words in movies
Chandler: I like her.
Phoebe: (to Chandler) Why? Because she can sing and play guitar and do both at the same time?
Chandler: Well, thats pretty much all Im looking for from these people.
Chandler: (to Ross) All right listen, I have to go to the bathroom, but if the place with the big fish comes up again. Id like know whether thats several big fish or just one big fish.
[Scene: Outside the bathroom, Chandler is pacing back and fourth, waiting is use it.]
Gunther: (to Chandler) Someone in there?
Chandler: No. This is just part of a dare devil game that I play called wait until the last moment before I burst and die.
Chandler: Jeez, man did you fall..(sees its a beautiful woman coming out of the mens room) Hi! So ah, did ya, did-did-did ya fall high?
Chandler: (to Gunther) Y'know what Gunther, go ah, go ahead, Im-Im talking to ah, (tries to get her to say her name). (to her) This is the part where you say your name.
Chandler: Ginger. Im talking to Ginger, so....
Chandler: Nope, nope, Id just ah, Id rather talk to you. (pause) Yes, I do. Yes, I do have to go to the bathroom. (knocks on the door)
Phoebe: Wheres Chandler?
Joey: Is ah, is Chandler around?
Monica: Y'know what, dont tell us. Well just wait until Chandler gets home, (to Phoebe) because itll be more fun that way.
[Scene: A street, Chandler is kissing Ginger.]
Chandler: Well, thats the best kiss Ive had with anyone Ive ever met in a mens room.
Chandler: (sees her foot is in a slush puddle) Op, foot in a puddle, foot all in a puddle.
Chandler: Yeah, were gonna have to get you out of those shoes.
Chandler: No, really youre gonna freeze.
Chandler: Youre not, what do you, what do you got a bionic foot?
Rachel: Okay, well if I stop playing with Joey and Chandler, can I play with Mark?
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Chandler is reading the newspaper.]
Chandler: Hey.
Chandler: Oh, I hate that. I once had a thing of half and half, stole my car.
Chandler: Great. It was great. Shes ah, shes great, great looking, great personality, shes greatness.
Chandler: Joey told you about the leg, huh?
Chandler: Oh God, it freaked me out. Okay, I know it shouldnt have, but it did. I mean I like her, I dont want to stop seeing her, but every so often its like Hey, y'know what, wheres your leg? I mean Im the smallest person in the world arent I? Im the smallest person in the world.
Chandler: (to Monica) Actually hes the smallest person in the world.
Joey: (to Chandler) Heard about the leg burnin huh?
Chandler: It came up.
(Both Chandler and Monica walk away in disgust.)
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Chandler and Ginger are eating dinner.]
Chandler: No. No. Actually I forgot, what is the deal with that again?
Chandler: No. No. I dont think so.
Chandler: Thats-thats my nubbin.
Chandler: Its kinda a ah, a third nipple kinda thing.
Chandler: Well, y'know two regulars. And ah one that barely qualifies as... (starts to kiss her again, but she gets up.) Ahh, what?
Chandler: You ah, you have, you have to leave, now? How come?
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, the whole gang except Chandler is there.]
Chandler: (entering, happily) Well hello!
Chandler: The doctor.
Chandler: Oh yes! Just had me a little nubbin-ectomy. Yep! Two nipples, no waiting.
Chandler: That was an obvious joke, and I didnt think of it. Why didnt I think of it? The source of all my powers. Oh dear God, what have I done!
Joey: (shocked) Dah!! (Chandler motions for him to calm down.)
[Flashback, year 1987. Chandler enters the school's corridor. Ross is hanging some flyers on the wall. Both have a funny 80s hair and clothes.]
Missy: Well, Chandler and I used to make out! A lot!
Ross: Oh, well, uh, this is gonna sound kinda silly, but, do you remember my roommate Chandler Bing?
[Scene: Central Perk, Phoebe is coaching Chandler on how to break up with Janice.]
Chandler: Ross, that was 16 years ago!
(Chandler looks at the other two guys, embarrassed)
Chandler: Oh really?
Chandler: Oh really!?
Chandler: I believe the foundation of our friendship was unfortunate hair. (Ross just stares at him) All right, look, if we're really gonna do this... it's not like you never broke one of the pacts.
Chandler: Oh please, and you knew how much I liked her.
Chandler and Ross: Hey! Hey Adrienne. (They move away from her)
Chandler: (to the two guys) Excuse me. (Chandler and Ross move away from them). That didn't make us sound gay at all!
Chandler: Really?
Rachel: I know. But if some guy who looks like Corey Haim wants to kiss me tonight, I'm sooo gonna let them! (They spot Chandler)
Chandler: Aren't you...?
Monica: Look, there's Chandler. You knew, that stupid friend of Ross'. Said I'm fat. You know I've already lost 4 pounds!
Chandler: Hi Monica.
Chandler: (smiling at Monica) Right. (to Rachel) So how're you doing?
(Cut to Chandler. He's walking around looking for Ross. He sees him kissing a girl next to a vending machine)
Chandler: O-kay. I'll see if I can find Ross. (Goes off to find Ross.)
Ross: Cool! (They start kissing again and Chandler looks shocked)
[Scene: We cut back to the present. The reunion where Chandler and Ross are talking.]
Chandler: Not her!
Chandler: Soo... you girls having fun?
Chandler: Nude... (Ross looks at him)... pictures of Anna Kournikova. I'm so sorry.
Chandler: So where are you applying to?
Chandler: Well maybe if you go to school here next year we can totally hang out.
Ross: Yeah, the phone was facing the other way. (Chandler fixes it and a picture frame off the table.) And that goes back up there.
Chandler: All right, I'd say we make a pact. Neither of us will go out with Missy Goldberg.
Rachel: Oh well, You know, I think it's kinda really important that I go somewhere where there's sun, so I'm sort of... (Chandler leans in an kisses her) (She pulls away) Hey!
Chandler: Yeah, I don't know why we hang out with married couples more often.
Chandler: (sighs) Just one more thing. I was so pissed at you that night that I wanted to get back at you. So I thought, who does Ross like the more than anybody?
Ross: Did you know Chandler kissed Rachel?
Chandler: Why?
Chandler: Well, maybe you can get in on a beauty scholarship.
Joey: Girls Chandler could never get?
[Scene: Chandler and Monica's apartment. Monica's there and Ross and Chandler walk in.]
Chandler: You kissed her that night too?
Chandler: Seriously, where did this happen?
Chandler: Is it me, or have the greetings gone downhill around here?
Chandler: Yeah, but it was like a million years ago, so it doesn't matter.
Chandler: I'm pretty sure I put her on my bed.
Chandler: Oh wait... What bed did you say she was on?
Monica: YES! (Chandler gets an "oh no!" look on his face)
Chandler: Why would I kiss a girl, and then put her on your bed?
Chandler: What did I marry into?
Chandler: Maybe we finish this for him! (he sits down on the sofa and he start typing on Ross' computer) "Also I cloned a dinosaur in my lab. She's now my girlfriend. I don't care what society says. It's the best sex I've ever had"... aaand SEND!
Chandler: Wish I could switch with someone. I really don't wanna sit with Allen Iverson over there.
Chandler: No stupid jokes. I thought that was for the actual wedding.
Chandler: Hey!
(cut to Ross, Chandler and Rachel)
Chandler: (to Rachel) You know what I just realized? We have no idea what we're doing in the wedding tomorrow.
Chandler: Heh.
Chandler: Thank you.
Ross: What? (Ross and Chandler don't know what to say, so there's an embarrassing long pause)
Chandler: What happened?
[Scene: Class of '91 reunion. Ross is walking angrily towards Chandler, who is talking to two other guys.]
(Ross spots Chandler and starts chasing him around the kitchen table. Chandler runs and hides behind Monica.)
Chandler: I know, I hate being left out of things.
Chandler: Fine. We're just sitting here. Alone. Doing nothing. It's our rehearsal for tomorrow.
Chandler: Pick me, I look great in a tux and I will not steal focus.
Chandler: Oh, I will. But I will need a mirror... as he is me!
Ross: (to Chandler) Well, if Phoebe's choosing, then say hello to Mike's next groomsman.
(Cut to Chandler and Ross. Phoebe comes out of the ladies room and they run toward her.)
Chandler: (almost crying) I wouldn't know, I didn't make it! (they hug)
Chandler: Mike didn't tell you? You have to chose one of us to be in your wedding. One of his groomsmen fell out.
Chandler: No, Im not mocking you, (in a mocking voice) or you beautiful guest room. (Exits.)
Mike: Is that what you say to Chandler?
Chandler: Did I? Let's refresh. I believe what I said was that I could see your scalp.
Chandler: (Picks up the "Miss Congeniality" DVD) She's an FBI agent, posing as a beauty contestant.
Phoebe: YOU'RE FIRED! (mimes the CUT again) (pause and she raises her glass) Cheers! (Chandler raises his, smiling and Monica stares at him and he puts down his glass.)
Rachel: Well, Chandler said that it's really important to him too!
Chandler: By the way, that fight was totally arousing.
Ross: Listen, listen. Whoever you pick is gonna walk down the aisle with you! Now, I promise I won't say a word, but if you pick Chandler he's gonna be whispering stupid jokes in your ear the whole time!
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's apartment. Chandler is pacing and Rachel walks in.]
Chandler: (To Monica) Wow! Listen, we had a good run. You know, what was it? Four? Five months? I mean, that's more than most people have in a lifetime! So, good-bye, take care, bye-bye then! (He kisses her and starts to climb out the balcony window)
Chandler: How's it going?
Chandler: You too.
Chandler: You told us both we could be in the wedding? (they both stare at Rachel)
Chandler: I'm not supposed to tell you.
Chandler: (smiling to himself too) That's what I was doing too.
Chandler: Me too.
Chandler: Rach, Rach, knock knock.
(They walk passed each other, Ross towards the door, Chandler towards the counter, suddenly they turn around to face each other)
Chandler: I'll tell you at the wedding.
(Ross and Chandler look shocked)
Chandler: Well, it's just with uhm, work and the stress of adoption, we just don't feel like we have the energy. Plus, we don't think it's fair that every year the burden falls on us.
(Chandler lets her into the apartment and reveals that Monica is getting a massage from another woman.)
Chandler and Ross: I'll do it!
Chandler: So technically, would this person be in the wedding?
Ross: No, but Chandler, hello... Aren't you scared of dogs?
Chandler: I'm not scared. (moves towards Mike and Chappy) I'll just take little Chappy and... (he backs out) HE CAN SENSE MY FEAR. MY THROAT IS EXPOSED.
Chandler: (quickly) I'll do it.
Phoebe: Oh, okay. Hi new dad. (Chandler waves)
Monica: Okay, Mike and Joey, get in position. Chandler, come with me. (they walk off, Ross looks down to Chappy, who he's holding and he gets a whiff of the dog's smell. He is clearly disgusted by it.)
Chandler: Oh yeah! (Monica walks outside)
Chandler: (to Monica) Is it okay that I want you to wear that head set in bed tonight?
(Cut to inside Central Perk where Rachel is helping Phoebe. Chandler and Monica enter.)
[Scene: Chandler and Joeys Bathroom: Chandler is watching the duck swim in the bathtub.]