words in movies
Chandler: Thats great!
Chandler: So you kissed her, so what happened after that?
Chandler: So shes just waiting over there for ya?
Chandler: (entering) Oh hey Rachel, sweetheart? You have got to tell the post office that you have moved. Okay? We are still getting all your bills and stuff. (Hands her all of her bills and stuff.)
Rachel: Oh-oh, Pottery Barn! (Grabs the aforementioned catalog and holds the rest back out to Chandler.) You can throw the rest away.
Chandler: Im not your garbage man. Im your mailman.
Chandler: A pharmacist. (Rachel mocks him.)
Chandler: You took off your pants and climbed under the sheets!
Chandler: You made pottery?
Chandler: Ahh, just like the apothecary tables of yore
[Scene: The Hallway between the apartments, Joey, Janine, Chandler, and Monica are returning from a double date. Chandler is telling a joke.]
Chandler: so then the farmer says, "Thats not a cow and youre not milking it." (Everyone laughs.)
Monica: I am so glad you guys got together, Chandler and I are always looking for a couple to go out with and now we have one!
Chandler: Look at us, were a couple of couples!
Joey: And Chandler I cant believe I let you pay for this one. (They hug and he whispers in his ear.) Thanks man.
Joey: Nope-op! I insist! (He hugs Chandler again and whispers to him.) You get the wine right?
Chandler: Yeah all right. (They part.) Okay, good night guys.
Joey: What-whats wrong with Monica and Chandler?
[Scene: Joey and Janines, Joey is pacing around as Chandler and Monica enter.]
Chandler: And here is the bottle of wine for you to bring over tonight. (Hands it to him.) You were also going to buy Monica flowers but you couldnt afford it, because you paid dinner last night.
Chandler: Oh thats too bad.
Janine: (entering from her room) Monica! Chandler! Im really-really sorry about tonight. I dont know if Joey told you; I just couldnt get out of going to this play. Im sorry. Have a great time.
Chandler: Thats funny, I saw no phlegm.
Chandler: Then why-why is she going to a play?!
Chandler: Well, why does she not want to hang out with us?!
Chandler: So she was just pretending to have a good time last night? She was lying to our faces?!
Chandler: And I am not blah, I am a hoot!
Chandler: No, you shNo you said you made that up!!
Chandler: Eh, theyre both good. I generally just go with, Monicas drunk again. (Monica glares at him.)
Chandler: Okay.
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Monica and Chandler are sitting at the kitchen table.]
Chandler: Okay, one more time.
Monica: Chandler, would you like some more orange juice?
Chandler: Perfect decibel.
Chandler: Hey.
Chandler: Oh nothing, were just talking. Yknow, blah-blah-blah.
Monica: We didnt give you any money! (Chandler is motioning, "No!")
[Scene: The hallway, Joey, Janine, Monica, and Chandler are returning from their second date.]
Chandler: Thats totally understandable.
Chandler: Oh yeah!
Chandler: And Im blah? Listen, the only thing more boring than watching modern dance is having to listen to you talk about it, (Imitating her) "Oh Chandler, I just lost myself in the moment."
Joey: All right! All right! Enough! Enough! Enough!! Enough! (To Chandler and Monica) You two go home! I-I-I gotta talk to Janine! (They start to leave.)
Chandler: (To Monica) Yknow I think you can take her.
(Joey and Chandler both come into the hallway.)
Chandler: Did you hear that?
Chandler: Yeah, Im sorry man. (Pause) You wanna go watch?
[Scene: Central Perk, Ross, Chandler, and Monica are there as Joey enters.]
Chandler: Hey so, did uh, did she move out?
Chandler: You okay?
Chandler: I cant believe she cracked your code!
(Chandler agrees in an absolutely bored way.)
Chandler: Oh my God! Oh my God!
Chandler: Hes right. Nobodys gonna benefit, and youre just gonna hurt her.
Chandler: You know, I don't get this. A month ago, these people were my friends. You know, just because I'm in charge doesn't mean I'm a different person.
Chandler: Why is Phoebe singing to Carl Mulden?
CHANDLER: You'll see, you guys are all gonna go off and get married, and I'm gonna end up alone. Will you promise me something? When you're married, will you invite me over for holidays?
Chandler: Oh, thats mature.
Chandler: Ha-ha-ha. A little to hard. What am I not ah, boyfriend material?
Chandler: Off?!!
Chandler: Is it just me, or can you actually see his abs through his overcoat?!
Chandler: Nothing, nothing.
[Cut to Monica's bedroom, Chandler slowly closes the door, and we hear Rachel from the living room.]
Chandler: (to Joey) He has sex, and we get hit in our heads.
Chandler: She was not good. Not good.
Chandler: Yeah, well, I guess they had a fight, and he got drunk....
Chandler: Uh-oh.
Chandler: Ladies, ladies, lets just compromise okay? Phoebe, Rachel take off Monicas bra.
Chandler: Pierce Brosnan?
Monica: Chandler!!
Chandler: Okay, now lets decide who has the nicest ass.
Chandler: At least let me smoke it to the good part.
Chandler: Thats a bad duck!!! (to Ross) Howd the thing go tonight, Ross?
[Joey walks up helping Chandler.]
Chandler: I think she looks cute. (Rachel turns around and stares at him angrily) ... but I am wrong!
Chandler: ....And then I just, you know, threw the bag of barley at her, and ran out of the store.
Chandler and Joey: Hey!!
Chandler: Oh, this is horrible, its just horrible.
Chandler: Nobody is opening anything ok? Look, I dont know about you guys, but I wanna see the look on Monicas face when I give her my present, and Im sure she wants to see the look on my face when I get mine. So please, please, can we just, can we put them back?
Chandler: Oh no, now its not gonna make any sense!
Chandler: So, what are you doing here? I thought tonight was your big anniversary dinner.
Chandler, Phoebe, and Joey: No, I wasnt gonna ask you that, no.
Chandler: Y'know what, I can handle it, handles my middle name. Actually its the ah, middle part of my first name.
CHANDLER: Yeah, Karen. I'm thinking about having an affair with her. Oh, you know what? I just did.
Gunther: (to Chandler) Oh, no-no, no-no-no, theres none of that in here.
Chandler: Oh come on man! At least let me finish this last one.
(Chandler enters with a cigarette.)
Chandler: (picking up a plastic cup similar to the one he deposited his specimen in) It is not okay that I'm aroused by this now.
Chandler: Okay, thats like the least fun game ever.
Chandler: No-no, why dont you hang on to that one.
Chandler: Okay.
(Chandler hands him the cigarette, and he takes a long drag.)
[Scene: In Phoebes Grandmothers cab, driving up to the cabin. Phoebes driving, Rachels sitting shotgun, Chandler, Monica, and Joey are in the back seat.]
Chandler: Or what my Father called Thursday night.
Chandler: Always illegal Joe.
Chandler: Y'know, I wouldve bet good money that hed be the first one of us to get married.
Chandler: If that doesnt keep kids in school, what will?
(Both Chandler and Phoebe have shocked looks on their faces.)
[Scene: Chandlers bedroom, Chandler is listening to the hypnosis tape.]
[Scene: At Chandler and Joey's. Ross and Chandler are there. Ross is watching wrestling.]
Chandler: She was.... But y'know what, just in case, maybe we should come up with a set of ground rules.
Chandler: Thanks
Chandler: This guy invented Moss 865! Every office in the world uses that program!
Chandler: Y'know what, pretty good.
Chandler: What check thing?
Chandler: There you go!!
Ross: Oh God, thank you! (Runs and gives all of them a group hug.) Umm, uh, Mr. Stevens Id like you to meet my friends uh, this is Phoebe, Monica, and Chandler.
Chandler: (to the girls who are staring at him) What?
[Scene: A Restaurant, Monica and Chandler are on their date with Janice and Clark, however Clark is a no show and Janice is crying the Mississippi River about it.]
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Ross and Joey are talking to Frank.]
Chandler: Look, Im just gonna be across the hall, we can still do all the same stuff.
Chandler: Look, don't you see what's happening here. Instead of hitting on her right away, he's becoming her confidant. Now he's gonna be the guy she goes too to complain about you.
[Scene: Monica and Phoebe's, Monica is making a sandwich as Chandler enters.]
Chandler: Oh. (takes the cassette and puts it on his arm like the stop smoking patch, and it falls off.) Nope, that patch is no good. (Joey and Monica both do their fake laughs.)
[Scene: Chandler and Eddie's apartment. Chandler is there. There's a knock at the door. He answers it to see a young woman holding a fishtank.]
Chandler: Well I think its safe to say that our friendship is effectively ruined.
[Rachel brings a muffin to Chandler and Monica who are sitting on the couch.]
(Chandler and Joey are loaded down with baby stuff, and Ben)
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, its after Ross and Joeys talk with Frank, and Phoebes is finding out what happened.]
Chandler: Its horrible.
Chandler: All right. I'll tell you what. When we're 40, if neither one of us are married, what do you say you and I get together and have one?
Chandler: Yeah, why don't we lose the gloves.
Phoebe: (to Chandler and Monica) You guys, what, what do we do about Ross who drove all the way up here? What do we do? Just like send him back and were then gonna go skiing?
Chandler: Okay, then get the lobster!
Chandler: Okay, okay, just because he buys you dinner, does not mean you owe him anything.
(He starts to walk to the bathroom and hears the hypnosis tape from Chandlers bedroom.)
[Scene: Chandlers bedroom, hes listening to the hypnosis tape again.]
Chandler: This ice cream tastes like crap by the way.
(Chandler wakes up and stares at the tape.)
PHOEBE: [Standing in living room with Chandler and Joey. She pulls a huge bathing suit out of a box] Hey, Mon, what is this?
Chandler: Yeah, I ended up in the storage room, and not alone.
(She goes into her apartment and sees Chandler, Phoebe, and Ross sitting there.)
Chandler: Wow!! Can Joey and I put them on and fight?
Chandler: (sitting down on the couch) I-kea! This is comfortable.
Chandler: Okay. Okay. (He goes to the closet, moves the clothes out of the way, and notices an empty hanger. He takes the empty hanger and bends it all out of shape. Then he holds it out as if hes giving it to her.) Yes honey, I made it myself. (He throws it down and goes to her chest, grabs something, goes to the bed table, and takes out a pair of scissors. He turns around and holds the scissors to the crotch of the panties he just removed.) I cant do it. I cant do it. (He throws them both down and continues looking. He opens another closet door and finds a tape.) Oh! Oh! A mixed tape! A mixed tape!! (He runs out into the living room.)
Chandler and Joey: Hey!
CHANDLER: I'm afraid I might just be.
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Joey is telling Chandler about Kate.]
Chandler: See uh, thats-thats actually what I wanted to talk to you about. I-I think I know who the other guy is.
Chandler: And may-maybe we could end up on a boat again?
Joey: Well, right after I did that sex study down at NYU. (to Chandler) Hey, Remember that sweater I gave you for your birthday?
[Scene: The Philly, Chandler and Joey are talking to Chloe.]
Chandler: I'm trppd... in an ATM vstbl... wth Jll Gdcr!
Chandler: And youre our age. Youre our age.
Chandler: Thats not a state Joe.
Chandler: Youre our age!
Chandler: Unless Snoopy says it to Charlie Brown, I think we're okay.
[Scene: The Hallway, Chandler and Ross are returning from working out.]
Chandler: Ross! You gotta stop! Okay?! You cant just stare through the peep hole for three hours! Youre gonna get peep eye!
Chandler: Is there any chance you didnt see that?