words in movies
Phoebe: Why, I must have been in missile training the day they taught that.
Chandler: (to Rachel) You know what I just realized? We have no idea what we're doing in the wedding tomorrow.
Ross: Yeah, I thought we'd be groomsmen, but wouldn't they have asked us by now? When did they ask you to be their bridesmaid?
Phoebe: I don't have a fax machine.
Chandler: Mike didn't tell you? You have to chose one of us to be in your wedding. One of his groomsmen fell out.
Phoebe: Oh, I don't wanna choose! It's (Rachel is walking by). Oh okay, wait. Rach! Listen I have a very special bridesmaid task for you today.
Phoebe: Well, there's a spot open for only one groomsman and you have to choose between Ross and Chandler. So good luck with that.
Phoebe: All right, I guess I'll have to find a new bridesmaid.
Mike: Do I have a minute to go to the bathroom?
Monica: (very serious) It's 2101 and I am not amused. (pause). Ok, the bride and groom have a few words they'd like to say. (Everyone sits and Phoebe gets up)
Phoebe: Ok. Hello everyone and thank you all for being here tonight. So tomorrow's the big event and some of you might not know, but Mike and I didn't get off to the best start. (she reads a note). My friend Joey and I decided to fix each other up with friends so I, I... (Monica is twirling her hands in order to make Phoebe speed up her speech) oh I... hum... I gave it a lot of thought and I fixed him up with my friend Mary Ellen who couldn't be here tonight because... (Monica is tapping her watch with her finger) it's not important... she is in rehab. Anyway, so, ok, Joey said that he was fixing me up with his friend Mike, only he didn't have a friend Mike so he just brought, uhm, my Mike and, and (Monica clears her throat) but despite, you know... it got... it got good. Ok, I wanna take a moment to mention my mother, who couldn't be here...
Rachel: Ok-dokey, Joey, listen. This is gonna be bridesmaid central, all right? We're gonna have hair and make-up going on in the bathroom and oh, I had to move a couple of things in the fridge to make room for the corsages.
Joey: Oh, man! I wouldn't have had breakfast if I knew there was going to be corsages!
Monica: Uh-huh, but I'm sure you can handle this. I mean, I have won awards for my organizational skills, but, uh, I'm sure you'll do fine.
Ross: I have to talk to her about this groomsman situation, ok? I'm not gonna watch Chandler up there while I'm sitting in the seats like some chump! (he goes to Rachel's room, knocks the door and enters the room). (very fake gasp) Oh! My God! You're breathtaking!
Ross: You haven't by any chance chosen a groomsman yet, have you?
Joey: May I have a word with you, please?
Joey: Have a seat. (Mike sits on his bed, and Joey towers over him. He starts talking in an Italian godfather-type voice) Last night, I tried to welcome you into my family... and instead, you disrespect me... (shakes his head) I cannot allow this.
Mike: Joey, I kinda have a lot to do today, what do you want?
Mike: That must have been one lousy movie.
Phoebe: No! We're gonna do it my way. (listens) Because your way is stupid! Alright I gotta go, I have another call, Reverend. (switches calls) Hello?
Ross: (barely containing himself at this point) Well, you have fun tonight.
Ross: Rachel, only one of us can do it, you have to choose. You and me together again. (he winks at her and Rachel looks disgusted)
Rachel: (sarcastic) Wow, this is a tough one. I think I'm gonna have to go with the dog.
Mike: (to Chandler and Ross) You know, Chappy's too small to handle all this snow. Someone's gonna have to walk him down the aisle.
Monica: Okay, if Joey does the ceremony, then we have to find someone else to walk Phoebe down the isle.
Monica: (checking her clipboard) I have you scheduled for nudity at 2300 hours.
Rachel: Geez Ross, you could have showered.
Phoebe: When I was growing up, I didn't have a normal mom and dad, or a regular family like everybody else, and I always knew that something was missing. But now I'm standing here today, knowing that I have everything I'm ever gonna need... You are my family. (She puts the ring on Mikes finger)
Phoebe: Oh wait, oh I forgot... and uhm... I love you... and you have nice eyes.
Chandler: I'd love to, but it's 2300 hours and I'm about to have the most organized sex anyone's ever had.
ESTL: Oh, I see. Well, I'm just gonna put in a call here and we'll find out what's goin' on and straighten it out. [picks up the phone] Yeah, hi, Lori please. [pause] Hi darling. So how 'bout Joey Tribbiani for the part of the cab driver, isn't he terrific? [pause] Uh-huuuuh. [pause] Uh-huuuuh. OK, doll. Talk to you later. [hangs up] [to Joey] Yeah, you're gonna have to sleep with her.
PHOEBE: Ok, question number 28, have you ever allowed a lighning bearer to take your wind? I would have to say no.
Rachel: I could not have done this without you.
Mrs. Green: Oh, Im so happy Im gonna do this for my little girl. Aw, look at you. You have tears in your eyes.
(Monica and Chandler's room. Phoebe, Monica and Chandler have their ears pressed against the wall, and Joey looks at them)
Ross: Chandler, have you ever put on a black cocktail dress and asked me up to your hotel room?
Joshua: But, I was curious; do you have any plans for tonight?
Phoebe: You guys, we said we were gonna have fun! Come on, hey, remember the time (She starts laughing hysterically.) You dont remember?
Aurora: Okay. Oh no, I have to.
Aurora: You have me!
Monica: Rachel, you can go down there, you don't have to smoke. Just say you wanna get some fresh air.
Phoebe: I really don't want to mess up what we have. I'm justI'm worried it's gonna be a big mistake.
Joey: Excuse me, Aaron? (The director turns around.) Hi! Umm, I have a little problem with the schedules. Originally, I wasnt supposed to work today, and I have this wedding that I really have to be at. Its my best friends, and Im officiating so I really cant work past four.
Mrs. Geller: Well, they don't have to know that... (She starts to fluff the same pillow Monica fluffed multiple times earlier.)
Monica: I have no idea what you just said.
Rachel: Oh God, oh. Great, Monica, y'know what, you could've called, I have been up here, I've been worried...
Rachel: I just never had a relationship with that kind of passion, you know, where you have to have somebody right there, in the middle of a theme park.
Monica: No fair. I don't even have one. How come they get two?
Joey: No, I don't think it's just about just getting a girlfriend. Y'know? I mean, yeah, I can get a girlfriend! Yeah, we could sit in the chair and do crosswords, but y'know are we ever going to have y'know the closeness like-like you guys have?
Joey: We have a winner!
Rachel: I have absolutely no idea.
Joey: No way! Kay look, if I have to go to the doctor for anything its gonna be for this thing sticking out of my stomach! (Rolls over and shows Chandler.)
Paolo: Ah, you... have the sex?
The Professor: Do you have a moment to talk about your lecture?
Joey: Hey Ross. This probably isn't the best time to bring it up, but you have to throw a party for Monica.
Rachel: Anyway, theres this big charity ball this weekend and Ralph Lauren bought a table, so I kinda have to go
Monica: Okay, I-I d'know, you-you just- you have a quality.
Mr. Geller: She may have died.
Joey: You do have a choice!! Ross, why are you listening to her?! Are you, are you crazy?!
Chandler: I just have to know, okay. Is it my hair?
Ross: OK, I have a question. Well, actually, it's not so much a question as.. more of a general wondering... ment.
Shelley: I dunno, uh... you just have a-a...
ROSS: No. You're just gonna have to accept the fact that you're just friends now, OK, you're not... rommmates anymore.
Ross: No! Nonono, wait a sec. I may have something in the back.
Joey: Well, this-this-this was great. Didnt everybody have a great time?
Rachel: Well, yeah, right, yknow what? Yeah, youre right, I mean, we no, we have our fun. Yeah! But if (Grunts uncomprehensively) I mean, I mean like craaaazy! Yknow? Okay, all right. This is gonna, this is gonna sound yknow, a little umm, hasty, but uh, just go with it. Umm. Ugh. What if we got married?
Mrs. Geller: (to Monica) Your grandmother would have hated this.
Ross: Listen, I know you wanted to talk to me, but I have an idea that may make you want to stay married. (Rachel shakes her head.) We register, and you get to keep all the presents!
Chandler: So you don't think I have a, a quality?
Chandler: Have you figured out what started the fire Mr. Fireman?
(Cut to Joey's apartment. Joey looks inside the cardboard box that used to be the home of Chick Jr. and Duck Jr., but they have disappeared.)
Monica: I can't believe Phoebe's gonna have her babies!
Joey: Well I had a great time! Learned how to bake, ate great food, thats the first A Ive gotten since seventh grade, and I didnt have to sleep with the teacher this time.
Aunt Lillian: She may have died?
Phoebe: See, this is exactly what we do not have time for. (She rushes into her room)
Joey: Wait, wait, we have a copy of your key.
Chandler: Do either of you have the keys?
Carol: Look, you don't have to talk to it. You can sing to it if you want.
Monica: Why would I have the keys?
Rachel: Well, you should have.
Ross: All right, fine! Fine! Have me fired! But uh, I want you to know that you and I are not all that different. I mean, I too am a neat guy. (Paul just looks at him.)
Phoebe: Yeah, but did they have to shoot him down? I mean, that was just mean.
Monica: Paolo, I really hate you for what you did to Rachel, (hands him a lasagna) but I still have five of these, so heat it at 375 until the cheese bubbles.
Monica: Mom says it's all of Manhattan, parts of Brooklyn and Queens, and they have no idea when it's coming back on.
Joey: (in obvious pain) Hey! So Estelle lined up a bunch of auditions for me tomorrow and Ill have my health insurance back in no time.
Phoebe: Ooh, you guys have to make a wish.
Rachel: Im serious, I really, I think I need just to have some...meaningless, sex y'know, with the next guy that I see.
Joey: But between you and Phoebe, Id have to give the edge to Phoebe.
Elizabeth: Oh yeah. So umm, did you have a nickname for me?
Monica: Do you always have to bring him here?
Phoebe: Okay, alright, I have a question, then.
RICHARD: No. You have got it completely wrong. John Savage was deerhunter, no legs, John Voit was coming home, couldn't feel his legs.
Max: No. Have you seen David?
Monica: No, thank you! You have given me so much! I mean, if it wasn't for you, I would never have gotten to sing Memories on the stage at the Wintergarden Theater!
Rachel: Alright. In high school I was the prom queen and I was the homecoming queen and the class president and you... were also there! But if you take this monkey, I will lose one of the most important people in my life. You can hate me if you want, but please do not punish him. C'mon, Luisa, you have a chance to be the bigger person here! Take it!
Joey: Hey! (stands up) As soon as it stops raining we have got to go snorkeling! Some kid told me about the sea turtle and, if you blow bubbles in its face, it chases ya! (smiles ecstatic)
Donny: Uh, Gene, you're gonna have a chance to go to the winner circle in the second half. But right now Henrietta you are going to the winner circle to try your luck for ten thousand dollars, right after this, don't go away.
Rachel: (breaking the hug) Oh, hey, dont you have to go pick up Emily?
Phoebe: Oh, I'm sorry, oh, I just, I thought we could have them whipped and then add some peas and onions.
Chandler: Oh well, not as lovely as you. I mean, I cant believe that you would have a thirty-year-old daughter! (To Mr. Geller) And you! I cant believe that you would have a tux thats thirty years old! (Puts his hand on Mr. Gellers shoulder.)
Ross: Oh, I don't know, they seem to have a shared interest in each other's tonsils...
Rachel: All right, yknowFine! You guys have your stupid little club, but I would just like to say is what you did to me is way worse than what I did to you! You gave me a tiney-wienie! (Will laughs.)
Monica: Ok, here we go. We need to sort out the tickets as quickly as possible to see if we've won. So does anybody have any ideas how to organize this? (doesn't let them answer) Ok, how about this: we divide them into 6 groups of 40, and the remaining 10 can be read by whoever finishes their pile first.
Joey: Set another place for Thanksgiving. My entire family thinks I have VD.
Rachel: Ross, please, trust me. I buy 30 fashion magazines a month. Now, I don't know who's running for president or who that... NATO guy is, but I do know that you have to get as far away as you can from that hat.
Rachel: Well,sounds like you two have issues.
Rachel: Okay, I think we can get the evaluation back before they see it, but were gonna have to get into Mr. Zelners office. Now, he doesnt get in until 10, so hes no problem, but his assistant, Betty, she comes in early to eat her breakfast at her desk.
Phoebe: Okay (walks out and closes the door behind her, looks up and whispers) If you guys have microphones in there too, I didn't mean any of that. I love you.
Ross: Oh, no-no-no, see, that-that clocks a little fast, uh, we have 17 minutes. Huh, what can we do in 17 minutes? Twice?
Joey: Whoa-whoa-whoa! Before you start handing out wedding rings and planning bachelor parties, dont you have to decide who your best man is gonna be?
Phoebe: All I got was a lousy key chain! And by that time I was living in a box. I didn't have keys!
Phoebe: Well, we both have.
Ross: Because he called here looking for you. So don�t tell me this...this kissing this guy from work is a one time thing,ok? You�ve been out there in bars and on balconies for over a month now. And you didn�t even have the courtesy to tell me.
Ross: I was the James Michener of dirty talk. It was the most elaborate filth you have ever heard. I mean, there were characters, plot lines, themes, a motif... at one point there were villagers.
Monica: Why did I 'woo-hoo'? I mean, what was I hoping would happen? That-that he'd turn round and say 'I love that sound, I must have you now'?
Rachel: No, I didn't. I wouldn't say I had the keys unless I had the keys, and I obviously didn't have the keys.
Chandler: (to Rachel) Uh, Rach... I think I have something that belongs to you. (shows her the cuffs)
Rachel: Hi! You guys, the car-service just got here. I can't believe they're not home yet! I have to catch my stupid plane. I wanna see the baby!
Chandler: Ok, you're going to have to stop that, forever!
Ross: Well maybe she wouldnt have to be selfish in bed if someone else knew where everything was!
Monica: Y'know in a weird way, you have too much power. Look, youre gonna have to help me out here, cause I only have three.
Chandler: Oh, yeah, you have to tell her.
Ross: I have no idea. No matter what I do, though, I'm still gonna be a father.
Rachel: (taking cookie) Ok, thanks Pheebs (takes bite of cookie, overwhelmed) Oh my God, why have I never tasted these before?!
Rachel: Pheebs, if I had never met him this never would have happened!
Phoebe: Should I not have told you?
Ross: Oh-oh-okay, but-but I know, that even though I've been a-a complete idiot up 'til now, I mean, I mean you-you-you have to come here. You have to come here so we can work this out.
Chandler: Not like that, I won't! (pauses) Kip would have liked the birds! (Joey turns and gives Chandler a dirty look)
Joey: I mean seriously, shes like the perfect woman. I mean I know she turned me down, but if she hadnt and wanted to be with me, I would take her in my arms and (Realizes everyone is staring.) I havent bummed you guys out like this in a while have I?
Ross: Yeah, thats okay, I mean if you guys all have to go away for the first weekend Im alone by myself, y'know then I totally, totally understand.