words in movies
[Scene: The Hospital, Mr. and Mrs. Geller are there, along with Aunt Lillian. Ross and Monica enter and everyone says hi and kisses.)
Mrs. Geller: Me? I'm fine, fine. I'm glad you're here. ...What's with your hair?
Mrs. Geller: What's different?
Mrs. Geller: Oh, maybe that's it.
Mr. Geller: Not just restaurants, from our house.
Nurse: Mrs. Geller?
Mrs. Geller: What is going on?!
Mrs. Geller: What?
Mr. Geller: She may have died.
Mr. Geller: We're looking into it.
[Scene: Nana's house, Ross, Mrs. Geller and Aunt Lillian are going through clothes.]
Mrs. Geller: Well, that doesn't mean she can't look nice!
Mrs. Geller: Sweetie, you think you can get in there?
Mr. Geller: I was just thinking. When my time comes-
Mr. Geller: Listen to me! When my time comes, I wanna be buried at sea.
Mr. Geller: I wanna be buried at sea, it looks like fun.
Mr. Geller: C'mon, you'll make a day of it! You'll rent a boat, pack a lunch...
Mr. Geller: Everyone thinks they know me. Everyone says 'Jack Geller, so predictable'. Maybe after I'm gone, they'll say 'Buried at sea! Huh!'.
Mr. Geller: I'd like that.
Mrs. Geller: You're right. We'll go with the burgundy.
Mrs. Geller: That's really a day shoe.
Mrs. Geller: Mm. Unless we go with a different dress?
Mrs. Geller: Is everything all right, dear?
Mrs. Geller: It really was. Oh, c'mere, sweetheart. (Hugs her) Y'know, I think it might be time for you to start using night cream.
Mrs. Geller: Here, sweetie, here. I took these when I had my golfing accident. (Hands Ross a bottle of pills. Then turns to Monica and pats her hair over her ears)
Mr. Geller: Whaddya got there?
Mr. Geller: What's the score?
Mr. Geller: Beautiful! (Turns to watch with him)
Mrs. Geller: (to Monica) Your grandmother would have hated this.
Mrs. Geller: No, I'd be hearing about 'Why didn't I get the honey-glazed ham?', I didn't spend enough on flowers, and if I spent more she'd be saying 'Why are you wasting your money? I don't need flowers, I'm dead'.
Mrs. Geller: Do you know what it's like to grow up with someone who is critical of every single thing you say?
Mrs. Geller: I'm telling you, it's a wonder your mother turned out to be the positive, life-affirming person that she is.
Mrs. Geller: Tell her what?
Mrs. Geller: I'm not sure I know what you're getting at.
Mrs. Geller: ...No. I think some things are better left unsaid. I think it's nicer when people just get along.
Mrs. Geller: More wine, dear?
Mrs. Geller: (reaches out to fiddle with Monica's hair again, and realises) Those earrings look really lovely on you.
Mrs. Geller: Actually they were Nana's.
Mr. Geller: Now I'm depressed! ...(To everyone) Even more than I was.
MRS. GELLER: Ahh, are you hadsome.
Mrs. Geller: We really do feel bad about this though.
Mr. Geller: It is off. Right Ross? (pans over to see Ross with an afro and moustache)
Ross: Hi. Im Ross Geller. I live in the building.
Ross: (clinking a wine glass) Can I have everyones attention please? Im uh; Im Ross Geller.
Mr. Geller: Well, I used your boxes to divert water away from the Porsche.
Ross: Youve seen it, the Geller Yeller.
Mrs. Geller: Well, he better not come by here. He cant see the bride in the wedding dress.
Ross: I dont think you had an open mind about the name Ruth. I mean, come on, little Ruthie Geller, how-how cute is that?
Mr. Geller: Well, I dont know whats in the boxes down here, but I do know there are six or seven Easy Bake Ovens in the attic.
Ross: (on the phone) Hi, this is Ross Geller in suite 206. It seems you forgot a couple of things. Could you have some complimentary toiletries sent up to my room? (pause) Thank you! Ok. Toothbrush, toothpaste, razor, mouthwash, deodorant, dental floss, band aids, shaving cream, after shave... and I feel like I am forgetting something... Is there anything else you have that I haven't asked for already? (pause) Yeah, go ahead, send up some tampons.
Monica: Look. I'm sure there's some friendly way to reconcile this! Um, have a seat. First of all, we haven't been introduced, I'm Monica Geller.
Mrs. Geller: Jack?
Mr. Geller: Oh yeah, well who serves steak when theres no place to sit, I mean how are you supposed to eat this?
Mr. and Mrs. Geller: Hi
Mrs. Geller: (Looking around at the chapel.) Oh my God! Its like a fairyland.
Mr. Geller: Son, I had to shave my ears for tonight. You can do this.
Mrs. Geller: Thanks for going along with this.
Mrs. Geller: Oh, well Richard raved about the food at his party, of course you were sleeping with him. Then I heard the food at that lesbian wedding was very nice, I assume you werent sleeping with anybody there. Though, at least that would be something. (Leaves)
Mr. Geller: I just wish Nana were alive to hear Rosss toast.
Mrs. Geller: (crying) Oh Ross
Monica: (on phone) Hello? (Listens) Yeah, hi! Mrs. Tribbiani? (Listens) Hi, this is Monica Geller. (Listens) Yeah Im just calling to say that Chandler and I uh, really hope you can make it to the wedding. Yeah, apparently a bunch of invitations that we sent werent delivered. Umm, I guess there was some screw up at the damn post office! (Joey nods his approval.) (Listens) T-Tell me about it! (Listens) Yeah, yeah, the US Post Office? No, more like US lost office! (Listens) What are they Irish?! (Joey gives her a thumbs up.)
Mrs. Geller: Youre not going to say anything? On our 35th wedding anniversary
Mrs. Geller: Thank you Monica that was uh, interesting. Wasnt it interesting, Jack?
Mrs. Geller: Ross, why dont you give us your toast now?
[Scene: The Gym, Chandler and Mr. Geller are heading for the whirlpool room.]
Mrs. Geller: Oh hi dear!
Joey: All right. Uhh, okay. Our first contestant is Ross Geller. Why dont you tell us a little something about you Ross?
Cashier: Do you uh, want these things delivered Mr. and Mrs. Geller?
[Scene: The Hallway, Ross comes out and hugs Mrs. Geller.]
Mrs. Geller: (entering) Am I interrupting?
Mrs. Geller: Just hear me out!
Mrs. Geller: This is your grandmothers engagement ring, I want you to give it to Rachel.
Mrs. Geller: I actually needed to talk to you before the birth.
Mr. Geller: She went to pick up Aunt Liddy.
(Mrs. Geller leaves as Ross re-enters the room.)
Mr. Geller: So when do I get to meet Emma and show her this? (Pulls a bouquet of flowers out of his sleeve.)
Monica: Hi! Umm, Im Monica Geller, Im the chef at Alessandros.
Mrs. Geller: Just think about it. If you dont, Ill talk more about humping.
Mr. Geller: Wheres my granddaughter? Ive been practicing my magic tricks.
Monica: (entering with everyone else including Mr. Geller) Hi! Hey look whos here!
Ross: (noticing something) Actually umm (He turns Mr. Gellers head to look at Emma.)
Mr. Geller: Youre right, youre right. This is about your positions. Now, what I saw in the closet is not the optimum position for conceiving a child, although it might feel good.
Mr. Geller: Come on!
Mr. Geller: What?
Mr. Geller: Whoa-whoa-whoa! I dont think so! Arent you ovulating?
Mr. Geller: Of course. Ill always be your dad.
Mr. Geller: Oh my God! This is so exciting! Well, get back in there! (Points to the closet) Ill guard the door!
Mr. Geller: I think there are people in there having sex.
Mr. Geller: Oh, I dont think that. Before today I never thought of you two having sex at all. It was a simpler time.
Mr. Geller: This one time I had my knee up on the sink and your mother, she was
Mr. Geller: But pleasure is important, (To Chandler) and it helps if the woman has an orgasm. You up to the task sailor?
Ross: Oh Ross Geller
[Scene: Rachels Room, Joey moves Rosss coat to get the tissues Rachel wants and the engagement ring box Mrs. Geller gave him falls out of the pocket it was inside. Joey goes to one knee, picks up the box, opens it, and sees that its an engagement ring.]
[Scene: Ms. Geller, Rachel and Ross storm into the apartment.]
Mr. Geller: Have a seat son. (You can see Mr. Geller sitting closer to the door as Chandler walks over and sits in his lap.) Hey!! (Chandler quickly jumps off and sits next to him with a shocked expression on his face.)
Mrs. Geller: Can we talk to you for just a yknow Its just a little thing. Well we think its absolutely marvelous that youre having this baby out of wedlock, some of our friends are less open-minded. Which is why weve told them all that youre married.
Chandler: This is okay. Were all adults here; theres nothing to be ashamed of. Now, lets put our underwear in our pockets and walk out the door. (They do so and find Mr. Geller leaning against a wall stunned.)
Mr. Geller: (Pointing items out on the bill.) Flowers, liquor, recarpet first floor. New guest bath, landscaping. Im paying to remodel this guys house. (Angrily gets up.) Im going to give that son on a bitch, a piece of my mind.
Rachel: (from bedroom) Oh, damn you Geller!
Paleontologist: (merrily) Ok Geller. Last day of the conference, you know what happens to the keynote speaker.
Ross: Hi, hi, I'm Ross Geller.
Ross: Dad dad, please! As I was saying umm, Im Dr. Ross Geller. Uhh, and Im the best man. And uh, this marriage is doubly special for me umm, because not only is the groom my best friend but uh, the bride is my little sister. And, shes the greatest sister a guy could ask for. So if youd all please join me in raising a glass to the, the couple were here to celebrate. (Everyone does so.) To the Bings.
Professor Spafford: Professor Geller?
Ross: "... Sarah. I dig you", Uh? "Doctor Ross Geller".
Woman: Doctor Geller, I'm such a huge fan!
MR. GELLER: You know, that Steffi Graf has quite a tush. I'm just saying, it's right there.
Charlie: Ooh... Dr. Geller!
Charlie: Yeah, sounds like a good idea... Dr. Geller!
Phoebe: Yeah, I dreamt that he saved me from a burning building and he was so brave and so strong! And its making me look at him totally differently. Yknow, I mean he used to be just, yknow Jack Geller Monica and Rosss dad and now hes hes Jack Geller, dream hunk."
Mr. Geller: Are you kidding me, I could stay and look at her forever.
Joey: Hey Mr. and Mrs. Geller! Let me help you with that.
Benjamin: Certainly. Very well. And Dr. Geller, when is my birthday?
Benjamin: Dr. Geller...? Charlie... What are you... what are you doing here?
Mr. Geller: (shaking her hand) So are you his mother or his father?
Mrs. Geller: (whispers to Jack a little loudly) I think hes stoned again.
Rachel: You're fly is open, Geller!
Mr. Geller: Look at her, my first grandchild.
Monica: Ok. Hold on. (her mobile phone rings) Geller here! No! I said it has to be there by 4 o'clock. Goodbye. (she hangs up) Oh, how hard it is to make an ice sculpture?
Dr. Green: What are you doing here, Geller?
Mrs. Geller: Oh honey, come on, have a sense of humour, youve never been able to laugh at yourself.
Ross: And I'm Doctor Ross Geller.
Mrs. Geller: Chandler! Youve been Rosss best friend all these years, stuck by him during the drug problems. (Ross gets disgusted.) And now youve taken on Monica as well. Well, I dont know what to say. Youre a wonderful human being.
MR. GELLER: C'mon Rich, it's my birthday, let me live vicariously.
Ross: (recovers his composure and starts typing) Respectfully, professor R. Geller. (hits <return>, closes the laptop and joins Charlie on the sofa) Hey!
Mr. Geller: Sweetheart, we love you just as much as Ross! Now, Im sorry about everything that happened and Id probably never be able to make it up to you, but heres a start. (He hands her a small box.)
Ross: Okay. Okay. (To the nurse behind the desk.) Umm hi, this is Rachel Green. Im Ross Geller. We-we called from the car.
Mr. Geller: Worse than when he broke up with Barbara.
Mr. Geller: Your make-up kit? Id feel better.
Mrs. Geller: (holding two pies) Monica, why don't you finish off these pies? I don't have any more room left in the fridge.
Rachel: (looking out the window) What's with the rain, Geller? I mean, when I signed up for Dino Week, nobody said anything about it being monsoon season.
Mrs. Geller: Oh, we're having spaghetti! That's.... easy.
Charlie: I'm sorry... (introduces them to each other) Ross Geller... Benjamin Hobart.
Monica: (On phone) Hi, Nancy. Hi, it's Monica Geller. I'm good. Listen, I'm looking for a job in Tulsa. Well yeah, my husband has been relocated...Because I love him! No, I don't want a job in New York. Javo (sp?) is looking? Oh my God! He asked for me personally? Oh my God! Oh, wow, this is really flattering, but I'm moving to Tulsa. Yeah, so if you would tell Javo (sp?) 'I'll take it!'
Ross: Good evening, sir. My name is Ross Geller. I'm one of the people who applied for the apartment. And I-I realize that the competition is fierce butI'm sorry. I, I can't help but notice you're naked and (He claps his hands.) I applaud you. Man, I wish I was naked. I mean, this-this looks so great. That is how God intended it.
Sherman Whitfield: Dr. Geller, Sherman Whitfield, London Institute.
[Joey, Phoebe, and Rachel are sitting at the table, looking at the Geller siblings like theyre weirdos.]
(Ross with his pants around his ankles tries to run, but Dr. Geller forgets that he has his pants around his ankles and falls down trying to flee.)
MR. GELLER: Ahh, what's a little mid-life crisis between friends?
Mr. Geller: Noted.