words in movies
(Ross with his pants around his ankles tries to run, but Dr. Geller forgets that he has his pants around his ankles and falls down trying to flee.)
(Dr. Geller, the man with the Ph.D. in Paleontology, is trying to find a place to hide, but this supposedly intelligent man in the hands of clich�d scriptwriters runs around with his pants down around his ankles like one of the Three Stooges.)
The Museum Official: (on phone) Hi, this is Heldi from the Morgan Chase museum. Im calling for Monica Geller. I want to let her know that there was a cancellation and if shes still interested in having the Bing-Geller wedding at our facility, it is available (Chandler runs to answer the phone.)
The Museum Official: (on machine) Hi, this is Heldi from the Morgan Chase museum. Im calling for Monica Geller.
MRS. GELLER: Over here Jack. OK. I see, Rachel's coming up the path. Oh doesn't she look pretty. Jack, get this. [Rachel enters with a huge nose]
Monica: Go! I have it in my book. Go! (Rachel leaves and Monica calls Mrs. Green.) (To Phoebe) Wait a minute! If youre in charge of the invitations why am I the one who has to call herHello Mrs. Green! Hi, its Monica Geller.
Joey: Oh, little party favours, check it out! (Its a shirt that reads, "Ross Geller, Bachelor Bash 1998")
MRS. GELLER: It seems your daughter and Richard are something of an item.
Chandler: So, has anyone talked to Dr. and Mrs. Geller yet?
Mr. Geller: My joke wasnt funny.
[Enter Jack and Judy Geller]
Mrs. Geller: (less than pleased) Oh yes of course, hello Chandler.
Mr. Geller: Monica, all this food looks wonderful, you should think about doing this for a living.
Mr. Geller: (angry) No.
Chandler: Mr. and Mrs. Geller, you look wonderful, it is great to have you hear, let us take off your coats!
[Camera pans to the Geller family table. Ross, Rachel, Mr. and Mrs. Geller are there.]
Mr. Geller: Hi!
Mrs. Geller: Hello everybody!
Mr. Geller: What happened son?
Mrs. Geller: Oh, thank you Chandler! I just bought it.
Mr. Geller: Whats the matter with him?
Mrs. Geller: It was you?
Mr. Geller: (also lying) Ill help you dial.
Mr. and Mrs. Geller: What?!
Mrs. Geller: Ross, drugs? Divorced? Again?
Mr. Geller: Boy, Im glad I wore the big belt today.
Mrs. Geller: (lying) Ive gotta call my friend Mary and tell her how good this is, from Monicas room.
Ross: No, no-no, Ross Geller.
[Time lapse. The gang is sitting down for Thanksgiving dinner. Chandler is at the head of the table, Mr and Mrs Geller are to his right. Joey and Ross are to his left. Monica is serving things. Phoebe is in the living room and Rachel is at the sink.]
Elizabeth: Professor Geller?
Mr. Geller: (embarrassed) Judy, the kids..
The Professor: Dr. Geller, Kurt Rathman, Im a professor in the paleontology department here.
Mrs. Geller: (pointing to herself and Jack) Well we left ours in Monicas bedroom.
Rachel: (reading) 'Gone for more jars. Back later. Monica Geller.'
Mr. and Mrs. Geller: Yes. (They look at Chandler angrily.)
Elizabeth: Professor Geller?
MR. GELLER: There you go. So she dips into her savings, that's what it's there for. She's gonna be fine, and if you need a little extra, you know where to find it. [pulls a quarter from behind her ear]
Mrs. Geller: Do you know what it's like to grow up with someone who is critical of every single thing you say?
Elizabeth: You wanted to see me Professor Geller?
Rachel: Oh-oh Professor Geller.
Monica: Well Im Monica Geller, ball like a baby.
Mrs. Geller: Not that old crow, my mother. (They stop and she kisses Monica on the cheek.) Congratulations darling.
Mr. Geller: And we kinda figured about the porch swing.
Professor Feesen: Professor Geller!
[Scene: Mr. Geller's party. Mr. Geller and a friend are questioning Richard while Ross observes.]
MR. GELLER: Tell you what, maybe one of these weekends you can borrow the car and I cou. . .
Benjamin: Certainly. Dr. Geller, which 1965 Shirelles hit was later covered by a popular British invasion band?
Elizabeth: This is my father, Paul Stevens. Dad, this is Ross Geller.
"Whenever I get married, guess who wont get to sing? Somebody named Geller! And somebody else named Bing!"
Judge: And based on the fact that Mr. Geller is intravenous drug user.
Mr. Geller: I remember when we first got engaged.
Mr. Geller: (ignoring her) Well, Id gotten Judy pregnant. I still dont know that happened.
Mr. Geller: We have it. Only now, we call it the beach house.
Mr. Geller: It seemed like such a simple idea.
Mrs. Geller: You tell her Jack, I cant do it.
Mr. Geller: What?! They wanted a scary story!
[Scene: The Geller household kitchen, Monica and Phoebe are cooking for Mrs. Gellers party.]
Mrs. Geller: Stupid Jack, the word is stupid.
Ross: Im a professor here uh, Ross Geller.
Mr. Geller: And if you see Rita Moreno, let her know Im looking for her.
Mrs. Geller: She's upstairs. Monica! Come down! Everyone's here! Ross, Rachel, and the boy who hates Thanksgiving.
Mr. Geller: Ok, I have dandruff. Theres no need to laugh and point.
Mr. Geller: Which means you had seven years of beach fun and you cant put a price on that sweetie.
Chandler: Hey! I will have you know that... aah, who am I kidding. Let's call the kid Geller and let Bing die with me.
Monica: Anyway, Ross and I were always captains, and um, it got kindve competitive and one year, Geller Bowl VI, I accidentally broke Rosss nose.
Mr. Geller: Happy birthday, sweetie! Give us a hug! (Starts to get up.)
Mrs. Geller: Were sorry honey, but we just assumed if you got married after you turned 30 youd pay for it yourself.
Mr. Geller: Well, the white seems to be untouched. (He throws it back into the box as Mr. Geller moves a tarp and makes a discovery.) Uh-oh.
Mr. Geller: Im here!
Mr. Geller: Hi. God, it seems like just yesterday you guys used to come out to watch me work.
[Scene: Ross and Monicas parents garage, Ross and Monica are arriving to go through their things. Mr. Geller is in the garage.]
Mr. Geller: Im sorry we cant store your childhood things anymore.
Mr. Geller: So, I think youre boxes are over here. (They walk over to them.)
Mr. Geller: So its just your mother then.
Mr. Geller: Well, shell understand right? Its not like I did it on purpose.
Mr. Geller: Oh look, look theres your old makeup kit!
Mr. Geller: We started saving again when you were dating Richard and then that went to hell, so we redid the kitchen.
Mr. Geller: Really?
Mr. Geller: Sure!
Mr. Geller: Great!
Mr. Geller: (grabbing a glove) This couldve been hers!
Mr. Geller: Oh my God, does she really thinks that?
Mr. Geller: (overacting) Thats a good one! Do you hear that Ross? Three days!
Mr. Geller: Im afraid so.
Mr. Geller: (To Ross) Screw it! Im having one. (Takes out and lights a cigarette.)
Mr. Geller: Oh, yeah you loved that glove! You took it every place you went. You never went any place without that glove.
Mr. Geller: Its the key to my Porsche. Well, the key to your Porsche.
Mr. Geller: (entering) How are you honey?
Mrs. Geller: (To Chandler) Youve done a wonderful job with this party Chandler. Everything looks so lovely.
Mr. Geller: (To Monica) Why dont we take it for a spin?
Mr. Geller: Crap.
Mr. Geller: Its older than that. Ross was actually conceived right near this tuxedo.
Mr. Geller: Well, its time for a new family to start their memories here and hopefully their check will clear before they find the crack in the foundation and the asbestos in the ceiling.
Mrs. Geller: Oh-ho, I think its nice.
Mrs. Geller: Speech! Come on Monica!
Mr. Geller: You dont secretly smoke do you?
(Joey walks away and Mr. and Mrs. Geller walk up. Mr. Geller is wearing this ancient velvet tuxedo.)
Mrs. Geller: (shaking her hand) Its lovely to meet you.
Mr. Geller: No. Your mother really did the work. I was busy with the business. I wasn't around that much. Is that what this is about?
MR. GELLER: You're the twinkie?
Lewis: Professor Geller?
Mr. Geller: I always thought that too. Tell me, what does your father do?
Mrs. Geller: You could kick anyones ass you want too.
[Cut to Mr. and Mrs. Geller talking to Ross.]