words in movies
Rachel: Well, apparently she caught him cheating on her with someone else. Isnt that sad? (Giggles.) God, could you imagine if I actually married him?! I mean how different would my life be?
Ross: I know what you mean, Ive always wondered how different my life would be if-if Id never gotten divorced.
Ross: Id bet Id still be doing my kara-tay. (Thats karate, hes just saying it that way.) Towards the end of our marriage I was doing a lot of kara-tay as a way of releasing the tension from yknow, not doing anything else physical.
Monica: And what if I was still fat? (To Chandler) Well, you wouldnt be dating me, thats for sure.
Chandler: What if I had had the guts to quit my job? Id probably be writing for the New Yorker, getting paid to be funny. But my jobs fun too! I mean tomorrow, I-I dont have to wear a tie.
Ross: Yeah? Oh-oh, shed be so excited!
[Scene: Central Perk, Joey, Fat Monica, and her boyfriend are sitting on the couch. Monicas boyfriend is getting up to get something. For future reference, for the rest of this episode Monicas fat, I wont be calling her Fat Monica throughout.]
Monica: No Joey! Chandler could be your assistant! See, he could answer all of your fan mail and stuff!
Joey: Thats great! That would be great! Lets do that!
Monica: Joey just hired Chandler to be his assistant!
Chandler: Well its kinda hard to be friends with Drake because of his busy schedule and the fact that hes not real.
Joey: All right, heres a list of things for you to do today. Man, this going to be so great! Thank you so much! All right, I got to go to work Im delivering twins today, but only one of them is mine! (Exits.)
Ross: Come on Pheebs, its not that bad! Yknow most people would be excited if they didnt have to work for a couple of weeks.
Ross: will be two months
Phoebe: Roll playing You could be the warden; she could be the prisoner. You could be the pirate; she could be the wench!
Phoebe: Yeah! Or too, you could be two stockbrokers and youre-youre-youre rolling around naked on the trading floor and everybodys watching! (Ross looks at her.) It never happened.
Joey: (entering) Hey! Is uh, is she gonna be all right?
Rachel: Yeah sure, iced tea would be great.
Rachel: Yeah. Oh I just wish we could not be married for a little bit! Yknow I just wish we could be like on a break!
Rachel: Yes!! I mean sex does not have to be a big deal! There shouldnt be all this rules and restrictions! Yknow, people should be able to sleep with who ever they want, whenever
Phoebe: Oh yeah, the doctor said that could be one of the side effects.
Carol: Ooh, actually Ive been making a list of all the women I know who might be into doing this!
Carol: Oh umm, yknow I think it would be better if we just save it.
Joey: Pretty cool, huh? But if youre thinking you can put a fish in there and it wouldnt get sucked up into the mechanism, well youd be wrong.
Rachel: Okay. (Starts to go.) God yknow, if someone told me a week ago that I would be peeing in Joey Tribbianis apartment
Carol: (opening the door) Susan! Hi! (Whod you think it was gonna be?)
Monica: Im sorry, okay? It justtonight was supposed to be yknow, it was supposed to be a big deal.
Monica: Well, tonight waswas going to be my first time.
Chandler: Yeah! (Takes it.) If-if-if we did do this there would be a lot of pressure on me, yknow? Because youve been waiting a very long time and I wouldnt want to disappoint you.
Chandler: Well, if it helps there were only three. So it would just be for tonight, right?
Monica: Absolutely! It would just be one friend (Points at Chandler) helping out another friend. (Points at herself.)
Phoebe: I thought Id try to take a walk. Would you pour me some water? Ill be back soon.
Ross: Its just, my part seemed to be over pretty quickly and then, and then there was a lot of waiting around.
Joey: But you got to be with both of them, right?
Chandler: Oh yeah! Yeah! Dont worry about me, Ill be fine! (Does a kara-tay move.)
Barry: You-you-you said you were gonna be away all weekend!
Phoebe: Oh, okay I didnt get that message. So this doesnt countAnyway, Ill be in my office.
Phoebe: Oh, so this is all about money! Yknow its bad enough thatOw! Oh, you have got to be kidding!
Ross: Hey! There are some men who will do whatever it takes to make their marriage work! Okay? There are some men who will stand by and-and watch as their wives engage in-in what only can be described as a twosome with some-some woman she barely knows from the gym!
Chandler: Because you shouldnt be with him. (Pause.) You should be with me.
Ross: I'll be fine, alright? Really, everyone. I hope she'll be very happy.
Ross: I don't want to be single, okay? I just... I just- I just wanna be married again!
Rachel: Oh God Monica hi! Thank God! I just went to your building and you weren't there and then this guy with a big hammer said you might be here and you are, you are!
Chandler: (re TV) Ooh, she should not be wearing those pants.
Ross: (choked voice) That'd be good...
Rachel: Please, no, go, that'd be fine!
Monica: Oh, so there is gonna be a fifth date?
Monica: Wait a minute...Joey. Joey you can't ask her out, she's your roommate. It-it'll be way too complicated.
Rachel: You would be too if you found John and David boots on sale, fifty percent off!
Monica: You be okay?
MONICA: Oh, because, um . . .� well, Chandler's going to be home in a couple of days.� So, I thought I would, you know, practice the art of seduction.
Rachel: Ok-dokey, Joey, listen. This is gonna be bridesmaid central, all right? We're gonna have hair and make-up going on in the bathroom and oh, I had to move a couple of things in the fridge to make room for the corsages.
Joey: Man, it must be so cool remembering stuff like that! I don't have any past life memories.
Ross: Yeah. Do that for another two hours, you might be where I am right about now. (He enters.)
Ross: I have no idea. No matter what I do, though, I'm still gonna be a father.
Chandler: Oh, uh, that would be mine. See, I wrote a note to myself, and then I realised I didn't need it, so I balled it up and... (sees that Monica is glaring at him) ...now I wish I was dead.
Ross: (They kiss and the phone rings and machine picks it up, its Ross putting on an accent pretending to be Vicrum) This is Vicrum.
Rachel: Well obviously I wont be able to come, for those of you who havent checked their calendars today is my due date. Well yknow, I just want to take a moment and thank you guys for how great youve been during this time. I really couldnt have done it without you. And I have loved these last nine months! And even though I am so looking forward to the next part, I am really gonna miss being pregnant.
Ross: Well, Carol says she and Susan want me to be involved, but if I'm not comfortable with it, I don't have to be involved.. basically it's entirely up to me.
Rachel: Oh! Man, I never thought I'd be here.. (She leans back onto his hand.)
Phoebe: What a beautiful night to be running around the street, looking for tickets. And the wind sure made it fun.
Carol: Hello? It's not gonna be Helen Geller.
Ross: You- uh- y'know what, I'm gonna go. I don't- I don't think I can be involved in this particular thing right now.
Joey: What are we supposed to be seeing here?
Rachel: Yeah, but if you spent it, it would be like shopping!
Phoebe: It's not mine, I didn't earn it, if I kept it, it would be like stealing.
Rachel: Well, it is, all right? When we were out there today, all I kept thinking was: I can't believe Chandler is screwing this woman, but MAN this would be a nice place to live!
Ross: Yeah, well excuse me for wanting to be with my girlfriend on our anniversary, boy what an ass am I.
Monica: (shouts to Chandler) Chandler? Do you promise to be good?
Phoebe: Ooh, I just pulled out four eyelashes. That can't be good.
All: Yeah! We promise! We'll be good!
Monica: (to all) Okay, please be good, please. Just remember how much you all like me.
Rachel: Oh please, hell be with his real family, the twins and little miss new boobs.
Rachel: Well, no. That's impossible. You can never be too Alan.
Monica: I know.. it's gonna be really hard.
Monica: No, he'll be fine. It's the other five I'm worried about.
Joey: AH HAH! I DID IT! HA HA! Alright... (He takes a box out, about to close fridge, then thinks.) Better take all I can carry. Who knows when i'll be able to get in here again!
(Cut to Joey's apartment. Joey looks inside the cardboard box that used to be the home of Chick Jr. and Duck Jr., but they have disappeared.)
Monica: Are you guys gonna be okay?
Ross: Hey hey, we'll be fine. We're just gonna need a little time.
Monica: -but that wouldn't be fair to me, it wouldn't be fair to Alan- It wouldn't be fair to you!
Rachel: Ooh, I was kinda hoping that wouldn't be an issue... [Scene: Monica's Apartment, everyone is there and watching a Spanish Soap on TV and are trying to figure out what is going on.]
Ross: Yes, yes, fine, that is my penis. Can we be grown-ups now?
Joey: Well, how long do you think it'll be?
Joey: Chandler, I can't be playing games, Ross is gonna be home soon. And I have to write five whole pages if I'm gonna stick to his schedule.
Joey: Yeah and the most important thing is that it wont be some like, stranger up there who barely knows you. Itll be me! And I swear Ill do a really good job. Plus, yknow I love you guys and-and it would really mean a lot to me.
Monica: I'll meet somone else. There'll be other Alans.
Phoebe: Yeah, I dreamt that he saved me from a burning building and he was so brave and so strong! And its making me look at him totally differently. Yknow, I mean he used to be just, yknow Jack Geller Monica and Rosss dad and now hes hes Jack Geller, dream hunk."
Joey: Why do you have to break up with her? Be a man, just stop calling.
Chandler: Oh, yeah. I'd marry him just for his David Hasselhof impression alone. You know I'm gonna be doing that at parties, right? (Does the impression)
Ross: (on phone) Ok, bye. (hangs up) Well, Monica's not coming, it's just gonna be me and Rachel.
Barry: (answering the intercom) Be right there. (To Robbie and Rachel) Be back in a sec.
Monica: ...horribly attractive. I'll be shutting up now.
Phoebe Sr: Well, because youd be giving up a baby, and I-I really dontI dont know if theres anything I can say that could make you understand the pain of giving up a baby. So, umm, (Picks up a puppy in the box next to the couch.)
Ross: Yeah, uh, except for the red sock, which is still red. I'm sorry, please don't be upset, it could happen to anyone.
Janice: Ow. Um, it's just my lens. It's just my lens. I'll be right back.
Chandler: Oh please, could she be more out of my league? Ross, back me up here.
Phoebe: Oh, oh, but y'know, you always see these really beautiful women with these really nothing guys, you could be one of those guys.
Aurora: Don't worry. I imagine he'd be okay with you because really, he's okay with Ethan.
Ross: Oh, Im actually on my way to tell her right now. Yeah, shes been away all week visiting her parents, but shell be cool. I mean, shes been so supportive. She-she even got the baby a tiny T-shirt that says, Fossils are my friends.
Ross: So Pheebs, how long is your mom gonna be with us?
Rachel: No. No, no, I'm not ready! How can I be ready? "Hey, Rach! You ready to jump out the airplane without your parachute?" Come on, I can't do this!
Joey: Oh. Well, the way I see it, the guy's upset here, y'know? I mean, his wife's dead, his brother's missing... I think his butt would be angry here.
Aurora: (getting up and dressing) I'm sorry. He'll be waiting for me.
Rachel: Oh, Joey, you know what, no-one is gonna be able to tell.
Joey: Itll be great! We-we could talk, and play games! Huh? This could be our chance to like renew our friendship.
Ross: But, um... I don't think that's going to be you.
Monica: And that would be?
Rachel: Yes, yes, it does. Okay, look, the restaurant called, they wanna know if you're gonna be showing up for work?
Rachel: Well, the cat... the cat turned out to be Paolo's cat!
Ross: No, no, that's not where I was going. Er, if you get in the... way, of us becoming a thing, then I would be, well, very sad.
Shelley: Question. You're not dating anybody, are you, because I met somebody who would be perfect for you.
Rachel: Um... yeah. Well, I mean, when I first met you, y'know, I thought maybe, possibly, you might be...
Ross: You're gonna be an aunt.
Mr. Geller: I wanna be buried at sea, it looks like fun.
Mr. Geller: Listen to me! When my time comes, I wanna be buried at sea.
Chandler: I'm telling ya! It's gonna happen. Next year it's gonna be you, me and the little Hemingway Bing. (pause) What, he's my favourite author!
Chandler: Yeah, well I dont think you can make that statement, unless youve been kicked in an area that God only meant to be treated nicely.
Chandler: Well, you may wanna rethink the dirty underwear. This is basically the first time she's gonna see your underwearyou want it to be dirty?
Dr. Long: We are moving along, just slowly. (Rachel lies back and sighs.) Dont worry, youre doing great. Ill be back soon. (Exits.)
Mrs. Geller: It really was. Oh, c'mere, sweetheart. (Hugs her) Y'know, I think it might be time for you to start using night cream.
RICHARD: Ooh, then I guess the panty raid last night was totally uncalled for. Ok, I am going to take a shower and today I will be singing Jim Crochee's Leroy Brown.
Ross: (hugs him) And listen, man, if you wanna be gay, be gay. Doesn't matter to me.
Phoebe: Well, just you know, for argument's sake, you know, hypothetically. Which one would you be willing to give up?
Ross: That little naked guy would be me.
Monica: Oh, wow, so you're gonna be one of those "healthy, healthy, healthy guys"?
Chandler: Do you know which one you're gonna be?
Monica: Phoebe, you're gonna be with your grandma?
Phoebe: No, we were just laughing. You know, how laughter can be infectious.
Phoebe: Well, 'cause then they'd be like my mom used to make them, you know, before she died.
Mrs. Geller: No, I'd be hearing about 'Why didn't I get the honey-glazed ham?', I didn't spend enough on flowers, and if I spent more she'd be saying 'Why are you wasting your money? I don't need flowers, I'm dead'.
Chandler: Yeah, sure. What do you need? We got lace, satin, sateen, raffia, gingham, felt, (Pause) and I think my testacles may be in here too.
Ross: Okay, relax, relax. We are gonna be here for a while, it looks like, and we still have boyfriends and your career to cover.
Chandler: Well, my secretary is gonna be out for a couple of weeks. She is having one of her boobs redused. (Ross looks at her.) It's a whole big boob story.
Chandler: Ah, y'see, perfect might be a problem. Had you said 'co-dependent', or 'self-destructive'...
Chandler: Hey, look, I know what it is to be a friend, I just-I just screwed up!
Monica: So what are you gonna be?
Rachel: Well, for your information, Paolo is gonna be in Rome this New Year, so I'll be just as pathetic as the rest of you.
Monica: Ok, right about now the turkey should be crispy on the outside, juicy on the inside. Why are we standing here?
Ross: Okay, so I'm gonna be the only one standing there alone when the ball drops?