words in movies
[Scene: Amanda's apartment, Ross is arriving with Ben.]
Amanda: Hi Ben!
[Scene: Ben's audition, Carol, Ross, and Ben along with about 10 more families are in a waiting room as Joey enters happily.]
Monica: See? Ben doesn't think you're a loser, he thinks you're a cowboy! Now that's something.
Ross: I know, it's crazy! We were just pushing Ben on the swings
Emily: If anyone asks, well just say Ben addressed them. (Looking through the envelopes.) Oh! So you invited Rachel then?
Ross: Because, because Ive got Ben.
Joey: (quietly) Ive got Ben.
Ross: (to the guys) I gotta go make a fake Ben.
Ross: Ben, say hi to Aunt Monica. (He holds the phone to the fake Ben he has created out of a pumpkin.) Oh, I guess he doesnt feel like talking right now. Hes smiling though! Okay, talk to you later.
Ben: No more pranks.
Ross: Chandler, what kind of an idiot do you take me for? (As he picks up the fake Ben.)
[Scene: Carol and Susans, Rachel is talking with Ben.]
Rachel: Ohhh! Well of course I will watch him! We have fun, dont we Ben? (He nods yes.)
Ben: That you and daddy were not on a break.
Ben: (yelling from off camera) Crap!!
Ben: Yay! (Runs off.)
Ben: (entering) Dad!! (Runs and hugs him.)
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's, Rachel is in the kitchen as Ross and Ben are entering.]
Ross: Yeah? Well, I-I think Bens asleep.
Ross: Hey Im sorry to do this to you again but uh, is there any way you can look after Ben for a little bit? I-Ive got this meeting at school. And-and he-he asked for his uh, Fun Aunt Rachel, so
Ben: What did we just finish talking about Ben?!
Ross: What? (She takes the sign off and hands it to him.) Thats great. That is great. (Crumples up the paper and throws it down in anger.) What did we just finish talking about Ben?!
Ross: All right, thats it! (He runs over to Ben, but he runs past him and out the door.) Comeyouno! You are in big trouble young man!
Ross: Wait! No! Ben, come here! I am not kidding!
[Cut to the hallway, Ben runs upstairs with Ross in pursuit.]
[Scene: Central Park, Ross is teaching Ben how to ride a bike. Chandler, Monica, and Phoebe are they also.]
(At this point a stream of obscenities burst forth from Phoebes mouth just in time for Ben and Ross to enter and hear most of it, and in slow motion Ross tries to shield his innocent son from Phoebes vulgarity.)
Ross: Yeah, well my-my ex-wife and I share custody of Ben and umm, uh, and just so you know, Carol and I are on excellent terms as Im sure you are with your wife! (Realizes) Oh, Im sorry! (To Elizabeth) Its unbelievable!
Ben: (on the bike) Im ready!
Ben: Uh-huh!
Ben: (To Chandler) Thanks daddy.
Ben: (singing) Jingle bells, jingle bells...
Monica: Matt Guire, Mark Lynn, Ben Wire
Ross: (Thinking it over) Sure! (Takes one) Hey, I just found out, I get Ben for the holidays this year.
Rachel: You may need to use this year to teach Ben about Phoebe.
Ben: Christmas eve.
[Scene: Ross's apartment, Ross is whirling Ben around.]
Ben: Santa has reindeers that can fly!
Ben: Christmas.
Ross: Well, I do, so let's... (Ben and Ross sit down on the couch) So, Ben, you uh, you know what holiday is coming up, don't ya?
Ross: Yes, but also (Pauses to let Ben answer, but he doesnt.) Hanukkah! See, you're part Jewish, and-and Hanukkah is a Jewish holiday.
Ben: When is Santa coming?
Ben: No.
Ben: So Santa's coming?
Ben: Santa's mad at me.
Ben: No Santa? Was I bad?
Ross: No! Oh, no-no-no. Hey, you weren't bad, you've been very good, Ben.
Ross: I'm the Holiday Armadillo, your part-Jewish friend. You sent me here to give Ben some presents. Remember?
Ben: (singing) Rudolph, the red-nosed reindeer...
Ben: Texas?
Ross: You're welcome, Ben. Merry Christmas, ooh, and Happy Hanukkah!
[Scene: Monica, Chandler, and Phoebe's, Monica has just opened the door for Ross who is costumed as an Armadillo. Ben is standing next to her.]
Ben: Cool!
Monica: Come on Ben.
Ben: Wow! Thanks!
Ben: Santa! (Runs to Chandler and hugs him)
[Monica and Ben sit down on the couch.]
Ben: No! Why does he have to go?
[Ross turns around and walks back to Ben.]
Ross: Okay Ben, Santa has to go. Say good-bye!
Ross: That's right, Ben. I'm Santa's representative for all the southern states. And Mexico! But, Santa sent me here to give you these presents, Ben. (He tries to bend down to pick up the bag with the presents, but can't because of the costume) Maybe the Lady will help me with these presents.
Ben: (answering him) Eight whole days.
[Scene: Monica, Chandler, and Phoebe's, Santa (Chandler), Superman (Joey), Ben, and Monica are listening to the Holiday Armadillo (Ross) finish telling the story of Hanukkah.]
Ben: Awesome!
Ben: Okay, Santa!
Ben: No! Why can't the Armadillo leave? I want Santa!
Chandler: Well, I'm here to see my old buddy Ben. What are you doing here, weird turtle-man?
Ben: Did you bring me any presents, Santa?
Chandler: Hey! (Grunts as Ben hits him at full speed.)
Rachel: Ben, its Rachel! (He closes the door.) But whatever.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's apartment. Phoebe is watching Bert and Ernie with Ben.]
(Ben starts to go, but Ross stops him.)
Ross: (to Ben) Okay! All clear!
Ross: Thats right! Wait no, Ben.
Ross: (to Ben) Everything okay in there?
Ben: Not really.
Ben: Dont talk to me now!
Rachel: Hi! Hi Ben!
Ross: Well, Ben would be there.
Ben: Bye dad.
Ben: Okay.
Ben: (running to the bathroom) Thanks Phoebe!
Ben: Hi.
Ben: Ill be okay.
Ross: Yes! Ben learned a little trick.
Ben: Whats a virgin?
Ben: Im not allowed to have soda.
Ben: Really? Like how?
Ben: Cause you guys were on a break.
Ben: But youre not anymore!
Rachel: Ben yknow when uh, when you were a baby, you and I used to hang out all the time. Cause I was, I was your daddys girlfriend.
Rachel: Yeah, I-I-I-Im funny Ben, but Im not stupid. Okay?
Ben: Yeah, youre funny.
Ben: (laughs) Thats a good one.
Ben: Can I do it to you?
Rachel: I found him! (To Ben) Very funny, come here! (She sits down on the coffee table and Ben walks up.) That is exactly why Ive come here to talk to you okay?
Ben: (jumping up from behind her chair) Gotcha!! (Rachel jumps up startled.)
Carol: Hey Rachel! (The camera cuts to her face and we see that Ben pulled the quarter trick with her as well.)
Ben: (mimicking her) Remember all that stuff I taught you yesterday?
Rachel: Well yknow I was just in the neighborhood and I passed by your building and I thought to myself, "Whats up with Carol and sweet, little Ben?"
Ben: Oh crap!