words in movies
JOEY: Naa, they said that when they found my body, my brain was so smashed in that the only doctor that could have saved me was me. Supposed to be some kind of irony or somethin.
(As hes talking Monica notices someone familiar has just entered the restaurant. Lets see; I seem to remember him driving a Ferrari in Hawaii solving crimes as a private investigator and as a certain eye doctor in more recent times.)
MONICA: Doctor, can I see you for just a minute please? My brother has a slight phobia about needles.
The Doctor: Hes doing just fine, hes resting now, but you can see him in a little bit.
Ross: Um, that is because my doctor says that I have a very serious.... nuget.... diffency.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Monica is recovering from her haircut, Phoebe is playing her doctor and is coming in from the bedroom.]
Rachel: Did you tell the doctor you did it jumping up and down on your bed?
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's, Joey and Phoebe are there as Rachel and Ross return from the doctors appointment.]
Cliff: I dont believe this. You got him to pretend he was some fake doctor?
Rachel: Yes, his name is Barry, hes a doctor, thank you very much.
Chandler: Let me see what you wrote about yourself: "Doctor Paleontology, two kids... " (pause) You split with Carol because you have different interests?... I think you split with Carol because you've one very similar interest!
Rachel: Excuse me, Dr. Bobby happens to be an excellent doctor.
ROSS: Who's Richard Burke? Doc, Doctor Burke? You have a date with Doctor Burke? Why, why, why should that bother me? I, I love that man, he's like a uh, brother to dad.
Phoebe: All right. Im gonna go to the fertility doctor and um, see if Im ready to have Frank and Alices embryo transferred into my uterus.
Ross: Yeah, Im gonna go to a doctor who went to school in a mini-mall.
Chandler: The doctor.
Ross: (stopping her from falling) Okay, okay. Look, you have got to go to a doctor! Okay?
The Doctor: (seeing theyre not identical) But uh, this is a study for identical twins.
Richard: Yeah hes no good. Do you ever (pause) think about me in a (pause) non-eye doctor way?
[Scene: The Doctors office, Dr. Zane is examining Phoebe as Frank and Alice watch.]
Rachel: Honey, maybe we should take you to a doctor.
MONICA: That's good, have a seat. Um, the doctor says it's gotta be a needle. You're just gonna have to be brave, ok? Can you do that for me?
Doctor: Ill be right with you. Okay? (to the nurse) Thanks, Wendy.
Monica: Oh no-no-no, not Dr. Burke. Dr. Burke is out of town. The-the on-call doctor will see me now.
Monica: Oh my God! How cute is the on-call doctor?
Phoebe: Well, a palm reader, a manicurist, a hand doctor
Amy: Seriously? Its.. its just these rooms? <moves hands around motioning 'just these rooms'> <To Ross> I thought you were a doctor.
Joey: Doctor? Wow! I didnt know he had a nickname.
JOEY: Alright look, that's it. I don't think we should see each other anymore, alright. Look, I know I should have told you this a long time ago but I am not Drake Remore, OK. I'm not even a doctor, I'm an actor. I just pretend to be a doctor.
The Doctor: No, Im getting three separate heartbeats.
The Doctor: (coming in from surgery) Somebody lose a ring?
(The doctor, Dr. Harad, enters.)
Phoebe: Now, are you sure you dont want to go see a doctor?
Phoebe: You mean like a doctor?
The Doctor: Thats it.
The Doctor: Actually, giving birth to three babies isnt that different from giving birth to one.
The Doctor: Doctors are wrong all the time.
The Doctor: Definitely. (Points out each head on the ultrasound.)
Rachel: Honey, listen, y'know what? The nurse said the doctor is wonderful.
[Cut to Joey's room, his doctor and Ross are there.]
Joey's Doctor: Kidney stones!
(Phoebe fakes pain to get Ross looking for another doctor.)
[Scene: The delivery room, Ross has returned with another doctor. This one, is well, younger.]
[Scene: Joey's room, his doctor, Chandler, and Monica are there.]
Phoebe: Okay, doctor says any minute now.
Stage Director: Well, here's your phone doctor. (She walks away.)
Joey's Doctor: Would you like to see them? (He hands Joey a little jar.)
Joey's Doctor: Are you ready? It's time to try peeing. (Joey makes a face like he is trying to pee.) Wait-wait-wait-wait-wait! It's almost time to try peeing. (Points at the bottle Joey is to pee into.)
Joey's Doctor: It's kidney stones.
The Doctor: It says here that the knife went right through your shoe.
The Doctor: What do we got here?
DOCTOR: No, it's just a good bone bruise. And, right here is the puncture wound from your ring.
The Doctor: Did you bring the toe?
The Doctor: You brought a carrot.
The Doctor: This isn't your toe, this is a small, very cold piece of carrot.
Monica: No, my eye doctor is Richard! I cant go to him when I dont have a boyfriend!
Rachel: Hi, Pheebs? Okay, so just spoke to the nurse and the reason that your doctor is late is because uh, she's not coming.
Monica: Oh yes! I have it right here, on ice! (She takes a bag of ice out of her purse and hands it to the doctor.)
The Doctor: Hi Rachel!
Monica: (To Rachel) Wow! It's really red! You should go see my eye doctor.
Chandler: So Dan, nurse not a doctor huh? Kinda girlie isn't it?
Chandler: This sounds like a hernia. You have toyou-you go to the doctor!
(Rachel heads for the door but is intercepted by the doctor.)
Ross: What, you didnt get it? The doctor is a monkey.
Phoebe: (interrupting) What are you doing?!! Why are you defending him?! Just get me another doctor! One who is not crazy and who is not Fonzie!
Joey: Uh, really good. Really good. Yeah, I should be ready to kill myself any day now. (Chandler returns with a bobby pin and hands it to Joey.) Wow, you sure found that quick. (He tries the pin in the lock.) I justI wish I didnt feel this way about Rachel anymore, yknow? I wish things could go back to normal. I mean, I love living with her and God, helping out with the baby is just amazing, but now I think I think Ross feels left out. Yknow? When I had to take Rachel to the hospital, the doctor thought I was the father. God You shouldve seen the look on Rosss face. (Pause) By the way, I have no idea what Im doing here. For all I know Im just locking it more. Oh hey, did you try opening it with a credit card?
The Doctor: I'm Dr. Miller. Monica told me you were a little nervous, but don't worry everything's gonna be just fine.
Monica: Hey Rach, come on! We're gonna be late for the eye doctor appointment!
The Doctor: But, youre not identical twins.
Dr. Drake Remoray: Thats right Wesley! I just stopped by to say that, youre not a real doctor! And that womans brain, is fine!
DOCTOR: Hello, there. I'm Dr. Carlin. I see someone's having an allergic reaction.
[Scene: Dr. Burkes office, Rachel and Monica are waiting as the doctor arrives.]
Phoebe: Oh yeah, the doctor said that could be one of the side effects.
[Scene: Another hospital room, Joey has now been admitted and his doctor is about to break the bad news to him, Monica, and Chandler.]
Monica: Yeah but it was because I-I had an eye exam and I dont like my new eye doctor.
The Doctor: (entering) (To the receptionist) Can I have the next one please? (Takes the form.) Joey and Tony Tribbiani. (Joey and Carl stand up.)
Chandler: Is that a hint? Because we love you Doctor Connelly but we don't think we'd want you to be our child! (Dr. Connelly glares at him) Wow, talking about an inhospitable environment!
Rachel: Well, lets see. Uh, they gave me cute doctor today and in the middle of the exam I put my pinky in his chin dimple.
Ross: Yknow we should probably ask the doctor if she even knows how to deliver a baby thats half human and half pure evil!
Chandler: Rachel, what is the deal with you and doctors, anyway? Was, like, your father a doctor?
Doctor: Well, you don't have that much time to relax. The other one will be along in a minute.
Phoebe: Hey! So how was the doctor?
Nurse: The doctor will be here in a minute to do your sonogram.
Mr. Geller: Doctor Ross Geller.
Dr. Schiff: Im a doctor.
Phoebe: Well the doctor says it takes a couple days, but my bodys always been a little faster than Western medicine.
Joey: No way! Kay look, if I have to go to the doctor for anything its gonna be for this thing sticking out of my stomach! (Rolls over and shows Chandler.)
Ross: So, I uh I called the doctor and now we both know the sex of the baby.
Rachel: Hi! Oh, Ross, dont forget, we have that doctors appointment tomorrow!
[Scene: The Doctors Office, the doctor is writing something as Rachel is on the table, and Ross is standing.]
Phoebe: Oh hey! So, how did your doctors appointment go?
Monica: I-It's just so insulting! Big spring for a new blank tape, Doctor!
Phoebe: (on phone) Hi! Yeah, Im calling on behalf of Monica Gellers eye, and is um, is Richard Burke in today. (Listens) (to Monica) Hes out of town, but does she want to see the on-call doctor?
Doctor: Oh, here is your beautiful baby. Congratulations!
Joey: Well what do I know?! Im not a doctor!
Rachel: Thank you doctor. (Dr. Long exits.) (To Joey) Oh thank you for being so nice and calm.
[Scene: The Hospital, Joey is in the waiting room as Rachel comes back out with the doctor.]
Rachel: Well, yknow what? I go see my doctor tomorrow, Ill ask her about this. Maybe she can give me a pill or something.
Rachel: Oh. Oh yeah, dont get to worked up over it. I mean it-it sounds like hes a doctor, but hes not.
Chandler: This sounds like a hernia. You have toyou-youGo to the doctor!
Ross: Uh, do you wanna go change first? The doctors keeping the office open late for us, but if you hurry