words in movies
Chandler: We can? All right, I'm tryin' that.
Chandler: So, Saturday night, the big night, date night, Saturday night, Sat-ur-day night!
Chandler: Not a one.
Chandler: Oh, right, right, shut up.
Monica: Chandler, nobody likes breaking up with someone. You just gotta do it.
Chandler: No, I know, but it's just so hard, you know? I mean, you're sitting there with her, she has no idea what's happening, and then you finally get up the courage to do it, and there's the horrible awkward moment when you've handed her the note.
Chandler: Oh, thanks, but I think she'd feel like we're gangin' up on her.
Chandler: Ooh, I hate when my father calls me that.
[Scene: Ross' apartment, Chandler is over.]
Chandler: Oh. Well, hold on camper, are you sure you've thought this thing through?
Chandler: It's just you and Rachel, just the two of you? This is a date. You're going on a date.
Chandler: Yuh-huh.
Chandler: Well, you may wanna rethink the dirty underwear. This is basically the first time she's gonna see your underwearyou want it to be dirty?
Chandler: Oh, and uh, the fabric softener?
Chandler: There you go.
[Scene: Central Perk, Chandler and Phoebe are there, both ready to break up with their significant others.]
Chandler: Where are they? Where are they?
Chandler: It's great. Maybe tomorrow we can rent a car and run over some puppies.
Chandler: Here we go.
Chandler: Hey, Janice.
Chandler: Hey, that's not good. Can I get an espresso and a latte over here, please?
(Chandler sees Phoebe breaking up with Tony. She talks to him for a few seconds, hugs him, and then he leaves. Chandler is amazed how easy it was for her.)
Chandler: What?
Chandler: (covering) What... did you get me there?
Chandler: Bullwinkle socks. That's so sweet.
Chandler: That's great.
(The drinks arrive, and Chandler downs his espresso in one gulp.)
Chandler: Well, I'm gonna get another espresso. Can I get you another latte?
(Chandler walks over to the counter where Phoebe is, and is asking her about the break-up.)
Chandler: That's it?
Chandler: Oh, yeah, that hug looked pretty brutal.
[Scene: Central Perk, Phoebe is coaching Chandler on how to break up with Janice.]
(Chandler walks back to couch, where Janice is.)
Chandler: Janice. Hi, Janice. Ok, here we go. I don't think we should go out anymore. Janice.
[Scene: Central Perk, Chandler is still trying to ease things over with Janice, and there are about a dozen empty Espresso cups in front of him. He is extremely wired.]
Chandler: Here's the thing, Janice. You know, I mean, it's like we're different. I'm like the bing, bing, bing. You're like the boom, boom, (Chandler flails his hand out and hits Janice in the eye)... boom.
Chandler: Oh, my god, I'm so sorry. Are you ok?
Chandler: (to Phoebe) I hit her in the eye! I hit her in the eye! This is the worst break-up in the history of the world.
Phoebe: Oh my god. (Chandler downs another espresso.) How many of those have you had?
Chandler: Oh, I don't know, a million?
Phoebe: Chandler, easy, easy. Go to your happy place. La la la la la la la.
Chandler: I'm fine.
Chandler: I'm not fine. Here she comes.
(Phoebe goes over to speak to Janice. She talks to her for a few seconds, and then Janice immediately smiles, hugs her, waves to Chandler, and leaves.)
Chandler: How do you do that?
Chandler: We should always always break up together.
Rachel: Where's Chandler?
(Chandler runs by the window outside, joyous.)
Chandler: I'm free! I'm free!
(The apartment manager hung up on him and he hangs up the phone and throws in on the chair. Joey motions, "What the hell was that?" Chandler makes a face to say, "Think about it." Joey tries to divide 136 by 13; he's confused. Suddenly, light dawns on yonder dunder head. He gets it.)
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Chandler is sitting in one of the black chairs, and turns to face the other one.]
Chandler: Im coming already!!
(Rachel and Chandler slide into position.)
Chandler: Nice shooting!
Chandler: Yes, I did. I told it to Dan at work, and he said it was the funniest joke hed ever heard.
[Scene: Chandler and Monica's apartment. The table is set, and there's food on the tables again. They're all there, toasting.]
Chandler: OH MY GOD!!!
Chandler: Are you all right?!
Chandler: (lets him out) What happened?!!
Chandler: BEND OVER?!!!
Chandler: What the hell happened?!! How were you locked in?!! And where the hell is all of our stuff?!!
Rachel: Chandler gets it! Its Chandler Bing!
Chandler: SoYou got in voluntarily?!
Chandler: Oh, they said uh, You dont have insurance here, so stop calling us.
CHANDLER: I was just telling Joey about the opening in Fleischman's group.
Chandler, Monica, Joey, and Rachel: Thats a good call. Right.
Chandler: Ohh, she's pretty. Pretty ahh, pretty girl, the pretty--she's pretty.
Chandler: Oh-no, hes right.
Chandler: Wow! Really?! We get all this rusty crap for free?!
Chandler: Could we be more white trash?
Chandler: Ive got canned goods.
Rachel: Oh! Good thing Chandlers not here, he always wins at this game.
Chandler: (laughs) No. No!
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Joey is reading the paper and Chandler is getting ready for work.]
Chandler: Of course, I didnt get to enjoy any of that, because Joannas such a big, dull dud!
Chandler: Okay, I promise, Ill end it.
Chandler: I hope you know what Im giving up for ya, because shes not just the boss in your office, if you know what I mean.
Chandler: Well, not at first.
Rachel: Chandler!! (He turns around quickly) Promise me, you will end it.
Chandler: I found a dried up seashores.
Monica, Chandler, Phoebe, and Rachel: Oh yeah, I totally agree.
Chandler: Ill tell you what, I will go get them developed and you can go home.
Chandler: Well, not me. But that's what's happened, and, ah, and, and there's more. We should take a trip.
[Cut to Monica's bedroom, theyre all eating the wax, Chandler and Phoebe, dont like it. Joey tries some and makes a face like: Hey, thats not so bad.]
Chandler: Althea?! What are you doing?!
CHANDLER: (on pay phone) Come on, pick up, pick up! Hello? Transit Authority? Yes, hello. I'm doing research for a book, and I was wondering what someone might do if they left a baby on a city bus. Yes I do realize that would be a very stupid charact er.
Chandler: Okay.
Chandler: Okay. (Starts to button up his shirt)
Chandler: Thanks.
Chandler: It just doesnt feel like were breaking up.
Chandler: Im getting dressed.
Chandler: Here we go. Okay, brace yourselves.
Chandler: What is it?
Chandler: When I walk outside naked people throw garbage at me.
Chandler: You are, youre gonna leave me like this?
Chandler: Hello, Joanna (Realises he doesnt know her last name) s office.
Chandler: How little?!
Chandler: Why not?!
Chandler: What?!
Chandler: Look, this isnt funny! You get back here right now!
Chandler: Hi! (to Sophie) How are you?
(Chandler gets an idea)
(Rachel goes into talk to Chandler.)
Rachel: Y'know what Chandler, you got yourself into those cuffs, you get yourself out of them.
Chandler: No-no-no-no-no-no-no!! I cant get myself right out of them! You must have me confused with the Amazing Chandler!! Come on, you have to unlock me, she could be gone for hours, and Im cold, and (Stops and looks up the skirt on a statue behind Joannas desk.)
Chandler: I did break up with her! She just took it really, really well!
Chandler: Fine!
Chandler: Never!
Chandler: It did enter my mind! But then something happened that made it, shoot right out.
Chandler: Inever borrowed your Walkman.
Rachel: Oh, Chandler!! All right, this is it! (Grabs the key) You never see Joanna again!
Chandler: About what?
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Chandler is talking to Phoebe about her suggestion.]
Chandler: Oh-ho-ho, I dont think so!
(David and Phoebe sit down at a table close to Chandler and Monica's)
Chandler: Well, this is much better.
Chandler: Okay, this is good, this is good. All right listen, I have one. Janice likes to cuddle, at night, which, you know I'm all for. But, uh, you know when you want to go to sleep, you want some space. So, uh, how do I tell her that without, you know, accidentally calling her fat or something.
[Chandler and Monica are by the window pressuring Ross to tell his parents the truth.]
Chandler: Oh, umm, Joey was born, and then 28 years later, I was robbed!!
Chandler: Freedom! I want my freedom! Why wont you here me?! (Opens the door) Sophie, help me! Help me!! (Sophie stands up)
Chandler: Freedom!
Rachel: Chandler! Chandler, please, I have to get you locked up back the way you were, I am sooo gonna lose my job, shes very private about her office. Now I know why.
Joanna: Rachel, I need the Versachi invoice. (to Chandler) Hello! You dont work for me.
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Joey is now reading the V book, with the salesman watching.]
PHOEBE: Yeah. Oh, except one of the strings on my guitar is broken. Hey, Chandler, can I borrow your G-string?
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Phoebe and Chandler are sitting in the black chairs.]
Rachel: No, theres nothing to make up, shes gonna know that I have a key to her office, Ive got to get you locked up back the way you were! (She tries to drag him over to the chair, but Chandler stops her.)
Chandler: No!
[Scene: The hallway of Rosss building, there is a Brown Bird girl selling cookies, as Ross and Chandler come up the stairs.]
Joey: And a 50. (The salesman stops suddenly) Huh, these must be Chandlers pants.
Chandler: With extra pulp?
Chandler: No!
Chandler: You dont have it.
Chandler: (intrigued) Go on.
Chandler: You dont turn and slide, you throw it out! Im tired of having to get a tetanus shot every time I get dressed!
Rachel: Ohh, not compared to you. (Chandler nods in agreement)
Gerston: Uh, like, could these margaritas be any stronger? (They discover that Chandler is listening) Hey, Chandler.
Chandler: (hello) Hello.
Chandler: (checks his watch) Two hours, that lasted!
Chandler: I think so.
Chandler: (to Rachel) I love you. (Kisses her on the forehead)
Monica: (in a sexy voice) Hello, Chandler. (Phoebe has a huge smile on her face.)
[Scene: Central Perk, all except Chandler, are there.]
Chandler: Excuse me? You don't think I could get a Brian? Because I could get a Brian. Believe you me. ...I'm really not.
Chandler: Oh no-no-no, Im, Im paddling away!
Chandler: Airplane! Airport! Airport '75! Airport '77! Airport '79!
Chandler: Yeah, it was time. The old condom ring in the leather just doesnt say cool anymore.
Chandler: Thats our phone number. Now look, I know I kinda sprung this whole me moving out on thing, so why dont I justwhy dont I just cover you for a while?
Monica: (Picking up a card from Chandlers wallet.) My God! Is this a gym card?