words in movies
[Scene: An Emergency Room, Rachel and Monica enter. Rachel is limping and leaning on Monica for support.]
[Scene: The Hospital, Monica and Rachel are waiting for the doctors to arrive. They enter and are played by Noah Wyle and George Clooney.]
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, everyone but Joey is waiting for Phoebe to arrive for her surprise birthday party. Rachel and Monica is telling Chandler about Rachel's incident.]
Rachel: Not stupid. The very cute, cute, cute doctors asked us out for tomorrow night, and I said "yes."
Monica: I think it's totally insane, I mean, they work for the hospital. It's like returning to the scene of the crime. You know, I say we blow off the dates.
Rachel: What? Monica, they are cute, they are doctors, (spelling it out in the air for her slow friend) cute doctors, doctors who are cute!
(There is a knock at the door. Someone turns the music off, then the whole party runs and hides, except for Monica and Rachel who answer their door. Ross stands in the doorway, holding a box, but everyone is too keyed up to notice that it's him.)
Mr. Geller: 'Cause there's time to make up for that. We can do stuff together. You always wanted to go to that Colonial Williamsburg. How 'bout we do that?
(Monica opens the door for Dr. Mitchell and Dr. Geoffrey.)
Monica: A wuss? Excuse me for living in the real world, okay?
(Rachel brightly limps back across the apartment with glasses of wine for the cute doctors, leaving an open-mouthed Monica in her wake.)
Dr. Rosen: Good for you.
Rachel: Would you excuse me for a second?
(Completely undone by Monica's verbal destruction, Rachel almost loses her balance as she staggers backwards, eyes agog, gasping for breath, and literally not knowing which way to turn. Finally, she escapes into the bathroom while a resigned Dr. Mitchell looks philosophically at Dr. Rosen who seems about remind him of the good old days at the pagan altar.)
Phoebe: Oh, no. Don't you hate it when people aren't there for you?
Joey: I've been trying for two days. When I called the restaurant, they said she was too busy to talk. I can't believe she's blowin' me off.
Ursula: Right... Oh, I got something for you, too.
(A waiter comes over for the stolen chicken. Ursula turns to him.)
(Trying not to wrinkle her nose, Phoebe smiles back realising it's down to her to make up for her negligent sister. Meanwhile, Ursula still hasn't received her side salad, but when she attempts to attract the waiter's attention, he ignores her.)
Rachel: (as Monica) Yeah, and and, I'm just gonna pay for this with a check.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Chandler is neglecting the game of Scrabble, for he's busily drawing on his own childhood in an attempt to help Ross. Marcel chitters about.]
Ross: Yours, I just got 43 points for 'KIDNEY'.
Chandler: No, no, you got zero points for 'IDNEY'.
Nurse: Excuse me... This hospital is for people!
(Rachel, Monica, Ross and Chandler whip around for a second time, in formation.)
[Scene: Central Perk, Joey is playing "She Loves Me, She Loves Me Not" with the petals of a flower, alternately looking hopeful and annoyed. Phoebe enters, but not as herself, for she has changed the style of her hair and make-up to match that of her twin sister. She hangs up her coat, revealing her new cardigan. Nervously, she smooths out the identifying garment, approaching Joey who sits next to the main sofa.]
(Phoebe smiles, when Joey takes her face in his hands and kisses her. Joey gets up to leave but stops suddenly. Phoebe silently shouts "Oh, whoa!!" to herself, and leans back in the sofa to recover, a hand to her tingling lips. A thoughtful Joey is also feeling his lips, so he hesitates for a moment, then returns for a better view, he thinks again, cocking his head from side to side to regard her profile from various angles, then...)
(The others rush to the window for a look.)
[Scene: Silvercup Studios, Joey has won the part of dying man and is now able to play the role he was injured for. Chandler is helping to carry him in.]
Ross: (he starts reading directly from his cards word for word very quietly) "There are three primary theories concerning sediment flow rate. Each of these theories can be further subcategorized into two distinct "
Phoebe: No! No! I-I meant for the baby!
Joshua: This is so nice. Thank you for doing this.
Phoebe: Thats short for Phoebe?! I thought that was just what we called each other!
Mrs. Burgin: Hello. Well, Joshua, that $500 was for groceries.
(Chandler crawls over to Monica and they move in to kiss, but they cant do it and back up. They move in to kiss again, and kiss very awkwardly for a second, until someone knocks on the door.)
CHANDLER: No actually, I was just going for colorful.
RACH: I can see that. I... just one phone call, I'll be very quick, I'll even pay for it myself. [man is still reluctant] OK, you're bein' a little weird about your phone.
Susan: (To Emily) Thanks for everything, I had such a great time.
Monica: Electrical plans for the building.
Ross: Oh, I know. Yknow what, I never wouldve gotten this if it werent for you. No really, when Im with you Im-Im like this whole other guy, I love that guy! I mean, I love you too, a lot, but that guy! I-I love that guy!
RACHEL: Well, I was thinking maybe a um, a romantic dinner with um, candles and wine and then uh, maybe going back to my place for um, dessert.
Chandler: Night-night.....Janice. (he starts thinking to him self) 'Look at all that room on her side, you good fit a giant penguin over there. That would be weird though. Okay, hug and roll time. I'm huggin', I'm huggin', your rollin', and....yes! Freedom! (his one arm is still under her) Except for this arm! I'm stuck. Stuck arm! Okay, time for the old table cloth trick, one fluid motion. Quick like a cat, quick like a cat! And 1...2...3!' (Pulls his arm out from under her and she is spun off of the bed.)
Ross: Huh, I don't know what to pick. Am I more thankful for my divorce or my eviction? Hmm.
Joey: Come on man, you know Id do it for you! Because, youre my best friend.
JOEY: And for Ross, Mr. Sweet-tooth.
(Both Joey and Chandler and Monica and Rachel jump up and down for joy.)
Emily: Weve only known each other for six weeks!
Monica: As a thank you, Rachel and I will kiss for one minute.
Ross: We, we just decided to uh, to go for it.
Phoebe: Well, Im going to the dentist, so listen, okay, just be on the look out for anything that, that, that you can fall into, or, or that can fall on you, or... All right, just look out! Okay, And um, I also just wanna, I just wanna tell you all that um...... (starts to cry and runs out)
[Cut to London, Chandlers hotel room. He is getting ready for bed by doing push-ups. One push-up. Just as he gets under the covers, theres a knock on the door.]
Monica: Guys, could you please just stop throwing the ball for one minute and just help me find it!
Rachel: Sorry. Im so exited! Ive been waiting for this for months! I got my hair coloured! I got new sheets! Im making him a very fancy meal.
Robert: We could write it down for you?
Phoebe: Oh, okay! (reading) "Would I go back to Allesandros? Sure, but Id have to order two meals, one for me and one for the guy pointing the gun to my head." (to Monica) Wow! You really laid into this place.
Rachel: Well, actually, I meant for me. The hiring committee is meeting people all day and
ROSS: Hey, we can rescedule for Saturday.
Monica: Ill pick it up for you!
Chandler: Well, Chandler will be there for you too. I mean, well, he might be a little late, but-but, hell be there. And hell bring you some cold soda, if want you need him for is that youre really hot.
Ross: Youre great. And I-I know someday this will happen for you too. You just hang in there.
Phoebe Sr.: Sorry. But just one last thing. Y'know you came looking for family. Im family, Im it. Now, now Im done. (starts to leave)
Joey: Huh, Rach I got to say its gonna take a lot of money for me to go out on a date with a dude.
Monica: Can you just hold on for one minute?
Rachel: Ohh, here you are. I was looking for you before. Joshuas gone so you and Emily are free to go.
Ross: No, it's for when Carol goes into labor. She can get me wherever I am. I mean, all she has to do is to dial 55-JIMBO.
Rachel: Honey, why is it hard, I mean we've been together for almost a year now?
Chandler: So uh, what are you in for?
Chandler: Okay, there are no famous Joeys. Except for, huh, Joey Buttafucco.
Rachel: Yeah, I-I heard. (Pause, everyone looks at each other, waiting for Rachels reaction.) I think its great! (Hugs Ross.) Ohh, Im so happy for you!
Chandler: (writes what Joey said and waits for him to go on) Yeah?
Rachel: Yeah, well, you uh, better make it for three.
Ross: Y'know what I didnt wear this suit for a year because you hated it. Well, guess what? Youre not my girlfriend anymore so...
Emily: No. But, Monica and I were talking, and-and I was so upset about the hall being knocked down, and she suggested that we put the wedding off for a bit.
Monica: Would you ever be a surrogate for anyone?
Chandler: All right, all right, Ill go sleep with my girlfriend. But Im just doing it for you guys.
Phoebe: Hey! You guys, Im writing a holiday song for everyone. Do you want to hear it?
[Scene: The Laundromat, Rachel is fighting with that old, annoying woman for a cart.]
Ross: Okay. Umm, for a while now, I've been wanting to, um....
Ross: You had no right to tell me you ever had feelings for me.
Chloe: Thats so great for you guys!
BIG BULLY: Ok, nothing from the neck up. [everyone gets ready for the fight] Or the waist down. Dana's ovulating.
Joey: Well, so, stay for the museums!
[Scene: The hallway, Rachel is convincing Ross that Emily is good for him.]
Phoebe: Yes. But I left in the Ys. 'Cause, y'know, "sometimes y". Uh, I also have something else for you. (She searches in her purse.)
Cheryl: So, thank you for the delicious dinner.
Ross: Ok, no, no, you hang up. You, you, y(Rachel grabs the phone and hangs it up for him.)
Joey: He broke up with Julie. Well, go hug her, for god's sakes.
Chandler: Because youve only known her for six weeks! Okay, Ive got a carton of milk in my fridge Ive had a longer relationship with!
Janice: Yeah, well, it scares me! I mean I not even divorced yet, Chandler. You know, you just invited me over here for pasta, and all of the sudden you're talking about moving in together. And, and I wasn't even that hungry. You know what, it's getting a little late, and I-I should just, um...(starts to leave)
Monica: You know what this is, this is us getting ready for the prom.
[Scene: The park, everyone is warming up for the rugby game. Only Joey and Phoebe came to support Ross.]
Rachel: Handling it? What do you mean, handling it? Theres nothing to handle. Now, maybe I would have a problem with this if it wasnt for me and Joshua. Yknow, theyre not gonna get married anyway!
Charlton Heston: (tosses him a towel, motions for him to get out of the shower and sits down on the couch) Every actor at one time or anotheropp! (Joey tries to sit down next to him and Heston makes him sit somewhere else.) Every actor thinks he stinks, even Lawrence Oliver at sometimes thought he stank, Bob Redford wont even watch himself.
Ross: So uh, any ideas for the bachelor party yet?
Monica: The baby shower for Phoebe!
Monica: Well honestly ever since we got engaged I have been waiting for something to, to flip you out.
Ross: Oh, that is so sweet.(listens) No, no, ok, you hang up. Ok, ok, one, two, three.(He doesn't hang up and motions for Rachel to be quiet.) Well you didn't hang up either.
Chandler: Oh, Im Ross. Im Ross. Im too good for the Hut; Im too good for the Hut.
JOEY: Yeah, my agent just called me with an audition for Days of Our Lives!
Gunther: (to Ross) Thanks for not marrying Rachel. (He starts to leave.)
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's apartment, Joey is there, trying to convince Monica to pose as his girlfriend. His plan is to hook Monica up with Angela's boyfriend Bob and then take Angela back for himself.]
[Rachel, seeing what he did for her, gets up, walks across the room, and kisses Ross]
Phoebe: What the hell is this?! What, did you actually thought it would make me feel better to give me stuff that I cant use for another two months?! This sucks! All right, whats my next present?!
Joey: I was uh, I was thinking I might want to pick one of those babies up for myself, I might want to get one of those
(They all cheer and Rachel, Ross and Phoebe join in for a group hug. Joey also joins, but he stands back a bit, because he is all sticky of the food on him)
Big Nosed Rachel: Not for me. Chip and I broke up!
Monica: Myself. Yknow for remembering to pack a thing. Yeah, you do a good thing, you get a check! (pause) My mom does it, I never realized it was weird.
Joey: I don’t know. She’s got to be taking it hard, I was like her only client. Except for this guy who eats paper. And I’m guessing he eats more money than he makes. Look, I know she’s not a great agent, but she did stick with me for ten years. I’m gonna call her and hire her again.
Friend No. 2: Oh, isnt it exciting, I mean its like having a boyfriend for life.
Phoebe: So-so, what do you want for lunch?
Joey: Well, I like it. Here you go. (He pays for the hat.)
Rachel: Thanks for lunch, Chandler. Y'know, you didnt have to walk me all the way back up here.
Joey: Sh-shh-shh! (He motions for her to watch something he has taped.)
Monica: I can�t believe I did this. I can�t believe I'm singing for the people, and they liked me! Hey, did you hear thatone shouting �look at those tips�! I mean, did I really help you get a lot of tips?
Joey: Hi, uh, I'll be reading for the role of Mercutio.
(He brought home Chandler for Thanksgiving. Chandler is sporting the very popular Flock of Seagulls haircut. Yeah, it's another you have to see it to believe it kinda thing.)
Phoebe: No no no, Ill be nice, I swear!!! Could you just give me the number for where they are?
Kathy: Oh. Well uh, (to Chandler) you not being able to talk may make this easier. Listen umm (She looks at the gang who are watching, they take the hint and leave them alone.) Listen I dont wanna be someone who comes between two best friends. I just, I cant stand seeing what this is doing to you guys, and I dont wanna be the cause of that. So, I dont think we can see each other anymore. Im gonna go to my moms in Chicago, Im gonna stay there for awhile. I think this couldve be something really amazing, but yknow this is probably for the best. Yknow? Im gonna miss you. Good-bye, Chandler.
Monica: Okay, all right dont judge me to much. Okay? Um, but I saw this info-mercial, and um, I swear to you I have never-ever bought anything on TV before, except for this mop. But there was this stuff on leg waxing, it just, it looked so amazing....
Eric: Absolutely. (They kiss and Phoebe heads for the door.) I love the way you kiss.
Mr. Geller: This bill for my half of the wedding. its insane.
Fat Monica: Umm, Chandler, if you want I can make you some macaroni and cheese for dinner.
Mr. Geller: Theres no way in hell, Im paying for it.
Rachel: I uh, I have two tickets to the Knicks game tonight if youre interested, just as a thank you for this week.
ROSS: [approaching the mover holding the parrot] Hey hold on, hold on. How much for the uh, how much to save the bird?
Joey: Okay. (They both walk off to watch for Rachel.)
Ticket Counter Attendant: (on the P.A.) This is the final boarding call for Flight 664 to Yemen.
Mrs. Waltham: (Slapping the phone into Joeys chest.) Joey theres a girl on the phone for you.