words in movies
Ross: Uh, before we do uh, are any of Joeys special romance magazines in there?
Ross: Okay. (Ben enters) Ben? Come here. All right, Im gonna leave you here with Aunt Rachel for about an hour. Okay? Are you gonna be okay?
[Scene: Central Perk, Monica and Chandler are talking. Joey and Phoebe are getting coffee.]
Monica: Are you serious?
Chandler: We are going to have a legitimate member of the clergy! And when I say legitimate I mean, gay and in control of his saliva!
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's, Rachel and Ben are sitting on the couch bored out of their minds.]
Rachel: Hey! We were not on aOkay. Thats fine! Fine. Yknow what Ben? One day when you are a lot older I am going to tell you that entire story over a pitcher of real margaritas, okay?
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Monica and Chandler are eating lunch as Joey enters.]
[Scene: Central Perk, Phoebe, Chandler, and Monica are there.]
Phoebe: Its amazing! My headache is completely gone! What are those pills called?
Monica: No Phoebe, those are like the side affects and stuff.
Joey: Now-now, listen this is just a first draft so (Starts to read the piece of paper he brought.) "We are gathered here today on this joyous occasion to celebrate the special love that Monica and Chandler share." (Monica and Chandler like it so far.) Eh? (He continues reading.) "It is a love based on giving and receiving. As well as having and sharing. And the love that they give and have is shared and received. And through this having and giving and sharing and receiving." (Phoebe nods her approval.) "We too can share and love and have and receive."
Carol: What a nice surprise! What are you doing here?
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Phoebe, Joey, Chandler, and Monica are returning from Central Perk.]
Joey: Okay you guys, I got a little more written. Are you ready?
Chandler: Well, last time I saw him he was heading out the door with the brides maid and a bucket of strawberries. So uh, youre not still upset about what that guy told ya are ya?
Chandler: You kidding? Youre the most beautiful woman in most rooms (She jumps up and kisses him.) (Breaking the kiss.) Whoa! Whoa! Whoa! Whats going on? You and I just made out! You and I are making out?
Chandler: How drunk are you?
Monica: Wow! You are really fast!
Joey: Hey no-no-no-no! Its cool! Its cool! I-Ill only be a second, Im still with my brides maid, I justWhere are those condoms you brought?
Joey: What?! Thats not fair! Its not my fault! I was off with my brides maid! And whos to say I wouldve even said yes?! (To Monica) I mean I wouldve said yes. Chandler look y-y-you are making way to big a deal out of this, all right? Look, everything worked out okay!
Ross: Rachel! What are you doing here?
Rachel: Okay, maybe they are not funny to you
Joey: Yeah for like a half an hour one night! Chandler, she wants you for the rest of her life! Youre so lucky! Look what I missed out on by not being there! Although you know what? It could never have worked like you guys did, cause you guys are perfect for each other. Yknow, we look at you and-and we see you together and it just it-it fits. Yknow? And you just know its gonna last forever.
Chandler: But those are the words! Those exact words!
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's, Rachel is in the kitchen as Ross and Ben are entering.]
Ross: All right, thats it! (He runs over to Ben, but he runs past him and out the door.) Comeyouno! You are in big trouble young man!
[Scene: Central Perk, Chandler and Monica are entering. Phoebe and Joey are sitting on the couch.]
Joey: So are guys doing okay?
Chandler: Yeah, we talked and Monica made me see that I over reacted a little bit and some things in life are more important.
Phoebe: Im really glad you guys are okay but, I just keep thinking what would happen if-if you two (Points to Monica and Joey) actually had hooked up.
Joey: I'm telling ya... (his eyes open wide and he looks like his eyes are about to pop out. He stares at Ross like this without blinking) I can do it.
The Vendor: So, what are you guys in the market for? Weve got uh, scarves, tulip post cards...
Joey: No, no. He said "When are you gonna grow up and start being a mom?"
(They almost kiss and then Joey realises her kids are staring at them)
Joey: Why, are you moving out?
Phoebe: Oh, Paolo, hi, what are you doing here?
Rachel: I mean, we are way past the fling thing, I mean, I am feeling things that I've only read about in Danielle Steele books, you know? I mean, when I'm with him, I'm totally, totally...
...My mother's ashes Even her eyelashes Are resting in a little yellow jar, And sometimes when it's breezy...
Monica: Are you sure?
Chandler: So what are you gonna do?
Phoebe: Are you moving out?
Rachel: All right, well, you're right, these are the best oatmeal cookies I've ever had.
Phoebe: Are you okay?
Phoebe: No, wait, oh, what are we sorry about?
[Scene: Central Perk, Rachel, Lesile, Kiki, and Joanne are talking.]
Chandler: What are you still doing here? She just broke up with the guy, it's time for you to swoop in!
Chandler: Yeah, well, you wouldn't think it was cool if you're eleven years old and all your friends are passing around page 79 of 'Mistress Bitch.'
[Cut to inside the apartment, Rachel and Ross are entering.]
Monica: Ooh...hey honey, are you all right?
Ross: Uh, no, no, see, because not...not all guys are going to be a Paolo.
Monica: Where are you guys going? Come on, one more game!
Rachel: Nice? They were nice. I mean, that's it? I mean, mittens are nice.
Phoebe: Yeah, 'cause hello, these are not her boobies, these are her breasts.
Monica: Hey, how long are you in the city?
[Scene: The Hallway, Chandler and Joey are just leaving Monica and Rachel's.]
Phoebe: Sven I don't understand what you're saying! What is wrong with the flowers? Lorkins? What the hell are lorkins?
Joey: That's right, mister, and I don't care how old you are, as long as you're under my roof you're gonna live by my rules. And that means no sleeping with your girlfriend.
Chandler: Are they end to end, or tall like pancakes?
Joey: Then she came back with "The question is, when are you gonna grow up and realise I have a bomb?"
Monica: Okay...who are you?
Joey: Ma, I don't mean to be disrespectful, but... what the hell are you talking about?! I mean, what about you?
Monica: You guys are always hanging out in my apartment! Come on, I'll only use my left hand, huh? Come on, wussies! (Joey and Chandler pick her up) All right, ok, I gotta go. I'm going, (they throw her out) and I'm gone.
[Scene: Central Perk, Monica, Rachel, Phoebe, Joey, Chandler are there. Ross is still talking to the beautiful woman.]
Rachel: Well, what are you guys doing tomorrow night?
[Scene: The bathroom at the restaurant, Chandler and Joey are talking.]
[Scene: A Restaurant, Joey and Chandler are there, waiting for their dates to show up.]
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, the girls are all there, discussing their bad luck with men.]
(Enter Rachel and Paolo. They are both somewhat flustered)
Kristin: That's funny. Who are they?
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, the girls are holding their boyfriend bonfire.]
[Scene: Central Perk, Chandler and Joey are there. Chandler is preparing to dump Janice again.]
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, firemen are there to handle the bonfire that got out of control.]
Chandler: Ok, Janice. Janice. Hey, Janice. Look, there's no way for me to tell you this. At least there's no new way for me to tell you this. I just don't things are gonna work out.
Ross: Are you sure? Great. Carol? Wanna come over and join us?
[Scene: Out in the hall, the firemen are talking.]
Fireman No. 3: Are you kidding? My girlfriend doesn't know, I'm not gonna tell them!
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Monica and Rachel are babysitting Ben.]
Joey: I don't know. What are you wearing?
Rachel: What are you going to make?
Rachel: (pause) And Monica, what are you going to make?
Rachel: So what are you guys going to do?
Chandler: Who are you going out with?
Phoebe: Where are you going, Mr. Suity-Man?
{Transcriber's Note: The credits list two characters, Tia and Samantha, who I assume are the sweaty women Joey and Chandler meet. However, I don't know which is which, so I've simply called them Woman #1 and Woman #2.}
(Chandler kicks the door closed, angrily. His clothes are askew, he looks beat.)
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Joey and Ross are there, discussing what happened last night.]
Steve: Well, smack my ass and call me Judy! These are fantastic!
Steve: (from kitchen) Ah, cool! Taco shells! (Rachel motions, "You see!") You know, these are... they're like a little corn envelope.
Tommy: (noticing the chick) Ooh, hey! Hey, there little fella. (picks up the chick) Mr. Fuzzy-Man, how are you doing? (starts to pet him) Aww. (The chick poops on his hand.) Eww! Oh! Eww! Gross! Idiot!! Stupid little, fuzzy, yellow creature!! Oh look at me, Im so cute, Im a little chick whos disgusting! God, youre so stupid, how are you not yet extinct!! (the duck wattles behind him and quacks) (to the duck) Quack-quack, quack-quack!! What are you quacking about?! Dumb Donald Doo-Doo!!
[Scene: Central Perk, all are there except Chandler.]
Ross: That was the water fountain! Okay?! Anyway, people are writing reports for me, uh pushing back deadlines to meet my schedule, I'm telling you, you get tough with people you can get anything you want. (Joey walks by with a cup of coffee.) Hey Tribbiani, give me that coffee! Now!
Chandler: Wait, wait! Wh-what are you doing here?
Joey: No, no... how come you are working here?
[Scene: The Hospital, Mr. and Mrs. Geller are there, along with Aunt Lillian. Ross and Monica enter and everyone says hi and kisses.)
Rachel: What are you playing with?
Monica: Yeah you will! The right guy is just around the corner! Okay, are we done with that?
Nina: Are you okay?
Jamie: No, no, no. We were there last night. She kept... (shuddering at the memory) ..bringing swordfish. (Indicating the ladies bathroom) are you gonna go to the, um?
Phoebe: Much as you are.
[The next one is from Episode 417: The One With The Free Porn, Chandler and Joey are lamenting the fact that every beautiful woman they see doesnt want to have sex right then and there like in porn.]
Joey: So what, like people are gonna come in and think, "Uh-oh, I'm outside again?" Of course!
Phoebe: Oh, honey, honey, tell them the story about your patient who thinks things are, like, other things. Y'know? Like, the phone rings and she takes a shower.
Monica: Are you alright?
Monica: Rachel, what are you doing? Its freezing out here. Would you come back inside?
[Scene: Chandler's office, he and Phoebe are there when the phone starts ringing.]
Rachel: Are you seein her again tonight?
Chandler: What are you crazy? That's a baby!
Ross: What the hell are you doing? You scared the crap outta me.
[Scene: Monica and Rachels, Ross, Rachel, Chandler, and Phoebe are sharing a bowl of popcorn, while Monica carefully reads the instruction manual for her television set.]
Monica: Rachel, the cute doctors are here.
Dr. Mitchell: That's because they are.
Rachel: Okay, listen, I'm thinking, why don't we just tell them who we really are? I mean, it'll be fine, I really think it'll be fine.
Monica: Well, my breasts are going to get bigger weather you like it or not! And you know what? It's not just my breasts. My ass is going to get bigger too.
Monica: I said we are not going to do it, okay? Sometimes you can be such a, a big baby.
Rachel: Every day, you are becoming more and more like your mother.
Chandler: You know, Ross, some scientists are now saying that, that monkeys and babies are actually different.
Phoebe: So, um, are you gonna call him?
Rachel: Yeah well, not anymore I can't. He fired us! What are we gonna do? We have to find a pediatrician. Wait wait, Monica said that when you guys were growing up, you really liked your doctor. What was his name?
JOEY: I don't need to think about it. I was Dr. Drake Remoray. That was huge. Big things are gonna happen, you'll see. Ross, you still there?
Guys: Hockey! (They go to leave but are blocked by three of Rachel's friends, Leslie, Kiki, and Joanne. The guys pause to stare at them.) Hockey! Hockey. (The guys.)
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Monica and Rachel are there. Monica is just finishing cleaning the windows.]
[Scene: Central Perk, Ross and Chandler are sitting at a table. Rachel is working. Monica and Phoebe enter.]
Rachel: Hi! How are you?
Ross: No, women are welcome to play.
Ross: You are way off, pal.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Rachel, Monica, and Phoebe are there.]
[Scene: Ross' apartment. Chandler and Joey are there. Ross enters with a pizza.]
Ross: You are not putting that on again! Marcel, OKif you press that button, you are in very, very big trouble.
[Scene: Central Perk. Joey and Ross are there.]
Monica: Excuse me, where are you going?