runs to the other wall. Monica returns to Chandlers wall.) Wait a minute... Ross and Charlie, Joey and Rachel, Phoebe and Mike! We're the only people leaving with the same person we came with.
[The next one is from Episode 608: The One With Rosss Teeth, Chandler is accusing Joey of becoming less of a man.]
Monica: (also hugs the wall) Yeah, we had a great time, thank you! (walks to Phoebe)
Monica: Honey, if you know it through a wall, you know it too well!
Charlie: Joey is a great guy, but we're just... so different! I mean, during your speech he kept laughing at homo erectus!
Ross: Can I talk to you for a minute?
(Now Joey also wants to listen, and wants to press his ears against the door, which has a big mirror on it, he hesitates seeing himself in the mirror, but still puts his ear against it. We move again to Rachel's room.)
ROSS: No. Man I don't wanna have to have Joey with me every time I wanna descent cup of coffee. Ya know, and I don't wanna spend the rest of my life drinking cappucino with a 'K'. I say you and I go back down there and stand up to those guys.
Joey: (long pause and he twitches a bit) You're a pain in my ass, Geller!
Chandler: You're not supposed to take that. Besides, it's a New Testament, what are you gonna do with it?
Charlie: Yeah, sounds like a good idea... Dr. Geller!
Chandler: What d'ya know... It's a treat for the eyes and the ears.
Mike: I have a date.
Phoebe: You have a... You have a date? With who?
Ross: Right, I'm gonna go talk to Joey. I think this is the right time. He's always in a good mood after the flight attendant says "duty free".
Ross: Do you mind if I sit here for a sec.?
Phoebe: Oh, okay... good. You do that. And then when you get home, maybe there'll be a special delivery package waiting for you.
Rachel: Ross is coming over. I think now would be a really good time to talk to him.
Rachel: (nearly whispering) Ok, let's not make a big thing about this!
Chandler: You got a man who's a nanny...? You got a manny...? (Monica starts laughing, but very exaggerated. Joey realises they also should laugh and punches Ross. Now all three of them laugh, but very fake. Chandler seems happy again.)
Ross: Ah, yeah. We had a really good talk.
Ross: I actually had a topic in mind! Im, Im kinda going through a dry spell, sex wise.
Joey: I couldn't. He was saying all these really nice things about me. I didn't want him to get mad and take 'em all back. I'm on a edge on Chandler.
Mike: One more thing... There... might be a picture of Precious on my coffee table.
Phoebe: Yeah, you can't do that! Oh, come on Mike, strap on a pair.Why don't you just tell her that we got back together. You know, women appreciate honesty. We also appreciate gentle spanking once in a while. Just F.Y.I.
Mike: Anyway, I just wanna give you a heads up.
Rachel: Ah, why, now I can't get a massage? There are so many things that she disapproves of! I can't eat veal, I can't wear fur, I can't go hunting...
Ross: (gasps) Hi... There she is. Hi Emma. Oh my God, I missed you. (kisses her) Oh Emma, I missed you so much. Hey... Did you have a good time with grandma Green? Huh? Did she give you a bottle of anti-depressants again to use as a rattle? (to Rachel)
JOEY: All right.� All right.� Then, maybe you won't mind if me and my friend take a look around, huh?� (He checks the bathroom shaking the bat.� Then he proceeds to their bedroom.)� Bwa-ah-ah!
Joey: Youre ready to have a baby? My boys all grown up!
Rachel: Wow! Well, clearly this is not a good time.
Conan: But audiencesYou have a live studio audience and they must love that. They must love it when they see you guys playing.
Phoebe: Look, Precious... Mike's not worth this. You're an attractive, intelligent woman and let's face it, Mike's kind of a wang. I mean, he proposed to me while he was still seeing you... He was gonna break-up with you on your birthday? And, I don't like to kiss-and-tell, but he cheated on you a lot this weekend.
Rachel: I can make you a legend. I can make you this generations Milton Berle.
Phoebe: Okay, not a fan of the tough love.
Rachel: Yeah, I just get a little bummed when my birthday's over.
Monica: I have a problem.
(Chandler enters the bathroom, and Monica is standing there in a towel, with her hair stuck in the shower curtain.)
Chandler: Honey, you've been in there for a long time... Is everything okay?
Joey: No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no... I think it's better if you tell him, you know. It's easier for a woman. That way, you know, if he gets mad, all you have to do is go... I didn't mean it. I'm so so--ooory. (he pushes his breasts together from the side)
Rachel: Well, I tried, but then he had a shampoo related emergency. So I guess now it's your turn again.
Chandler: (trying to untangle her) Some of these look a little frayed.
Joey: Yeah! Good night! (they give each other a small kiss on the mouth, and stare at each other for a while)
Monica: Hey, Rachel, Can-can I see you for a sec?
Rachel: No, come on, that is a lie. We also kissed in Barbados.
Chandler: Oh, thanks! I'm... actually thinking about becoming a motivational speaker.
Rachel: Well, it would be easier to move just right across the hall. Wait a minute, unless youre thinking about Naked Wednesdays.
Chandler: There's a hair in my coffee.
Joey: Look, don't you think that will be a little weird?
Phoebe: Well, if you're having a hard time, you should talk to my friends, Bill and Colleen. They adopted a kid. I'm sure they'd help you.
Chandler: (Picks up the "Miss Congeniality" DVD) She's an FBI agent, posing as a beauty contestant.
Frank Jr.: Alright, alright, alright. Remember what we talked about. When we're in a public place, there are certain rules.
Ross: Absolutely. (Very Squeaky.) I'm fine! Totally fine. I don't know why it's coming out all loud and squeaky, 'cause really, (deep voice) I'm fine. I'm not saying I wasn't a little surprised to see you guys kissing. I mean, at first I was like.. (Screams.) But now that I've had time to absorb it; Lovin' this.
Joey: (entering from the elevator caring gifts for the kids) Hey, you guys! Look what I found in the giiiiiiift shop. (He doubles over in pain in front an old man in a wheel chair.) Get up! Get up! Get up! (The old man waves him away.)
(Joey sees that she's carrying a small red bag.)
Joey: Yeah. Okay. (Goes to take a bite out of the previously mentioned bagel.) Whoa! (Stops.) I almost forgot this was on your
Joey: So, did you bring a little something for Ross?
Ross: Oh! That is so thoughtful. (To Joey.) She's a keeper. And what did you bring me? (Grabs the bag that Charlie brought for Joey.)
Ross: You know what? That is a very good idea. I'm gonna go make a pitcher of Margaritas.
Joey: Okay, listen, hey, Ross. Why don't you try to relax, okay? Maybe have a drink.
Charlie: Gosh, Ross, you know, you seem a little...
Phoebe: Well, they may be a handful, but they're so cute.
Phoebe: That's a, that's a long time.
(She gives Monica a big binder that's perfectly in order.)
Chandler: I mean, you have a lovely home.
Monica: Thank you. (To Chandler.) I think I just had a tiny orgasm.
(Cut to the hall. Owen is wearing his scout-uniform and is looking through a box when Chandler walks up to him.)
Chandler: You know how to use a compass?
Owen: I have a badge in it.
Ross: But you know what, if you think about it, it actually promotes a healthy uhm... body image... because... even big butts or uhm... juicy doubles.
(Chandler tries to come up with a good answer.)
Rachel: Look, Charlie, I just want you to know. Ross is just having a little trouble adjusting to the thought of Joey and me. You know, he normally doesn't drink like this.
Joey: I'd take you out for a romantic night. Some champagne, fancy dinner, feel you up on the carriage ride home...
Ross: We make a great foursome. We should do more stuff together. Ooh! Let's take a trip. Okay, where do you think we - we can go?
Rachel: (panics, turns around, picks up the phone, and pretend to talk on it) Hello?! (Listens) Oh, yeah! (To Tag) This is gonna be a while. Excuse me. (Tag leaves and she closes the door behind him, disgustedly.) Yeah!
(Ross enters carrying a frying pan with fajitas - without any oven mitts.)
Chandler: Oh, and dont get me wrong, I appreciate the sentiment. Its just that I, I have a rather, sensitive posterior, and ah, besides, its making all the other guys jealous.
Rachel: All right Joey! That is enough! (Grabs him and pulls him away from Bobby and Dina) Listen, as beautiful and moving as this ceremony is, its not legal. Okay? They-they dont have a marriage license, they dont have any witnesses, and the groom only has on one shoe!
Frank Jr.: What's green and says "hey, I'm a frog"? A talking frog! (Laughs.) Oh, no, you can't have him, he's too funny.
Frank Jr.: Oh, you'd be getting a really good one. I mean, you know, he's really funny. Like, the other day he made up this joke.
Ross: Oh. Listen, do you think- and try not to let my intense vulnerability become any kind of a factor herebut do you think it would be okay if I asked you out? Sometime? Maybe?
Frank Jr.: Oh, no, no, you can't have Chandler, no. No, no. She's my little genius. I got big hopes for her. She's gonna be a doctor or a realtor..
Frank Jr. (looks at the triplets): Look at them! Aw. I love you so much. (Strokes Leslie's hair, and she moves a little.) Oh crap, don't wake up, don't wake up!
Colleen: I'll go get him in a second. By the way, you should know we haven't told him he's adopted yet.
Chandler: I'm so sorry, but you should have a sign out there or something. Or at least whisper it to people when they come in the door. "Owen doesn't know he's adopted, and he also thinks that Santa is real."
Ross: Everyone? I would like to make a toast to Rachel and Joey.
Charlie: I'm sorry, I have a really early class in the morning, but this has been lovely.
Ross: Oh, oh. Of course. God, I'm so stupid. You guys are a couple now. I mean, you probably just want to be alone.
Rachel: Yeah, that's probably a good idea.
Ross: Except we're not. I mean, we haven't been a couple in like, six years. Oh my god, is that right? Has it been that long?
Steve: It's really fulfilling doing something you hate for no money. That's right. I have no money, I'm not funny, I live in a studio apartment with two other guys, and I'm pretty sure I'm infertile.
(Ross smiles and holds up his hand for a high-five, but he has forgotten about his burnt hands. He gasps in pain as Joey grabs his hand.)
Phoebe: Because I was ashamed ok? I sold out for the cash! And then they give me benefits like medical, and dental, and a 401K. But you know... you pay a price. Now I'm this Corporate stooge and punching a clock and Ugh! paying taxes!
Ross: Eh, you got a spray-on tan?
Chandler: Sure, then you should get a mini skirt so you can really show it off.
Ross: I made a man twice my size cry. I mean, I havent done that since I was four and I washed my dads Porsche with rocks.
Chandler: You mean like this? (he starts touching his thigh in a funny and awkard way)
Charlie: Oh, Newcastle disease is a secretion borne virus that only affects chickens and... other poultry.
Phoebe: Hey. Here. (Hands Chandler a copy of her flyer and sees the picture of Ralph.) Ohh, whos the silver fox?
Chandler: Really? Like you have a routine?