words in movies
Joey: What are you talking about? 'One woman'? That's like saying there's only one flavor of ice cream for you. Lemme tell you something, Ross. There's lots of flavors out there. There's Rocky Road, and Cookie Dough, and Bing! Cherry Vanilla. You could get 'em with Jimmies, or nuts, or whipped cream! This is the best thing that ever happened to you! You got married, you were, like, what, eight? Welcome back to the world! Grab a spoon!
Monica: I know. Lets try a look of far off wonderment. Okay, well-well gaze into our future and well think about our marriage and the days to come. (Chandler is still not getting it.) Chandler! What is the matter with your face?! I mean this picture is supposed to say "Geller and Bing to be married," not "Local woman saves drowning moron!" (The photographer laughs.) Hey! Dont laugh at him! Hes my drowning moron!
Chandler: All right everybody, I know that it's Christmas Eve and you'd rather be with your families, but there's *no* call (he takes it off) for writing "Screw you, Mr. Bing!" on the back of my chair! (he looks at it) -- By the way, you can all call me Chandler.
Chandler: Oh, that's ok.I'll just try and reschedule. (on the phone) "Hi, this is Chandler Bing. I made a reservation there and I need to change it (pause) Oh, what do you mean it's not refundable? Can I just come some other time? (pause) Oh, can't you make an exception?"
Doug: So, in conclusion, the lines all go up (points to the chart), so Im happy. Great job team! Tomorrow at 8:30. (They start to leave) Phil! Nice job. (smacks him on the butt) Stevens! Way to go! (smacks him on the butt) Joel-burg, you maniac! I love ya! (smacks him on the butt) (Chandler walks up) Bing! Good job, couldnt have done it without ya. (he shakes his hand)
Mrs. Bing: There y'go. Ross?
Chandler: Here's the thing, Janice. You know, I mean, it's like we're different. I'm like the bing, bing, bing. You're like the boom, boom, (Chandler flails his hand out and hits Janice in the eye)... boom.
Mrs. Bing: Oh, you watched the show! What'd you think?
Mrs. Bing: Who's doing shots?
Mrs. Bing: What is with you tonight?
Mrs. Bing: Oooh, c'mon, shut up, it's fun. Gimme a hug. (They both sit down) Well, I think we're ready for some tequila.
Mrs. Bing: (on TV) ...I just get this craving for Kung Pow Chicken.
Paolo: Ah! Nora Bing!
Mrs. Bing: She's supposed to be with you.
[Cut to Mrs. Bing on the telephone.]
Mrs. Bing: Yeah, any messages for room 226?
Mrs. Bing: (on TV) Oh no, I am a fabulous mom! I bought my son his first condoms.
Mrs. Bing: Alright, well, be good, I love you. (Kisses him and goes to leave)
Mrs. Bing: You okay, kiddo?
Mrs. Bing: No, it's you!
Mrs. Bing: No, really, c'mon. You're smart, you're sexy...
Mrs. Bing: He's not a hero. ...You know who our hero is.
Mrs. Bing: Alright. (Kisses him)
Mrs. Bing: Mr. Geller.
Janice: No, it isn't, because you won't let that happen. Don't you know it yet? You love me, Chandler Bing.
Mrs. Bing: No. Because I know how to write men that women fall in love with. Believe me, I cannot sell a Paolo. People will not turn three hundred twenty-five pages for a Paolo. C'mon, the guy's a secondary character, a, y'know, complication you eventually kill off.
Mrs. Bing: You are gonna be fine, believe me.
Rachel: Chandler Bing? It's time to see your thing.
PHOEBE: I miss Janice though. "Hello, Chandler Bing."
Rachel: Mrs. Bing, I have to tell you, I've read everything you've ever written. No, I mean it! I mean, when I read Euphoria at Midnight, all I wanted to do was become a writer.
Mrs. Bing: I am famished. What do I want... (Looks at Chandler's menu)
MR. DOUGLAS: Uh, listen Bing, I received your memo. So, we're not gonna receive the systems report until next Friday?
JANICE: Is it yours? Ha! You wish, Chandler Bing. You are looking at a married lady now.
Mrs. Bing: You okay there, slugger?
Mrs. Bing: Oh honey! This is so exciting! I thought we screwed you up so bad this day would never come. Oh and just think. Soon therell be lots of little Bings. (He freaks out and loosens the tie again.)
MNCA: [to Chandler] Yo, Bing. Racquetball in 15 minutes.
Chandler: Hey! I will have you know that... aah, who am I kidding. Let's call the kid Geller and let Bing die with me.
Mrs. Bing: (Reentering) O-kay. Look, it, it was stupid.
SUSIE: Chandler Bing?
Chandler: I'm telling ya! It's gonna happen. Next year it's gonna be you, me and the little Hemingway Bing. (pause) What, he's my favourite author!
Mrs. Bing: Really stupid. And I don't even know how it happened. I'm sorry, honey, I promise it will never happen again. Are we okay now?
JOEY: Yeah Bing, what's that about?
(bing, bong)
(the computer bing, bongs)
Janice: Good-bye Chandler Bing. (walks out with one shoe)
Mrs. Bing: (To phone) Okay, thank you. (To Ross) It's the Italian Hand-Licker, isn't it.
Mrs. Bing: (on TV) Oh, fine. I'm leaving for New York tomorrow, which I hate- but I get to see my son, who I love...
Santos: Hello, Mr. Bing.
Joanna: Bing! Thats a great name.
Mrs. Bing: Oh, Ross, listen to me. I have sold a hundred million copies of my books, and y'know why?
Doug: (turning around) Bing! You got those numbers for me?
Rachel: (introduces them) Joanna, this is my friend Chandler Bing (to Chandler) Joanna.
Chandler: Oh its Bing, sir. Im sorry , I was just ah...
[Scene: The Bing household, Mr. and Mrs. Bing and Young Chandler are eating Thanksgiving dinner as a housekeeper serves them.]
Doug: (coming out of his office) Dartmouth? Who went to Dartmouth? Dartmouth sucks. Did you go to Dartmouth Bing?
Rachel: Chandler gets it! Its Chandler Bing!
Doug: No-no, I heard what you said, funny. I like funny. (Chandler starts to leave) This team is about hard work, but its also about having fun. Good to have you aboard Bing! (smacks him on the butt, and Chandler leaves shocked.)
Janice: Well, I gotta buy a vowel. Because, oh my Gawd! Who, would've thought that someday, Chandler Bing would buy me a drawer.
Chandler: Well lets see, there was the guy with the ferrets, thats plural. The spitter. Oh-ho, and yes, the guy that enjoyed my name so much he felt the need to make a little noise every time he said it. Nice to meet you, Chandler Bing Bing! Great apartment Chandler Bing, Bing!
Mrs. Bing: Now Chandler dear, just because your father and I are getting a divorce it doesn't mean we don't love you. It just means he would rather sleep with the house-boy than me.
Nurse: Mr. Bing? (Chandler jumps up) Here you are! You'll go into that room and deposit your specimen into the container.
Doug: Well, say no more. Y'know it takes guts to bring this up. Bing! Youre okay.
Ross: Correct! What is Chandler Bings job?
Phoebe: Oh, Jack Bing. I love that. Ooh, it sounds like a '40s newspaper guy, you know? "Jack Bing, Morning Gazette. I'm gonna blow this story wide open!"
Monica: Y'know what really bothers me? Isit's how-how different you act around them! I mean y'know the throwing the tennis games, the fake laugh, the "I'll see you around, Bing!" "Not if I see you first, Doug!" (Mocks the fake laugh.) I gotta tell you, I don't like Work Chandler. Okay? The guy's a suck-up.
Joey: So, youre just Bing?
Chandler: Two. This photographer, who seemed really dull. And this actor guy, who Im not sure about, because when he called and I answered the phone Chandler Bing, he said Whoa-whoa, short message.
Chandler: (Answering the phone at work) Hello, Chandler Bing.
Kara: Nice to meet you Monica. Bing! (Slaps Chandler on his butt.)
Chandler: Yes! Chandler Bing, 7! Chandler Bing, 0.
Joey: (In a high pitched female voice) Hello Mr. Bing...I love you.
Doug: Bing!
Doug: Say uh, Bing, did you hear about the new law firm we got working for us?
Doug: Uh Bing, I think we're gonna make this the last game.
Doug: Well, I gotta tell ya Bing; that partner of yours is a real tiger. (To his wife.) Are you all right sweethart?
Doug: The joke Bing. What's the matter with you?
Chandler: (on machine) This is Chandler Bing! This is Chandler Bing! (The machine beeps off.)
Monica: Hi honey. We just got a wedding gift from Bob and Faye Bing; they dont like us do they? (They gave them a pok-a-dotted punch bowl.)
Jay Leno: (on TV) Folks, when we come back we'll be talking about her new book, 'Euphoria Unbound': the always interesting Nora Tyler Bing. You might wanna put the kids to bed for this one.
Doug: (entering) Uh, I gotta apologize for Kara's coffee. Y'know, I feel sorry for it if it ever got in a fight, it's not strong enough to defend itself. (Chandler does not laugh.) Did you hear what I said Bing?
Doug: Bing! (Chandler stands bolt upright and turns around to face him.) Read your Computech proposal, a real homerun. (He goes to slap his butt, but Chandler slides over making him miss.) Ooh. Barely got ya that time, get over here. Come on. (Chandler goes over) Wham! (slaps him on the butt) Good one. That was a good one. (to a couple of Chandlers co-workers) Keep at it team. (goes into his office)
Chandler: Theres a Mr. Bing!
Chandler: (on phone) This is Chandler Bing! This is Chandler Bing! (Listens) Yes, the groomNo! Not the groom!!
Chandler: Oh yeah, it's so cool. (He opens his coat and has it pinned to the lining.) Now I gotta go, Officer Bing has gotta, 10-100. (Pause, softly) That's pee-pee. (Heads for the bathroom.)
Chandler: (she opens the door) Julie hi! Chandler Bing, I, I guess you remember me.
"Whenever I get married, guess who wont get to sing? Somebody named Geller! And somebody else named Bing!"
Chandler: Bing doesn't seem so weird now, does it?
Chandler: Hey, you know what I was thinking? When we get married, are you gonna change your last name to Bing?
Monica: I'm sorry. But not that sorry, 'cause you don't have to live with it. Um, we have a reservation under the name Chandler Bing.
MONICA: Oh, that's there on the bottom, see the manager, Chandler Bing.
Chandler: Mr. and Mrs. Bing! (Walks away.)
Mrs. Bing: Dont you have a little too much penis to be wearing a dress like that?
Monica: Hi Mr. Bing.
Mr. Bing: (entering) Hello all!
Mr. Bing: Our little boy is getting married.
Mrs. Bing: Charles.
Ross: Hi! (To Mrs. Bing) Hi! (Mr. Bing starts rubbing his arm.) Hi. Has umm, anyone seen Chandler?
Mr. Bing: But that was after the wedding, its not bad luck then.
Mrs. Bing: Chandler!
Monica: Mrs. Bing? Here, these are my parents umm, Judy and Jack Geller.
[Scene: The Hotel, Monicas room, Mr. and Mrs. Bing are staring at each other while Phoebe looks on.]