words in movies
[Scene: Central Perk, everyone but Phoebe are there reading. Rachel is sitting on the couch flanked by Ross and Monica. She suddenly stops reading and starts blinking her left eye as if it's bothering her. The problem is that Joey is on her left and thinks she's winking at him and winks back. Ross is watching this and isn't quite sure of what to make of it.]
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Ross, Chandler, Monica, and Phoebe are eating breakfast.]
Monica: Why are so mad at him?
Chandler: Whoa-whoa-whoa, what are we going to do about my job?
Monica: No. If you thought this mess is going to bother me, you are wrong! All right, let's go Blinky! (She ushers Rachel out the door, but before the door fully closes she sticks her head back in.) Chandler!!!! (Chandler agrees to clean up the mess.)
Ross: Dude, you are sick.
[Scene: Monica's eye doctor's office, Monica and Rachel are waiting in an exam room and looking at this big white thing used to check eyes. I have no idea what it is, and if an ophthalmologist happens to know what that is, let me know.]
Rachel: (really excited) Great!! It was very, very nice to meet you sir--Ow! Hey! What are you doing?! Are you crazy! (He took out that thing they use to look at people's retinas and looked at Rachel's when she was shaking his hand causing her to flinch and scream at him.)
Dr. Miller: Very good Monica! You know where they are.
[Scene: Central Perk, Phoebe, Rachel, Monica, and Joey are there.]
Rachel: Y'know, I-I gotta tell ya, those eye drops are a miracle. My eye is a 100% better.
Chandler: Hey, so where are we staying? Is the movie putting us up in a big hotel suite?
Ross: Phoebe, are you, are you mad at me, or something? 'Cause if are please, tell me what it is I did!
[Scene: Phoebe's cab, Joey and Chandler are headed across the George Washington bridge on their way to Las Vegas. Joey is driving.]
Joey: What are you talking about?! I'm the lead in a movie!
[Scene: Central Perk, Ross, Phoebe, Rachel, and Monica are there. Ross is trying to figure out why Phoebe's mad at him.]
Ross: Okay, are you mad at me because my hair gel smells?
Ross: Are you angry at me because I said your handwriting is childlike?
Monica: Chandler! What are you doing here?
Rachel: Okay, they are. (No they're not.)
Rachel: (as she's being dragged) What are you? Monica!! Stop it!! Oh my God! Stop it! (Monica drags her totally onto the floor and on her back.)
Rachel: Oh my God! You really are freakishly strong!
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, time lapse, Phoebe and Monica are playing cards as the phone rings.]
Ross: Why are you mad at me?
Stanley: I don't know. A week? Maybe two? The money will turn up! People will always wanna invest in movies! Hey, you're not rich are ya?
The Grip: Hey pal, are you Joey Tribbiani?
Ross: Wait a minute, I know why I'm being such an ass, why are you?
Joey: Hey, what are you guys gonna do?
Joey: I don't think they are.
Monica: Ooh! But the band and the photographer are coming all the way in from New Jersey!
[Scene: Monica's apartment. They are all sitting around.]
[Scene: Outside. They are a bunch of people arranging chairs, shoveling snow and making other preparations.]
Ross: You know, sometimes when I'm alone in my apartment, I look over here and you guys... are just having dinner or... watching TV or something, but... it makes me feel better. And now when I look over, who am I gonna see? The Gottliebs, the Yangs? They don't make me feel so good. (Joey pats Ross on his back)
Ross: Woha! Wait... What are we doing? What we have is too important to mess it up over some girl. I mean, we can get laid anytime we want.
Rachel: Ross, those things go like 40 miles an hour! Ok? When you're... and there is that moment when you are at the top, when you just don't know if you're gonna return back to earth!
Monica: Groomsman, groomsman, why are you just standing there, where is your bridesmaid? (into microphone) We've got a broken arrow. Bridesmaid down! (realizes) Oh, that's me.
(She walks down the aisle with the groomsman. We cut to inside Central Perk, where Phoebe and Chandler are waiting.)
[Scene: The hallway between the two apartments. Chandler and Joey are walking up the stairs.]
Chandler: Why are you wearing my apron?
Monica: These are for Erica!
[Scene: Chandler and Monica's apartment. Chandler and Monica are looking through some papers.]
Phoebe: Ok. What are you gonna be doing today?
Rachel: Oh, great, Are you gonna be ok?
Dr. Green: What are you doing here, Geller?
Chandler: Are you asking permission to break the pact?
Joey: What are you doing?
Chandler: You are going downer!
Monica: Oh! It was our pleasure. We are so much enjoying getting to know you.
Monica: Are you awake?
(Time lapse. Chandler and Monica are in bed now)
Joey: Now YOU'RE telling me I can't see her?? You guys are killing me! She's forbidden fruit! It's like ... like she's the princess and I'm the stable boy ... Why are you doing this, huh? Did Ross tell you not to let me go over there?
[Scene: Chandler and Monica's apartment. They are having a diner party with Phoebe and Mike.]
Ross: You too! What are the odds?
Mr Campbell: Well, if you don't want to leave, why are we having this lunch?
[Scene: Central Perk. Chandler and Monica are there when Phoebe enters.]
Phoebe: What are you, what are you talking about? How did this happen?
[Scene: The playground. Ross, Rachel and Emma are still there. Rachel comes walking to Ross and Emma with something between her hands.]
Ross: No seriously. I have job security for life. You know, I never have to worry. (Rachel starts crying) Oh, look at you. Look how happy you are for me.
Joey: (squinting his eyes) Are you kiddin'? I think I just saw a bat in the corner!
Girl: Who are you?
Phoebe: Great, okay, what are you gonna change it to?
Joey: Oh, hi, I'm Joey. My stupid friends are buying this house. Who are you?
Mackenzie: What are you? Eight?
Mark: Are you sure, because we may have something at Louis Vuitton.
Mark: Clever. (back to Rachel) So how are you?
Chandler: Man, those two dogs are going at it!
Woman: Oh hey, how are you?
[Scene: Central Perk. Phoebe and Mike are leaving.]
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's. They are preparing to show Laura around. Laura is standing with her back to the window, Chandler and Monica are standing on either side of her, facing each other.
[Flashback scene from last week, Monica and Chandler's kitchen, Rachel, Ross, Monica and Chandler are there.]
Monica: I know, but what are we gonna do? She really needs this job.
Announcer: Get a load of this... She's proposing to him. Guess we know who wears the pants in that family. (people are laughing, while Mike still seems bewildered)
Phoebe-Estelle: What are you saying?
Phoebe-Estelle: Don’t take that tone with me. Who you think you are? Alan Lemond, the first black man to fly solo across the Atlantic?
Rachel: Oh my God Phoebe! I mean Im justWait a minute. If Im your maid of honor that means you are Monicas.
Phoebe: Alright, wait, so what you're saying is that the chef is at the Hamilton Club, but the food is not and the drinks are there, but the bartender is not? Are you, are you FREAKING KIDDING ME!?
[Scene: house next to the one the Bings are moving into. Chandler and Monica knock, a lady opens the door.]
Girl: I'm Mackenzie. My stupid parents are selling this house.
Monica: They could be our neighbors, what are they like?
(Chandler and Monica are speechless).
Phoebe: Hey Joey, want come with me to… are you ok?
Joey: Oh, hey, my pleasure. (he suddenly becomes very serious) So what are your intentions with my Phoebe?
Chandler: The only way that that is going to happen, is if the other couple are the Hitlers.
[Scene: The house Monica and Chandler are viewing. Janice comes down the stairs.]
Mike: I heard that weddings are like a 40 billion dollar a year industry.
Janice: Chandler, what are you talking about?
Rachel: You are never going to believe what happened to me today.
Ross: So, what are you gonna do?
Joey: You know what? You are my friends, I wanna be supportive, I will come with you. SHOTGUN!
Rachel: The nights are the hardest. (Checks her watch.) But then the day comes! And thats every bit as hard as the night. And then the night comes again
[Scene: Joey's place. Rachel and Joey are talking]
Rachel: I know... Honey, seriously, I did it all. The luggage that I'm taking is in the bedroom, this is Emma's Paris stuff, these are the boxes that I'm having shipped, and that's the sandwich that I made for the plane...
Erica: Plus hotels are fun! My room has this little fridge full of free snacks!
Ross: Oh man, I can't believe you guys are leaving this place.
Ross: What are you guys doing?
Monica (enters the room): Are, are you kidding? This is packing?
Rachel: You guys are gonna come and visit me, right?
[Scene: Guest room. Rachel and Phoebe are sitting on the bed.]
Phoebe: It's a cotton swab with a bit of my saliva on it, so that if they perfect the cloning process while you are over there, you can use the DNA to create your own Pheebs!
[Scene: Central Perk. The entire gang is there, and Chandler and Monica are handing out presents.]
Chandler: Really? Then what are they doing in our guestroom?
Monica: What are you talking about? These aren't mine.
Ross: Are you kidding? Oh my God...
[Scene: The guest bedroom. Rachel and Monica are talking to each other.]
Chandler: Don't say Richard! Well, if they're not Monica's and they're not yours, then whose are they?
Chandler: I think these are yours.
Phoebe: These are not mine... Look how flimsy they are, come on! Good God! You try to hang a guy from a waterpipe with these, they'll snap like a piece of licorice.
Ross: God! I can't believe she saved me for last. (looking out to the balcony) Why are they taking so long?
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's apartment. The others are still there.]
Monica: Oh no! You and Phoebe are gonna help me in here.
Chandler: Hey Mon, I think I figured out whose handcuffs they are.
Monica: Erica, are you okay?
Erica: (in pain) Ooh! Are you sure?
Monica: Erica, are you okay?
(He starts. And well, Celebration was never meant to be played on the bagpipe, so even the best bag pipe players in the world would have trouble with that particular song. So of course, for a beginner like Ross, it sounds absolutely dreadful. The assembled audience minus Phoebe, are horrified. Phoebe, immune to bad music, seems to enjoy it.)
[Cut to Ross's apartment. Ross and Rachel are there. It's another scene from 1016 TOW Rachel's Going Away Party.]
Chandler: Where are you going?
[Scene: The delivery room at the hospital. Monica, Chandler and Erica are there. Erica is in labor, and she is breathing heavily.]
Monica: What kind of social situation are you comfortable with?
Phoebe: David! (He kisses her cheek) What-what are you doing here? Arent you supposed to be in Russia?
Joey: Yeah, Erica went into labor last night. Monica and Chandler are at the hospital right now!
Joey: So what does that mean? Are you guys getting back together?
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's apartment. They are hauling out the porcelain dog from Joey's room. Chandler is holding the dog by the rear in a rather interesting position.]
Monica: (to her son) Oh, hey handsome! Oh, I'm gonna love you so much that no woman is ever gonna be good enough for you! (To Chandler, on the verge of tears) Oh, we are so lucky!
Chandler: Oh, yeah! These are the faces of two people in the know!
[Scene: Cousin Frannies Wedding Reception, Monica and Ross are entering and finding their table.]