words in movies
[Scene: Monica and Chandlers apartment, everyone except Ross is decorating the tree.]
Phoebe: That is nice and were done. TADA!
[Scene: Central Perk, everyone except Phoebe and Joey are there.]
Ross: and thats the story of the dreidle. Now, some people trace the Christmas tree back to the Egyptians, who used to bring green palm branches into their huts on the shortest day of the year, symbolising lifes triumph over death. And that was like 4000 years ago.
Joey: I know. And shes so sweet. I just wanna feed her grapes and brush her hair.
Monica: Oh my God! We love that show! I mean Ross and I have been watching it since I can remember!
Janine: Thanks. (To Monica and Ross) Great so we can all go together! I gotta run. Catch you later!
Rachel: Yeah, but she also invited you and Ross. Yeah, honey, Im sorry, but I dont think that was a romantic thing.
Joey: Oh. Maybe. But hey I know how I can find out. Were going to a New Years Eve party, right? So at midnight, I can kiss her. And if she kisses me back, great! Yknow? But if she says Dude, what the hell are you doing? I can say It wasnt me, it was New Years!
Rachel: Well, thats a lot better than Ross trying to kiss me in High School, and saying that he did it because he needed chapstick.
[Scene: The Set, Joey, Janine, Ross and Monica are walking in.]
(Monica and Ross push to the front)
Monica and Ross: Scuse us
(He and Monica laugh)
Director: Uh, yeah. Now you guys dance over there, you guys over there, and I want you two right around here, and everyone else spread out.
[Scene: Monica and Chandlers apartment, Chandler is there. Phoebe and Rachel enter.]
Rachel: Dont worry, were just gonna search here for an hour, them were gonna go over to Joeys and search, OK?
Chandler: No, you dont have to, and you cant because I live here too.
Rachel: Chandler, thats not enough. I mean what if she gets you a great present, two medium presents, and a bunch of little presents? And youve just gotten her one great present? I mean thats just gonna make her feel bad. Why would you do that to her Chandler? Why? Why?
(Phoebe tips it upside down, and a shoe falls out)
Chandler: Yknow when you guys said you were gonna go across the hall and look, you dont, you dont do that every year do you?
Chandler: You dont, like go into the back of my closet, and look under my gym bag or anything?
Phoebe and Rachel: No, we never do that
(Camera pans to Joey and Janine)
(She pulls Joey towards her and dances really close to him.)
Joey: No-no hey buddy, please let me dance with that girl, I really like her and I think I have a shot.
(He leaves, and this girl grabs Joey and starts dancing really wild.)
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's apartment, Phoebe and Rachel are there and Chandler enters.]
Phoebe: Yeah, and you have nothing to worry about 'cos they're all crap!
Joey: Hey-hey dancer girl! Can I go to the bathroom? I just.. (The girl starts dancing really close to him, so he picks her up, twirls her round, and puts her against a platform) Here we go. (He walks away to find Monica and Ross doing a really out of place dance) Looking good Gellers!
(Ross and Monica high-five)
Director: Next on the platforms are (He points to the right of Ross and Monica, so they dance over to where hes pointing to. He points away from them) you two! And (He points the other way, and Ross and Monica follow his arm. Again he points away.) You two!
Joey: Yeah, yeah, okay. Uh, look buddy, I came with that girl, and I had this plan to kiss her at the new years countdown Im trying to win her over, so I was wondering if..
Joey: Hey, now youre the one who wet his pants. (He throws another handful on him and runs out)
[Scene: The Set, Monica and Ross are dancing.]
Monica: Man, this sucks! Yknow if Mom and Dad dont see us on TV after we made them so jealous, I mean, whos gonna be the losers then?
Monica: Okay, lets do it. Mom and Dad are gonna be so faced!
(They move into a space, and Ross points to his eyes and then to hers)
Director: Oh no! You get up there and do that again exactly like that!
[Cut to Joey and Janine]
[Cut to Ross and Monica, who are finally on a platform!]
[Scene: Monica and Chandlers apartment, Chandler and Rachel are there, and Phoebe enters with the Chick and the Duck.]
Phoebe: Yknow, birds have a very good sense of direction, and I thought maybe they could help us find where the presents are hidden.
(Rachel sits on the window seat, and knocks against it)
Rachel: This bench, its hollow! I cant believe I never knew that! (She pushes all the pillows off it and opens it up) Oh, the presents!!!
Phoebe: And the big ones for me!
Phoebe and Rachel: Why?
Chandler: I dont wanna know what Monica got me. Yknow? I mean, look, Im sure she worked really hard at getting you a present, and wanting to surprise me, and you guys are gonna ruin that, and I, look we have to put these back, this is not what Christmas is about.
Chandler: Nobody is opening anything ok? Look, I dont know about you guys, but I wanna see the look on Monicas face when I give her my present, and Im sure she wants to see the look on my face when I get mine. So please, please, can we just, can we put them back?
(Monica enters, and they throw the gifts behind them.)
[Scene: Joey and Janines apartment, they both enter.]
Janine: Well, I dont know tonight when they yelled cut and we didnt get to kiss, I was really, really, disappointed, and I just, really wanted to kiss you
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's apartment, everyone except Joey is there.]
Monica: We were on the platform, ready to dance the world into the new Millennium, and the guy yelled CUT!
Monica: I can do it, okay? Come on, lets go. (She and Ross get up)
Monica and Ross: 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8 (Ross runs to be caught by Monica, but she moves out of the way)
(The same woman walks over and takes Rachel's laundry cart.)
Ross: You were incredible! Brand new woman, ladies and gentlemen.
(She thinks it over, and then walks away.)
Ross: Ok, um, uh, more clothes in the dryer? (Ross turns and bangs his head on an open dryer door.) I'm fine, I'm fine.
(Rachel stands up and kisses Ross. He is stunned. A moment of silence follows.)
(Monica and Joey enter.)
Joey: We, we come back from our walk and the- the phone was ringing...
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, everyond except Monica and Joey is watching Lambchop.]
Chandler: Yeah! (Monica falls asleep) No! No! No! Dont fall asleep! Okay, I am going to make you some coffee. (Monica doesnt move as he gets out of bed and as hes heading for the door.) And I probably wont spill coffee grounds all over the kitchen floor.
Chandler: (sighs and gestures to explain) There's a beautiful woman at eight, nine, ten o'clock!
Barry: See, about a month ago, I wanted to hurt you. More than I've ever wanted to hurt anyone in my life. And I'm an orthodontist.
Rachel: And you've got lenses! But you hate sticking your finger in your eye!
Ross: Okay, you're in bed. She's over on your side, cuddling. Now you wait for her to drift off, and then you hug her (demonstrates on the cushion) and roll her back over to her side of the bed. And then you rollll a-way. Hug for her! Roll for you.
Rachel: Yeah, and he does it every year! That's why he's sending you to that play! That's why he sent us to that medieval restaurant and to that button factory!
[Scene: The Theater, the play has ended and everyone is applauding. As soon as the cast leaves, the gang all groan and sit down heavily.]
Chandler: Hey, that's not good. Can I get an espresso and a latte over here, please?
(A flashback of Aurora and Chandler on their date in Central Perk is denoted by italics.)
Phoebe: (reading Monica's palm) No, 'cause this line is passion, and this is... just a line.
Ross: Then, Fred Astaire singing The Way You Look Tonight came on the sound system, and the lights came down. And I got down on one knee and written across the dome in the stars were the words "Will you marry me?"
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Rachel is there as enter except Joey enter.]
ROSS: I don't know, I don't think mom and dad would mind. Remember when you were 9 and Richard was 30, how dad used to say, 'God I hope they get together.'
Ross: Oh yeah, nobody knows. And we're not supposed to ask.
(Joey enters and he's on the phone.)
Rachel: Okay, uh, you let me go grocery shopping, and I buy laundry detergent, but it's not the one with the easy-pour spout.
Chandler: Well, y'know, I had some trouble with it at first too, but the way I look at it is, I get all the good stuff: all the fun, all the talking, all the sex; and none of the responsibility. I mean, this is every guy's fantasy!
(The player shoots and the puck flies off the rink and hits Ross in the face. Chandler looks concered until he notices...)
(Joey enters with Monica's paper and hands it to her.)
Chandler: C'mon, we're roommates! (He goes into the bathroom, screams, and runs back out.) My eyes!! My eyes!!
Ross: Really? You dont think thats a little inappropriate. (Shes wearing a tank top and has her belly sticking out.)
(She opens the door and he leaves.)
Joey: Right. Okay. Losing the robe. (He takes off the robe.) And the robe is lost.
Ross: Uh, well, don't worry, I'll use the gentle cycle. Ok, um, basically you wanna use one machine for all your whites, a whole nother machine for colors, and a third for your uh, your uh, delicates, and that would be your bras and your under-panty things.
Aurora: (moves Chandler's arm and look at his watch.) Oh my God, I'm late. (She starts to get up.)
Aurora: (getting up and dressing) I'm sorry. He'll be waiting for me.
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Aurora and Chandler are in bed in Chandler's room.]
Joey: ...I'm his butt double. 'Kay? I play Al Pacino's butt. Alright? He goes into the shower, and then- I'm his butt.
Aurora: Why can't we just have what we have now? Why can't we just talk, and laugh, and make love, without feeling obligated to one another... and up until tonight I thought that's what you wanted too.
Joey: Nothing! Well, I-I got this blinding pain in my stomach when I was lifting weights before, then I uh passed out and uh, havent been able to stand up since. But um, I dont think its anything serious.
(She leaves, Chandler sighs, and falls back on his bed.)
(She kisses him, he holds her, and kisses her passionately.)
Monica: Youre not gonna go anywhere, you said you were gonna eat here, and youre gonna eat here!
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Ross is trying to comfort Chandler. Joey is absent.]
Joey: Y'know, I've done nothing but crappy plays for six years. And I finally get my shot, and I blow it!
Chandler: Something so sweet and...disturbing about that.
Monica: I think it's a great idea. Yeah, we could have a dinner party and just invite her close friends.
(Ross and Chandler look at each other and hug as well.)
Written by: Jeffrey Astrof and Mike Sikowitz. Transcribed by: Ruth Curran
Monica: (hums for a while, then gives up, and in her head) If it bothers you that much, just go out and get the shoes. No. Don't do this. This is stupid! I don't have to prove anything, I'm gonna go get them...But then everyone will know. Unless I get them, and then wake up really early and put them back! ...I need help! (She buries her head in her pillow.)
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Monica is on the phone with her mother. Phoebe, Rachel, and Ross are there.]
[Scene: The ATM vestibule of a bank, Chandler is inside. The lights go out, and he realizes he is trapped inside.]
Phoebe: Can I borrow the phone? I want to call my apartment and check on my grandma. (to Monica) What's my number?
(Monica and Rachel look at Phoebe strangely.)
Ross: And officiating at tonight's blackout, is Rabbi Tribbiani.
Monica: Noooo! (Comes closer and whispers) I'm lying. I am so drunk.
(Chandler strides proudly across the vestibule and Jill stares at him.)
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, The phone rings; it's Chandler.]
(He continues to smile like an idiot, and she looks frightened.)
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, time has passed. The five are sitting around the coffee table talking.]
MRS. GREENE: Oh well thank you. Such a gentleman. Thank you. [Chandler takes the hot pink coat and grimaces at it] Ahh, it all looks so nice, so festive, all the balloons... [Chandler, remembering that Joey and Mr. Greene are in the bedroom, throws her coat in a cupboard] The funniest thing happened to me on the way here. I was...[Joey peeks out]
Monica: Why dont you just weigh out the good stuff about the relationship against the bad stuff. I mean thats what I did when I first (looks at Chandler and pauses) weighing stuff.
[Time lapse, Ross and Rachel are talking, Joey is on the couch, and Monica and Phoebe are out of the room.]
Chandler: Alright, alright, alright. It's been fourteen and a half minutes and you still have not said one word. Oh God, do something. Just make contact, smile!
Ross: (sarcastically) And you didn't marry him because...?
Phoebe: Umm, well hes very dashing, y'know, and umm, very, very sophisticated, and he doesnt speak any English, but according to his translator, he totally gets me.
Rachel: Oh Ross, you're so great. (she playfully rubs his head and gets up)
Joey: You and Rachel.
Joey: Because you waited too long to make your move, and now you're in the friend zone.
Monica: Mom says it's all of Manhattan, parts of Brooklyn and Queens, and they have no idea when it's coming back on.
(They both start speaking Italian to each other, and since I'm not Italian and don't understand one word, we'll move on to the English portion of the show. Not, that I'm English. Not that there's anything wrong with that, it's just that I'm not. Y'know I think I should shut-up now and move on. Anyhoo, she says something about Joey being fat I think based on this line.)
Phoebe: Oh, this is like the best day ever. Ever! You guys might get back together, Monica and Chandler are getting their baby, there are chicks and ducks in the world again! Oh, I feel like I'm in a musical! (Singing) "Daa - raa... When the sun comes up, bright and beaming! And the moon comes..."
Phoebe: Ooh! Ooh! And I brought Operation! But, um, I lost the tweezers, so we can't operate. But we can prep the guy!
Monica: And that would be?
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's Balcony, Ross and Rachel are talking.]
Monica, Joey, and Phoebe: (singing) I'm on top of the world, looking down on creation and the only explanation I can find, is the wonders I've found ever since...
[Cut to inside. Monica, Joey and Phoebe are singing while outside, Ross and Rachel are trying to get the cat off of Ross' shoulder.]
Chandler: Here's the thing, Janice. You know, I mean, it's like we're different. I'm like the bing, bing, bing. You're like the boom, boom, (Chandler flails his hand out and hits Janice in the eye)... boom.
Rachel: Oh. (they knock at the next door, Mr. Heckles answers) Hi. We just found this cat and we're looking for the owner.
Mr. Heckles: (as Phoebe and Rachel leave) You owe me a cat.
Ross: That, that is funny... (to Joey).... and Rachel keeps touching him.
Rachel: And Joey....
Rachel: And Ross.
Phoebe: Ah! Well! There you go! Last to know again! And I'm guessing... since nobody told me... this is Paolo.
(Chandler tries to save face and makes the 'OK' sign with his hands, while obviously unable to breathe.)
Paolo: (something romantic in Italian about Rachel and the stars)
Rachel: (to Monica and Phoebe) Oh my God, you guys, what am I doing? What am I doing? This is so un-me!
Phoebe: Its a trip for two! (She gets up and takes off her blouse-type thingy shes wearing over her dress.) Excuse me. (She walks over to table four.) Excuse me, is the person who won the Paris trip at this table?
[Scene: The hallway of Monica's building. Phoebe and Rachel are trying to find the cat's owner.]
[Scene: ATM vestibule, Chandler and Jill are sitting below the counter with two pens dangling from their chains in front of them. Jill is showing Chandler how to swing the pen around his head.]
Ross: Listen. Um, listen. Something you should... know... um, Rachel and I... we're kind of a thing.
Ross: Okay, first of all, I dont play with cheaters, and second of all, you know I had swollen glands!!
Chandler: Yes. Yes, thanks for letting me use your phone... and for saving my life.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, the gang is all sitting around the table.]
<Amy gets pissed and starts cutting food on the fancy plate very harshly, you can hear the silveware scraping the fancy plate>
(He swings the pen hard, and it snaps back and almost hits him again.)
(The phone rings and Rachel answers)
Joey: Yeah, they said I acted too much with it. I told everybody about this! Now everybody's gonna go to the theatre, expecting to see me, and...
Ross: No, no, no. Technically the... sex is not... being had, but that's... see, that's not the point. See, um, the point is that... Rachel and I should be, er, together. You know, and if you get in the.... um...
(The lights come back on, and Rachel and Paolo are making out. Ross clutches his chest.)
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, everyone is there.)
Ross: Okay, relax, relax. We are gonna be here for a while, it looks like, and we still have boyfriends and your career to cover.