words in movies
Joey: Look, just because I know about you two, doesn't mean I like looking at it.
Chandler: Aren't you supposed to be at an audition for another hour?
Monica: (To Chandler) Rachel's at work.
(She puts her leg up on the chair and removes this huge knife from her boot to open the box with. The guys are shocked at the knife's existence.)
Phoebe: Eeeee-(She opens the box and removes its contents and sees that it's a fur coat.)-ohh!! God! (She throws it at Joey.)
Phoebe: Yeah! Why would my mother send me a fur? Doesn't she know me but at all! Plus, I have a perfectly fine coat that no innocent animal suffered to make!
Chandler: Yeah, just some 9-year-old Filipino kids who worked their fingers bloody for 12 cents an hour. (Phoebe stares at him wide-eyed. Chandler sees her reaction.) That didn't happen, I made that up!
Monica: (looking at the flyer) This is all of your things.
(They both start screaming at the top of their lungs.)
(Rachel grabs the bug bomb, activates it, throws it at the figure, and they both run out through the fog.)
Monica: And he came at us with an axe, so Rachel had to use a bug bomb on him!
Rachel: Oh my God! Oh my God, look at these pelts!
[Scene: Ross's Apartment, the gang is helping Ross move out by carrying boxes. Chandler has picked a particularly large and apparently heavy box, because he takes a running start at it and still can't budge it.]
Ross: Unreasonable? How about we have this conversation when one of you guys gets married! You have no idea what it takes to make a marriage work! All right, it's about compromise! Do you always like it? No! Do you do it? Yes! Because it's not all laughing, happy, candy in the sky, drinking coffee at Central Perk all the time! It's real life, okay? It's what grown-ups do! (He storms out.)
Phoebe: I think he's right. You guys hang out at the coffeehouse way too much.
(Monica and Chandler turn and stare at him.)
Joey: Well, I'm keeping so many things to myself these days, something was bound to slip out! (He glares at Chandler.)
Phoebe: Are you still mad at us?
Joey: Yeah you see umm, well, I'm an actor. Right? So I gotta keep my emotions right at the surface y'know? See what I'm saying? I gotta lot of balls in the air. (Makes like he's juggling.) Y'know what I mean? It's tough! Guys like me, y'know, you wander around, you're alone
Monica: Hey, look at you! Where have you been?
Joey: You can totally tell! Here look, watch me. (He stands up and turns his back to them so that he is facing the window.) Smile! Frown. Smile! Frown. (The camera cuts to Ross outside hanging up the phone.) Smile! (Ross turns around and sees Joey alternately smiling and frowning and just stares at him for a second and heads back inside.)
Monica: Oh, sweetie. Oh, look at you. You're shivering.
[Scene: A curbside newsstand, Phoebe is whistling and walking up to it wearing her fur coat. She stops and starts to look through a magazine and notices a squirrel on a nearby tree chirping at her.]
Phoebe: (to the squirrel) Okay, stop tormenting me! This mink! Okay, they're mean! And they hate squirrels! And y'know, okay, most of these probably wanted to be coats! (The squirrel stares at her.) All right, fine, now I get it. (To the clerk.) Here. (She hands him her coat.) You take it. (To the squirrel.) Are you happy now? I'm cold!
[Scene: Chandler and Monica's apartment. Chandler enters. Rachel and monica are seated at the table.]
Joey: (voice strained) Couldn't have this conversation down at the truck huh?
Phoebe: Just one last time erm... the marriage thing... there's no wiggle room? None at all?
Mike: Can we at least try living together? I mean you might change your mind about marriage.
Monica: Well you know it's just like living with a girl. Only they don't steal your makeup. Unless they're playing "This is what my sister would look like" (Looks at Chandler)
Chandler: Phoebe, did you see that?! He totally checked you out! He is so cute! (Looking at his tea.) Mine has a picture of The Village People, what does that mean?
Ross: (yelling at Chandler) I have sex with dinosaurs??
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's. Chandler is looking at the screen of his laptop, shaking his head.]
[Scene: Central Perk, Chandler and Joey are there. Joey is looking at a National Geographic and giggling.]
(Monica opens the door and Mike is standing at the doorway)
Chandler: Hey, Ross, I just wanted to apologize... (looks at laptop screen)..don't tell me you actually made those gay pictures of me?
Ross: uhu uhu, check this out. (Chandler sits down and looks at laptop screen)
Ross: Exactly!! (sits back down at his laptop and starts typing)
Chandler: Ross, what're you... what're you... what are you doing? (looks at laptop screen)You're having a memorial service for yourself!?
Monica: Hey, at least I knew where my guy was.
Manny: (looking at the sofa) Where did they go?
Chandler: At least he died doing what he loved... watching blimps (he goes in the bedroom)
Chandler: Please, one ridiculous problem at a time!
(Chandlers opens the door. A beautiful woman stands at the doorway.)
Chandler: Chandler, Chandler Bing. I'm not gay, I'm not gay at all.
[Scene: Chandler's hotel room, he's sitting there with Joey who's talking about his helmet and running his hand through that feathery thing at the top.]
Chandler: Yeah, because if I was at my old job we'd say 300 million? No thank you!
Monica: God! Look at all these tickets! It's so exciting! You know I haven't won anything since the sixth grade.
Chandler: (looking around at the others)I'll ask. (To Ross) Boohaki?
Chandler: Hang up, hang up. And that was a great movie! (Monica hangs up) I'm so gonna get back at Ross... oh yeah, this will show him, here we go (starts typing something).
Monica: Money! (they all look at her) Friends...
Phoebe: If we are not doing it together, we're not doing it at all! So, say goodbye to your tickets! (She holds out the bowl, and makes as to drop the tickets on the street).
Rachel: Oh, it is so unfair. It's like that time they promoted Sandra over me at work.
Chandler: (looking at the answering machine) Hey, there's two messages. These could be from work!
(they all keep staring at Phoebe)
Rachel: No, she was just much better at job than me!
(Rachel glares at him)
(they just look at her for a moment; then they go back to checking the tickets)
Phoebe: Yeah! Now, how would you feel if we gave all the wedding money to charity and we just got married at City Hall?
(he idly goes to the sofa, starts browsing a magazine. Everybody stares at him)
(they all look at Ross)
(They all glare evilly at Phoebe)
Phoebe: (hides her mouth behind the cup and speaks in the "pigeon voice" from before) Coo, again. Don't blame the pretty lady. It was not her fault. It was me, the pigeon, coo! (pause) Seriously, stop staring at her.
(Rachel comes out of her room and starts staring at him unseen)
Phoebe: Im hearing what youre saying, but at our prices everyone needs toner.
Monica: Oh, honey!I can't. I was just telling these guys that things are crazy at the restaurant!
Monica: No, I cant afford this either. No. I-I-Im, Im just to figure out which one I want then Im gonna get it at Kleinmans, this discount place in Brooklyn, day after tomorrow they are having a huge sale.
Joey: Well, at the Christmas party him and Santa did some definitely gay stuff!
(Ross enters and he's really angry. He goes towards Chandler who's sitting at the counter)
Chandler: I'm sorry, he's a little bit wound up, we had to stop at every maple candy stand on the way here.
Earl: Well I only have one thing to do today. (He looks at his board in his office that reads, "Todays Tasks: KILL SELF.") I guess I could push it back.
Ross: At least tell me where you hid it.
Rachel: Hey, so you guys, the funniest thing happened, at work...
Phoebe: Well at least all my songs don't taste like garlic. Yeah, there are other ingredients Monica.
Monica: You know what? I take back what I said before. You keep playing at the restaurant, because with your music driving people inside, my bar sales are going up like crazy.
(he picks up the suitcase, which falls open, revealing all the stuff they have taken from the hotel. The receptionist just looks at them.)
Phoebe: (singing) Food here at 'Javu'..will kill you..the food here at 'Javu' ...will kill you..
Mike: Yes. Yeah and thanks for all the wedding night advice. (walks away) That didn't make me uncomfortable at all! Alright, so I'll see everybody tonight?
Joey: (looks at her for a moment) What the hell are you talking about??
Chandler: I got you something from Vermont! (Sits down at the table)
(Joey and Rachel continue to look at each other in silence for a while)
Monica: Phoebe, it's not what you wear. It's sort of your songs... I just don't think you should play at the restaurant anymore.
Chandler: I could fall asleep at a play.
Joey: I wish I could but I just found out that I have to be at work really early the next day, so I can't go, but, you know, take the extra ticket and invite whoever you want.
(Monica points at Joey, Rachel turns and sees him)
Ross: Oh, no, it's no big deal, I mean, if I weren't doing this I'd just, you know, be at the gym working out.
Joey: Ok, ok! Fine! You can come, but don't tell anybody else. It's up on the roof at 8.
Rachel: Really?! Arent you sweet! I gotta tell you though, I am, I am having the hardest time placing you. Oh-oh hang on! Did we umm, did we fool around at Lance Davis graduation party?
[Scene: Ross, Charlie and Professor Spafford are sitting at the table in a restaurant]
Monica: (to Rachel) Look at you with all the guys!
Ross: What? (turns around to look at Rachel)
Rachel: Hello. (to Gavin) But you know what, hey, new day, new leaf, I am just really really happy ... (sees Gavin staring at Heather) I'm sorry, obviously Heather's ass has something more important to say so I'll just wait 'till it's finished.
Joey: Im just so nervous! Yknow? The callback isnt until tomorrow at five. I feel like my head is going to explode!
Chandler: (looks him in the eye) I'm not breaking up with her! (they stare at each other for a while, then Joey blows in his face)
[Scene: Monica, Chandler, and Phoebe's, Chandler is looking at the ring he bought and not liking it.]
[Scene: At the counter. Ross is sitting there, drinking. Phoebe approaches him.]
(Rachel just stands there staring at Joey and Charlie in silence. After a while, Ross turns around and sees them.)
Rachel: I don't know why Joey had to kiss her! I mean, of all the girls at the party, GOD!
(Joey and Charlie enter. Ross looks at her)
(Ross and Mike glance at each other then both suddenly turn to Phoebe who is gone. �They sheepishly exchange glances.)
Rachel: No, really. Really, Pheebs, youre not gonna be the one worrying about saving for college, or yelling at them when theyre bad, yknow, or deciding to put them on Ritalin when they just wont calm down. Yknow?
[Scene: At the Spa, Phoebe is at the half-opened door]
Chandler: I'd love to stay, but I have eh... (points at the cup) got a hot date... (starts to leave)
Rachel: (to the cowgirl) And you are so in style right now. Yknow, I work at Ralph Lauren and the whole fall line has got this like equestrian theme going on. I dont suppose you saw the cover of British Vogue, but
Phoebe: Well, you promised me a fun road trip! Weve been on the road six hours and youve been asleep for five and a half! We are switching at the next rest stop and you are going to drive all the way back! That will be your punishment, you greedy sleeper!
(David puts his napkin up to his mouth and starts laughing at his own line. Matt notices him after a while and starts laughing as well.)
Janice: Oh! Sid is still in his room. I don't allow porn at home so this is like a vacation for him. So did you do it? Did you make your deposit?
Janice: What, you can do it in the parking lot of a Taco Bell, but you can't do it at a doctor's office?
Charlie: (to Joey) So, I have to go shopping today, which is my least favourite thing, I'm soo bad at picking out clothes!
Charlie: Oh, well, we can go see the Chronos Quartet at the Avery Fisher Hall.
Chandler: (looking at the picture of the female reproductive system) Wow! Fortunately she has a very pretty face!
(Dr. Connelly glares at Chandler)
Chandler: Is that a hint? Because we love you Doctor Connelly but we don't think we'd want you to be our child! (Dr. Connelly glares at him) Wow, talking about an inhospitable environment!
Janice: Oh! Someone's a little cranky today cuz they have to do it in a cup! (laughs) Oh! They gave you the kiddy size (looking at the cup in his hand).
Ross: Wait a minute, you guys. Oh, I wanna ask you something. I-I I may get to speak at this paleontology convention and if I do, I'd love for you guys to come and hear me.
Joey: All right, so. How did it go at the fertility clinic?
(Turns to look at Professor Sherman, only to discover that he is sleeping)
Phoebe: Well normally I dont, but yknow (looks at the TV) Green Bay is playing.
Rachel: (yelling at the stranger) Alright! Enough out of you!
Monica: This would be a beautiful place to get married, yeah, but I wouldnt put the aisle there and I would never have the ceremony there! (Points to both places.) I mean youd have the ceremony under this big beautiful arch. (The arch at the entrance to the room.)
(Zack comes out of the bathroom. They all sit down at the table.)
Ross: Guess who's up for keynote speaker at the National Paleontology Conference?
Phoebe: Oh! I'm sorry Rachel, I don't have time for your childish games, ok? I still have to go find something incredible to wear so I can beat Mike at "who's more over who"! (at which she walks away)
Rachel: (staring at him) Whno, but yknow who did stop in here looking for ya, Tennille.
Ross: (very excited) Look at all these paleontologists!!