words in movies
[Scene: Chandler's Office in Tulsa, in the conference room. Chandler's staff/co-workers are sitting round the table; Chandler is walking around, when he notices a piece of paper attached to the back of his chair.]
Chandler: Typical Christmas-y stuff, you know? Our holidays are pretty traditional...
Rachel: We are looking for our Christmas presents from Monica.
[Flashback to 209 - TOW Phoebe's Dad] [Scene: Monica and Rachel's apartment. Joey and Chandler are giving out their Christmas presents out of a cardboard box from a case of motor oil.]
Joey: Rach, these are for you.
Ross: What are you doing here, Santa?
Chandler: Well, I'm here to see my old buddy Ben. What are you doing here, weird...turtle-man?
Ross: (to Chandler) What are you doing?
(All others are looking up, surprised)
(All are leaving, wishing each other a Merry Christmas, peace on earth, etc. Only Wendy stays.)
Wendy: Besides, I can't leave until their Christmas party downstairs clears out; there are some *pissed off* insurance people looking for that ham.
Monica: Ohh, you are such a good boss! Is she pretty?
Chandler: Ah well, she's got this weird idea, that, uh, y'know, just because you and I are alone, that something is gonna happen.
Wendy: You are to me... (She gets closer again, putting her arms around his torso.)
Wendy: Okay, let me ask you something: if what you and your wife have is so great, then why are you spending Christmas with me?
Chandler: You kidding? You're the most beautiful woman in most rooms... (She jumps up and kisses him.) (Breaking the kiss.) Whoa! Whoa! Whoa! What's going on? You and I just made out! You and I are making out?
Chandler: How drunk are you?
Monica: Wow! You are really fast!
[Flashback to 503 - TOW The Triplets] [Scene: A hallway in the hospital, Monica and Chandler are talking.]
Chandler: So, are you really gonna go out with that nurse man?
Monica: Well uh, you and I are just goofing around, I thought, why not just goof around with him.
Monica: I think you're better than you think you are.
[Flashback to 524 - TOI Vegas, Part II] [Scene: The Gift Shop, Monica and Chandler are entering.]
(Surprised, uttering Ahhs and Ohhs, the others are coming over to him.)
Monica: What are you doing here?
Rachel: Wha... are you kidding? I can't return this.
Chandler: Actuary... no. Book-keeper... no. Topless dancer... (he looks down on himself, checking, then nods satisfied and marks the offer with a pen) (to Monica:) Hey, d'you know what I just realized? You are the sole wage earner. *You* are the head of the household. I don't do anything - I'm a kept man!
Monica: You are! (she picks up a bill from the table, handing it to Chandler) Hey, here's twenty bucks. -- Why don't you go buy yourself something pretty while I'm at work tomorrow?
Phoebe: Okay, I cant believe that Monica and Chandler are getting married. I remember talking about this day with Rachel while we were showering together, naked. (Raises her glass and drinks.)
Joey: Whoa! What are you doing here? How did your date go?
Joey: No! No! No Ross! Im not hot! Are you hot?
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Monica, Chandler, Joey, and Phoebe are now sitting in the living room.]
Rachel: So what are you saying; I should run him under hot water and bang his head against a table?
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's erm, Monica and Rachel's, Phoebe and Monica are plugging in a bunch of electronics.]
Rachel: What are you talking about?!
Rachel: So uh, apparently people are familiar with the Europe story?
Rachel: You are undressing very quickly.
[Scene: The Airport Ticket Counter, Monica and Chandler are standing in line behind another couple kissing who are next in line to be served.]
Tim: You are so talented.
Ross: A ferry? My baby is going on a ferry? Do you have any idea how dangerous those are?!
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's, Joey and Ross are having dinner.]
[Scene: Grammercy Bistero, Ross and Kristen are waiting for their table to be ready. Ross is returning from talking to the matired.]
Joey: (confused) Are we watchin the tape or not?!
Monica: Uh well that depends, how are things with Phoebe?
Rachel: Oh you did, there are twenty in here.
Ross: Wow! Uh how are you?
Chandler: (entering) Bob. Bob! Bob!!! (He turns around) What the hell are you doing?!
Monica: So Ross, are you gonna bring Mona?
Rachel: And you are a very funny clown. (Gives him candy.)
[Scene: Phoebes, Frank and her, are sitting on the counh, watching TV]
Monica: What are you supposed to be?
Phoebe: Okay, I will. But right after you tell me who the hell you are.
Phoebe: Okay. (Hands him a napkin.) So, what are you?
Ross: Its not that. Okay? Annulments are more complicated than I
Joey: Are you kiddin? Phoebe lived on the street. Okay? Plus, shes got this crazy temper. SheShes not standing right behind me is she?
Joey: Will you relax?! What are you taking this so seriously for? It doesnt matter.
Phoebe: No Im not! You are!
Rachel: Oh Gunther! You brought candy! Thank you so much for picking this up! You are so sweet.
Phoebe: Why are you lying to him?
Chandler: It's football... It's just football... This is great! This is the first time I've ever enjoyed football... It may be customary to get a beer... (Chandler walks to the fridge, his back turned to the TV and a moaning sound replaces the cheering of the crowd... Joey's eyes double in size...) What the... (Chandler turns around, but Joey already took a sprint for Chandler, jumps, and floors Chandler in the open space in front of the apartment door...) What are you doing?
Monica: Youre wrong! The centerpieces are fine! Do you ever get scared at all?
Ross: Come on, who are we kidding? Im doody. Please? Shes watchin.
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Chandler and Monica are standing in the kitchen.]
Phoebe: Why are you looking at me like that?
Chandler: Oh whats the matter? Are you scared?
Bitter lady: (now yelling) Well, you're not gonna get one! Because in life there are no intermissions, people. Chapter 7: Divorce is a 4 letter word. (Now standing right in front of Chandler and bending down almost to his level as if speaking to him, yelling even louder) How could he leave me?!?!
Monica: What are you guys doing? (Monica hears the moaning coming from the TV and looks at it) Oh my God, is that Richard? (It only takes a split second for Joey to realise, he pulls Monica down by her jacket, and she falls, face down next to Chandler. Chandler gets up a bit, and Joey quickly covers Chandler's eyes with his hand.)
[Scene: Central Perk, Ross, Rachel, and Phoebe are there as someones cell phone starts to ring with one of those fancy ring tones.]
Mrs. Verhoeven's Daughter: Are you close with her?
Monica: (wary) Okay. So, which boxes are mine?
[Scene: Erics Apartment, he and Phoebe are still making out.]
[Scene: Rosss Building, they are approaching the apartment of the woman who died. Ross knocks on the door and a woman answers it.]
Chandler: Are you sure? Did you see the stain?
Rachel: Okay, okay, I checked. We have: Earl Grey, English Breakfast, Cinnamon Stick, Camomile, Mint Medley, Blackberry, and.. oh, wait, there's one more, um.. Lemon Soother. You're not the guy that asked for the tea, are you? (Guy shakes his head) Okay.
Brenda: (noticing him) What are you doing?
Rachel: Are you seriousReally?! Its in such good condition.
Rachel: Joey, are you sure?
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's, Joey and Rachel are toasting her staying put.]
[Scene: Central Perk, Joey, Monica, and Chandler are sitting on the couch and chair as Phoebe is getting coffee.]
[Scene: A Restaurant, Rachel and Phoebe are having dinner with Dr. Green, and everyone is looking at the menu.]
Dr. Green: Are you really pregnant?
[Scene: Central Perk, Chandler and Joey are reading a magazine and Ross is chatting with Mona.]
[Scene: The Restaurant, dinner has ended and Phoebe and Rachel are talking. Dr. Green is not at the table.]
Rachel: Theres not gonna be a wedding. Ross and I are not getting married.
Chandler: What are you doing?
[Scene: Ross's Apartment, Ross and Mona are sitting on the couch.]
(They start wrestling, only they are unable to move either ones arm despite a huge strain on their faces and a cheering crowd.)
Chandler: Could be. I mean technically she did strip, we just, we just missed it. (Walks towards the bedroom.) Maam, are you also a stripper?
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Joey and Chandler are still deciding what to do about the hooker.]
Monica: Oh my God Stu! I-I cant believe you did this! Now are you absolutely sure shes a hooker?
Chandler: Well yknow, things are different. Im Im married now.
Minister: Friends. Family. We are gathered to celebrate here today the joyous union of Ross and Emily. (Time lapse) Now Ross, repeat after me. I Ross...
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's, Rachel and Phoebe are at the counter as Ross enters.]
Rachel: Okay. Um ButOkay, yes Ross and I used to date. And yes we are gonna have a baby. But we are definitely not getting back together.
Monica: Ooh, these tennis shoes are so tight. I think Ill take them off. (Goes to do so.)
Chandler: (closing the box) Yknow what? Forget it! We are just hungry! We have not had lunch! We are just light-headed! So let us go out and have lunch and forget about the cheesecake.
[Time Lapse: the crowd has left and only Mona, Monica, Joey, and Phoebe are still watching to see who will be able to move the others arm first. An event that has yet to happen.]
Rachel: Oh Pheebs thats so sweet(Grabs a pair of pants)Ooh, those are so cute!
Rachel: Wow! I dont remember him. Honey, are you sure youre not talking about your imaginary boyfriend.
Phoebe: Turkeys are beautiful, intelligent animals!
Ross: Yeah. The bartender said that they split up into two search parties, the herbivores and the carnivores. (pause) You know, we as a group are not the coolest.
Monica: Hey, what are you doing? You gotta save room, youve got almost an entire turkey to eat.
Ross: So how long are you in town?
Will: You are unbelievable.
Joey: You got it. Come here. (They hug and are observed by the hooker.)
Joey: You are my Everest.
Dr. Green: 74?! I ordered the 75! Thats a magnificent wine! The 74 is sewage! Why would you bring me sewage?! (The waiters dumbfounded) Is that a hard question? Are you an idiot? Is that why youre a waiter?
Will: Are ya getting married?
Ross: Yeah. I mean we are having a baby together.
Phoebe: Joey! Those are my maternity pants!
Joey: Not now! These are my Thanksgiving pants!
[Scene: Mike's parents house. Dining room again. Both Mike and Phoebe are not at the table, but the others still are.]
Monica: (on phone) Hey listen umm, how would you like to get together? Say next Saturday? (Listens) Okay, how about Sunday? (Listens) Okay umm, the week after that? (Listens) The week after that? (Listens) Yknow what Greg? Yknow what? We are good, interesting, funny people with good questions and if you and your precious Jenny cant see that then (Listens) January 15th? (Chandler dances.) Well see you then! (Listens) Okay!
Monica: Im sorry, they just, they just look so good! And the saleswoman was looking at me like, "Oh, these are way too expensive for you."
Rachel: Oh my God! (Notices the boots) Oh Monica! Those boots are amazing!
[Scene: Central Perk, Phoebe, Ross, and Rachel are sitting on the couch and Ross is talking to Rachels, who is now showing, stomach.]
Phoebe: There you go! Oh, you are so lucky! You might actually get to meet Sting tomorrow! Thats why you have kids!
[Scene: Central Perk, the next day Rachel, Phoebe, and Chandler are there as Monica enters.]
Joey: Absolutely! Halloween is the worst. Except for Christmas and their birthdays. Kinda get a little crazy during the summer too. And anytime theyre hungry or sleepy. Yknow, kids are tough. Good luck with that. (Walks away.)
[Cut to later in that episode. Monica and Chandler are confronting Joey in his apartment about Phoebes knowledge.]
Dina: I I dont care about fashion! Im pregnant! And I know you are too, so you gotta help me!
Dina: Joe, mom and dad are fine
Ben: Aunt Phoebe, what are you doing here?
Dina: Why? Where are you going?
Phoebe: Oh, there you are Ben!
The Teacher: Are you one of Bens mothers?
The Teacher: Are you with one of the students?
[Scene: A Street, Chandler and Monica are walking down the sidewalk after his office holiday party.]