words in movies
Mr. Waltham: I-I was wondering, my niece you see is in from Londonwell Shropshire really but yknowwell shes about your age I say. Anyway I have tickets for the opera, Die Fledermaus, and I was wondering if youd like to keep her company this evening?
Joshua: But, I was curious; do you have any plans for tonight?
Joshua: Kidding! (Rachel is relived) Im gonna get there early, but Im going to put you on the V.I.P list, okay? Look for me.
Rachel: Ohh, its Joshua invited me to this fancy club opening tonight. But, I already told Mr. Waltham that I would take his niece to this dumb old opera. So What are you gonna do?
Phoebe: I would, but I get my morning sickness in the evening.
Rachel: Well, I didnt see Joshua last night, but I did punch a girl in the face.
Rachel: The whole night was horrible, it was pouring down rain, and when I got there, there was no Rachel Green on the list, but there was a Rachel Greep.
Rachel: No, there is no Rachel Greep, but then this other girl overheard us and she was all, "Im Rachel Greep! Im Rachel Greep!" and he let her right in.
Rachel: No, she was already in, but then this big bitch behind me tried to steal my umbrella, so I clocked her. Ohhh! I cant believe this, all I wanted was a few hours outside of work to see Joshua, so he can go ahead and start falling in love with me.
Joey: Yknow, I can see why you think that, but ah, actually, you know who I think it is?
Joey: Yeah-yeah, Im one of the cops that wont work with you cause you a lose cannon. Anyway, look, Im really sorry, but I stink!
Charlton Heston: I dont know one actor worth his salt that didnt say at one time or another, "God, I stink!" Hell, I just did a scene out there, first take, I stunk the place up. But, the important thing you must remember, no matter how badly you think you might stink, you must never, ever bust into my dressing room and use my shower! Do you understand me?!
Phoebe: Oh no! Wait! Wait! Okay, yknow what, you were right, you were right. We really werent great at being guys, but you know why? Because were girls.
Chandler: Look, forget it. We tried, but Phase Three is a lost cause, Okay? Those strippers were insanely hot, and I couldnt picture myself with any of them. (Sits back in disgust.)
Chandler: I know, I know, but youre gonna have plenty of chances. There are literally thousands of women out there just waiting to screw me over.
Ross: But now! Im there! Im totally there! Im-Im finally where you are!
Chandler: What do you want from me, Ive never met the guy. So anyway, Rachel, Im sorry you cant stay, (Rachel is upset about leaving the orgy with the cigarette guy.) but the rest of us have a lot of work to do. (The cigarette guy starts rubbing Chandlers back.) What are you doing? (The guy just nods) All right, listen, Ive got to wake up!
Phoebe: Okay, but you cannot tell him... but look whose back!
Chandler: But we dont know the neighbors.
Rachel: Oh, come on now, dont keep me waiting. Get those clothes off! But, I would keep that helmet on because youre in for a rough ride! (He backs into the door.)
Joey: Uh well yeah, that was the plan, but by the time I got to it there was only a couple of pieces left!
Rachel: Well, youve been here for two months now and your boss is required to hand in a performance evaluation. But yknow, there is one thing that I have yet to evaluate. (She turns around and sweeps the stuff off of her desk and hops up onto it.)
Rachel: Op, but the twelfth brings a lovers spat.
Phoebe: Not that way! But the bike brought you a lot closer!
Phoebe: (starts to leave, but stops) Oh and Chandlers about to cry.
Chandler: I am sorry, but some of us have to get up early and go to work! (Monica looks at him) (To Monica) He does not know that I am not some of us.
Monica: Umm, listen I am sorry, but Ill put some out first thing in the morning.
Joey: Yeah-yeah I like that but just to go in another direction
The Woman: Hi! Im sorry, I know its after hours but I really need candy.
Monica: Some people have been saying its yknow little drops of heaven, but whatever.
Monica: But they like it!
Monica: Oh, you really want to talk about getting people to like you huh, funny man? (Joey laughs but stops when Chandler turns to glare at him.)
Monica: Oh my God. (Grabs Phoebe and turns her away) Phoebe. Don't look now, but behind us is a guy who has the potential to break our hearts and plunge us into a pit of depression.
Ross: I know. I know. But, can we please try it again? Huh? I mean, you were so close Phoebe!
Monica: Absolutely! (He goes to kiss her, but she stops him and rubs his head and says...) Now get out of here you!! (Pete leaves) (to the gang) Okay, Im running out of places I can touch him! Look, is there something wrong with me? I mean why am I only attracted to guys where theres no future? Either theyre too old, or theyre too young, and then theres Pete whos-whos crazy about me, and whos absolutely perfect for me, and theres like zip going on! I mean, seriously, does it sound like somethings wrong with me?!
(They start towards the door but are stopped when Mr. Zelner enters.)
Joey: (Confused.) But, he loves Emily?
Ross: No, I mean, look I dont know if anything is going to happen with us, again. Ever. But I dont want to know that it-it never could. So I stopped it and she got mad and broke my projector.
Monica: Im fine now, but it was really scary there for a while. I mean, someone slipped a-a threatening note under the door.
Ross: Nope. I mean, I know Susan does every year, but I think I wanna take this year to teach him all about Hanukkah.
Monica: Well, no. But, um, I bet she probably does.
Chandler: What are you talking about? The couch is perfectly in line with the carpet. And then I can just walk over here and casually just put my feet right up on the...(Tries to rest his feet on the coffee table but they won't reach) OK, OK, here's what we do, we just uh, move the couch closer to the coffee table.
Phoebe: Okay. So, this wire is connected to this wire which plugs into here. (She points at each as she says it.) Okay so, to get the beeping to stop all I have to do (She picks up a shoe and proceeds to pummel the smoke detector. She then gets up and heads to bed, stops, quickly turns around, and is satisfied that the beeping has stopped.) Well done, Pheebs. (She resumes her trek to bed, but is stopped at the entrance to the hallway by the now steady and extremely loud tone emanating from the smoke detector.) (Yelling.) What do you want from me?!!!!!!!
Phoebe: Yes, but I wanted you to want to live with me, but okay, if you're having so much fun over here
Joey: Thanks. Thanks, but uh actually its just gonna be me again tonight.
Tag: It's weird. I always used to assume, that I would meet someone and fall in love and be happy and all that was just a given. But lately it's like what if it's not. Do you ever have that feeling?
Ross: Thank you, but, but you gotta leave.
Ross: I'm sorry, Chandler but this, this is really important to me.
Rachel: Yeah, they said he's gonna be fine, but he's still heavily sedated.
Ross: Well yeah, but she doesnt know that. I mean, the last time she saw you-you wouldve turned one of those little wedding chairs into kindling.
Chandler: But we should take it.
Rachel: But we should move quick.
Joey: Yeah. I realized it about a half-hour ago but I didn't want to say anything 'cause I didn't want to jinx it.
Monica: Okay, heres batch 22. Ohh, maybe thesell taste a little like your grandmothers. This has a little bit of orange peel, but no nutmeg.
Rachel: Thats also the smaller piece. (Puts the piece onto a plate.) Okay, there you go. Enjoy your half my friend, but that is it. No sharing. No switching, and dont come crying to me if you eat your piece to fast. (As shes saying that she is backing out the door, when she finishes she turns around to return to her place, stumbles and drops the cheesecake on the floor.) Oh!!!!
David: Oh, I hate this but I-I-I have to go. I-I cant miss my flight.
Monica: Yeah but it was because I-I had an eye exam and I dont like my new eye doctor.
Rachel: Yeah, I went to a wedding once where they had swing music and uh, two months later the couple got divorced. And now Im not saying that theres any connection here yknow, but they did tell me thats why they got divorced.
Chandler: But I love swing music!
Monica: Yeah. But of course we had to update it a little bit. (To Ross) Hey, by the way, great thinking about catching me!
Tag: Rach, Im sorry, but you didnt give me any contracts!
Chandler: All right! Fine! But its just a lunch date, no more than an hour! And from now on I get my own dates, I dont want you setting me up with anybody ever again!
Phoebe: Fine! (She takes the blanket.) But please God; tell me how to stop them from going off!
Phoebe: Okay, I understand why Superman is here, but why is there a porcupine at the Easter Bunnys funeral?
Chandler: Well, youre not gonna believe this, but if you have seven minutes
Rachel: But dont you think Rosita wouldve wanted you to move on? I mean yknow, she did always put your comfort first.
Mr. Geller: I dont know. They-they must be your mothers, but please, please dont ask her. Ill throw these away. (He puts them in his pocket as Ross finds something of interest in one of his boxes.)
David: Uh, I-I-I was hoping to run into you here. I didnt know whether I should call or not, yknow I-I was only in town for a few days. And yknow, I didnt want to intrude on your life or-or anything like that, but I-I really wanted to see you andbut I didnt know if you wanted to see me.
Tag: Okay! Feel free to look, but Im telling you those contracts are not on this desk.
Monica: So wait, Rosss stuff is fine, but I have no memories because you wanted to keep the bottom two inches of your car away from water!!!
Chandler: Yeah, Id love to but Ive tried that so many times they wont even let me in the store anymore.
Rachel: Well, its a long story, but umm I broke Joeys chair
RACHEL: I know. And Mom, I realize you and Daddy were upset when I didn't marry Barry and get the big house in the suburbs with all the security and everything, but this is just so much better for me, you know?
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's, breakfast is finished but Rachels still down.]
Phoebe: Yeah, but you shouldnt compare yourself to me.
Ross: That's right, Ben. I'm Santa's representative for all the southern states. And Mexico! But, Santa sent me here to give you these presents, Ben. (He tries to bend down to pick up the bag with the presents, but can't because of the costume) Maybe the Lady will help me with these presents.
Rachel: Really! God Ross, what were you thinking? (To Phoebe, quietly) I know its really shallow, but a part of me wants him again.
Joey: But it hurts my Joeys Apple.
Tag: And I never used to be able to just talk to girls in bars, but I got like 20 phone numbers last night.
Erica: Yeah, I read some great applications, but then I thought “who better then a minister to raise a child!”
Supervisor: Theyre always going to tell you they dont need toner, but thats okay because whatever they say, you can find the answer to it here in this script.
Joey: Yep. (Starts for Monicas room, but Chandler stops him.)
Tag: It wasnt on your list, but hopefully youll think its really fun.
Rachel: Okay, but taking care of a drunk, naked woman seems like a job for Joey.
(Joey starts to walk away, but stops.)
Rachel: Yeah, it is! But youre just a kid! I mean youre 25!
Tag: Wait! I think I see where youre going, but before you say anything else, can I just say one more thing? (Kisses her.)
Rachel: Ohh Tag, umm youre such a great guy and we have sooo much fun together but I dont-I dont
Kristen: Well Joey doesnt like to talk about it but, hes one of the stars of Days Of Our Lives.
Rachel: Well said. And a uh good example of the fun I was referring to uhh, but I just think Im past the point where I think I can yknow, just have fun.
Joey: Yes, but in Drake Remorays body. (Ross laughs unbelievably.) Why is this so hard for you to get? I thought you were a scientist!
Jessica Lockhart: (crying) Oh, my baby! (Hugs Dina, but moves Dinas head to her other shoulder so that shes the only one in the picture.)
Rachel: Uh-huh! Nice try, but you dont get that chair anymore! All right? That is my chair now! You can sit on my lap! (Joey starts to get up.) No I take that back!
Mr. Geller: Well, I dont know whats in the boxes down here, but I do know there are six or seven Easy Bake Ovens in the attic.
Cecilia: All right Joey, I will help you. Not because I-I owe it to this stupid show, but because I owe it to Jessica.
Cecilia: Yeah but Jessica doesnt have an English accent.
Cecilia: But Well now, nows a different time for me. (Starts to cry.)
Rachel: (fake disappointment) All right. All right Phoebe I will let you have him, but you owe me; you owe me big!
Rachel: (turning and looking at Tom again) No-no they do but, you just have to wait.
Cecilia: Id love to, but my lawyer said I cant do that anymore.
Rachel: Oh wow! (She takes a bite, but holds the sandwich vertically so that the stuff falls out.)
Cecilia: Well of course not, but you were very good.
(Ross hesitates then leans down trying to get her to kiss his cheek, but she moves his head around and kisses him on the lips again.)
(Ben starts to go, but Ross stops him.)
Rachel: Ben, its Rachel! (He closes the door.) But whatever.
Chandler: Guys thank you very much but neither of you is marrying us.
Emily: (on answering machine) Hello Ross? It's Emily. (Rachel runs back into the room with the tequila.) I know this is out of the blue but uh, I'm getting married tomorrow. Well, maybe I am. I keep thinking about you and I'm wondering if-if we made a mistake giving up so fast. Are you thinking about me? Of course you're not, but if you are, call me tonight. Okay, bye.
Ben: But youre not anymore!
Chandler: No, but Horny for Monica Minister called, wanting to know if we were still together.
Rachel: Yeah, I-I-I-Im funny Ben, but Im not stupid. Okay?
Monica: (hands the tape back to Joey, but doesnt let him grab it) Yknow maybe a little bit!
Chandler: Yknow its funny I started it but, now its scary me. So could you come out here please?
Monica: Oh. I guess you can. Okay but; I-I have to return it, so you cant like it.
Monica: Yeah but Im not keeping it.
Monica: Okay! But you cant rip it. Well, maybe a little.
Chandler: Oh thats great! Great! Thanks! But that dress I mean its like yuck! Its terrible! It makes me wanna just rip it right off of you!
Ross: Yeah, laugh all you want but in ten minutes were gonna have younger looking skin!