words in movies
Phoebe: Okay, umm, if a kid gets straight As, his parents would say, "Yeah, he pulled a Monica." Y'know? Or a fireman saves a baby, and they go, "Yeah I know, he pulled a Monica." Or someone hits a homerun and the announcer says, "Yeah, that ones outta here." Though some things dont change.
Joey: You wanna see what I got? (He gets up to empty out his pockets) Okay? Ive got a baby Tootsie Roll, a movie stub, keys, a Kleenex, a rock, and an army man. Hey!
Phoebe: Hey, are you going to find out the sex of the baby?
Phoebe: Are you two talking about the same baby? Hey! Have you started off thinking of names yet?
Joey: (entering) Rachels having her baby!! (Phoebe turns and looks at him.) Which is of no interest to me, Im a neurologist.
Dr. Long: Okay! All your tests look fine. Now, are you two interested in knowing the sex of the baby?
Ross: So, I uh I called the doctor and now we both know the sex of the baby.
Rachel: Oh, yes! Well have ourselves a little baby Ruth
Rachel: Oh Joey, Im so happy things worked out for us that were having this baby together. I love you so much.
(She hands the baby to Joey who pulls down the blanket to reveal Rosss face where the babys should be.)
(Finally, the baby is delivered and starts crying.)
Rachel: Joey! The baby is kicking for the first time! Will you please come feel this?!
Doctor: Oh, here is your beautiful baby. Congratulations!
<Ross and Rachel are putting baby stuff together like they're going to be going somewhere.>
Joey: Hey Ross! The babys kicking!
Ross: My God, the babys kicking. Thats great. Although I kinda wish I-I wouldve been there to feel the kicking for the first time yknow.
Joey: And-and theres no danger to her and the baby?
Ross: No I-I-I would love to be around for you and the baby. And we-we can just try it like on a temporary basis.
Phoebe: You want it there? You take it there baby!
Rachel: Oh well yeah me too. Um.. I had a baby.
Monica: Is this the video of the baby being born? Sweetie, this is Phoebes. Why were you even watching it?
Rachel: Okay. (watching the tape) Ooh, my! (Rachel jumps when the woman starts screaming) Woah! Why is that baby torturing that woman?!
Chandler: No, the babys out! Look, look!
Rachel: (thinking) Youre going to have a baby, and you need to be prepared. Now, youre going to make yourself watch the whole thing. Just do it! (Rachel puts the tape in the VCR)
Ross: Rachel whos carrying my baby? Rachel?
Ross: A pigeon, a pigeon. (previously scared Rachel turns away) No, no wait, no-no, an eagle flew in. Landed on the stove and caught fire. The baby, seeing this, jumps across the apartment to the mighty bird�s aid. The eagle, however, misconstrues as an act of aggression and grabs the baby on its talon. Meanwhile the faucet fills the apartment with water. Baby and bird still up lays (?) are locked in a death grip, swirling around the whirl pool, that fills the apartment.
Rachel: and I know Chandler is kidding but it happens every time he touches my stomach. I mean Im really worried the babys not going to like him. (Joey is staring at the table.) Are you okay?
Rachel: My boss wants to buy my baby!
Joey: What he wants to buy your baby?!
Rachel: Yeah, and umm my baby.
Joey: Man! When you said it was a problem about your boss and the baby I figured it was something about maternity leave.
Joey: Do you think you can just buy my friends baby?!
Monica: You said your boss wants to buy your baby?!
Rachel: No! No, no-no-no Joey he doesnt want to buy my baby! I made that up!
Chandler: Wow, Ralph Lauren is really going out of there way to show theyre not in the baby buying business.
Mona: Yeah, you still have feelings for me. And-and to be honest, I-I still have feelings for you. And I wish that we can work it out Ross, but we cant. Its too complicated with you and Rachel and the baby, I-I just It just wasnt meant to be.
Aunt Lisa: Congratulations on the baby, and on the wedding
Ross: Yeah baby!
Joey: Yeah you are baby.
Ross: Yeah well, he's not gonna get this one. Ben is way cuter than that kid. I mean look at him, look at you, (Starts to whine like a baby and Joey just glares at him.)
Rachel: So whats the final head count on my baby shower?
Phoebe: What? Hes gonna be dressed as a baby! (Mrs. Green enters.) Oh hi Mrs. Green!
Rachel: So my mother is not coming to my baby shower?!
Rachel: She wants to move in with me and Ross to help take care of the baby.
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, the baby shower is continuing as Rachel walks over to Monica and Phoebe.]
Rachel: Youre right. Youre right. I mean Im about to have a baby, I can tell my mother that I dont want her to just be sleeping on my couch! Oh my God! Shes gonna want to sleep in my bed with me. This cannot happen!
Monica: Yes! Yes! And I think that the first gift that Rachel opens should be from the grandmother of the baby, because youre the most important person in this room. And in the world!
Rachel: He was a hamster! I am not going to vacuum up my baby!
Mrs. Green: Its like youre a cave person. Rachel, you must get a nanny. You dont know how overwhelming this is going to be. I mean when you were a baby I had full time help, I had Mrs. Kay.
Mrs. Green: Plus, what are you planning on doing with the baby while youre trotting out to the garbage ten times a day?
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, the baby shower has ended and everyone except for Mrs. Green have left who is talking to Rachel while Monica and Phoebe are cleaning up.]
Rachel: Yes! Shes gonna help us take care of the baby! Woo-hoo. (Sees that Ross isnt happy.)
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Mrs. Green is telling Ross what needs to be done to baby proof his apartment.]
Mrs. Green: Well Rachel needs help with the baby.
[Scene: Ross and Rachel's, Ross is helping Rachel study for when the baby comes.]
Ross: Excellent! How do you put a baby down for a nap?
Ross: Thats correct! This is an audio question, what do you do when the baby makes this sound? (Makes a sound like someone is choking a cat.)
Rachel: Umm, our situation. Yknow umm, what we mean to each other. And I mean we-were having this baby together, and we live together. Isnt that, isnt that weird?
[Scene: The Baby Furniture Store, Ross and Rachel are checking out.]
Phoebe: Hey! Oh, how did baby shopping go?
Ross: True, but youre allowed to be unreasonable. Youre having our baby.
Rachel: No, not really. Youre pressing the baby into my bladder and now I have to pee. Sorry. (She gets up and starts for the bathroom.)
Rachel: Thats right, still no baby! (To Monica, Joey, and Chandler on the couch) Come on people! Please make some room!
Chandler: Hey! Did you have the baby yet?
Rachel: (interrupting her) Oh Phoebe, thats a great story. Can you tell it to me when youre getting me some iced tea? (Phoebe gets up and Rachel groans.) (To the baby) Oh God, get out! Get out!! Get out!! Get out!!
Rachel: They sent me home from work. They were like, "Start your maternity leave now! Just rest, get ready for the baby." Well yknow what? Screw em! If they dont want me there, Ill just hang out with you guys.
Rachel: Oh, I have to go pee. Apparently this baby thinks that my bladder is a squeeze toy. (Goes to the bathroom.)
Monica: What did the doctor say? Any news on when the baby will come?
Ross: We live together. Youre having our baby. Im not gonna see anybody else. Are you-are you sure you dont want something more?
Monica: Well what is it? What is it? If its gonna help bring the baby here, like today. I mean, I think you should do it.
Monica: Okay fine! I keep betting Phoebe that youre gonna have the baby and I dont want to lose again!
Amy coming out of the bathroom: Hey. Hey where's the baby?
Rachel: Ross, you stay here and talk, Im gonna go have a baby.
Joey: Not a problem. Oh, and just so you know, that guys not going to be bothering you about that baby thing anymore.
Ross: Im getting that baby out of you!
Ross: Were having a baby.
Amy: no, no, then I would get the baby. I mean you know it would be just like a movie. Like at first I wouldn't know what to do with her, then I would rise to the occasion and and then I would get a makeover and then I'd get married.
Monica: Thats it. Im done. I dont care when the baby comes, no more betting.
Phoebe: Is Rachel having the baby?
Monica: You know everything!! Oh wait, double or nothing. I bet you the baby is over seven pounds. (Phoebe isnt interested.) I bet you it has hair. (Shes still not interested.) I bet you its a girl.
Monica: What?! Are you kidding me?! You-you-you think were ready to have a baby now?!
Monica: Okay, just back off mister! Whoa. (Pause) Cause I am ready to have a baby. I just want Joey to be the father.
Ross: (to him) Hey! You wanna live to see your baby?!
Ross: Are you kidding? Look, were not gonna be together just because were having a baby. Okay?
Monica: Listen uh, I-Ive been doing some thinking, and I dont know whether its because were here or Rachels giving birth but umm, I think we should try to have a baby.
Ross: Okay, stop it! I cant deal with this right now. I have to go have a baby.
Monica: Oh good God! If you want a baby so bad just go steal it!
Doctor: And here it is! (The baby cries.)
Rachel: Honey, I don't know how to tell you this, but um, if something were to happen to Ross or to myself <Ross and Rachel knock on wood> um you wouldn't get the baby.
Ross: Um uh Were-were just having this baby together but uh, uh thats all.
Janice: I mean this is so great! Were gonna be baby buddies! (Does the laugh.)
Ross: (To Rachel) Squeeze your legs together and cover the babys ears!
Rachel: Hello baby girl.
Amy: I don't believe this, hold on a second. You guys die and I don't get your baby?
Dr. Long: Thats fine, for now well just call her Baby Girl Green.
Rachel: Oh hey you. Thanks for coming out of me. (The baby cries.) I know. Oh. Yeah. Oh, shes looking at me. Hi! I know you.
[Scene: The Recovery Room, Ross is taking pictures of Rachel holding the baby as the rest of the gang enters.]
Ross: So I guess were back to uh, Baby Girl.
Phoebe: Oh, wait a minute its not gonna be Baby Girl? I thought that was so original!
Joey: (taking the baby) She looks so real! (The gang looks at him.) Yknow what I mean! Shes this whole tiny little person. She already has eyelashes and knees and uh-oh.
Rachel: (gasps) Emma! (Looks at the baby and starts to cry.) See? I dont want it.
Rachel: I just never thought I would raise this baby all by myself. Pretty dumb huh?