words in movies
[Scene: Central Perk, Joey and Chandler are there as Phoebe enters carrying a drum.]
Chandler: Hey! Wow, it is true what they say, pregnant bellies look like a drum.
Chandler: All right.
Chandler: Wouldnt that be Frank the III?
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's erm, Chandler and Joey's, Joey and Chandler are playing foosball as Phoebe enters.]
Chandler: Hey! Do we have a baby name yet?
Chandler: Well, it certainly worked for that Valdez kid.
Chandler: Hey, yknow what, if youre gonna do that, if youre gonna name him Joey, you should name him Chandler. (Phoebe doesnt think so.) Oh, come on! Chandlers funny, sophisticated, and hes very loveable, once you get to know him.
Chandler: Well, Chandler will be there for you too. I mean, well, he might be a little late, but-but, hell be there. And hell bring you some cold soda, if want you need him for is that youre really hot.
Phoebe: Well, I, I like the idea of naming him after someone I love, and Joey and Chandler are great names. (They both stare at her.) But, all right, I dontmaybe Ill just name him The Hulk.
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's erm, Monica and Rachel's, Monica is cooking and Rachel is getting ready for a date with Joshua.]
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's erm, Chandler and Joey's, Joey, Chandler, and Phoebe are there as Ross enters.]
Chandler: Hey!
Chandler: And now youre giving me the message!
Chandler: You actually think that something can happen between Emily and Susan?
Chandler: Hi! Hi! Youre crazy! Okay? This is Emily. Emily is straight.
Phoebe: So, I decided Im definitely going to go with either Joey or Chandler.
Joey: Oh! Oh-oh, you gotta pick Joey! I mean, name one famous person named Chandler.
Chandler: Raymond Chandler.
Chandler: Okay, there are no famous Joeys. Except for, huh, Joey Buttafucco.
Chandler: Okay, look, Joey! Come on, think about it, first of all, hell never be President. Theres never gonna be a President Joey.
Joey: All right look man, I didnt want to bring this up, but Chandler, is the stupidest name I ever heard in my life! Its not even a name; its barely even a word. Okay? Its kinda like chandelier, but its not! All right? Its a stupid, stupid non-name!
Chandler: Wow, youre, youre right. I have a horrible, horrible name.
Chandler: Okay.
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's erm, Monica and Rachel's, Rachel is on her dinner date with Joshua.]
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's erm, Chandler and Joey's, Chandler is looking for a new name in Phoebes book of names.]
Chandler: No, no, youre right, it is a ridiculous name!
Chandler: Yes it is! From now on, I have no first name.
Chandler: I have no name.
Chandler: Okay uh, for now, temporarily, you can call me, Clint.
Chandler: Okay, so what name am I cool enough to pull off?
Chandler: Its Clint. Its Clint! (He heads for his bedroom.)
Chandler: Its Clint! Clint!
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's erm, Chandler and Joey's, Phoebe is showing off more of her drum skills to Joey by rubbing one of the sticks back and forth across the drum.]
Chandler: (entering) Okay. Okay. All right. Help! Am I a Mark, or a John?
Chandler: All right look, am I serious, okay? Tomorrow at 3:30 I am going down to the courthouse.
Chandler: Hey, look, this name has been holding me back my entire life. Okay, its probably why kids picked on me in school, and why I never do well with women So, as of 4 oclock tomorrow, Im either gonna be Mark Johnson or John Markson.
Phoebe: You got problems because of you! Not your name! All right, this has got to stop! Chandler is a great name! In factyes, (To Joey) Im, Im sorry. I know you really wanted me to name the baby Joey, but eh, so, Im-Im, Im gonna, Im gonna name the baby Chandler.
Chandler: (pleased) Really?!
Chandler: Okay. Thanks.
Chandler: You wanna hug it out?
Chandler: Yay!
Chandler: Okay!
Chandler: Bye, Pheebs!
(She exits, and after the door is closed, Chandler turns to Joey and )
Chandler: Ha! Ha! Ha!
Joey: Ohh! (Realises it was all a trick to get Phoebe to name the baby Chandler.)
Chandler: (stopping him) Hey, whoa-whoa! What's she like?
[Scene: Central Perk, Monica, Rachel, Chandler and Joey are there looking at pictures from the trip to London.]
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Joey is returning and finds Chandler, Monica, and Rachel are there.]
Chandler: Ooh, I do! I do! I do!
[Scene: Central Perk, Monica, Phoebe, Joey, and Chandler are recovering from Ross's rebuke.]
Chandler and Joey: Nice!
Phoebe: (entering, hurridly) Hey, you guys! Look what I found! Look at this! (She hands Chandler a picture) Thats my Moms writing! Look.
Phoebe: Umm Wow, all right. (Checks the book.) Wow! Yay! Ooh, Im gonna meet a guy! And really soon! And hes gonna be the man of my dreams. Probably not the guy I had a dream about last night. (Points at Chandler.)
Chandler: Ooh! Israeli champagne. And it's vanilla!
Chandler: (To Rachel) He has a gun!
CHANDLER: Yeah, and someday when you're ready, you'll make it past the hedges.
Joey: (sheepishly) I finished my book. (Chandler and Monica slowly retreat back to bed.)
Phoebe: Let's just say, I'm glad I'm not Chandler.
Chandler: I would have to say that is an 'L'-shaped bracket.
Chandler: That's kind of a masculine name, don't you think?
Rachel: (to Chandler) O-o-o-okay, how did it go? Tell me everything.
Phoebe: So-so how long did that last for you and Chandler?
Chandler: So what happened?
Chandler: Oh hey, how'd the interview go?
Chandler: No. No. Actually I forgot, what is the deal with that again?
Chandler: No, the best reason to get married is pregnancy. Sorry is pretty much fourth y'know, behind being ready and actually wanting to get married. (Laughs.) Will you be my wife?
Rachel: Thanks Chandler.
Chandler: Our adoption social worker is coming by today so we are cleaning the apartment.
Chandler: Well you coulda tried, not kissing him.
Chandler: Come on, Rach.
Joey: Yeah! (Chandler makes a noise) No?
Chandler: Very, very funny, but don't say things like that in front of Monica. I don't want you putting any ideas in her head.
Chandler: (To Gary) So what do you say, maybe sometime I hold your gun?
Monica: Oh umm, that's because I just wanted to y'know walk in on me and Chandler while we were, y'know, doing it all night. Will you excuse me for just a second?
Chandler: Why?
Chandler: Ohh, so?
Chandler: Uh, yeah.
Monica: Okay. (She gets up and walks over to Chandler.) Chandler? Can I see you for a second?
Chandler: I tell people secrets. It makes them like me.
Chandler: Oh, y'know what? The last time Joey went to a meadow, his mother was shot by a hunter.
Ross: Smooth man. Yeah, you got some chilie on your neck. (Chandler checks and runs into the bathroom.) Well, I just want to say, thanks everyone, this-this was great. And hey! See you guys Monday morning. (They museum geeks wave at him.) Thanks Joey.
Chandler: No, you're the best.
Chandler: That was amazing.
Chandler: That was amazing!
Chandler: No, you're the best.
Chandler: Well, my Grandfather was Swedish and my Grandmother was actually a tiny little bunny.
Phoebe: Ok, so this is pretty much what's happened so far. Ross was in love with Rachel since, you know, forever, but every time he tried to tell her, something kind of got in the way, like cats, and Italian guys. Finally Chandler was like "forget about her" but when Ross was in China on his dig, Chandler let it slip that Ross was in love with Rachel. She was like, "Oh my god." So she went to the airport to meet him when he came back, but what she didn't know was, that Ross was getting off the plane with another woman. Uh-Oh! So, that's pretty much everything you need to know. But, enough about us. So, how've you been?
Chandler: Oh! Good for you Pheebs, way to go! (Breathes a sigh of relief)
Phoebe: You tired Chandler?
Gary: So uh Chandler, you like that badge I got you?
Monica: I'm sorry, okay. It's just that Chandler has somebody, and Phoebe has somebody- I thought I'd ask Fun Bobby.
Chandler: Monica! This is the Men's room! (Pause) Isn't it?
Monica: Hi Chandler.
Phoebe: (to Chandler) Hey! (Chandler looks up, startled) Why isnt it Spiderman? Yknow like Goldman, Silverman...
Chandler: Yeah that was great. That was really great! But to tell you the truth, I'm more excited about where we are right now.
Chandler: (gasps) So?
Chandler: Oh wow! Is that what this all have been about?
Chandler: Yeah?
Chandler: (entering) You guys ready fore the movies?
Chandler: Yes you did! Admit it! You freaked out!
Chandler: No. And if I did, I don't think we'd be going out. Monica, this is getting ridiculous!
Chandler: Okay. (He picks the 9 of Spades)
Chandler: Oh yes.
Chandler: (pause) Yes.
Chandler: Hi there!
Chandler: What a great apology! (To Monica) And you accept! Okay, bye-bye!
Chandler: That.
(Joey laughs then realizes the trick didn't work when Chandler hands him his card back.)
Chandler: Okay, but don't you think this is a little extreme?
Chandler: Dude! That's my girlfriend!
(As they walk out he motions to Chandler that he is still Ben's godfather.)
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Chandler comes running in. Everyone else is already there.]
(Phoebe knocks on the door with the wine and Chandler answers it. Rachel hides next to the door.)
Chandler: Yeah, it is the best.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Rachel is telling Chandler and Monica about her day.]
Chandler: Yeah, I wanna go to babe.
Chandler: Y'know what I just realized? You just freaked out about our relationship.
Chandler: Yeah, or you can do the easy thing and smoke.
Chandler: Top of the world? Dock of the bay? (He tries to think of another but can't) I'm out.
Chandler: Oh, hey! (Ross nods in agreement as well.)
(As they turn the couch, Chandler gets sandwiched between the railing and the couch.)
Chandler: No-no-no-no, the games not over, were just switching teams.
Chandler: Honey, the tortilla chips know what you mean.
Ross and Chandler: Hi!
Chandler: Ah sure. What's in 'em?
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Ross and Chandler are talking.]
Joey: What? Chandler! Tell 'em!
Chandler: (shocked) Well I mean, let me get the door first. (Goes and opens the door.) Oh, hi! No one. (Exits.)
Chandler: Yeah or also when you don't have somebody breathing down your neck ALL THE LIVE LONG DAY!!
[Scene: Central Perk, Chandler and Monica are there as Rachel enters.]
Chandler: Yes you did! You look happy and sick; you smoked!
Chandler: I wish I had smoked for my career
Chandler: I think you smell great! (He sniffs her shoulder.)
Chandler: (wincing) Yes, he is!
Chandler: That's not what I had in mind! See, people like Ross don't generally wear these types of pants. You see, they're very tight. (Motions to Ross's buttock.) Maybe there's something in that area.
Chandler: Great job with the cups, Pheebs!
(Chandler starts to follow her into the kitchen.)
(Everyone stops and looks at Chandler, who's nodding.)
Chandler: Thank you! Thank you! (Runs to the snow cone machine.)
Chandler: (to Kim and Nancy) Oh, hi! Excuse me, is uh Rachel Green here? I was supposed to meet her for lunch.
Chandler: Okay, great.
Chandler: Look what do I do? I wanna get past this, I don't wanna be afraid of the commitment thing. I wanna go through the tunnel, to the other side!
Chandler: I'll catch you guys later. (Exits.)
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Chandler is getting ready for a date with Monica as Ross enters.]
Chandler: Hey!