words in movies
Rachel: What the hell is that?!! (to Monica) What the hell is that? Is that you? (Monica nods her head no, and Rachel realizes what is making that sound.) Ohhhhhhh! (storms over to Chandler and Joeys with Monica in trail.)
(Chandler opens the door, finally.)
Chandler: You!
Chandler: Well the vet seems to think thats shes becoming a rooster. (The rooster crows.) Were getting a second opinion.
Chandler: Oh, I can uh, check that for ya.
Chandler: I can check that for ya.
Monica: I justI cant believe that you think that you and Chandler know me and Rachel better than we know you.
Chandler: Well we-we do. You can only eat Tic Tacks in even numbers.
Chandler: (to Rachel) And you Ross, I believe, if you check Rachels bag you will find a half-eaten box of cookies in there.
Chandler: Okay, ten bucks says that we can name every item in that bag.
Chandler: (to Ross) Stop that now!
Chandler: Yes!
Chandler: Diet soda.
Chandler: Orange juice.
Chandler: Oh-oh, oh, oh-oh! (Whispers something in Joeys ear.)
Chandler: I got it! Scotch tape. (Theyre right.)
Chandler: Well, we used theres up last night making scary faces.
Chandler: All right! Ten buck! Fork it over! Cough it up! Pay the piper! Gimme it.
Chandler: Fears and Pet Peeves.
Ross: According to Chandler, what phenomenon scares the bejeezus out of him?
Joey: (to Chandler) The Irish gig guy?!
Chandler: His legs flail about as if independent of his body!
Joey: (to Chandler) Nana?
Chandler: She has a real name.
Chandler: Althea?! What are you doing?!
Chandler: You're shooting with Althea?!
Chandler: Nice shooting!
Ross: Every week, the TV Guide comes to Chandler and Joeys apartment. What name appears on the address label?
Rachel: Chandler gets it! Its Chandler Bing!
Chandler: Actually, its Miss Chinandolor Bong.
Ross: Ooh. What is the name of Chandlers fathers Las Vegas all-male burlesque?
Chandler: Unfortunately that is correct.
Chandler: I majored in lightning rounds. All right, were gonna destroy you.
Chandler: Well, Im so confused as to what weve been doing so far
Chandler: Say 200?
Monica: We wont. (to Chandler) 300?
Chandler: (interrupting) All right, hold on! If you win, we give up the birds.
Joey: (shocked) Dah!! (Chandler motions for him to calm down.)
Chandler: But if we win, we get your apartment.
Chandler: Okay. (Starts jumping around.)
Ross: You have 30 seconds. And the lightning round beginsstop it (Chandler stops jumping)now. What was Monicas nickname when she was a field hockey goalie?
Chandler: Dangerous Liaisons.
Chandler: Oh! (Whispers something in Joeys ear and then in Rosss ear.)
Chandler: Fancy.
Chandler: Fancy guest.
Ross: Correct. Chandler was how old when he first touched a girls breast?
Chandler: Thanks man.
Ross: Correct! What is Chandler Bings job?
Chandler and Joey: YEAH!!! YES!!!
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, erm, Chandler and Joey's, Chandler and Joey are carrying in the foosball table.]
Chandler: You cant just call Monicas room.
(Chandler grunts and turns around, sees that hes in sight of the room, and mouths damn!)
Monica: Yeah. (to Chandler) I bet you cant guess what color my tonsils are? Ill bet the apartment!
Chandler: Oh, I would never bet this apartment. Its too nice.
Chandler: Hey!
Chandler: Yeah, but I bet it works.
Rachel: (entering from Chandlers bedroom, I guess, and sees the foosball table.) Oh my God! I cant believe you guys are actually think youre moving in here!
Chandler: Well believe it baby!
Chandler: I knew it!
Chandler: Cool, girl roommate.
[Cut too later, the moving process is progressing steadily. Monica is trying to lift a heavy box, as Rachel comes in from Chandlers bedroom.]
(The door opens and Joey and Chandler ride in on the big, fake dog in triumph)
Chandler: Would you all stop yelling in our apartment! You are ruining moving day for us!
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, erm, Monica and Rachel's, Monica and Rachel are busy unpacking.]
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, erm, Chandler and Joey's, theyre both unpacked. The big ceramic dog has found a new home in front of the window. Joey screams and runs into the living room.]
Chandler: What?! What-what is it?!
Chandler: I cant believe we live here!
Chandler and Joey: Awwwww!! (They lean back all the way.) Awwwwwww!!!
Chandler: I gotta check out this hot girl! (He heads to the window but realizes something, stops, turns and points at Monica.) There she is! (He dances over to her and kisses her.)
[Scene: Central Perk, Joey, Chandler, Monica, and Phoebe are there. Joey is holding a deck of cards out to Chandler.]
Chandler: What's going on?
Chandler: (deadpan) Oh, hurry up. I want to sign that.
Chandler: That's why for an entire year people called me Sir Limps-A-Lot?!
Chandler: Uh, HELLO!!
Chandler: (returning) Oh my God! (Storms out.)
Chandler: Who jumps at loud noises!
Chandler: Oh, I just went for a walk, around the living room. Whatever
Chandler: I do not hate Ross!
Chandler: What picture?
Chandler: You dove in front of Ross! Ross!
Chandler: Much sense?!
Joey: I know it sounds crazy, but Chandler this is (Goes and picks up the sandwich) the greatest sandwich in the world!
Chandler: Really?!
Chandler: I thought you were showing me how much you mean to me.
Chandler: So you didn't uh, choose Ross before me.
Chandler: (examining the hat) And the bunny got away. (Turns and starts looking for the bunny as Joey puts the hat on.)
Chandler: Thanks. (He grabs the sandwich.)
Phoebe: (To Chandler) Check it out! Cup hat! (Points to her hat.) Cup banner! Cup chandelier! And the thing that started it all, the cup! (Holds up one.)
(They all turn and look away. Suddenly a loud bang sounds out and in slow motion Joey slowly throws his body over Ross. Gary is shocked at what he sees while Chandler is obviously hurt.)
(Chandler takes a bite.)
Chandler: Well, I was kinda hoping we could do this without him. (She starts to take off her latex gloves.) Oh no-no-no, leave the gloves on.
Joey: Yeah! In fact, to prove how much you mean to me, (He unwraps the sandwich and holds it out for Chandler) here.
Chandler: You dont want to be guys, youd be all hairy and wouldnt live as long. (Starts to go to his bedroom)
Chandler: Hiya doin' pumpkin?
Chandler: Okay.
(Monica leaves and Chandler moves to talk to Phoebe.)
Phoebe: Nope. (Chandler nods in agreement.)
[Scene: Central Perk, Gary, Phoebe, Monica, and Chandler are there.]
Chandler: (terrified) Right, because it's fast. Because, it's so fast. It's fast!
Chandler: So, what are you gonna do?
Chandler: I'll try, but I'm not sure what good it would do, y'know? Because I'm a lot less afraid of commitment than I used to be.
Chandler: Me?! Why me?
Chandler: (starts to laugh, but then gets serious) So umm, you-you flirt with guys all the time?
Chandler: (pouting) It was a car backfire!
[Scene: the 5th Precinct, Gary's precinct, Chandler has come to talk to him about commitment. And as he's walking through the door he notices a couple of "Ladies of the night" sitting there. (If you know what I mean.)]
Chandler: Gary, I'm here to report a crime.
Gary: Hey Chandler, what are you doing here?
Chandler: Hey ladies! What are you in here for? (Laughs at his joke.)
Chandler: You mean scared.
Chandler: Well, is there any chance you were looking into a bright, shiny thing called a mirror?
Chandler: Scared? Happy?
Gary: Chandler, what-what are you doing?
Chandler: Yeah, I think I do! Y'know what? You move in with her! You move in with her right now! Maybe I should in with Monica!
Chandler: (pause) Yeah, you're right about that.
Chandler: Were you're parents happy, or something?
Chandler: Wow, y'know when you say it, it doesn't sound so scary.
Chandler: I am trying to open your eyes, my man! Don't you see, if you lived with Phoebe she's always gonna be there. You're gonna get home, she's there. You go to bed, she's there. You wake up and oh yes, she's there!
Chandler: (entering, happily, with a bottle of champagne, thinking that Monica is the only one there) Ha-ha-ha-(sees everyone)-enh-enh. I'm so glad you guys are all here! My office finally got wrinkle free fax paper!
Chandler: Yes I did, and I think you should do it.
Chandler: Im sorry. (Pause) If you ask me, I'd move in with him.
Chandler: Hi!
Gary: Hey Chandler.
Chandler: He's a great guy, y'know? And he loves you a lot, you are a very lucky lady.
Phoebe: Ohh!! God! (Gary enters and she sees him) Ooh! (To Chandler) Get out of here, good for nothing.
Chandler: What?
Chandler: Four hours? You guys have been doing this for four hours?
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Chandler, Joey, Phoebe, and Monica are watching Three's Company.]
Chandler: Hi.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Monica is in the kitchen as Chandler enters.]
Monica: Chandler! Everyone--no one's eating my Tuscan finger food 'cause they're all filling up on Phoebe's snow cones!
(As she walks away, Chandler mouths a scream to Monica. How motions and mouths, "It's okay, it's okay.")
Chandler: Not fun anymore?
Chandler: Oh that is over!
Chandler: You guys wanna eat here?
Chandler: Yeah, you almost overreacted to something.
Rachel: No, I meant with the dropper over here. (Points at Chandler.)
Chandler: Well, I heard that you thinking about asking Phoebe to move in with you and I thought maybe, we should have a talk. Man to uh, me.
Chandler: Really?
Chandler: Okay, so Richard, Richard!
Chandler: Ohh.
Chandler: Oh, Richard. That's all I ever hear, Richard, Richard, Richard!
Chandler: What?
Rachel: Chandler!
Chandler: You okay there man?
Chandler: How much did I love The King and I? (Oh, you get the point by now.)
Chandler: Uh, no Pheebs. What's it look like?
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Ross, Chandler, Monica, and Phoebe are eating breakfast.]
Chandler: Yeah, I know that means buddy!
Chandler: Well, uh, we can talk about that too Pheebs.
Chandler: Thank you.
Chandler: Thats a great idea! We can easily think of a way for us both to enjoy the room.
Chandler: All right, great, road trip baby! (To Monica) This okay with you?
Chandler: We dont have to come up with this now.
Chandler: Hey, yknow what? Why dont we think about changes we can make in the living room?
Chandler: Yes, the doctors say if they remove it, he'll die.
Chandler: It's throwing and catching!
Chandler: All right, let me in. (He jumps off of the counter to join in the game.)
Chandler: (entering) Hey!
Chandler: What?
Chandler: So you don't get paid unless the movie makes money?
Chandler: Yeah, I mean were gonna have to move around some furniture to make room for my chair. (Kisses her and heads into the living room.)
Chandler: Okay!
Monica: Chandler! You don't have to ask for my permission. (Quietly) You can go.
(Joey nods to Chandler, no way!)
Chandler: Come on! Gary's such a great guy! Whatever the problem is, you can work it out!
Chandler: Oh, he's in the back. The duck pissed him off, said that eggs came first.
Chandler: All right, bye-bye now!
Chandler: Yeah.