words in movies
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Rachel has just gotten home and is going through the mail. She finds something that's Monica's and goes over and knocks on her closed bedroom door.]
Rachel: Y'know what, just give me a second and I'll be out of your hair. I'm just gonna grab a jacket. When I get back, I want every little detail. (There's a knock on the door.) Maybe that's him. (Goes to answer the door.)
All: (subdued) Yay! (He motions for them to keep quiet, including Chandler who is still holding the lamp Ross handed him, before he goes off to talk to Emily in private.)
[Scene: Ross's apartment, Ross is prying at the Magic 8 Ball with a screwdriver as there's a knock on his door which he goes to answer.]
Ross: (answering the phone.) Hello. (Listens) Hi sweetie. (Listens.) Good. Look umm, yes I've been thinking about that thing that you wanted me to do and, I can do it. (Rachel gives him a thumbs up.) So will you come to New York? (Rachel wants to know what she said, and he gives her a thumbs up and she goes over and hugs him. All the time not knowing what's going on.)
(Goes over to Chandler.)
Monica: Wow! Play that message for Emily and this whole problem goes away!
Joey: I know it sounds crazy, but Chandler this is (Goes and picks up the sandwich) the greatest sandwich in the world!
Ross: Y'know, it-it doesn't matter. The important thing is that you're here. You're my friend, and you're here. Oh! (He goes over and hugs her.)
Rachel: Umm, listen, I'm gonna need to take a rain check, my roommate is just really sick. Okay? Bye! (She goes back in to talk to Ross.) Honey, listen, I know, I know things seem so bad right now.
Monica: Joey, I left my watch on the counter last night. (Goes to the counter) It was right here, where is it?
Rachel: Well, actually Gunther sent me. Youre not allowed to have cups out here, its a thing. (takes her cup and goes back inside)
(Rachel goes to hug him but Ross is holding one of her hands and doesnt let go, so she can only put one arm around him.)
(Rachel goes into the bathroom as the guys continue throwing the ball.)
Chandler: Hm-hmm. (Goes to take another bite.)
Chandler: Phoebe if it helps Alexandra has only been massaging Monica for like three years. (Phoebe rolls her eyes and walks away and Monica glares at him.) If! I said, "If it helps!" (Goes to the bedroom.)
Joey: Chandler... hey... (he goes towards his room but he stops near Emma's cot) Rach... what's Hugsy doin' in the crib with Emma? (he looks puzzled)
Ross: Look, no-no, hey, hey, don't worry about it! In nine years, she and I will be right there. (Goes and sits on the couch dejectedly.)
Phoebe: (smiles) Okay! (Goes to answer the phone.)
Joey: Oh yeah! For every dollar Shutter Speed makes, one penny of it goes right in Joey's pocket.
Chandler: Okay. (He gets up and goes to find her.)
(Chandler goes to his bedroom and opens the door. However, only the top half opens, and he trips into his bedroom over the bottom half.)
(She goes one way; he goes the other. The camera pans back to Chandler and Monica, and needless to say, they're standing there dumbstruck.)
Rachel: Okay! (She goes and gets her surprise and when she returns with it, Ross stares in shock.) Check it out!
Rachel: Thank you. (He goes to leave.) Hey-hey umm, uh, is there, is there any such thing as an annulment shower?
Mrs. Bing: Alright, well, be good, I love you. (Kisses him and goes to leave)
Rachel: I didnt! Even when I found out umm, all right, well let's just say I found something out something about someone and let's just say she's gonna keep it. (Goes into her room.)
JANITOR: Of course they're gonna say he's dead. They don't want the bad publicity. It's all a great big cover-up. Do you have any idea how high up this thing goes?
Ross: Fine, youre right. Lets ah, lets take a break, (goes to the door) lets cool off, okay, lets get some frozen yoghurt, or something.. (opens the door)
(Joey goes back into the apartment, runs back into the hallway, throws his shoulder against the door, and knocks it down off its hinges.)
(Joey walks out, while Rachel is pensive. Once he's out of her room, he suddenly realizes who she was talking about and goes back in. He looks at her in disbelief and she looks like she was caught red-handed)
Monica: All right, sorry. (Goes back to Rachels room.)
Ross: (taking the flyer) Apparently Phoebes mother also goes by the name Julio.
(Monica goes into Rachels room.)
(Joey laughs nervously and goes to his bedroom.)
[Monica goes to fiddle with something on the table.]
[Ross goes to look in the magazine Rachel got her recipe from.]
ROSS: Well, there goes my whole belief system.
(Tims beeper goes off and he answers it.)
Rachel: Ohh, I love Joey! Joey lives with a duck! (Goes and hugs Joey.)
Rachel: (goes over and hits her head on the post) Look at that! (repeats) Look at that! (repeats) We all do it. (repeats) Okay, Im stopping now.
Phoebe: Oh wait, one sec. One sec. (Goes to the mirror) Hey you! Behind the glass! Who are you looking at! I've always wanted to say that when I was in one of these rooms, (sees the look on his face) which was never!
Rachel: (with the sticks in her hands) Um... (She goes to the tarantula-cage and puts the sticks into it) Done!
Joey: Good evening. Im Mr. Tribbiani. And I will be teaching acting for soap operas. Now um, on my first day as (proudly) Dr. Drake Remoray on Days of Our Lives, (looks for a reaction from his students, and gets none.) I learned that one of the most important things in soap opera acting is reacting, this does not mean acting again, it means, you dont have a line, but someone else just did. And it goes like this. (looks all intense for a moment and then gasps, the students cheer him) Thanks, thanks, a lot. Oh, by the way, before I forget to work in soap operas some of you will have to become much more attractive. All right, moving right along.
Ross: Well, Im not going to go now anyway (he goes to sit down).
Rachel: It's not here Pheebs, it's not here. Ohh, I went to Joey and Chandler's last night! Okay! (Goes to the door.)
Jill: Oh great! (Goes to get it as the phone rings.)
Rachel: What the... DIAL IT DOWN! (Joey goes to sit on the bed) Listen, ok, and maybe they're crazy thoughts, but sometimes I do, I have, I've been thinking about... you know, us! (looks at Joey, who's totally distraught) Ok, dial it up a little!
(Ross stands next to him for a second, then goes and watches the movie.)
(He hesitates, then goes over to dance with her.)
(She goes out into the hall and when shes there and the door is closed; she rips off her robe to reveal her work clothes.)
Chandler: Oh. (Goes and gets Phoebes book as Rachel comes in from her room.)
(She picks up a charred piece of plastic that once was the Foster puppets, and starts to break down. Monica goes over and comforts her.)
(Goes to the bathroom and Chandler turns on the TV and finds a high-speed police chase.)
Chandler: Look, you have to help me! Okay? I mean, I know what to do with a woman, yknow, I know where everything goes, its always nice. But I need to know what makes it go from nice to, "My God! Somebodys killing her in there!"
(Ross points out Rachel to Chandler and goes over to talk to her. Rachel is checking out her nose in her compact mirror.)
Joey: Actually, tomorrow night kinda depends on how tonight goes.
Paul: Ill be right back. (He goes to get the ice.)
[Phoebe gets up and goes into Rachels old room, a smile on her face.]
Paul: Joey! (Goes over and hugs Joey and picks him off of his feet.)
Joey: I-I think everybodys pretending they dont hear you. Anyway, look, I dont know about you and your jackets and your separate tables, but Ross is one of my best friends, and if I save him a seat, Im telling you, he will sit in it! (Ross enters and goes over to the white table) Ross! Ross! Over here, man! I-I saved you seat.
(She goes to close the door, but Chandler puts his foot it in.)
(Monica goes into her room.)
(She goes into the bathroom.)
Chandler: (goes to hug him and stops short) HeyyyyWhat?
Phoebe: Hi. Listen, Im sorry about that whole thing with Roger. It really wasnt right, and I, and I want to make it up to you, so umm, I brought you something that I think youll really enjoy. (Goes into the hallway and returns carrying the Evander Holyfield cutout.) Now, this is just a loan. Okay? Im gonna, Im gonna want him back. So (Looks at him longingly) Im gonna go now. (Exits.) (Pause) (Entering) Im sorry, I thought I could do it and I cant! (She grabs the cutout and exits for good.)
Monica: Fine! Judge all you want to but, (points to Ross) married a lesbian, (points to Rachel) left a man at the altar, (points to Phoebe) fell in love with a gay ice dancer, (points to Joey) threw a girls wooden leg in a fire, (points to Chandler) livin in a box!! (goes to her room)
[Rachel closes the drapes over the window, goes into her bedroom and closes the door.]
Chandler: Oh-ho, come here. (goes and hugs her) Listen, you are one of my favourite people and the most beautiful woman Ive ever known in real life.
Chandler: Yeah, right here in my pocket. (Pats his pocket. Phoebe smiles, goes over to hug him, and removes the ring from his pocket.) Pheebs?
Phoebe: If you wouldve let me finish, it goes on to say that hes probably not gay.
[Scene: Monica and Phoebe's, Monica, Chandler, and Phoebe are there. Phoebes cell phone rings and she goes through her little routine of lighting a cigarette before answering the phone.]
Joey: Wow thanks! (He goes into his bedroom and closes the door.)
(Theres a knock on the door. The gang is stunned and Phoebe counts to make sure that everyone is there. Out of curiosity Chandler goes and answers the door.)
Chandler: The ball is Janice. The ball is Janice. (goes to kick the ball but kicks Rosss foot instead.)
Joey: You got it! And the rabbis beard, 100% horsehair. Nice catch C.H.E.E.S.E.! (Pauses as he waits for C.H.E.E.S.E.s next line.) Its your line C.H.E.E.S.E.! (Suddenly C.H.E.E.S.E. goes crazy and starts flinging its arms and advancing on Joey behind the desk.) Wayne! Wayne!!
Phoebe: Well, we were um, sorta invited to go skiing, y'know Rachels sisters cabin. (Chandler goes back to the window to smoke again.)
Rachel: Okay, go to the left. (Joey goes starboard or sits on the right side of the boat.) The left!
Monica: No-no, I-I really dont want to talk about it! I dont! (To Rachel) Especially with you. (Goes into her room.)
Rachel: Yeah, this is Tag. Tag, this is Phoebe. Phoebe, can I see you for a second? (Goes into office.)
Phoebe: Okay. (She goes to get ready.)
Chandler: Okay. (Goes back to bed.)
<Amy pushes Rachel and Monica goes berserk and runs around the table>
Joey: Okay. Yeah. (She leaves and he goes to pick up a box marked books, but decides to take the box marked pillows instead.) Yeah, Ill grab this one. (He follows her upstairs.)
Monica: I know!! (calls him) (on phone) Chip? Hi! Its Monica. (listens) Kay. (listens) Kay. (listens) Okay. (listens) Okay, good-bye. (hangs up) Oh my God, we just had the best conversation!! (goes into her room as Rachel enters)
Monica: Oh my god! Did you hear that? She said Monica! (She goes back to Clunkers again) Oooh, I can't leave her!
Rachel: Well that too. (Joey goes into his room.) Joey?
Ross: Okay. (goes over to the counter) (to Chandler) What ah, what is the matter with you? Whats going on?
(The crowd goes wild, and Ross is the only one boo-ing him.)
Phoebe: Thank you. (To the other woman) No? (She nods.) All right. (She goes to another pairing.) Oh, its so nice to see you.
Joey: After she gave me that big speech?! She goes and makes a date with a guy on the same night she has plans with me? I think shes trying to pull a fast one on Big Daddy!
(Rachel goes to the fridge, opens it, and blows on the whistle Monica gave her at the store, which causes Phoebe and Monica to turn around and look at her.)
Ross: Well, what is she goes down and-and sleeps with a bunch of guys?
Steve: Tartlets. Tartlets. Tartlets. The word has lost all meaning. (he gets up and goes into the kitchen)
Ross: What? (Glances over and sees the faces of the rest of the group, then goes and sits down.)
Monica: Ohh, sweetie! (Goes to comfort her.) Hey, I bet you anything that hes gonna call you again.
(The phone rings and Monica answers it as Rachel goes into the bathroom.)
Ross: She wants me to take responsibility for everything that went wrong in our relationship. I mean she goes on for five pages about, about how I was unfaithful to her! (Both Joey and Chandler shrug their shoulders as to say Well...) (yelling) WE WERE ON A BREAK!!!!!
JOEY: Aww, Rach, I think you look cute (kisses her on the cheek, then looks at Ross) And you, uh, you, you I could eat with a spoon (goes to kiss him).
Joey: (annoyed) I dont know! (Goes back to looking through the pipe.) (Pause) Yeah, I do.
Rachel: (takes off her robe) Oh! Look what happened! {Don't get your hopes up guys, we only get to see her from the back or from the neck up. Its times like these I wish that the networks would broadcast some nudity other than Denis Franz's butt.} (In her head.) Huh, check me out! I'm in my kitchen naked! I'm picking up an orange. (Does so) I'm naked! (Goes into the living room) Lighting the candles, naked, and carefully. (She backs anything that might have a point like a candle on her body away.)
Phoebe: (goes over to his desk) Earl! Im Phoebe.
Monica: Oh, is that why you did it the secret hallway where nobody ever goes?!
RACHEL: (after a pause with everyone staring at her, she goes up to the microphone) Ya, know what Barr, I'm not gonna leave. I probably should, but I'm not, see 'cause I promised myself that I would make it through at least *one* of your weddings (da-doom-chesh). See now, tonight, all I really wanted was to make it though this evening with a little bit of grace and dignity. Well (laughing), I guess we can all agree that's not gonna happen. There's nothing really left to say except....(starts singing) "Her name was Lola. She was a showgirl. With yellow feathers (band joins in), feathers in her hair, and a dress cut down to there. She would..."
MRS. GELLER: Oh, Jack look, there's that house paint commercial that cracks you up. [the Gellers return to watching TV and Ross goes over to Monica]