words in movies
Rachel: Well, apparently she caught him cheating on her with someone else. Isnt that sad? (Giggles.) God, could you imagine if I actually married him?! I mean how different would my life be?
Ross: I know what you mean, Ive always wondered how different my life would be if-if Id never gotten divorced.
Ross: Id bet Id still be doing my kara-tay. (Thats karate, hes just saying it that way.) Towards the end of our marriage I was doing a lot of kara-tay as a way of releasing the tension from yknow, not doing anything else physical.
Monica: And what if I was still fat? (To Chandler) Well, you wouldnt be dating me, thats for sure.
Chandler: What if I had had the guts to quit my job? Id probably be writing for the New Yorker, getting paid to be funny. But my jobs fun too! I mean tomorrow, I-I dont have to wear a tie.
Ross: Yeah? Oh-oh, shed be so excited!
[Scene: Central Perk, Joey, Fat Monica, and her boyfriend are sitting on the couch. Monicas boyfriend is getting up to get something. For future reference, for the rest of this episode Monicas fat, I wont be calling her Fat Monica throughout.]
Monica: No Joey! Chandler could be your assistant! See, he could answer all of your fan mail and stuff!
Joey: Thats great! That would be great! Lets do that!
Monica: Joey just hired Chandler to be his assistant!
Chandler: Well its kinda hard to be friends with Drake because of his busy schedule and the fact that hes not real.
Joey: All right, heres a list of things for you to do today. Man, this going to be so great! Thank you so much! All right, I got to go to work Im delivering twins today, but only one of them is mine! (Exits.)
Ross: Come on Pheebs, its not that bad! Yknow most people would be excited if they didnt have to work for a couple of weeks.
Ross: will be two months
Phoebe: Roll playing You could be the warden; she could be the prisoner. You could be the pirate; she could be the wench!
Phoebe: Yeah! Or too, you could be two stockbrokers and youre-youre-youre rolling around naked on the trading floor and everybodys watching! (Ross looks at her.) It never happened.
Joey: (entering) Hey! Is uh, is she gonna be all right?
Rachel: Yeah sure, iced tea would be great.
Rachel: Yeah. Oh I just wish we could not be married for a little bit! Yknow I just wish we could be like on a break!
Rachel: Yes!! I mean sex does not have to be a big deal! There shouldnt be all this rules and restrictions! Yknow, people should be able to sleep with who ever they want, whenever
Phoebe: Oh yeah, the doctor said that could be one of the side effects.
Carol: Ooh, actually Ive been making a list of all the women I know who might be into doing this!
Carol: Oh umm, yknow I think it would be better if we just save it.
Joey: Pretty cool, huh? But if youre thinking you can put a fish in there and it wouldnt get sucked up into the mechanism, well youd be wrong.
Rachel: Okay. (Starts to go.) God yknow, if someone told me a week ago that I would be peeing in Joey Tribbianis apartment
Carol: (opening the door) Susan! Hi! (Whod you think it was gonna be?)
Monica: Im sorry, okay? It justtonight was supposed to be yknow, it was supposed to be a big deal.
Monica: Well, tonight waswas going to be my first time.
Chandler: Yeah! (Takes it.) If-if-if we did do this there would be a lot of pressure on me, yknow? Because youve been waiting a very long time and I wouldnt want to disappoint you.
Chandler: Well, if it helps there were only three. So it would just be for tonight, right?
Monica: Absolutely! It would just be one friend (Points at Chandler) helping out another friend. (Points at herself.)
Phoebe: I thought Id try to take a walk. Would you pour me some water? Ill be back soon.
Ross: Its just, my part seemed to be over pretty quickly and then, and then there was a lot of waiting around.
Joey: But you got to be with both of them, right?
Chandler: Oh yeah! Yeah! Dont worry about me, Ill be fine! (Does a kara-tay move.)
Barry: You-you-you said you were gonna be away all weekend!
Phoebe: Oh, okay I didnt get that message. So this doesnt countAnyway, Ill be in my office.
Phoebe: Oh, so this is all about money! Yknow its bad enough thatOw! Oh, you have got to be kidding!
Ross: Hey! There are some men who will do whatever it takes to make their marriage work! Okay? There are some men who will stand by and-and watch as their wives engage in-in what only can be described as a twosome with some-some woman she barely knows from the gym!
Chandler: Because you shouldnt be with him. (Pause.) You should be with me.
Joey: Uh, why, it’s a... (he picks a book up) one of her favorites, uh, (he reads the title of the book) “Riding the Storm Out. Coping with post-partum depression” eesh! (he puts the book back and picks up another) “Love you forever”. Love you forever. By Robert Munsch. Published by Firefly books. Printed (he pauses and changes the tone to a dramatic one) in Mexico. A mother held her new baby and very slowly rocked him back and forth, back and forth, back and forth, and while she held him she sang “I’ll love you forever, I’ll like you for always, as long as I'm living, my baby you’ll be”. (the picture fades and Joey is now finishing the book). And while he rocked her, he sang “I’ll love you forever, I’ll like you for always, as long as I'm living, my baby you’ll be”.
Rachel: But yknow what, if you think its gonna be okay well just work out a system. Yknow, itll be like college, Ill hang a hanger on the door and put a sign, "Come back later, Im gettin lucky." (Laughs.)
Ross: Monica's right, swing dancing can be tricky. I'm gonna use the phone. I gotta cancel those five giant teddy bears I sent to Emily. (Looks at the rose mulch.) My God, think of the massacre.
Rachel: Ross, things aren't gonna be weird between us, right? I mean was that just the stupidest thing, me telling you that?
Dr. Green: This is nice. I pay two hundred dollars for dinner, you put down twenty, and you come out looking like Mr. Big Shot. You really want to be Mr. Big Shot? Here, Ill tell you what, you pay the whole bill, Mr. Big Shot, all right. (rips up the bill, and throws it at Ross, then leaves)
Monica: All right then, go fight for her! Go to London! I mean, that could be you and Emily! (Points to the TV.) That, but-but nicer. Just, go to London!
Joey: Umm, well, what else could it be?
Rachel: Ohh, I'm gonna be on the news!
Rachel: Okay, Phoebe, honey, you gotta be kidding. I mean, you know you cannot keep one of these babies!
Frank: Uh, Delaware. She's on her way though, so until she gets here, I'm gonna be your coach. But don't worry, she told me all about the la-Mazada stuff.
Monica: Hey Rach, maybe your resolution should be to umm, gossip less.
Frank: Hey, y'know, Alice is gonna be here so soon, you couldn't just like do me a favor and like, like hold them in?
Chandler: No, it's not that, I just don't want to be stuck here all night with your fat sister.
Ross: Well, we're applying to a lot of them. Naturally our first choice would be one of the bigger state zoos, y'know, like, uh, San Diego... right? But that might just be a pipe dream, because, y'know, he's out of state. Uh, my vet, uh, knows someone at Miami, so that's a possibility.
Rachel: Monica, this is Dan (points to him), one of the guys that we're gonna be going out with on Saturday. (Mouths "He's yours." to her.) Uh Dan, Monica.
Frank: Come on little Chandler, it's time to be born. Come on little Chandler! Come on!
Phoebe: Yeah. You won't be able to take it.
Chandler: So uh, now that little Chandler turned out to be a girl, what are they gonna name her?
RICHARD: Ok, I have to sleep on the west side because I grew up in California and otherwise the ocean would be on the wrong side.
Ross: Well I'm sorry but you were! Okay? And besides if anyone should be hitting on her it's the guy who's single, the guy that who-who-who can do something about it.
Stage Director: This will be your phone.
Monica: Yeah, I'm sure your ex-wife will be more than happy to move to another country so you can patch things up with your new wife.
Emily: I understand that would be difficult.
Chandler: Why?! I mean if this guy was me and it was me who had learned that it was me who was the best you'd ever had, I'd be going like this. (He jumps up onto the table and starts doing his happy dance.)
Rachel: Yes. Monica, you don't get it. It's bad enough that she's stolen the guy who might actually be the person that I am supposed to be with, but now, she's actually (starting to cry), but now she's actually stealing you.
Monica: Oh hey Joey! We've been watching all day, when are you gonna be on TV?
Joey: Well, why dont you tell me what youre supposed to be! Huh? Because I sure as hell cant figure it out! I talk to you and its nothin. You look at me, and nothin. (He kisses her, more passionately this time) Nothing.
Chandler: Expect it in 4-6 weeks. (She starts to leave.) Umm, hey, umm, Joey's gonna be at the telethon for the rest of the day, we have the whole place to ourselves.
Monica: Well, if we owe it? (She throws down her cleaning stuff and jumps into his arms.) Oh my When is Joey gonna be home?
Monica: Wow, so you guys are, you're never gonna be in the same room together? How is that even gonna work?
Joey: You don't know how long we're gonna be in here! We may have to repopulate the Earth.
Phoebe: I can't ask him! Do you have any idea how inappropriate that would be?! All I'm saying is just talk to Frank. Okay? Just, y'know, feel him out!
Monica: Come here. (He does, and they kiss.) Okay, be right back.
Rachel: Well, I... you know, I-I-I don't know what to say... I mean, I never thought of you as a guy who needed his men to be men. You know, 'cause I gotta tell you Ross, it not like you just came in from branding cattle.
Ross: Oh, Emily that is, that is so great. It's gonna be so great! We're gonna be like-like-like two idiots in love!
Ross: HEY, SHE'S FAST!! OKAY?!! (Chandler is so shocked at Ross's outburst that he drops his spoon and backs up) Oh! You-you think you can be beat me? Let's go! Outside!!
Monica: We're supposed to uh, be spending a romantic weekend together, it-it, what is the matter with you?
Ross: That was going to be my next argument.
Monica: You're not gonna be phased out!
Ross: I talked to Monica, look, I'm the one who made the choice. I'm the one who's making things change, so I should be the one to y'know, step back.
Joey: I have an audition, but Ill definitely hook up with you later. Where are you gonna be around noon?
Chandler: No, Im afraid I wont be able to make love as well as him.
Chandler: Aren't you supposed to be at an audition for another hour?
Ross: Look, if I can just do what Emily wants and get her to New York, I'm sure everything will be fine.
Monica: A Magic Eight ball?! You can't be serious, you can't make this decision with a toy!
Rachel: See? Yeah, you told me the story. He and Monica dated when they broke up they couldn't even be in the same room together and you all promised that you would stay his friend and what happened? He got phased out!
PHOEBE: Yeah. I guess she hasn't seen everything yet. I'll be right back, she has to go to the bathroom again. [Takes Mrs. Green's chin in her hand and says, in Mrs. Adelman's voice] Oh, such a pretty face.
Ross: Of course it is. Yeah, come on in. Ooh-ooh, go by the window you can pretend to be surfing. (He pretends he's surfing by the window.)
Joey: Hey! That must be why I got fired last week! Does this Orson Wells guy direct Burger King commercials?
Ross: To be fair, he doesnt seem to be impersonating Fonzie
Monica: Wow, this is so weird. I just realized this might be the last time we'll all be hanging out together.
Ross: Emily that's ridiculous. Look, I'm-I'm moving for you, I'm cutting friends out of my life for you. Please, just get on the plane and come to New York. Okay, you'll see you're the only person I want to be with.
Phoebe: That game should not be played without my supervision.
Rachel: No, I haven't had a chance to be alone with him yet.
Joey: (on phone) Well, so anyway Beth, what Im saying is I shouldve considered your feelings before I went home with you that night. Ive ah, Ive recently learned whats it like to be on your side of it, and Im sorry. So, do you think you can forgive me? (listens) Great. Thanks. Okay, bye. (He sits down and crosses out something, and dials the phone again.) Hello, Jennifer? (listens) Oh hi, Mrs. Loreo, is Jennifer there? (listens) Oh, shes not home huh? (listens) Well ah, actually I kinda need to talk to you too.
Monica: Well, I guess we won't be warming his house.
Joey: Not a problem. And listen, hey! Since you're gonna be here for a while, why don'tI was thinking we uh, put your name on the answering machine.
Joey: Come on, Chandler, Ross is our friend. He needs us right now, so why don't you be a grown up and come and watch some TV in the fort!
Rachel: Uh, actually, I think I'm gonna be busy.
Chandler: Yeah, you don't want to be stuck with us for the next five weeks.
Ross: When we first met her, she was soaking, her feet were wet! Who wouldnt be miserable? Im telling you when I got her into a dry pair of shoes, she was a totally different person.
Phoebe: Okay, stop! Larry, okay, can't you just be Larry and not Larry the health inspector guy? Y'know I mean it was really exciting at first but now it's like, okay, so where are we gonna eat ever?
Rachel: Okay, that we may be able to do.
Danny: Don't go anywhere, I'll be right back. (He heads off.)
Monica: No, they gave us glasses with lipstick on them! I mean, if they didn't change the glasses, who knows what else they didn't change. (He glares at her.) Come on sweetie, I just want this weekend to be perfect, I mean we can change rooms, can't we?
Ross: Uh, don't you think that would be a little weird? I mean, two guys in a romantic inn...
Chandler: Well, they're Joey's! They gotta be Joey's!
Monica: We'll try to be more careful okay? It's just that, we don't want everyone to know because this is going really well, and maybe the reason it's going really well is because it's a secret.
ROSS: All right I've been feeling incredibly guilty about this, because I wanna be a good friend, and dammit I am a good friend. So just, just shut up and close your eyes (kisses Joey).
Phoebe: This is going to be so much fun! Okay-shhh, I have to finish.
Joey: You guys promised you'd be more careful! I mean, come on! The good Joey name is being dragged through the mud here!
Ross: (whispering in her ear) Oh, thats right! He called to ask out Monica! That-thats gotta be embarrassing!
Rachel: Phoebe, come on! What is the big deal? I thought this was going to be something we could do together! Y'know, I thought it would be fun!
Ross: I don't know. It's going to be weird not having a job for a while, but I, I definitely don't care about my sandwich.
Ross: So it said that by the year 2030, there'll be computers that can carry out the same number of functions as an actual human brain. So theoretically we could download our thoughts and our memories into this computer...
Joey: But sadly I could not be enticed.
MNCA: But I'm gonna be there... for the rest of my life. I mean, I can't break up with him. I'm the one who made him quit drinking. He's dull because of me.
Phoebe: (to the squirrel) Okay, stop tormenting me! This mink! Okay, they're mean! And they hate squirrels! And y'know, okay, most of these probably wanted to be coats! (The squirrel stares at her.) All right, fine, now I get it. (To the clerk.) Here. (She hands him her coat.) You take it. (To the squirrel.) Are you happy now? I'm cold!
Emily: Ohh, I dont think so. I mean it would be different if it was way into the future and-and-and we were getting married or something.
Ross: You-youre gonna get married?! I mean Were gonna be brothers-in-law! (They hug.)
Dennis Phillips: Its an all Chinese cast. Can you be Chinese?
Phoebe: Yeah, yeah, Im going to be out there spreading joy to the people. I mean, last year, I spread a little joy but not really enough. So this year, Im going to do the whole city.
Chandler: See my friend-my friend, Rachel, she wants to be set up.
Monica: Yeah, I mean yeah, I look great. Yeah, I feel great and yeah, my heart is not in trouble anymore! Blah, blah, blah! Y'know I still don't feel like I got him back, y'know? I just want to humiliate him. I wanna, I want him to be like naked and then I'm going to point at him and laugh!
Phoebe: Yeah, but then I can be you sidekick Vunda.
Ross: And it can't be Joey.
RICHARD: Glad to be of help. Matches. [walks out to the balcony]
Ross: (exiting the bathroom) That-that-thats all right, no honey, you take your time sweetie. Ill be right out here. (She slams the door in his face, to the gang) Shes just fixing her makeup.
Chandler: Okay, but be careful okay, because I wanna get our security deposit back.
Phoebe: Yeah, I'm gonna go back to being Street Phoebe. Yeah! Oh but, y'know what? I can't go totally back because Street Phoebe really wouldn't be friends with you guys. Sorry. (Leaves.)
Ross: (quietly) That-that would be incredible. Thank you so much. I-I still can't believe someone ate it!! I mean, look, I left a note and everything.
Ross: And the reason I'm doing this is because I am Joey's friend. And if you were a good friend, you'd be doing the same thing.
Chandler: Could I be more sorry. (Looks at Joey.)
Phoebe: Maybe your resolution is to not make fun of your friends, especially the ones who may soon be flying you to Europe for free on their own plane.
Ross: Just the one divorce in '99! Y'know what, I am gonna be happy this year. I am gonna make myself happy.
Joey: Well, y'know those special skills I have listed on my resume? I would love it would be great if one of those was true.
Joey: Yeah that'd be great! Thanks Pheebs!
Rachel: Op, look! Claire forgot her glasses! And she's gonna be really needing these to keep an eye on that boyfriend, who, I hear, needs to keep his stapler in his desk drawer, if you know what I'm talking about.
Phoebe: Hornswoggle? (To Chandler) Ooh, this must be killing you.
Joey: Whoa-whoa-whoa! Before you start handing out wedding rings and planning bachelor parties, dont you have to decide who your best man is gonna be?