words in movies
Ross: Uh, before we do uh, are any of Joeys special romance magazines in there?
Ross: Okay. (Ben enters) Ben? Come here. All right, Im gonna leave you here with Aunt Rachel for about an hour. Okay? Are you gonna be okay?
[Scene: Central Perk, Monica and Chandler are talking. Joey and Phoebe are getting coffee.]
Monica: Are you serious?
Chandler: We are going to have a legitimate member of the clergy! And when I say legitimate I mean, gay and in control of his saliva!
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's, Rachel and Ben are sitting on the couch bored out of their minds.]
Rachel: Hey! We were not on aOkay. Thats fine! Fine. Yknow what Ben? One day when you are a lot older I am going to tell you that entire story over a pitcher of real margaritas, okay?
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Monica and Chandler are eating lunch as Joey enters.]
[Scene: Central Perk, Phoebe, Chandler, and Monica are there.]
Phoebe: Its amazing! My headache is completely gone! What are those pills called?
Monica: No Phoebe, those are like the side affects and stuff.
Joey: Now-now, listen this is just a first draft so (Starts to read the piece of paper he brought.) "We are gathered here today on this joyous occasion to celebrate the special love that Monica and Chandler share." (Monica and Chandler like it so far.) Eh? (He continues reading.) "It is a love based on giving and receiving. As well as having and sharing. And the love that they give and have is shared and received. And through this having and giving and sharing and receiving." (Phoebe nods her approval.) "We too can share and love and have and receive."
Carol: What a nice surprise! What are you doing here?
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Phoebe, Joey, Chandler, and Monica are returning from Central Perk.]
Joey: Okay you guys, I got a little more written. Are you ready?
Chandler: Well, last time I saw him he was heading out the door with the brides maid and a bucket of strawberries. So uh, youre not still upset about what that guy told ya are ya?
Chandler: You kidding? Youre the most beautiful woman in most rooms (She jumps up and kisses him.) (Breaking the kiss.) Whoa! Whoa! Whoa! Whats going on? You and I just made out! You and I are making out?
Chandler: How drunk are you?
Monica: Wow! You are really fast!
Joey: Hey no-no-no-no! Its cool! Its cool! I-Ill only be a second, Im still with my brides maid, I justWhere are those condoms you brought?
Joey: What?! Thats not fair! Its not my fault! I was off with my brides maid! And whos to say I wouldve even said yes?! (To Monica) I mean I wouldve said yes. Chandler look y-y-you are making way to big a deal out of this, all right? Look, everything worked out okay!
Ross: Rachel! What are you doing here?
Rachel: Okay, maybe they are not funny to you
Joey: Yeah for like a half an hour one night! Chandler, she wants you for the rest of her life! Youre so lucky! Look what I missed out on by not being there! Although you know what? It could never have worked like you guys did, cause you guys are perfect for each other. Yknow, we look at you and-and we see you together and it just it-it fits. Yknow? And you just know its gonna last forever.
Chandler: But those are the words! Those exact words!
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's, Rachel is in the kitchen as Ross and Ben are entering.]
Ross: All right, thats it! (He runs over to Ben, but he runs past him and out the door.) Comeyouno! You are in big trouble young man!
[Scene: Central Perk, Chandler and Monica are entering. Phoebe and Joey are sitting on the couch.]
Joey: So are guys doing okay?
Chandler: Yeah, we talked and Monica made me see that I over reacted a little bit and some things in life are more important.
Phoebe: Im really glad you guys are okay but, I just keep thinking what would happen if-if you two (Points to Monica and Joey) actually had hooked up.
Monica: No! No-no theyre not. Theyre still very angry! But yknow Chandler is also half-Swedish. You know what the Swedish people are famous for? Sitting down and being quiet.
Ross: Are ya?
Ross: What are you doing up?
[Scene: The Baby Furniture Store, Ross and Rachel are checking out.]
Phoebe: Is that a real place? (Rachels stunned) Are they hiring?
Chandler: Are you serious?!
[Scene: The New School, Monica, carrying her dish, and Joey are confronting the food critic.]
Katie: Are you okay with this?
Monica: Ok people, we are back in business! (Gets her headset out of her purse) Oh God, we've missed you soo much! (takes all the notes from Phoebe) Ok, go and get your hair and make-up done, and I'll take care of everything.
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Chandler and Phoebe are entering.]
Phoebe: Oh! Its okay, you calm down after a while and then people can see how really sweet and wonderful you really are.
The Cooking Teacher: Okay Joey, youre up next. (Tries one of his cookies.) This are good! This is amazing! You get an A!
[Scene: Ross and Rachel's, Ross and Rachel are unpacking and setting up their new purchases.]
Ross: Look at you! WhatYoure-youre this big executive! You are much more capable than you give yourself credit for. I-I have no doubt youre gonna be an incredible mother.
Ross: How are you?
Ross: (laughs) Why? What, what are you jealous?
[Scene: The New School, Joey and Monica are walking down a hallway.]
Ross: Hey! What are you guys looking at?
Monica: Are we gonna take a limo?
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Phoebe, Chandler, Joey, and Monica are there as Rachel enters.]
Monica: What are you doing here so early?
Phoebe: Oh hey Mon? Rach is here! Ohh, youre still pregnant. Oh, Im sorry. I know how uncomfortable you are. Yknow what? You look great. Yeah, like fifty bucks.
[Scene: Dr. Longs Office, Ross and Rachel are waiting for the doctor. Ross is drumming his fingers on the bed.]
Rachel: Hi Dr. Long, how are you?
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Chandler, Ross. Joey, and Rachel are eating breakfast. Chandler is holding a bottle of Herseys Syrup.]
Dr. Long: Actually, theyre things you can do. Just some home remedies, but in my experience Ive found that some of them are quite effective.
Rachel: Well, we are ready to try anything.
[Scene: Central Perk, Ross and Rachel are there as Phoebe and Monica enter.]
(There are scratching and squeaking noises coming from the living room, and Joey wakes up, terrified. He pulls his blanket higher. The doorknob is turning.)
Rachel: Oh come on Ross, why are we wasting our time with this other stuff?! We know whats gonna work! Its doctor recommended!
Phoebe looks down: You are a terrific actor.
Monica: How are you doing?
Nurse: Im sorry. Semi-private rooms are all we have.
Rachel: How are you?
Julie: Yeah, we are going to share every moment of this with you. And I think were gonna have some fun.
Monica: What?! Are you kidding me?! You-you-you think were ready to have a baby now?!
Joey: (voice all high and weird) What?! Are you crazy?!
(Joey says nothing, but enters the room and kisses her. They are kissing passionately only to stop for a brief "oh" from Rachel. They continue their passionate kiss and Joey closes the door with his foot and it shuts in the camera's "face". And that's the end of the ninth season.)
Ross: Are you kidding? Look, were not gonna be together just because were having a baby. Okay?
Ross: Wow! Sorry. So uh, how are the new people?
Evil Bitch: Are you looking at her?!
Monica: What is going on with you? Since when are you so crazy about babies?
Monica: We are pretty good.
Monica: So were gonna try? I mean, are we trying?
[Scene: Another Waiting Room, Phoebe and Joey are trying to find out where the guy with the broken leg is.]
Joey: Okay. And uh, are you married.
Cliff: Are all the questions this personal?
Joey: Well, I'm sorry if I'm not a middle-aged black woman! (Starts for his room.) And I'm also sorry if sometimes I go to the wrong audition! Okay, look, if I have to pretend I don't know about you two, then you two are gonna have to pretend there's nothing to know about.
[Scene: The Semi-Private Labor Room, Chandler and Monica are entering to see if they in fact did hear Janice.]
Monica: I cant believe this is taking so long. How are you doing?
Rachel: Are you okay?
Ross: Well then wed be in a lot of trouble, you dont know where any countries are. (Rachel glares at him.) Okay. (He goes over to the desk followed by Rachel.) Uh, say would you umm Would you mind checking again to see if any umm, private rooms may have (Handing her some money) opened up?
Rachel: Well what are we going to do?
Ross: Ugh, easy for you to say, you already know what your kids names are going to be.
Rachel: Well tell us! What are they?
Ross: Oh, Im actually on my way to tell her right now. Yeah, shes been away all week visiting her parents, but shell be cool. I mean, shes been so supportive. She-she even got the baby a tiny T-shirt that says, Fossils are my friends.
Janice: I hate to be the one to say it, but honey you two (Her and Emma) are on your own.
Phoebe: Im sorry, for the last time, why arent you two together again? (Silence from Ross.) No, I know. I know, because youre not in that place. Which would be fine, except you totally are.
Ross: Oh what are you kidding? Shes gorgeous, its all Rachel.
Joey: What are you talking about alone? What about Ross?
Joey: Hey, listen to me, listen to me you are never ever gonna be alone. Okay? I promise thats not gonna happen.
Chandler: Okay, here is the thing. We have thrown a very formal surprise party for you in there! All of your friends are in there and your parents!
[Scene: Ross and Rachel's, Ross and Rachel are trying the home remedies again.]
Phoebe: To see if know what these guys are talking about.
Rachel: No! You gotta get me out of here Phoebe! These bargain shoppers are crazy!
Chandler: As we all are at some point during the day.
Mrs. Geller: Can we talk to you for just a yknow Its just a little thing. Well we think its absolutely marvelous that youre having this baby out of wedlock, some of our friends are less open-minded. Which is why weve told them all that youre married.
Phoebe: Are you kidding? Im like the one who talked him into it. I like to think of myself as the puppet master of the group.
Phoebe: Are you all right?
Ross: I wanna go talk to Rachel for a minute, are you gonna be okay alone for a bit?
Mr. Geller: Are you kidding me, I could stay and look at her forever.
Phoebe: Why?! You two are so meant to be together, everybody thinks so.
Mr. Geller: I think there are people in there having sex.
Ross: Dad, what are you doing?
(Ross and Rachel are, needless to say, stunned at the arrival of Janice.)
Joey: (To God) Are you kidding me?!
Rachel: Oh look, shes pulling away again! Do you think my nipples are too big for her mouth? (Joey gets embarrassed.) She looks scared. Doesnt she look scared?
Phoebe: No! No, that you and Rachel are engaged!
Phoebe: Are you lying? Is this like that time you tried to convince us that you were a doctor?
Phoebe: Perhaps because you gave her an engagement ring? Yknow Ross doctors are supposed to be smart.
[Scene: The Janitors Closet, Chandler and Monica are trying to figure out what to do now.]
Monica: What?! Are you crazy? You just had Rosss baby! Its-its so inappropriate. No, its worse than that. Its wrong. Its It is bigger than mine! (Rachels engagement ring.)
Rachel: We really are.
Monica: Ok, I dont wanna be negative so Ill say that most of the signs you bought are good.
[Scene: Ross and Rachels, Monica, Phoebe, Joey and Chandler are waiting for Ross and Rachel to come home and Monica is looking at the sign Phoebe bought that says, "Its a Boy!"]
[Scene: The Airport, Carol and Ross are waiting for Emily and Susan to deplane. A gorgeous woman walks by and they both turn to watch her go.]
[Scene: Ross and Rachels, Phoebe, Monica, Ross, and Rachel are watching Emma sleep.]
Ms. McKenna: Are you on board?
[Scene: A restaurant, Chandler, Monica, Phoebe, and Gary are on a double date. Chandler is yawning.]
Monica: Are you trying to tell me that were moving to Oklahoma, or that youre gay? All right, not that this matters, but did they at least offer you a huge raise?
Chandler: No, no, but they are going to lease us a Ford Focus. (Monicas not impressed.) Ill get out of it.
Ross: I dont think that we are.
Joey: Come on, you guys are more then that! I mean, youre gonna get together right?
[Scene: Central Perk, Joey and Ross are sitting at one of the high tables.]
Ross: (disinterested) Hey-yeah. (He hurries up to the counter.) Hey Gunther, can I have a scone please? (To the gang.) Wanna hear some good news? Someone I know is getting married! Yeah! And weddings are happy occasions! Oh, by-the-by it's my ex-wife Emily!
Joey: I can't believe you guys are moving.
Joey: Here you are (Hands Rachel a cup of coffee)
Chandler: I'm sorry, are you just used to saying that?
Rachel: It's impossible to find a good doctor. I mean, how do you know the good ones from the ones who are gonna push their penis against your knee?
Rachel: Because (laughs), because, I just heard it. I heard it, and it's ridiculous! I mean, you're married. You're-you're married and it's just ridiculous, and it's like, it's like when said it, I sort of like, I floated up out of my body, y'know? And, and-and then I heard myself say it and then the floating Rachel (laughs) was like, "You are such an idiot!"