words in movies
[Scene: Central Perk, continued from earlier, Chandler is sitting on the table.]
[Scene: Monica's Bedroom, continued from earlier.]
[Scene: Chandler's office, he and Phoebe are taking a break from work.]
Ross: Oh, well this morning he got a call from who I think was our cousin Nathan, and frankly, it was a little more than I needed to know.
(Ross, Rachel and Joey come back from the bathroom. They discover that Monica and Ethan aren't finished talking to each other yet.)
(Ross runs from the table, over the couch but slips and falls onto the floor)
(Chandler struts out from his apartment)
(Rachel comes out from their apartment with a mirror and a lipstick in her hands)
Joey: All right, all right. (he comes out from their apartment with a huge sandwich in his hand)
(Monica enters from their apartment, crying)
[Scene: Central Perk, Joey is getting a phone number from a woman (Casey) as Chandler watches from the doorway.]
Ross: Okay, theres this guy, Warren, from the museum and hes going on a dig for like two years and hes got this great place he needs to sublet. So uh, you interested?
Joey: (sadly) There will come a time in each of your careers when youll have a chance to screw over another soap opera actor. I had such an opportunity in the recent, present. And Im ashamed to say that I took it, I advised a fellow actor to play a role, homosexually. Yeah, we both auditioned for the part, and uh, as it turned out, they ah, they liked the stupid gay thing and cast him. And now, hes got a two year contract opposite Susan Luchhi, the first lady of daytime television, and me, me Im stuck here teaching a bunch of people, most of whom are too ugly to even be on TV. Im sorry, Im sorry, Im sorry. (he gets a huge round of applause from his students.) Thank you.
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's, Rachel is balancing her checkbook as Joey enters from his room wearing a hockey helmet, gloves, and shin guards.]
[Scene: Central Perk, Phoebe is sitting on couch and Rachel is getting some coffee. Phoebe keeps turning her head from to keep from looking at Rachel.]
Monica: (entering from the bathroom) Hey Rach, a guy from Ralph Lauren called, you got a second interview!
(She goes over and tries to give Phoebe a massage. Phoebe yelps in pain and jumps away from her.)
PHOEBE: Yeah, I talked to my grandma about the Old Yeller incident, and she told me that my mom used to not show us the ends of sad movies to shield us from the pain and sadness. You know, before she killed herself.
Joey: (drinks from the glass and puts it back in the fridge) Yep, it's fat. I drank fat!
Phoebe: (entering from Rachel's bedroom) I found it!
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, it's continued from before the commercial break.]
[Scene: Rachels office, Chandler and her are coming back from lunch.]
Monica: I'm going into business people. I'm sick and tired of being depressed about Richard. I needed a plan, a plan to get over my man. What's the opposite of man? Jam. (sees Joey trying some jam from the pot) Oh Joey don't! It's way to hot. (Joey realizes this and spits what he had in his mouth back into the pot.)
Caitlin: (from outside) Pizza!
Joey: (to his grandmother) That's uh, scenes from next week's show. Next week's!
[Cut back to the living room. Chandler slowly exits the bathroom and gets pushed from behind by Monica and sees Phoebe closing the apartment door.]
Eric: Hi, its Eric. From the Halloween party, Ursulas fianc�e.
Joey: (returning from a deli) Okay, I got it! This place makes the best sandwich in the world!
Chandler: Okay, then you gotta back away, all right? You dont need that kindve hurt. Take it from a guy whos never had a long term relationship......
Ross: (from his apartment) Man! They cannot get enough! (Makes like he's a robot and waves at the cutouts.)
Rachel: Hey! Hey! (Stops Caitlin) Hi! Hey-hey-hey, I'm Rachel! From upstairs? The ones with all the pizza?
Joey: Oh no-no, no for I second there I counted six fingers, but one was from the other hand so were good.
Ross: Emily is incredible. I mean there-there are no words to describe it, I mean the whole weekend was like a dream. (Sees Rachel coming back from the bathroom.) Oh! And you! Rach!
(Neither of them turns around from watching the chick and the duck look for the tasty treat.)
KEVIN: All right. It's no big deal. BILL: So, she has a boyfriend. What is your situation? RACHEL: Oh, well, it's complicated. I don't actually have a boyfriend.� But um. . . BILL: Then, can I have your number? RACHEL: (pause) I'm sorry, no. BILL: Okay. (They start to walk away.) RACHEL: Oh sure.� (She pulls a business card from her purse and writes on it.) PHOEBE: (Reading the card.) Oh my God, you're giving your real number. BILL: Okay, thanks. I'll give you a call later tonight. RACHEL: Great. BILL: Bye PHOEBE: Bye. (The guys leave.) Wow. So, that's great. You, Bill, Ross, and Emma are going to be so happy together. What were you thinking?
Monica: Anyway, were really excited about our wedding plans, and well I guess pretty soon well be making a big withdrawal from the Monica wedding fund. (Chandler and her laugh, but her parents dont.) What?
Phoebe: No, as soon as something opens up we'll move right in. Unless it doesn't have a pool, I need a pool. (Turns away from him.)
Chandler: All guys that are awake. Then we go to sleep and then all the guys from the other end of the world wake up and behave the exact same way.
Phoebe: Oh that's my grandma. (Joey holds the box away from him.) And thanks Joey she's having a really great time. (Joey is happy now.)
Joey: (on phone from Vegas) Hey Monica, it's Joey!
Monica: (entering from her bedroom) Pheebs, youve been up for 24 hours! Go to sleep, honey. Th-this isnt healthy.
Monica: See now-now youre taking them away from their home.
Joey: No. No. No. She lives on the third floor, eighth apartment from the left.
Monica: (grabbing the gift from him and opening it) Okay! There you go! It's two tickets to Vegas!
Phoebe: Oh, it's your audition from this morning. Can I use the phone again?
(Rachel throws the alcohol in the fire. A burst of flames shoots up from it.)
(Joey wants to know, but Chandler doesnt want to discuss it by the chick, so he and Joey move over to the windows and away from the chick.)
JOEY: [walks out of his room] Hey, this is ridiculous. I'll tell you what. After I get back from my neice's christening, I'll go down to the coffee house with you and we'll all have a nice cup of coffee alright. No problem, Joey's there.
[Scene: Central Perk, the guys are returning from the ride along to find Phoebe already there.]
[Scene: Central Perk. Ross is getting coffee as Joey comes from God knows where! Some back area of Central Perk around the corner that weve never seen! Weeeiiirrrddd .]
Joey: (exiting from Chandlers room with the new roommate) Everything on your application looks really goodOhh! Just one last question umm, are you and your friends gonna be over here all the time like partying and hanging out?
Rachel: It's the woman from the hospital admissions office. She says there's a problem with the form. Oh, god, oh god...
The Cigarette Smoking Guy: (No, not the Cigarette Smoking Man from The X-Files.) Well, maybe you and your baby should go to another strip club.
Joey: Hey Pheebs! Listen, this wooden box keeps sliding out from under the seat. What-what is it?
A Waiter: (entering) Hey, dragon! Heres your tips from Monday and Tuesday. (hands him two envelopes)
Monica: (entering from her bedroom) I gotta go to work. Has anybody seen my left boob?
[Scene: The Craps table, continued from earlier.]
Monica: (to Phoebe) Remember that guy from cooking school I told you about that put cilantro with everything?
Gunther: (bringing Chandler a cup) This is from the woman at the bar.
[Scene: Chandler, Joey, and Ross's, continued from earlier.]
[Scene: Central Perk, continued from earlier. Rachel starts laughing.]
Phoebe: Okay, those are my sunglasses, you borrowed them from me.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Phoebe is recovering from her false labour.]
(Ross returns from getting some coffee.)
[Scene: Central Perk, continued from earlier.]
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, the scene is continued from where we left off before the break.]
Monica: (entering from the bathroom) Hey! Happy Anniversary!
Ross: (entering from the bathroom) Hey roomies!
Phoebe: Hang on! Hang on! Hang on! (Answering the phone.) Go!! Whos this? (Listens) Oh okay, youre gonna like working for me. Whats your name? (Listens) What kind of name is Brendy? I Whatever Stop talking! All right, from now on your name is Joan. You can pick your own last name.
[Scene: Chandler, Joey, and Ross's; continued from earlier. Joey is closing the door after Rachel leaves and is about to confront Chandler and Monica.]
Rachel: (entering from her room) Pheebs, I wanna ask you something.
Phoebe: Okay, what about after I give you these candies? (Hands them each one from her purse.)
Joey: Good evening. Im Mr. Tribbiani. And I will be teaching acting for soap operas. Now um, on my first day as (proudly) Dr. Drake Remoray on Days of Our Lives, (looks for a reaction from his students, and gets none.) I learned that one of the most important things in soap opera acting is reacting, this does not mean acting again, it means, you dont have a line, but someone else just did. And it goes like this. (looks all intense for a moment and then gasps, the students cheer him) Thanks, thanks, a lot. Oh, by the way, before I forget to work in soap operas some of you will have to become much more attractive. All right, moving right along.
Monica: You stole them from me!
Rachel: You stole them from me!!
Chandler: Don't think of it as a cigarette. Think of it as the thing that's been missing from your hand. When you're holding it, you feel right. You feel complete.
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Phoebe, Joey, Chandler, and Monica are returning from Central Perk.]
The Director: All right, from the top.
[Scene: The Wedding Chapel, continued from last season. Chandler and Monica are about to get married.]
(Phoebe gets up from the table, and while her back is turned, Rachel and Monica indicate via sign language that they each would have picked the other.)
Russell: Yes, this Russell, Rosss divorce lawyer, just tell him that since I havent heard from him, I assume hes decided to give the marriage a try.
Woman: (the same one from before approaches) Hi Joey.
All: (they all recoil from the smell emanating from him) Oh! God! Wow!
(There is a cry of disappointment from the crowd of men.)
Rachel: (entering from her room) Pheebs, I was wondering
[cut to Phoebe and Rachel as Monica returns from the bathroom]
Monica: (entering from her room) Hey!
Rachel: So-so, you missed a message from who? Chandler or your mom? Or Chandler? Or your mom?
Joey: Look, I just need a wire something to jimmy it. Oh hey, one of you guys give me the underwire from your bra!
Chandler: Yeah, at least you hid your feelings well about it. (Removes a smashed racquet from his bag.)
Rachel: "Im Monica, I dont get phone messages from interesting people. Ever!"
[Scene: Rosss apartment, Chandler is trying to get Joeys money back from Ross.]
Phoebe: (calling from her room) Are you under the sheet?
Chandler: So, uh, wh-where ya from?
Monica: What are you talking about? (Pointing out the window.) She obviously lives on the second floor, seventh apartment from the left!
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's apartment. Chandler and Joey are returning from their brunch.]
Chandler: Yes, but I feel like Ive really gotten in touch with my feminine side enough today. You know. In fact I think were two sachets away from becoming a lesbian couple.
Rachel: Sure, Ill just sit next to the trans-sexual from purchasing.
Rachel: (entering from her bedroom) All right! Let's get this over with! Ugh! (She walks by the table and notices that no one is looking and accidentally on purpose knocks over the open cereal box.) Ohhh! No! Look what I did! (She starts walking through the mess. {Also, notice the continuity error in this scene. Note the position of the box and dispersal pattern of the cereal before and after the camera cut.}) Oh, I mean, look at this mess! I mean, we're probably gonna have to clean this up! Y'know? We're gonna have to reschedule!
Joey: (shocked) From the land down under? I didn't know that either!
Rachel: Oh, Kim, Hi. (Kim doesnt even look up from her report.)
(Another professor walks down from the back of the lecture hall.)
[Scene: The street down the block from Central Perk, Joey has found the Porsche and is writing the note.]
Joey: (running from his bedroom) Oh my God! I overslept! I was supposed to be on the set a half an hour ago! I gotta get out of here!
Rachel: Oh, please, I don't care about you enough to bug me. In fact, from now on, I'm going take the high road. And I'm going be very very nice to you, you "momma's boy", starting right now.
PHOEBE: Um, is, is there any chance that you're rounding up? You know, like from, like 20?
Rachel: Yeah. Your teeth? Yes, I saw them from outside. (Sitting down on the couch.) You guys are never going to believe this. But, Phoebe made out with Ralph Lauren.
Phoebe: Okay. (on phone) Ooh, Im setting the phone down. (does so) But Im still here! Just dont go anywhere Im still here. (starts to put on the sweater) Dont-dont switch or anything, cause Im, Im right here. (She has pulled the sweater over her head, but her head is stuck in a sleeve.) Just one sec. One sec! One second!! (She is now frantically trying to get the sweater on, as Monica returns from the bathroom.) Wait! One second! Just
RACH: Oh my God. Oh my God Ross, no, hang up the phone, give me the phone Ross, give me the phone, give me the phone, give me the. . . [jumps the couch and lands on Ross's back, finally getting the phone from him. Ross has a confused expression on his face.]
[Phoebe walks from the living room to the kitchen and talks quietly to Rachel.]