words in movies
Director: OK, everyone gather up.
Director: Heres whats gonna happen. The musics gonna start, youre gonna dance, were gonna tape, you dont look at the camera. Any questions?
Director: Uh, yeah. Now you guys dance over there, you guys over there, and I want you two right around here, and everyone else spread out.
Director: (To Joey) Okay, youre dancing with that girl over there.
Director: I dont see it. (To Janine) You are dancing with the tall guy over there. Tall guy, raise your hand! (He does. Janine goes over to him.)
Director: Really, ythink so? I dont..
Director: Okay, everybody hold!
Director: Next on the platforms are (He points to the right of Ross and Monica, so they dance over to where hes pointing to. He points away from them) you two! And (He points the other way, and Ross and Monica follow his arm. Again he points away.) You two!
(The director shakes his head.)
(When they finish, they walk over to the director)
Director: Oh no! You get up there and do that again exactly like that!
Director: (To Cameraman) Make sure you get this, theyre gonna want it for the bloopers show. (To everyone) Alright cut! Listen up everyone, when we start again its gonna be the countdown to new years, so I wanna see everybodys excitement.
Director: Whats going on over here?
Director: Whats the matter with you? Get out of here!
(The director pushes the Tall Guy away)
Director: Alright were back! Ten seconds left here we go! Ten! Nine! Eight! Seven! (He continues to count as we hear Joey think)
Director: Cut!
Director: Okay, heres where we go to the live shot of Times Square, nice work everyone thats a wrap!
[Scene: Casting Director #1s office, Joey is on his first audition. His partner is an 8-year-old boy.]
Director: Lose the robe.
Director: That would work.
Director: (on phone)...Dammit, hire the girl! (He hangs up the phone.) Okay, everybody ready?
Director: No, that was clenching.
The Casting Director: So uh well the director is insisting that whoever play that part be authentically, anatomically not Jewish. Do you know what Im saying?
Casting Director No. 1: That's fine, thank you.
Casting Director No. 2: Name?
Joey: I kn-I know! I know! Okay? And apparently tomorrow when I go in to meet the director I have to take off my clothes so that they can see what my body looks like.
Casting Director No. 2: Next. (Joey walks onstage)
Joey: Oh, you know, the writing was good, and the director is good, and... and my co-star's good but they're not as good as me!
JOEY: Incredible! I met the director this time and you'll never believe who it was.
JOEY: Uh, excuse me. Jerry is the director, which one's he?
DIRECTOR: Cut.
Joey: Pheebs, you can't do that. The casting director doesn't talk to friends, she only talks to agents.
Director: And cut. Hey, Butt Guy, what the hell are you doing?
DIRECTOR: Cut.
DIRECTOR: Cut.
Director: Have fun.
Director: Lovely, just lovely.
Director: Listen Joey, we definitely want to see you for the callback on Saturday.
The Director: Peel the onion. First of all, hes good looking.
Director: All right, let's do it!
Director: No, no, no. What was that?
Director: Well, people!
The Director: Yes?
The Director: Joe. Hows it going?
The Director: You ready to go?
Director: Ah Joey. Joey Tribbiani. Listen Joey, I got a problem, I just got a call from my dance captain, he's having a relationship crisis and can't get out of Long Island.
The Director: (leaning in) Kate?
The Director: You guys make me fly! High! Okay, were gonna pick it up here, tomorrow.
The Director: (to Joey) Very nice. Very nice. (he walks away)
Director: Okay, and listen don't forget to bring your jazz shoes for the dance audition.
The Director: (returning) Okay, Im afraid to say this, but lets pick it up where we left off.
Director: Listen Joey, seeing as you've got the most experience, I want you to take these dancers and show them the combination.
The Director: All right, its time to act, my talking props. (Both Joey and Kate just look at each other.)
Joey: Well Ahh, (he sees Kate and the director kissing) yeah! Yeah, sure, a drink sounds great.
The Director: (stepping in) Excuse me. Excuse me. (to Kate) Sweetheart! (Kisses her.) Come! (They leave.)
Director: I think his butt would like to get this shot before lunch. Once again, rolling... water working... and action....and cut. What was that?
Stage Director: This will be your phone.
Stage Director: We're on in 3, 2, (points to Gary Collins.)
Stage Director: Well, here's your phone doctor. (She walks away.)
Stage Director: Back on in 30 seconds people!
The Casting Director: (stopping him) I'm sorry. Could you, could you try it without the purse?
Stage Director: No, Gary Collins is the host. You'll be answering the phones.
The Casting Director: Any time you're ready, Joey.
The Assistant Director: (to another actor) Richard? Were ready for you. (Richard approaches.) Joey Tribbiani? This is Richard Crosby hes playing Vincent.
Director: Okay, everybody, we'd like to get this in one take, please. Let's roll it.. water's working (The shower starts).. and... action.
The Casting Director: Sure. What?
The Casting Director: Okay! Thank you! That was great!
The Casting Director: Okay, anytime.
The Casting Director: I think we've seen enough!
The Casting Director: All right, let's try one.
The Casting Director: Y'know what? We need to move on.
The Casting Director: Hmm, noodle soup.
The Casting Director: Okay. Let's do it again.
The Casting Director: (entering) Okay, Raymond, Joey you're up.
Chandler: Hey, you know what you can do? I remember reading about this director, I think it was Orson Wells, who at the beginning of the movie would hire somebody, just so he could fire them in front of everybody. Then they would all know, whos boss.
Rachel: Anyway, I'm going to be the coordinator of the woman's collection, I'll work right under the director, it's the perfect, perfect job for me!
The Casting Director: Is there a problem?
Casting Director #2: No.
Casting Director #1: Whenever youre ready.
Casting Director #1: Oh my God!!
Casting Director #3: You mean dying man?
Casting Director #2: No, the line is pick a bag, so you need to pick up the bag.
[Scene: Casting Director #3s office, Joey is entering.]
Casting Director #1: Hold it. Im sorry, the surprise is a new swing set, if you could play it a little less intense?
The Director: All right, from the top.
The Director: And Action!
The Casting Director: Okay, uh well, let's try one. Whenever you guys are ready. (Some dude puts down a couple bowls of soup in front of them.)
The Director: Uh sure.
The Director: Action!
The Director: Cut!!!!!!!!!! (Joey starts screaming again.)
The Director: All right! Lets try this again! You ready Joe?
Joey: Hi Alex! (to the director) And uh, as you can see my hands are not in my pants. (Holds them both up.)
Stage Director: No you answer it and take pledges.
The Casting Director: Okayyyy! Anddd, go!
[Scene: Joey's audition, the director has returned and wants to see the combination.]
The Casting Director: (entering) Okay uh, we have narrowed it down to Raymond, Ben, Kyle, and Joey. The rest of you, thank you very much.
The Director: Cut! Alex, remember youre supposed to cry. Can you cry for us this time?
JOEY: So, assistant to the director. That's a really exciting job, I mean, you must have a ton of cool responsibilities.
Ross: Oh! (Does a laugh/groan.) Listen umm, I, I just stopped by to see if you wanted to see this play tonight. Umm, its supposed to be excellent. The director is the same
Casting Director #2: Thats where you pick up the bag.
The Casting Director: Umm, do you sell these bags?
The Casting Director: Okay.
The Director: Cut!
The Director: Cut! That was great everybody! Thank you!
The Director: And cut!
Joey: "Take could care of your Momma son." (Alex just looks at him and the director motions for him to continue so he tries it again.) "Take could care of your Momma son." (Alex does nothing.) "Come on son! Your Mommas good people!"
The Casting Director: Hi-hi Joey.
[Scene: A Casting Directors Office, Joey is entering for his callback.]
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Joey is telling Monica what the casting director was trying to get too.]
(The casting director shakes her head.)
The Casting Director: Well, the director thinks youre really right for the part and wants to meet you tomorrow.
The Casting Director: Wait Joey! You didnt need to come down because the director saw your tape from yesterday and loved it.
The Director: Oh thats great! Okay, well Ive heard everything I need to hear. I just need to uh, Leslie
The Director: Yeah.
[Scene: The casting directors office, Joey is there to show off to the director, so to speak.]
The Casting Director: Joey, this is awkward part.
The Assistant Director: (approaching) Hey Joey! Were ready.