words in movies
[Scene: Central Perk, Rachel, Chandler, Monica, and Joey are there as Phoebe enters.]
Chandler: Hey!
Chandler: Ill give up my ticket.
Chandler: And I think Ross is generous too.
Joey: Oh man! (Hits Chandler)
Chandler: Hey!
Joey: Hey Ross listen Chandler got you out of going to the lesbian sandwich museum this weekend!
Chandler: Ross.
Phoebe: Yeah, but theres a two-year wait. And then what if you get engaged in two years and then you got to wait another two years for this place. Thats four years. Chandlers not gonna wait that long. Hes gonna find somebody else, yknow? Someone, someone who did put their name on the list. (Rachel agrees.)
[Scene: Monica, Chandler, and Phoebe's, Chandler is reading the newspaper as the phone rings. He lets the machine answer it.]
Chandler: (on machine) Youve reached Monica and Chandlers, if youre listening to this message, were probably screening. (to himself) Yeah we are.
The Museum Official: (on phone) Hi, this is Heldi from the Morgan Chase museum. Im calling for Monica Geller. I want to let her know that there was a cancellation and if shes still interested in having the Bing-Geller wedding at our facility, it is available (Chandler runs to answer the phone.)
Chandler: (on phone) This is Chandler Bing! This is Chandler Bing! (Listens) Yes, the groomNo! Not the groom!!
[Scene: Monica, Chandler, and Phoebe's, Chandler is sitting at the kitchen table staring at the phone as Monica enters.]
Chandler: (gets up) See you later. (Starts to leave.)
Chandler: (angrily) Well next time ask! Or at least wait for me to ask! (He storms out.)
Chandler: (on machine) This is Chandler Bing! This is Chandler Bing! (The machine beeps off.)
Monica: Have you seen Chandler?!
Monica: The woman from the museum called and said that there was a cancellation and that we could move up our wedding and Chandler heard! (Phoebe gasps.) I know! How bad is this?!
Phoebe: Well for the regular guy, its bad, but Chandler, Oh dear God!
[Scene: Monica, Chandler, and Phoebe's, Monica is pacing, waiting for Chandler to return. Chandler enters.]
Chandler: Im not freaking out. Why would I be freaking out? A woman named Heldi called and said we were getting married, but that happens everyday. (Does one of those Chandler noises.)
Chandler: Right here! (Clucks like a chicken for some reason.)
Monica: Chandler, please dont think I was trying to pressure you. Phoebe and Rachel
Chandler: Phoebe and Rachel! So the people that knew about our wedding before me were you, Phoebe and Rachel, Heldi, and apparently some band called Starlight Magic 7 who are available by the way!
Chandler: Okay.
Chandler: Yes, if it really doesnt mean anything, because you know that Im just not ready
Chandler: Okay. (They hug.)
Chandler: Totally.
Chandler: Yeah, its beautiful.
Chandler: I know.
Chandler: Okay. Okay. (Joey puts him down.) What are you gonna do to me if you get the part?
Chandler: (To Joey) So, you busy Thursday?
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, night. Chandler and Joey are sharing the sofabed in the living room. Joey is restless.]
Chandler: Really?
Chandler: No! No! No! I was so careful! (Runs out.)
Phoebe: Okay. Oh umm, Chandler, Monica is looking for you.
Chandler: But kids are so intuitive. Don't you think on some level he already knows?
Chandler: Hey!
Chandler: So?!
Chandler: Its Thursday! How was the audition?!
[Scene: Joey's apartment, Joey is eating pizza as Chandler enters.]
Chandler: (initially worried, but gets over it) Really?
[Scene: Central Perk, Joey, Chandler, Monica, and Phoebe are there as Rachel enters.]
Joey: Oh, Im sorry. Thank you Chandler.
Chandler: (laughs) Isnt she cute? (On Monicas death stare) No!
[Scene: Later that evening at the rehearsal dinner. Chandler and Monica are sitting on a sofa. Chandler is covering his face in embarrassment because of the toast.]
Chandler: Oh, tell her good luck with that.
Chandler: So, why is she leaving? Is it a school night and she has a lot of homework to do?
Chandler: Okay, are you aware unagi (does the finger thing) is an eel?
Chandler: Oh thats so funny because we found someone too.
Monica: Chandler, do you think we talk about our relationship enough?
Chandler: (To Monica) All yours babe. (Walks away.)
[Scene: Monica, Chandler, and Phoebe's, Chandler is sitting at the table and Monica is doing something in the kitchen.]
Chandler: Why would our guy be a weirdo?
Monica: Well, uh yknow, our guy works with Chandler and hes really nice and smart and hes a great dresser!
Chandler: A face ass?
Phoebe: Oh, Chandler funny?
Chandler: Our guy smells incredible.
Chandler: Hey.
Chandler: Uh-huh.
Monica: (To Chandler) Do you want our guy to be your guy?
Chandler: Thats still in there?!
Chandler: Well, you dont look good Joe.
Chandler: Our guy has great hair.
Chandler: Our new fridge? I dont live here anymore.
Chandler: (not quite sure where Joeys going and is a little worried) Okay
Chandler: Yeah, can I get a 3-piece, some cole slaw, some beans, and a Coke-(Yelps in
Chandler: What about all that friends forever stuff?
Chandler: Just tell her the truth! Tell her youre not ready.
Chandler: No, no, I keep trying, yknow? I can get out, "Joey, I have too " but then I lose my nerve and I always finish with, " go to the bathroom." He may think Im sick.
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's apartment, Ross, Chandler, and Joey are entering.]
Chandler: Joey, I saw you push him!
Chandler: Uh-huh.
Joey: All right. Chandler, do you remember how I told you about our fridge?
Chandler: Hey!
Chandler: Yeah.
Chandler: I was shrieking... like a Marine.
Monica: Yes! We found you a really cute and funny guy from Chandlers work!
Chandler: Yeah, but Sebastian? What is that? A cats name?
Chandler: Are you funny?
Chandler: Are you sure?! Because our guy smells incredible!
Chandler: (To Monica) Turns out he is kinda funny.
Chandler: Okay, so you will meet our guys?
Chandler: Okay now it doesnt matter which one you choose, yknow? Its completely up to you. Our guy is perfect, or you can go out with the guy Phoebe deemed not good enough to go out with herself.
[Scene: Central Perk, Monica, Chandler, Phoebe, and Joey are there. Monica is holding a piece of paper.]
Janice: I love the way you look every night Chandler! (Monica breaks the kiss and Chandler freezes in terror.) Thats why I made you this tape! Happy Birthday! Love Janice!
Chandler: (To Ross) Well, there you are! So what did Elizabeth say?
Chandler: Well, maybe you dont marry this one.
Ross: All right. (He gently tosses the ball to Chandler who catches it.)
Chandler: Eldad, sit down. (To Rachel) Move over! Move over now!
Chandler: Hey!
[Scene: Central Perk, Rachel is reading as Monica and Chandler enter.]
Chandler: So did Monica tell you about this great band called the Swing Kings that were trying to get to play at the wedding?
Chandler: Its a sock bunny.
Chandler: Joey! Joey! Joey! J-J-Joey-Joey-J-Joey! (Monica hides under the covers as Joey enters. Remember?)
Chandler: There you go! There you are! (Rachel stares at Monica and Chandler)
Chandler: You know the hotels?
All: (Chandler stops her) No-no-no-no! Have a seat! Have a seat!
Chandler: (panicked) ahem... um... Crystal duck.
Chandler: So what was it for anyway?
[Scene: Monica, Chandler, and Phoebe's, Rachel, Chandler, and Phoebe are there.]
Chandler: Yeah.
Chandler: Good-good-good-good.
Chandler: Gap commercial. (To Monica) So did you book them? Did you call?
Monica: Chandler.
Chandler: (To Joey) So uh, whats this thing youre auditioning for?
Chandler: That is lucky.
Chandler: (To Phoebe) Y'know what? I have been trying to apologize to him all week! If he's not gonna let me do it on the phone, I'm gonna go down there and do it in person.
Chandler: Now-now, why would you say that Joseph?
Chandler: Oh, ok.
[Scene: Monica and Chandlers bedroom, they are both getting undressed.]
Chandler: Do you want me to call?
Chandler: Hey! Howd the audition go?
Chandler: Oh my God!
Chandler: Oh thats great!
Chandler: Oh, are we playing this?!
Chandler: So it did go well.
Chandler: Well, it is overdue.
Chandler: Oh-oh, what are you doing?
Chandler: Staying out of the way.
Chandler: Wait a minute, is she going for spring vacation or is she going for spring break? (Does a little whooping/party noise.)
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's erm, Monica and Rachel's, Monica, Joey, and Chandler are sitting and talking as Phoebe and Rachel enter.]
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's apartment, Chandler is there talking to the chick and duck.]
Chandler: (on phone) Yes, Fran. I know what time it is, but I'm looking at the WENUS and I'm not happy!
Chandler: Yeah okay, I was just talking to the guys. Just look at them I mean, is it okay if they come visit?
Chandler: (looks down at his clothes) Am I naked again?!
Chandler: As crazy as soccer?
Chandler: You mean you didnt get it from this?
Joey: How could you do this to me Chandler?! This part couldve turned my whole career around!
Chandler: I messed up. Okay? Im sorry, I really messed up.