words in movies
Ross: Uh, before we do uh, are any of Joeys special romance magazines in there?
Ross: Okay. (Ben enters) Ben? Come here. All right, Im gonna leave you here with Aunt Rachel for about an hour. Okay? Are you gonna be okay?
[Scene: Central Perk, Monica and Chandler are talking. Joey and Phoebe are getting coffee.]
Monica: Are you serious?
Chandler: We are going to have a legitimate member of the clergy! And when I say legitimate I mean, gay and in control of his saliva!
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's, Rachel and Ben are sitting on the couch bored out of their minds.]
Rachel: Hey! We were not on aOkay. Thats fine! Fine. Yknow what Ben? One day when you are a lot older I am going to tell you that entire story over a pitcher of real margaritas, okay?
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Monica and Chandler are eating lunch as Joey enters.]
[Scene: Central Perk, Phoebe, Chandler, and Monica are there.]
Phoebe: Its amazing! My headache is completely gone! What are those pills called?
Monica: No Phoebe, those are like the side affects and stuff.
Joey: Now-now, listen this is just a first draft so (Starts to read the piece of paper he brought.) "We are gathered here today on this joyous occasion to celebrate the special love that Monica and Chandler share." (Monica and Chandler like it so far.) Eh? (He continues reading.) "It is a love based on giving and receiving. As well as having and sharing. And the love that they give and have is shared and received. And through this having and giving and sharing and receiving." (Phoebe nods her approval.) "We too can share and love and have and receive."
Carol: What a nice surprise! What are you doing here?
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Phoebe, Joey, Chandler, and Monica are returning from Central Perk.]
Joey: Okay you guys, I got a little more written. Are you ready?
Chandler: Well, last time I saw him he was heading out the door with the brides maid and a bucket of strawberries. So uh, youre not still upset about what that guy told ya are ya?
Chandler: You kidding? Youre the most beautiful woman in most rooms (She jumps up and kisses him.) (Breaking the kiss.) Whoa! Whoa! Whoa! Whats going on? You and I just made out! You and I are making out?
Chandler: How drunk are you?
Monica: Wow! You are really fast!
Joey: Hey no-no-no-no! Its cool! Its cool! I-Ill only be a second, Im still with my brides maid, I justWhere are those condoms you brought?
Joey: What?! Thats not fair! Its not my fault! I was off with my brides maid! And whos to say I wouldve even said yes?! (To Monica) I mean I wouldve said yes. Chandler look y-y-you are making way to big a deal out of this, all right? Look, everything worked out okay!
Ross: Rachel! What are you doing here?
Rachel: Okay, maybe they are not funny to you
Joey: Yeah for like a half an hour one night! Chandler, she wants you for the rest of her life! Youre so lucky! Look what I missed out on by not being there! Although you know what? It could never have worked like you guys did, cause you guys are perfect for each other. Yknow, we look at you and-and we see you together and it just it-it fits. Yknow? And you just know its gonna last forever.
Chandler: But those are the words! Those exact words!
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's, Rachel is in the kitchen as Ross and Ben are entering.]
Ross: All right, thats it! (He runs over to Ben, but he runs past him and out the door.) Comeyouno! You are in big trouble young man!
[Scene: Central Perk, Chandler and Monica are entering. Phoebe and Joey are sitting on the couch.]
Joey: So are guys doing okay?
Chandler: Yeah, we talked and Monica made me see that I over reacted a little bit and some things in life are more important.
Phoebe: Im really glad you guys are okay but, I just keep thinking what would happen if-if you two (Points to Monica and Joey) actually had hooked up.
Dina: I I dont care about fashion! Im pregnant! And I know you are too, so you gotta help me!
Dina: Joe, mom and dad are fine
Ben: Aunt Phoebe, what are you doing here?
Dina: Why? Where are you going?
Phoebe: Oh, there you are Ben!
The Teacher: Are you one of Bens mothers?
The Teacher: Are you with one of the students?
[Scene: A Street, Chandler and Monica are walking down the sidewalk after his office holiday party.]
Rachel: Joey, what are you doing?
Monica: Well I dont have them either. Where are they?
Chandler: Honey, are you seriously ever gonna wear the boots again?
Mike: All right, stop! You know, all Phoebe has done tonight is trying to get you to like her. And maybe that hasn't been clear all the time, but she did her best. And yeah... She's a little different than you are...
Rachel: Youre supposed to realize that they are adults! And that they can make their own decisions.
Phoebe: Oo, where are the seats?
Phoebe: Ninety percent of a womens pheromones come out the top of her head! Thats why, thats why women are shorter. So that men will fall in love when they hug them! (Ross is staring at her dumbfounded.) Oh come on Ross, youre a scientist.
[Scene: Central Perk, Phoebe and Ross are there.]
The Teacher: Right. Are you looking for Jacks parents to discuss the problems hes having with Ben? (Phoebe nods Yes.) Yeah. Because I really do think the parents should sit down and have a conversation.
[Scene: Central Perk, Joey and Ross are there as Mona enters.]
Ross: Hey where-where are the pictures that creepy pretzel vendor took of us together?
Mona: Where are we?
Mona: Yknow, like where are we? Where is this relationship going?
Rachel: Yes, you are.
Joey: Oh. Are you sure you don't want to come? Tom Hanks, Meg Ryan, they get mail and stuff.
[Scene: Central Perk, Monica and Phoebe are there as Rachel enters.]
Dr. Green: Well what if somebody steals something? How are you gonna run after him with one leg shorter than the other?!
Rachel: Oh hey! Hey Ross! Hey hows it, hows it going with you and Mona? Are you guys still together?
Ross: Forget it. I-IYknow what? Ill just have the conversation. Ill just say I like things the way they are, and hope for the best. What do you think Rach?
Phoebe: (singing) ...fuchsia and mauvvve. Those are the 66 colours of my bedroommmm. (applause) Thank you, thank you. Ohh, and I invite you to count the colours in your bedroom. (Sees that Phoebe Sr. has entered, and to her) Except for you. You go away.
Mona: Im sorry, so umm, so where are we?
Ross: Aw, we-we are so (Motions that theyre connected.) So umm, well I-I-I like you and I-I love umm, yknow hanging out with you. And I mean-Im having a lot of fun. (He pauses and thinks there might be more, but decides there isnt.)
[Scene: Ross and Rachel's. Emma is in her bed and Ross and Rachel are rapping and dancing for her.]
Ross: I mean, theres no point in spending time with someone if-if its just fun. Its gotta be, its gotta be going somewhere right? So where-where is it going? (Pause) Ah! Thats-thats the real question. And-and the answer is is its going somewhere fun. Now I-I know what youre thinking, fun was fine for you like ten years ago yknow, but youre-youre not getting any younger. No I meanNo not you, not you, youyou are getting younger. I meanyou-you look like youre getting younger by the secondWhats your secret?
Ross: Hey! I did not dump Rachel! (To Mona) Nor are we still together. (The phone rings and Ross goes to answer it, only hes trapped behind the apothecary table by Dr. Green.) Can I just (Dr. Green glares at him.) Why dont we just let the machine get that?
Rachel: No! I do not care what my hormones are doing, I am not going to just do it with some random guy!
[Scene: Central Perk, Chandler, Rachel, Ross, Joey, and Phoebe are there waiting for Chandler's cyberchick to arrive]
Rachel: Oh, really, really good. But enough about me, come on! Where-where are you from? What do you do?
Dr. Schiff: So, are you experiencing any discomfort?
Monica: Are you kidding?! I practically spent my entire childhood at the arcade! This is likeOh my, this is like my second favorite game!
Ross: Hey! Oh, Im so glad you guys are here. Ive been dying to tell someone what happened in the Paleontology department today.
[Scene: Central Perk, Joey and Rachel are there as Ross enters.]
Joey: You sure are naming a lot of ways to postpone sex, Ill tell ya
Dr. Harad: Oh, no-no-no, it's a good one! Fonzie plays the bongos. All right, are you ready? It's time to start pushing.
Joey: No, Im picking you up for our date. These are for you. (Hands her some flowers.)
Joey: No-no-no-no, hes not! No! Why are you trying to ruin the game? Come on!
Chandler: You are not going to believe what I did today!
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's, Joey and Rachel are returning from their date.]
Rachel: No one! They are my friends, I wouldnt punch any of them.
Rachel: So tell me, what are Joey Tribbianis end of the night moves?
Phoebe: Okay! I justI didnt know that you are a lesbian. (Joey smiles and nods lewdly.)
Monica: Hey. Oh good-good youre here! All right, I figured it out. Im gonna take two tables of eight, Im gonna add your parents, and Im gonna turn them into three tables of six. Okay? And I called the caterer; I added two extra meals, we are good to go!
Joey's Date: Hey. Are you all right? You seem a little distracted.
Rachel: No! No! Seriously, whats wrong with the dog?! Wait a minute, what are you doing home so early? What happened to your date?
Rachel: Yknow, I never thought Id say this about a movie, but I really hope this dog dies. (Joey brings over a stool at sits on it next to Rachel whos in the big chair.) What are you doing over there? Come sit here, you protect me.
Chandler: Who are you? Ansel Adams?! Get outta here!
Chandler: Are you, are you high?
Phoebe: Hey, are you going to find out the sex of the baby?
[Scene: Central Perk, Phoebe and Rachel are sitting on the couch. Ross sits down.]
Phoebe: Are you two talking about the same baby? Hey! Have you started off thinking of names yet?
Monica: No, but someones really not going to get over that idea, are they?
Ross: (Back to Emma) Hi! (Looks at her) What... (Moves the stroller away from him so he can get a better look at her. He looks at her confused. Finally he realizes the difference and gasps). Please tell me those are clip-ons.
Dr. Long: Okay! All your tests look fine. Now, are you two interested in knowing the sex of the baby?
Monica: All right fine. Fine, Ill do it. Ive just got to get this off the screen. Carol and Susan are still upset that you taught him pull my finger.
Mike: The woman I love... (he walks to Phoebe) I love you... Which is probably something I shouldn't say for the first time in front of my parents... and Tom and Sue...Who are by the way the most sinfully boring I've ever met in my life...
Chandler: What are you going to do?
Joey: (entering the bathroom) What are you guys doing in here?
Rachel: (entering) Hey! Ross and I were looking for you! What are we all doing in here? (Looks at Chandler) Oh, my! (Covers the spot where Joey wants bubbles to be replaced.)
[Scene: Chandler and Monicas bathroom. Both are sitting on opposite ends of the bathtub.]
Phoebe: Oh are you and Chandler
<Ross and Rachel are putting baby stuff together like they're going to be going somewhere.>
Monica: Y'know, so I don't read as many important books as you do, and I don't write trick poems that seem to be about one thing but are actually about something else. And y'know what, I get excited about stupid stuff, like when I my People magazine comes on Saturday, and the new Hold Everything catalog. Y'know but that does not mean that I'm empty, I care about things. I care about my friends and family. You have no right to make that kind of judgment about me.
[Scene: Central Perk, Joey and Rachel are there as Ross enters.]
Chandler: Okay, okay, but dont worry, because we also have cereals, muffins, waffles, and, jams, jellies, and marmalades. Which Im fairly certain are the same thing.
Monica: Nice! Wow Phoebe you are good!
Ross: A lot of people are thankful for those. < knock on door>
Phoebe: (calling from her room) Are you under the sheet?
Joey: Whoa, Monica runs a pretty tight ship over here. What are you doing?
Joey: Ah, just cut me a little sliver. (Monica prepares to cut a little sliver.) A little bigger. (Monica prepares to cut a bigger piece.) Little bigger. (Monica moves the knife again.) What?! Are you afraid youre gonna run out?! Cut me a real piece!
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Joey and Chandler are still working on the door.]
Rachel: You are not. You have never been able to break up with her.
Dr. Long: No-no. Contractions can be unnerving if you dont know what they are, but shes fine.
Phoebe: Really? Theres nothing sexual about this? (Sexily) Oooh. Oo God! Ohh. Ohhhh. Ohh. (Some cute guy is watching closely.) (To him) What are you looking at?! (Pause) I mean hi.
Monica: Are you sure?
Ross: (to Rachel) I-Im sorry Rach, I didnt know. Are you gonna be okay?
Rachel: Are you asking me to move out? Do you not want me here?
Rachel: (Gasps) Are you breaking up with us?
Joey: Are you kidding me? Im great! Yeah, Im uh; Im better than great. I am good. And now that shes gone, I can uh, I can do all this stuff around here that I couldnt do before. Yknow? Like umm, I can walk around naked again. Yknow? I can uh, I can watch porn in the living room. Right? This is uh, this is good for me. Yknow? I like being on my own, Im uh, better off this way. Im uh, a lone wolf. Yknow? A loner. Alone. All alone. Forever. Whats a wolf got to do to get a huh around here?! (Chandler rushes over and hugs him.)
Chandler: Good morning everyone, it�s nice to see our team together for the first time. Now, before we get started, are there any questions? (colleague raises hand) Yes, Ken is it?
Chandler: Are you okay?
Chandler: So Rachels all moved out huh? How are you taking it?
Rachel: Oh! Im sorry! Are we having an 89-year-old? How about Dayton?
[Scene: Monica and Chandlers. Phoebe and Ross are sitting in the living room talking.]
Joey: Thanks so much, Pheebs! (to the dog) We are going to have so much fun, yes we are! (the dog sticks his head between Joeys legs) Oh! Not that kind of fun.
[Scene: Central Perk. Ross and Phoebe are sitting on the couch.]
Amy: Not really. But you are much cuter then that geeky guy she used to date.
Ross: (opening the door to see Mona standing there) Mona? What arehi! What are you doing here? Im, um, supposed to pick you up!
Mona: Oh, Rachel! Wait! Hey, I hope you dont take this the wrong way, but, but, um what are you doing?
[Scene: Monica and Chandlers. Monica and Chandler are sitting on the couch still staring at the screen.]
Joey: I guess I'm going to have to come up with a really good reason why I wasn't there. The producers are going to be so mad at me. They sat us all down yesterday and said "Everyone has to be there at 6:00 AM sharp, that means you Tribbiani." Like.. like I was some kind of idiot.
Ross: Yeah. Wait a minute. What are you doing here? Joey Tribbiani without a date on Valentines Day? Whats going on, huh? Girl trouble?
Monica: Oh, well... um, that's all there are of these. But in about eight and a half minutes, we'll be serving some delicious onion tartlets.