words in movies
[Scene: A Restaurant, Phoebe, Rachel, and Monica are having brunch.]
[Scene: Ross's apartment, Chandler, Joey, and Ross are finishing watching Die Hard on video.]
Joey: What are you talking about? Bitch.
Rachel: Oh my God Phoebe! I mean Im justWait a minute. If Im your maid of honor that means you are Monicas.
[Scene: Ross's apartment, Die Hard has ended, only I dont think Joey and Ross know that yet. As you see, they are both asleep. And theyre on the same couch. Which means theyre sleeping together. Not like Joey is at one end and Ross is on the other, they both happen to be lying down and sleeping together. Well, there hasnt been any clothes removed so not that kind of sleeping together. Not that theres anything wrong with that. That is unless youre a Republican in which that kind of thing will bring about the downfall of Western society, especially if they should happen to want to get married. Anyway, let me recap. No, there is too much, let me sum up. Ross and Joey are taking a nap together on top of each other and both wake-up at the same time, realize what they just did, scream, and jump up.]
Monica: What are you doing?
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's, Joey is entering, Rachel and Phoebe are already there.]
Rachel: How come you are?!
Phoebe: What are you talking about?
Ross: I I dont know what you are talking about.
Monica: Chandler! (Knocks on the door.) Chandler! I just figured out who you are!
Chandler: What? Are you kidding? That was like 16 years ago.
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's, Joey and Ross are laying out the ground rules for the maid of honor auditions to Rachel and Phoebe.]
Rachel: Thank you. Thank you very much. Umm, Ive known them separately and Ive known them together and-and to know them as a couple is to know that you are truly in the presence of love. So I would like to raise my glass (Grabs a glass and holds it up) to Monica and Chandler and the beautiful adventure they are about to embark upon together. I can think of no two people better prepared for the journey.
Phoebe: Okay, I cant believe that Monica and Chandler are getting married. I remember talking about this day with Rachel while we were showering together, naked. (Raises her glass and drinks.)
[Scene: A random apartment building, Chandler and Monica are knocking on the door of the woman from the beginning.]
[Scene: Central Perk, Joey and Ross are giving Phoebe and Rachel the results of their election. Somewhat faster than Florida I might add.]
Joey: All right, well first of all I would like to say that you both performed very well. Okay? You should be proud of yourselves. And-and I would also like to say that in this competition there are no losers. Well, except for RachelDamnit!
Phoebe: (running after her) Rach, its gonna be okay! (To Ross and Joey) You guys are the best!
Monica: Are you gonna break up with me if I get fat again?
Monica: What if I have babies, okay? I mean Im gonna look different. Im okay with that, but Im not sure that you are!
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's, Joey and Ross are napping together again and both wake up at the same time.]
(Suddenly Rachel clears her throat and the camera cuts to the rest of the gang staring at them. Needless to say Joey and Ross are shocked and slowly turn their heads to see the gang.)
Joey: (reacting first by jumping up) Dude! What the hell are you doing?! God! (Heads for his room leaving Ross.)
Ross: Look, I'm sorry to hear about your tragedy, ok? But the swings are perfectly safe, and besides Emma loves them. You know what, you should come with us and you'll see!
Monica: Please ... if I win the lottery, you guys are not gonna leave me. Someone gave me a basket of mini-muffins last week and I couldn't get rid of you for 3 days!
Chandler: Here we go. Stand up straight. (smiling) Big smile. (opens the door and both are smiling exaggeratedly)
Monica: You are so handsome! I wanna make love to you right here, right now! (Growls and pulls him into a kiss.)
Monica: That’s right. You’re making a commitment and that’s the same, whether you do that at the Plaza or, where are you gonna do it?
Charity guy: Wow! Are you here to make another donation the same day? I don’t think that that’s ever happened before.
Mr. Geller: (shaking her hand) So are you his mother or his father?
Laura: Well, I'm sorry I brought it up. So, are either one of you planning on staying at home with your child... (someone knocks on the door)
Laura: You know, I... I feel like I've been here before. Are any other couples in the building adopting?
Rachel: Oh, oh Ross, oh my God, are you okay?
Rachel: Ross, see! I told you, those swings are evil! Alright, that is it. That is the last time Emma is getting on one of those things for her entire life.
Monica: Oh, by the way, you are more than welcome to look under any of the furniture, because, believe me, you won't find any porn or cigarettes under there!
Chandler: What the hell are you doing?
Laura: What are you doing here?
Laura: Are you friends with him?
Charity guy: Are you here to take more money? Because, I think what you're looking for is an ATM.
[Scene: The New York City Children's Fund building. Phoebe and Mike are entering.]
[Scene: Chandler and Monica's apartment. They are sitting in their living room when the phone rings.]
Monica: It was Laura... She gave us a great report and we are officially on the waiting list.
Ross: Are you kidding?
[Scene: Central Perk. Monica and Chandler enter, the others are sitting on the couch.]
Monica: What? You are way off, lady!
[Scene: Monica's apartment. Phoebe enters carrying the horrific 'painting' of Gladys. Monica and Rachel are sitting on the couch.]
Chandler: We are supposed to make these decisions together! Did you not watch the Doctor Phil I taped for you?
Monica: That's my favourite kind! Okay, we are doing this!
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's apartment. Rachel and Monica are in there, and Phoebe enters]
Rachel: Oh! Phoebe, all babies are beautiful!
Ross: Guess where they are?
Phoebe: Are you asking me out? Cause it would be kinda weird since you just broke up with my sister.
[Scene: Ross and Rachel are at the playground with Emma. Rachel in putting her back in the stroller and Ross is tending to his wound]
Joey: Ohhhh! These seats are great!
Joey: How late are we?
Joey: You are not at Thanksgiving?
Rachel: What are you doing here!
Ross: Yeah. What are we gonna do?
Phoebe: You guys, there are people in there who are not getting any happier!
Phoebe: Alright, what are we gonna say?
Monica: What? Are you serious?! (To Chandler) Joey smells gas!
Monica: (gasps) Oooh! They are in for a world of pain!
Joey: (throws down a small wad of money, and as his hand twin starts to unfold it, Joey once again brings attention to their special gift to the world. {Y'know, looking at it now, they really don't have that similar of hands. Joey's are bigger.}) Ooh-ho-ho! (The dealer stares at him and he stops.)
[time lapse – they are still in the hall]
Ross: How are we gonna decide who gets this?
Phoebe: What are we gonna do? I'm starving.
Monica: Chandler, where are your tools?
Chandler: Are you serious? (they hug)
Ross: I'm just so happy you guys are finally getting a kid.
(Monica and Chandler are looking curiously at Joey.)
Phoebe: What are you gonna name the baby?
Rachel: I know, I know, and you were right Ross. (To Amy) You are soo irresponsible I am never letting you baby-sit ever again!
Chandler: Emma, how old are you? How old are you today? (holds up his index finger again)
Phoebe: Well, you know, if you want fashion help, Rachel and I are going shopping tomorrow. You're more than welcome to come with us, right?
[Scene: The Adoption Agency in Ohio. Monica and Chandler are entering with a man.]
Monica: Ok, thank you.(the man leaves) Uh, well this is it. Are you OK?
Erica: You're kidding me? I mean, it's enough that you are a doctor. But on top of it, you're married to a reverend?
Phoebe: What are you talking about? Sarah's great!
Phoebe: Well, I still think that it’s a stupid reason not to call someone again. You are calling her! And if you need to, just get an extra plate of fries for the table!
[Scene: A clothes store. Ross and Phoebe are shopping]
Rachel: Yeah, down from seven hundred, you are saving like two hundred bucks!
Phoebe: Oh! okay. Wait, are we in Joey's imagination?
Chandler: We are NOT signing those papers.
Monica: (very emotional) Because... We may not be who she thinks we are but no-one will ever love that baby more than us.
Monica: (Almost crying) Please.. please, we are so close.
Chandler: But we are not the one she chose! How can you feel okay about this?
[Scene: A restaurant. Joey is on his date with Phoebe’s friend, Sarah. They are sitting opposite each other on a table for two. Their waiter approaches with two plates.]
Joey: (Spotting her movements takes her hand into his own) You are beautiful, you know that?
Sarah: They are delicious (takes a few from the plate, puts one in her mouth and places the rest on her plate, then starts to reach over to Joey's platter again)
[Scene: Ross and his date walk into a lobby. They are both wearing their jackets]
Ross: Oh! You are gonna love it! (The girl is looking in the other direction as Ross is taking off his own coat, revealing the pink and white ladies shirt) and I'm so glad, we're finally doing this.
Sarah: What are you doing? I thought you don't share food.
Erica: So who are you?
[Scene: The Adoption Agency in Ohio. Monica and Chandler are entering.]
Chandler: Well, our names really are Monica and Chandler. We're from New York.
(Chandler takes Monica's hand, and gets serious) Look, before we sign anything we really have to talk...(pause) We're not who you think we are.
Joey: (nods) So, why are you still wearing it?
[Scene: Central Perk. Rachel and Phoebe are looking at some photos and they're sitting next to the window.]
Chandler: Those are all really old!
Joey: (walking towards her to hold her and support her) Monica, you understand what we are saying, right?
Precious: I'm not letting you leave until you tell me what's going on here. I mean, are you guys getting back together or something?
Rachel: Are you serious?
(pause before Monica and Chandler speak, they look like they are looking for the right words)
Phoebe: Wha..? Again with the nature, what are you? Beavers?
Joey: What the hell are you doin'?
[Scene: The Adoption Agency in Ohio. Monica and Chandler are still talking with Erica.]
(The girls are stumped)
Ross: Monica categorizes her towels. How many categories are there?
Rachel: Y’know what, you are mean boys, who are just being mean!
Ross: What the hell are doing?!!
Liam: How are ya man?
Monica: We sure are.
Phoebe: Oh! These are the ones I was looking at in the store. (she got earrings)
Ross: Seriously you guys, what's going on? What are these for?
Rachel: Ok, Ross, what�s going on here, are we just bringing strange women back to the apartment now?
Ross: Those are the pacts!
Chandler: Your hands are shaking.
[Scene: Rachel and Joey's apartment. It's just Ross and Rachel. They put the camera on a tripod in the kitchen and they are standing in front of the camera.]
Monica: Are you gonna be ok, officer, uhm,...
Phoebe: Are you kidding?
Joey: Uuuh.. yes, they are my stuffed clams.
Roy: Are you talking about me?
[We get back to the Class of '91 reunion, where Ross and Chandler are still looking at Missy.]