words in movies
Ross: What, are we keeping Thanksgiving a secret this year?
Chandler: Now, that's a lot harder than it sounds. You always forget at least one, or in some cases... fourteen (looks over to Monica).
Monica: It's a stupid game and I wasn't playing against other people, so technically I didn't lose.
Joey: Hey! How is New England not a state? Huh? They have a sports-team!
Chandler: Does South Oregon have a sports-team? (Joey strikes one from his list) There you go.
Chandler: Oooh that may be a New World's record (Looks at his watch and picks up Ross' pad)
Ross: You know, I hate to lecture you guys, but it's kinda disgraceful, that a group of well-educated adults and Joey can't name all the states. Did you ever see a map, or one of those round, colorful things called "a globe?" Hmm?
Joey: (gets up) All right. Don't look at my list, Ross, 'cause there's a lot on there that you don't have.
Monica: Chandler? Can you give me a hand? (Grabs her jacket)
Joey: Don't worry, Chandler, it's not a globe of the United States.
[Chandler and Monica head out with some stuff. Phoebe comes out of her room with a bag.]
Phoebe: Hey you guys I'm gonna go out and take a walk.
Phoebe: It's just my knitting that's all! (A dog sticks its head out of Phoebe's bag. Everyone looks puzzled.) Yes! I knit this. I'm very good.
Chandler: I don't know. Maybe it's because it smells a little weird. It's like old pumpkins or something.
Monica: We left Joey alone with the food! (Walks towards the window and looks out) Yep! Yep, I knew it! There he is... feeding stuffing to a dog!
Monica: Phoebe, why is there a dog in our apartment?
Monica: Phoebe, there's a dog sitting on my couch!
Phoebe: No that's just me coughing! (Doing some weird coughing noises and the dog barks again. Phoebe comes out of the room.) Oh, good, there you are! Listen, um, I have a dog in my room.
Chandler: Extremely allergic, okay? If I'm anywhere near a dog for more than 5 minutes, my throat will just close up!
Monica: Chandler, if that dog's been here that long, and you haven't had a reaction, maybe you're not allergic to this dog?
Chandler: They are needy, they are jumpy, and you can't tell what they are thinking, and that scares me a little bit.
Ross: Right, they are scary. (He jumps up, screaming) Ahh, she just ate a treat out of my hand!!!
Rachel: Wait a minute. Do you not like all dogs? I mean, not even puppies?
Chandler: (scared) Is there a puppy here?
Chandler: Okay, it's just that dogs make me a little uncomfortable.
Ross: How can I not get this? I'm a college professor; I got 1450 on my S.A.T.s.
Phoebe: All right. We're gonna take Clunkers to Rosss. We'll be back in a minute. (Gets up with Monica to do so.)
Rachel: Oh, wait before you guys go, can I just ask you a question?
Rachel: When a guy breaks up with his girlfriend, what is an appropriate amount of time to wait before you make a move?
Phoebe: Oh, I'd say about a month.
Joey: All right, Rach, the big question is, does he like you? All right? Because if he doesn't like you, this is all a moo-point.
Rachel: Huh. A moo-point?
Joey: Yeah, it's like a cow's opinion. It just doesn't matter. It's moo.
Rachel: So were you guys together a long time?
Tag: A year. On and off. I kinda thought we'd end up together. I don't anymore.
Tag: It's weird. I always used to assume, that I would meet someone and fall in love and be happy and all that was just a given. But lately it's like what if it's not. Do you ever have that feeling?
Rachel: Well, what is a boss for? Hug it out! (They hug)
Tag: Wait-wait a minute; that doesn't make any sense.
Rachel: Yeah, I admit it. I have a crush on you, and uh, and, and I know that's crazy because we work together, and-and nothing could ever happen, and the last thing I want to do is-is to freak you out or make you feel uncomfortable. Which is why it would be really great if you said something right about now.
Tag: Right there! That's my car! (Sound of a breaking car-window) Hey!!
Rachel: Okay, that's gonna take them a minute. Do you have anything else you wanna get off your chest?
Rachel: (she hurries after him) Wait, we still have time to talk and theyre-they're not even in the car yet! (She takes a quick look down the street.) Oh look, there they go, okay. (She hurries in, too)
[They both get up and head for the door. Clunkers whines a little]
[Scene: Monica, Chandler, and Phoebe's. Ross lays a lot off small papers, shaped like the U.S. states onto the floor making a map with the states. Phoebe enters]
(We can hear the dog whining at a high pitch.)
Ross: Oh, is it? Is it? Look, when Monica and I were kids, we had a dog named Rover. And, uh, one day, my dad decides, he doesn't like dogs. So Monica and her friend Phyllis take away the dog. And that was the last time we ever saw him. Don't you see? This is just like that. Only with a few details changed.
Joey: (entering) Okay, I'm in my sweat pants. Bring on the food! (Sees that Chandler has a worried look on his face) What's the matter?
Joey: So? Bring the dog back, you're a hero.
Chandler: Yeah, I can be a hero, I could do that. I could, I could do... I, w-w-what if, what if it attacks me?
Joey: Chandler, it's like a big gerbil.
Ross: From you? (He does a weird desperate laughter, like he's almost crying) Yes, please!
[Time lapse, Ross still laying a lot out the states.]
Rachel: Yeah, ohh! Why, damnit, why did I open my mouth? (In a girlish voice) I have a crush on you; I am attracted to you. (Back to normal again) Gee, I-I know that I freaked him out
Chandler: No, no he went for a walk.
[The door opens and Chandler comes in. Rachel covers the door with a blanket]
Phoebe: It's a Thanksgiving miracle!
Monica: Thats not true, you dont have a moustache.
[Scene: Central Perk, the gang, except Rachel, is watching a new singer.]
(They all laugh indifferently, except Chandler, whos a little angry.)
Phoebe: Oh-ho yeah! A song with rhyming words. Oo, I never thought of that before.
Phoebe: Oh, okay, I learned how to shoot a lay-up, a foul shot, and a twenty-three pointer.
ROSS: Believe me, I've been dreaming about me and Rachel for ten years now. But now, I'm with Julie, so it's like me and Julie, me and Rachel, me and Julie, me and... [Rachel enters, carrying a tray]... Rachel. Rachel, Rachel.
Chandler: Jeez, man did you fall..(sees its a beautiful woman coming out of the mens room) Hi! So ah, did ya, did-did-did ya fall high?
[Chandler starts to light a cigarette.]
[Scene: Rachels office, Mark is packing his stuff into a box.]
Rachel: Nooo, hes leaving for a better job.
Rachel: I can get a quick bite to eat, but then I have to come back up here.
Ross: Oh well thats great, so I guess this is ah, this is good bye then. Huh? (picks a pad up off Rachels desk and tosses it into his box) Good bye.
Phoebe: Oh. (takes her beeper puts in a pot, covers it, and puts the pot in the oven)
Leslie: I ran into Vlad at the place where they sell the big fish, and he said you played here a lot, so umm....
Phoebe: You never run on a barge!
Chandler: Well, thats the best kiss Ive had with anyone Ive ever met in a mens room.
[Scene: A street, Chandler is kissing Ginger.]
Rachel: I dont know, you thought See you Saturday was funny. Look honey, Mark is in fashion okay, I like having a friend that I can share this stuff with. You guys would never want to go to a lecture with me.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Phoebe and Monica are playing with a Ouija board, Phoebes beeper goes off and Monica screams.]
Rachel: Okay. Honey, I would love for you to go with me. (Ross has a worried look on his face) What?
Monica: Y'know those are a delicacy in India.
Monica: Yes. Well I got his machine and I left a message. But it's okay, it's okay, it's okay, because you know it was like a casual, breezy message. It was breezy! Oh God, what if it wasn't breezy?
Leslie: What? Why not? You could make a ton of money.
Phoebe: Okay, well if I was in this for the money, Id be a millionaire by now, y'know. You just got to get out of that jingle head sweetie.
Phoebe: I..., a jingle? No, no-no-no, no.
(Ross wakes up with a start and startles Rachel. The guy next to him starts laughing, which starts Ross laughing, Rachel gives him a look and he stops.)
Chandler: Oh, come on, theres a rest stop right up there! Come on, I really have to goooooooooo.
Chandler: Oh, I hate that. I once had a thing of half and half, stole my car.
CHAN: Does anyone have one from a different paper? Ross, read yours.
Ross: (entering) So I nodded off a little.
MONICA: All right, look, Ross. I realize that you have issues with Carol and Susan, and I feel for you, I do. But if you don't help me cook, I'm gonna take a bunch of those little hot dogs, and I'm gonna create a new appetizer called "pigs in Ross". All right, ball the melon.
Ross: No. I... I wanted to be with you. I dont know, I feel like lately, I feel like youre slipping away from me, y'know. With this new job, and all these new people, and youve got this whole other life going on. I-I-I know its dumb, but I hate that Im not a part of it.
Rachel: Its not dumb. But, maybe its okay that youre not a part of it. Y'know what I mean? (Ross looks confused) I mean its like, I-I-I like that youre not involved in that part of my life.
Joey: All right!! Okay, it was like four years ago. Okay, Ginger and I had gone out a few times, and then this one weekend, we went up to her Dads cabin. Just me, her, and her annoying little dog Pepper. Well that night, I cooked this really romantic dinner....
Ginger: Whats a nubbin?
Chandler: Its kinda a ah, a third nipple kinda thing.
Phoebe: Okay, dont give me a reason to get mad, okay
Rachel: Wow! I mean, I justI cant, I cant believe this. Yknow, I mean you think you know someone even, even Phoebe whos always been somewhat of a question mark.
Ross: Just one uh, one additional relationship thought. Probably something your already familiar with, uh, women talk! (smacks Chandler over the head with a magazine)
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Joey is taking a jar of olives out of the fridge.]
Monica: Oh, but wait I do have a globe.
Phoebe: Ick-neck-tree-anis..... Theres a g in there.
Issac: Chloe, switch with me, theres some guys here that got a crush on you.
Chandler: Dear God! This parachute is a knapsack! (throws himself over the back of the chair he was sitting in)
(They both start laughing. They look at each other, stop and step apart a little bit.)
Phoebe: It will be in a minute. Listen, Tim youre a really great guy.
Monica: All right ah, Ross, this is the extent of my knowledge on the subject. (holds up a notepad) Call Rachel.
Monica: Wait a minute! (Quickly checks her pockets and pulls out ) My last Kit-Kat bar!
Rachel: Well, there was a disaster in shipping and Ive got to get this order in. Honey, Im so sorry, but it looks like Im gonna be here all night.
Chandler: She was.... But y'know what, just in case, maybe we should come up with a set of ground rules.
[Scene: A Restaurant, Monica and Chandler are on their date with Janice and Clark, however Clark is a no show and Janice is crying the Mississippi River about it.]
Ross: (entering, carrying a basket) Hi!
Rachel: Ross honey, this is very nice, but, but I-I got a crisis.
Chandler: Me too. I wanna find a baby that needs a home and I wanna raise it with you. And I wanna mess it up in our own specific way.
Chandler: Yeah, I-I-I think so. (Pauses and thinks about it for a second) Yeah, I-I think so...
Rachel: Im sorry, as I was saying the store number is wrong, and Im sorry but thats... (notices a fire that Rosss candle has started) Oh my God!!
Ross: Okay, you dont have to stop, Im invisible, Im not here. (lights a candle)
Ross: (putting out the fire with a squeeze bottle of water) Okay, thats a fire. Oh yeah. Oh yeah.
Phoebe: Really?! Oh thats so exciting! Thank you! Thanks Mon! Oh but Mon, if you touch my guitar again Ill have to pound on you for a little bit.
(Ross starts to pack up the picnic in anger, and throws a three hole punch in the basket.)
Rachel: (throws her stuff down) I was gonna give you a chance to apologise to me.
Ross: Yeah, well you never have the time. I mean, I dont feel like I even have a girlfriend anymore, Rachel.
Rachel: Just a job!
Ross: No, hey, I get that, okay, I get that big time. And Im happy for ya, but Im tired of having a relationship with your answering machine! Okay, I dont know what to do anymore.
Rachel: Wh, Ross what do you want from me? You want me, you want me to quit my job so you can feel like you have a girlfriend?
Rachel: No. (Ross is standing in the doorway.) A break from us.
Issac: Yo, Chloe, do you have a quarter for the condom machine?
[Scene: A Restaurant, Monica and Phoebe are on their dates with Sergei and Mischa.]
[Scene: Rachels office, Rachel and a co-worker (Sophie) are dealing with the crisis.]
Rachel: (entering from her bedroom) You guys, (holds up an outfit) does this look like something the girlfriend of a paleontologist would wear?
Rachel: During a blackout? He'd get trampled!
Monica: Well, I was having a conversation.
Mischa: (to Phoebe, very quickly) Eh, he said, thank you very much, he thinks you look very pretty tonight, your hair, golden like the sun. (to Monica) So you're a chef?
Monica: What do you want me to do? Just sit here silently while you three have a conversation?
Rachel: You had no right coming down to my office Ross. You do not bring a picnic basket to somebodys work! Unless maybe they were a park ranger!
Rachel: Oh, and then, we got into this big, stupid fight. I just, it was awful. I told him he treats me like a park ranger, or something, oh and then I told him I wanted to take a break, I dont want to take a break.
Ross: Okay, okay, fine, youre right. Lets ah, lets take a break, (goes to the door) lets cool off, okay, lets get some frozen yogart, or something.. (opens the door)
Chandler: You know, I don't get this. A month ago, these people were my friends. You know, just because I'm in charge doesn't mean I'm a different person.
Mischa: (to Monica) And the vet said it was time. And so from half a world away, while my Mother held the phone to his ear, I said good bye to my dog,. In seven languages.
Ross: Look, I dont feel like dancing, I feel like having a drink. Okay?
(Sergei insults Mischa, and they get into a huge fight, in Russian.)
Sergei: Uh, (picks up a plate) plate?
Chandler: Oh I do! Op, no, wait a minute, I took it out of my shirt when I put it on this morning.
Sergei: (picking up a cup) Plate?
(She kisses him. Ross leans back for a second, and then they both kiss, more passionately this time as U2's With or Without You plays in the background.)
Phoebe: Yeah, but this (makes Monica's face) isn't the face of a person who trusts a person. Ok, this (makes Monica's face) is the face of a person who, you know, doesn't trust a person.
Ross: I mean, I dont feel like I even have a girlfriend anymore.
Monica: So, if youre parents hadnt got divorced, youd be able to answer a question like a normal person?
Joey: Oh man, pizza? I like pizza. (makes like he is trying to send a telepathic message to Rachel) Put olives on the pizza.
Rachel: You want me to just quit my job so that you can feel like youve got a girlfriend?
Rachel: No. A break from us.
Phoebe: Ameri-can. Y'know its a very hard language. Lets do it again.
Rachel: Then, we had this big, stupid fight, and I said I wanted to take a break, I dont want to take a break.
Rachel: Phoebe, that is juice, squeezed from a person.
ROSS: Look, that has nothing to do with this, ok? She's my ex-wife. If she were marrying a guy, none of you'd expect me to be there.
Phoebe: All right y'know what, nevermind! Everyone wants to have a green one! Im sorry, Im sorry, I didnt mean to get so emotional, I guess its just the holidays, its hard.
Ross: Fine, youre right. Lets ah, lets take a break, (goes to the door) lets cool off, okay, lets get some frozen yoghurt, or something.. (opens the door)
(Ross finds a clock, sees its almost 8:30, and silently screams.)
Ross: Umm, oh, hey, I dont know. How about a big one?
Ross: Well then a small one!! Listen, lets, we kinda have to get going!