words in movies
[Scene: Ross's apartment, Die Hard has ended, only I dont think Joey and Ross know that yet. As you see, they are both asleep. And theyre on the same couch. Which means theyre sleeping together. Not like Joey is at one end and Ross is on the other, they both happen to be lying down and sleeping together. Well, there hasnt been any clothes removed so not that kind of sleeping together. Not that theres anything wrong with that. That is unless youre a Republican in which that kind of thing will bring about the downfall of Western society, especially if they should happen to want to get married. Anyway, let me recap. No, there is too much, let me sum up. Ross and Joey are taking a nap together on top of each other and both wake-up at the same time, realize what they just did, scream, and jump up.]
[Scene: Monica, Chandler, and Phoebe's, Monica has just gotten back from brunch and is telling Chandler about it.]
(Joey notices Monica has gotten a pie.)
Phoebe: Sting has a son that goes there too!
Rachel: Honey, why dont you sit down? Dina has something that she wants to tell you.
[Scene: Rachels Office, Joey has brought Dina to meet with Rachel.]
Mike: All right, stop! You know, all Phoebe has done tonight is trying to get you to like her. And maybe that hasn't been clear all the time, but she did her best. And yeah... She's a little different than you are...
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Will has left and the rest of the gang is watching Joey finish the turkey.]
Rachel: Really?! So this has happened to you?
Ross: So do we!! So do we!! (Ross notices a couple has been staring at them.) Im sorry you had to see that.
Chandler: Oh uh, as it turns out, we cant do it. Monica has to work.
[Scene: The Cooking Class, everyone has finished baking a batch of cookies and the teacher is going around tasting them.]
Rachel: has your girlfriend got the butt?
Phoebe: (sitting down next to Ross) Yknow she has a face Ross!
Chandler: Well apparently Albert has no friends. He's very excited about the bachelor party though. I think actually the only reason he's getting married is so he can see a stripper.
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's erm, Monica and Rachels, Monica has finally given up on her search to find what the light switch does and is now flicking it on and off aimlessly.]
Phoebe: Oh, it has a name?
Monica: Well umm, Alexandra has been
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, the bachelor party has ended and Monica is trying to explain herself to Chandler.]
Rachel: (startled) Ahh, hi! Hi! Melissa, whats up? Im just uh, about to umm, go out to the store to get some stuff to put in my backpack. Yknow, like dried fruit and granola and stuff. Whats up? (She has put on the backpack.)
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Monica has opened another wedding present as Chandler enters.]
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Chandler has a box of keys and is trying them on the secret closet when someone enters.]
Chandler: There has got to be a way!
(The dog returns with a ball that looks exactly like the same one Joey has.)
Chandler: No, no resentment, believe me, it's worth it. 'Kay? Y'know in a relationship you have these key moments that you know you'll remember for the rest of your life? Well, every- single- second is like that with Aurora.. and I've just wasted about thirty-five of them talking to you people, so, uh.. Monica, can you help me with the door? (He has armloads of stuff.)
Rachel: All right, easy mimey, the moment has passed, it aint gonna happen!
Emily: and that was all before 10 oclock. The caterer rang and said it was going to be Chicken Kiev instead of Chicken Tarragon. And then the florist phoned to say there arent any tulips. Oh, and the chilliest has carpel-tunel syndrome. Were not gonna be
Chandler: Okay Ross has the cameras, has he checked out yet?
Monica: How long has it been this time?
Ross: Hey, whatever it is, I am sure it has happened to me. Yknow, actually onceonce I got dumped during sex.
Phoebe: He has brown hair.
Mona: Oh, my God! She has food delivered here?
Paul: Ross, look, I know Ive been giving you a lot of jabs and its partly because Im very protective of Lizzie, and partly because well, they just keep coming to me. But I have to admit that after all the wonderful things that Lizzie has told me and the many, many, (pause) many stories that Rachel has told me that, well (pause) youre not (pause) all bad.
Ross: (entering) Hey! Has anyone seen my shirt? Its a button down, like a, like a faded salmon?
Joey: I guess I'm going to have to come up with a really good reason why I wasn't there. The producers are going to be so mad at me. They sat us all down yesterday and said "Everyone has to be there at 6:00 AM sharp, that means you Tribbiani." Like.. like I was some kind of idiot.
Monica: Emily has probably been planning it since she was five! Ever since the first time she took a pillowcase and hung it off the back of her head. Thats what we did! We dreamed about the perfect wedding, and the perfect place, with the perfect four-tiered wedding cake (Starting to cry), with the little people on top. (Ross gets thrown a box of Kleenex from the bathroom and he gives her one.) Thanks. But the most important part is that we had the perfect guy who understood just how important all that other stuff was.
Rachel: Okay, Ross, it has to be realistic.
Rachel: Yeah, no. Ross has a PhD.
Phoebe: But it's just so unfair that our date has to get cut short just 'cause some guy shot at a store clerk.
Rachel: Look I know she's a little tough to take. She has no where else to go, and she's my sister. Alright, she's Emma's aunt. And I would like them to bond.
Host: Folks, has this ever happened to you. You go to the refrigerator to get a nice glass of milk, (Joey is in the background struggling to open a cartoon of milk) and these darn cartons are so flingin'-flangin' hard to open.
Ross: Please, help me! I have a date tonight. It has to go well okayIm scared for my health!
Ross: The wheel has not been my friend tonight Joey. Uh, Ill take another question.
Joey: Correct! Which monarch has ruled Great Britain the longest?
[Time Lapse, dinner has ended for everyone except Joey who looks like to have finished the turkey, until he turns the plate around and reveals he only ate one side.]
Woman: (to her friend) He has the most amazing Porsche under there!
Phoebe: Well, I can't give you a massage, because my licence has been revoked again!
Rachel: She has the drugs!
Monica: Now stop it! Double or nothing that she has it by tomorrow!
[Scene: A Portrait Studio, Chandler and Monica are trying to take their engagement picture. Monica has a beautiful smile, while Chandler isnt.]
Monica: You know everything!! Oh wait, double or nothing. I bet you the baby is over seven pounds. (Phoebe isnt interested.) I bet you it has hair. (Shes still not interested.) I bet you its a girl.
(They stop when they see Ross who has to struggle to get out of the bed.)
Rachel: No Ross! Ross! Ross! My child has no father!
Ross first has a look of 'huh' then changes it to sarcastic happy: Thank you Amy.
Chandler: But nothing has to happen until your ready.
Chandler: Okay and he hasnt proposed yet because she has no ring on her finger.
Monica: How cool is this?! We know three down! Im touching three down! (She has her hand on his shoulder.)
Rachel: Oh my God! How long has she been crying?
(They both go back into their old rooms and shut the doors. Of course, Chandler has to close both sections of his door.)
Rachel: (talking on the phone) C'mon Daddy, listen to me! All of my life, everyone has always told me, 'You're a shoe! You're a shoe, you're a shoe, you're a shoe!'. And today I just stopped and I said, 'What if I don't wanna be a shoe? What if I wanna be a- a purse, y'know? Or a- or a hat! No, I don't want you to buy me a hat, I'm saying that I am a ha- It's a metaphor, Daddy!
Monica: Why not?! I mean this has been the most amazing week. Would it be so terrible? Even if we were friends who lived together. Or, maybe someday friends who stood up in front of their other friends, and vowed to be friends forever.
Monica: That's the nicest anyone has ever said to me!
Monica: Hey. Okay, I gave him another chance, but Tim has got to go!
Joey raises his hand: Uh.. who has to die for me to get her?
Monica:: yeah he has to stay in Tulsa this weekend
Ross: Yeah and we'd want to make sure Emma has someone like Monica who is more uh. uh discliplinarin.. someone who can be firm and strict.
[Cut to Phoebes room, Phoebe has put her helmet on one of her teddy bears and is playing around with it. Ross knocks and pokes his head in the door.]
(Steve goes over to look at Ross who's trying to look cool, but has some frosting on his lip.)
Roy: No, no, you're right. Who am I kidding? I should have hung up that breakaway jockstrap years ago. What am I gonna do? I mean, this has been my life for thirty two years. Taking my clothes off in front of people is all I know.
Rachel: Oh no no no no no, Gavin can't, he already has plans, most likely with his mother.
(Chandler acts disgusted, but is happy that Joey has stopped snoring. However, just as he is about to leave, Joey starts snoring again. So to get him to stop, he slams the door shut, waking Joey.)
Joey: (Realizes that he has forgotten all about the double date) Oh my God!
Joey: I know, right? (Chandler has really big eyes, and nods) Wh... Wh... Why are we doing this?
ROSS: Shouldn't the pizza be here by now?� I mean, they said thirty minutes or less.� Well, how long has it been?
[Scene: Ross and Rachel's apartment.� Three pizza crusts, two bottle caps and the plastic tripod are left in the otherwise empty pizza box.� Mike is making hollow popping noises with his mouth.� He begins to speak, but stops and pops his lips a few more times and takes a drink.� Ross smiles as if he has thought of something to say, but then he stops and sinks back in a slump on the sofa.]
Waiter: You can�t order until your entire party has arrived. Restaurant policy.
(She gets to Monica who has the dress balled up in one hand and is sitting on Megan who is sprawled out on the floor.)
<they hug and Rachel has this disgusted look on her face and then Emma starts crying>
Joey: (taking the baby) She looks so real! (The gang looks at him.) Yknow what I mean! Shes this whole tiny little person. She already has eyelashes and knees and uh-oh.
Ross: (getting up) Tell me about it. (He sits up on the edge of the bed and has "Just Married" written on his back.)
Phoebe: Well, if you must know I have written 14 books. And as I am the only one who has read them, I can tell you that they all have been very well received.
The Teacher: Excellent! What Rachel has shrewdly observed here
Chandler: Look, weve always talked about having babies someday. Im not saying it has to be right now, but Im starting to think that we can handle it. Were good. Were really good.
Monica: Go! I have it in my book. Go! (Rachel leaves and Monica calls Mrs. Green.) (To Phoebe) Wait a minute! If youre in charge of the invitations why am I the one who has to call herHello Mrs. Green! Hi, its Monica Geller.
[Scene: Central Perk, Phoebe, Chandler, and Joey are there as Monica enters with the local paper that has the engagement picture in it.]
Joey: No, no, Emma has one Hugsy, the new Hugsy, huh? The other Hugsy, I don't know, I guess I'll just take it back.
[Scene: The Restaurant, dinner has ended and Phoebe and Rachel are talking. Dr. Green is not at the table.]
Monica:: he has to work, there's some rush on the big (pause, thinks) ah damn it one of these days I'm really gonna have to start listening when he talks about his job.
Rachel: Hello. (to Gavin) But you know what, hey, new day, new leaf, I am just really really happy ... (sees Gavin staring at Heather) I'm sorry, obviously Heather's ass has something more important to say so I'll just wait 'till it's finished.
Joey: (sounding panicky)Oh my god Ross! You don't have Emma! And Rachel you don't have Emma! (Starts yelling) Where's Emma? Who has Emma!?
Ross: Oh-oh, wait, my mother is gonna be here any minute. And she has the keys.
Chandler: You're right, it has been you dream for over 15 seconds.
Phoebe: Yeah! It really has been great too, you know, some of this people must have seen me play before because they were requesting a bunch of my songs! Yeah, "You suck" and "shut up and go home".
[Scene: Mr. Zelner's office, Rachel has come back again to try and do that second interview.]
Chandler: Phoebe, did you see that?! He totally checked you out! He is so cute! (Looking at his tea.) Mine has a picture of The Village People, what does that mean?
[Time Lapse: the crowd has left and only Mona, Monica, Joey, and Phoebe are still watching to see who will be able to move the others arm first. An event that has yet to happen.]
(The sitcom begins with its familiar refrain, yet with a Latin lilt. Rachel and Monica do a little dance with their chopsticks, and Phoebe has to grin as Ross joins in the rhythm.)
Chandler: Why dont you use ours across the hall, cause she has problems.
Joey: Are you kidding? Rachel loves to shop! And she has great taste! Yeah, she's the one who taught me, you don't wear white after labour day and that you always, always, always have to put on underwear when you're trying on clothes.
Receptionist: This has been torn up.
Chandler: No. But uh, Joey has, and I usually talk to them in the morning time.
Mike: Sorry David, but she really has to know this.