words in movies
CHANDLER: Ok, you can have it. [He licks it and offers it to her.]
PHOEBE: Yeah, I met him when I was playing guitar in Washington Square Park. Ryan threw in salt water taffy 'cause he didn't have any change.
PHOEBE: No. No, he is my submaring guy. He resurfaces like every couple years and we have the most amazing three days together. Only this time he's coming for two weeks. Two whole weeks, which means yay.
MONICA: Honey, you made the bed again. I told you, you don't have to do that. This isn't camp.
RICHARD: Monica... [He re-enters the bedroom and Monica jumps on the bed, trying to cover it.] Hey Mon, I have a question. Is Leroy the baddest man in the whole damn town or the fattest man in the whole damn town?
CHANDLER: It's not that hard to learn. And as for people realizing you have no idea what you're doing, hey, you're an actor. Act like a processor, people will think you're a processor.
MONICA: It's gonna be ok. Ryan's been under water. He's just gonna be so glad that you don't have barnicles on your butt.
PHOEBE: Well, no no, you have to stay back. I, I have the pox.
PHOEBE: 'Cause my, my grandmother's never had chicken pox. Please, please tell me you have, 'cause oh my God, I forgot how cute you are.
PHOEBE: Yeah, or you know, you could just wish that I didn't have them now.
RYAN: Phoebe, I have spent the last eight months in a steel tube with men, thinking about this moment. I am not gonna let a bunch of itchy spots stand between us. [He walks to her and kisses her.]
CHANDLER: Really? Wow. That's some pretty powerful imaginary sperm you must have there.
ROSS: You know, I might have expected this of you Phoebe, but Ryan, you're a military man.
JOEY: You and Milton have to join us on the boat. Karen'll pack a lunch, you'll bring the kids, we'll make a day of it.
JEANNIE: Oh, that sounds lovely. We're gonna have to set that up. Oh, I better get back. Hope the baby feels better.
MR. DOUGLAS: I have a family, I'm gonna be here.
MR. DOUGLAS: Have the final numbers on my desk by Tuesday.
RICHARD: You know, I like the way you have efficiently folded this tab under. See in a tape emergency you could shave valuable seconds off your time.
MONICA: No. You don't have any of these cute little obsessive things.
MONICA: You would not. I can't believe this. I hate this, you're too normal. I can't believe my boyfriend doesn't have a thing. My boyfriend doesn't have a thing.
CHANDLER: Alright, that's it. Look Joey, I'm sorry, I realize this is the role of a lifetime for ya, and if I could just fire Joseph, I would, but unfortunately that's not possible so I'm gonna have to let both of you go.
CHANDLER: Oh well it's not me, it's my character, Chandy. Yeah the rogue processor who seduces his co-worker's wives for sport and then laughs about it the next day at the water cooler. In fact, I have her panties right there in my drawer.
RICHARD: Yeah. I have to sleep, have to, on this side of the bed.
MONICA: No honey. You have to sleep on this side of the bed because I have to sleep on this side of the bed.
RICHARD: Or so I would have you believe.
MONICA: No. Big deal, so you have a side of the bed, everybody has a side of the bed.
RICHARD: Ok, I have to sleep on the west side because I grew up in California and otherwise the ocean would be on the wrong side.
ROSS: So do you have like any nuclear weapons on board?
Rachel: Phoebe, you have to calm down.
Joey: Yeah. I am sorry he's not here too, but I got to say, (takes some nachos from a plate on the seat where Chandler should have been) I am really enjoying Nacho Chair.
[Scene: The corridor. Ross and Joey have just arrived.]
Joey: Wait a second, wait a second, where have I seen that cowgirl outfit before...
Ross: So, this must be kinda neat for ya, huh? I mean, your Dad tells me that you get a couple of days off school, and you, you ah, dont have to sell those cookies anymore.
Joey: No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no... I think it's better if you tell him, you know. It's easier for a woman. That way, you know, if he gets mad, all you have to do is go... I didn't mean it. I'm so so--ooory. (he pushes his breasts together from the side)
Joey: Because... look, no one wants this to happen more than me, ok? (in a trembling voice) I have gone over this moment in my head a hundred times and not once did I ever say no! (sighs) I couldn't do it to Ross!
Rachel: (gasps) Oh, I just remembered. We do have something to eat. Monica put something in our oven this morning.
Monica: Oh! Enough! A monkey could have made 'em!
Monica: Oh, well. Now that I'm here I might as well help you with the cleaning and organizing! Just happen to have my label maker!
Joey: Yeah! You three have a nice Thanksgiving.
Monica: Okay, I have to get that. Now when I get back, I want you and your friends to be gone. Thanksgiving is over. The Vein has spoken.
Chandler: The Bings have horrible marriages! They yell. They fight. And they use the pool boy as a pawn in their sexual games!
Phoebe: I know. Have you considered pageanting?
Joey: I can't believe it. When you guys come back, you're gonna have a baby! That is so weird!
Ross: Damnit! I have this date tomorrow night and I have to look cool!
Chandler: I suppose that Monica will have the � manipulative shrew.
Chandler: Yeah. Just weird, you know. It's like: "Hi, I'm Chandler. May I have the human growing inside you?"
Phoebe: (to Joey) You wouldn’t let her have a grape?
Mona: Yeah, you still have feelings for me. And-and to be honest, I-I still have feelings for you. And I wish that we can work it out Ross, but we cant. Its too complicated with you and Rachel and the baby, I-I just It just wasnt meant to be.
Chandler: Well, I umm, I mean this is just off the top of my head now, umm but I have this friend. This actor friend and he would kill me if he thought I was doing this umm, but umm would it be possible for him to get an audition for your movie say on Thursday?
Erica: We’re great, I think I may have asked all my questions.
Erica: Actually, I don’t think we have to.
Monica: Oh man! If I had known I was coming to this party I never would have gotten married!
Chandler: You have gotta stop!
Monica: (sniffing) Maybe she will. Uh! Why couldn't I have been a Reverend?
Joey: Hey, I may never have kids, and somebody's gotta carry on my family name.
Phoebe: Ooh, so this is great! Rachel's gonna have a terrible date, Ross gets stood up, and then they'll realise how good they have it together.
Joey: Oh, all right, I'll just have what she's having instead.
Monica: Come on! Tests make us all better learners! Oh yeah! (Running out) We should have essay questions!!
(Chandler takes Monica's hand, and gets serious) Look, before we sign anything we really have to talk...(pause) We're not who you think we are.
Joey: (taking apart the invitation) Hey, pretty smart! Tissue paper! Youre at the wedding, you have to cry, "Handkerchief?" "No-no, I got my invitation."
Phoebe: (running up carrying a tree) Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait! No, no, you dont want that one. No, you can have this cool brown one. (points to the almost dead tree she has)
Chandler: Okay! (They kiss) So, what do you girls have planned for tonight?
Chandler: Oh, uhm... I have to work too. Yeah, I'm stuck at the office all day.
Phoebe: Why do you have a realtor?
Ross: Yeah, I mean, if you moved there, you have to leave here. I mean, how can you leave this place?
Ross: You can see where he'd have trouble.
Phoebe: Well, of course it smells really bad. You have your head inside a turkey's ass!
Monica: I got it! How about, if we win, they have to get rid of the rooster?
Ross: Wow! It actually is in the handbook. I cant date you or have a hot plate in my office. I cant believe we have to stop seeing each other.
Chandler: Tonight?! (looks at the ring) Isn't an engagement ring supposed to have a diamond? (squints at the ring to emphasize how tiny the diamond is) Oh, there it is!
Rachel: Yeah, I know, I know, I know he does. But I have to tell him how I feel! He deserves to have all the information and then he can make an informed decision.
Rachel: (To Joey) Yeah I knowIm goodI got it! (Joey slowly backs away.) (To the boy) Now wait a minute, Ive got one more thing I have to say to you oh right! Shut up!
Chandler: I have a weird feeling about this place. (pause) How do I know that they are not gonna secretly videotape me and put it all over the internet.
CHANDLER: Monica, will you stop? This is nuts. Do you know how long it's gonna be before you actually have to deal with this problem? I mean, you don't even have a boyfriend yet. Joey, she does not look fat.
Hoshi: You are iron. You are steel! Let me ask you something, how come when I call your computer support line, I have to wait an hour and a half?
Rachel: Well sure, if you say youre gonna take care of everything I have no reason to doubt you. Give me those forms! (Grabs them from him.) All right, now Im gonna do this my way and I dont want to hear a peep out of you!
Joey: (on the screen there's the word "Supermarket") Uhm... ok. It's a store, like a supermarket. (there is a sound indicating he made a mistake as he shouldn't have said 'supermarket'. The next word appears, "notebook") Oh! I see-I see what I did. Yeah, ok, ok, uhm... I'm writing in my...
Monica: Well, you don't have to decide right now, but if you could just look at our file...
Rachel: Alright, come on... (starts to knock on the door) Alright, you guys. We're so sorry we're late. Please let us in, so we can have dinner together.
Joey: Hey, you dont even live here anymore! What are you doing answering my phone? I have my machine!
Monica: Chandler, we have talked about this. You are not supposed to give people advice! Now couldn't you just have made some sort of inappropriate joke?
Roy: Ooh, boy. You should warn people there's no elevator! I should not have had that Mexican food for lunch.
Chandler: Well, I think it's great that you're going on a date, you know? I mean, it sounds healthy. I mean, you have needs. Embrace your womanhood!
Ross: If like the four of us could all yknow, hang out together. Uh, in fact Emilys coming into town this weekend, why dont you say we all have dinner? Say, Sunday night?
Phoebe: I can't ask him! Do you have any idea how inappropriate that would be?! All I'm saying is just talk to Frank. Okay? Just, y'know, feel him out!
RACHEL: Well, we're not here to meet guys.� You have a boyfriend, I have a b. . . baby and a Ross.
Ross: Rach, I-I cant tell you how-how much that means to me! Ohh Wait a minute. Wait a minute. You-you hated the name Ruth! Why-why would you change your mind? Unless, you know were never going to have to use it. You did see the folder. You know its a boy!
Roy: (out of breath) Have to...
Chase Lassiter: (talking to Rachel) You look familiar, have we...
Ross: Okay! You guys are getting married tomorrow and-and I couldnt be more thrilled for both of you, but as Monicas older brother I-I have to tell you this. If you ever hurt my little sister, if you ever cause her any unhappiness of any kind, I will hunt you down, and kick your ass! (Chandler laughs.) What? Im-Im-Im serious! (Chandler laughs harder.) ComeHey! Dude! Stop it! Okay? Im-Im not kidding here!
Monica:: Oh well this is the only one they had at our video store, but they did have something called crocodile killers. Or does it always have to be sharks?
Phoebe: Good. It's just so hard, it's hard for me to ... let them go. I guess it just brings back memories, you know, from ... when I gave birth to my brother's triplets and I had to give them up. (Mike is shocked) I haven't told you about that yet, have I?
Monica: I dont believe this! When someone asks you in for lemonade, and to you that means they wanna have sex?
Mr. Geller: Have a seat son. (You can see Mr. Geller sitting closer to the door as Chandler walks over and sits in his lap.) Hey!! (Chandler quickly jumps off and sits next to him with a shocked expression on his face.)
Rachel: Joey, do you have peanut butter on the back of your head?
Chandler: (to Rachel) You know what I just realized? We have no idea what we're doing in the wedding tomorrow.
Phoebe: I don't have a fax machine.
Ross: No, I can't. I have back-to-back classes. Did Molly say what she had? Because my throat's been hurting?
Phoebe: Oh, I don't wanna choose! It's (Rachel is walking by). Oh okay, wait. Rach! Listen I have a very special bridesmaid task for you today.
Mike: Do I have a minute to go to the bathroom?
Sarah: (laughing) No. If I can't have your clams, you can't have my dessert. This is a two way street.
Joey: May I have a word with you, please?
Mike: Joey, I kinda have a lot to do today, what do you want?
Monica: Okay, the reason why I asked you guys out to brunch today is because I have been doing some thinking about who should be my maid of honor.
Mike: That must have been one lousy movie.
Joey: All right, I guess I can hold out a little longer. Let's have a game.
Rachel: (sarcastic) Wow, this is a tough one. I think I'm gonna have to go with the dog.
Ross: No I'm serious. I mean she wants to date people? Fine! I don't care but...at least she could have told me. You knowI...I've been putting my life on hold and just concentrating on Emma but if she wants to go out there kissing guys shebarely knows, then so will I ! Very funny! Ross is gay! Ah! Ah!
Pete: Y'know I have a torn rotator cuff, a hairline fracture in my right forearm, and a severely bruised Adams Apple, but that really hurt.
Ross: Really? That would be great. I mean, I have to do something, she kinda teased me about how I dress.
Amy: You know what? Ever since I got here, you have been nothing but negative.
Phoebe: Oh wait, oh I forgot... and uhm... I love you... and you have nice eyes.
Cowgirl: (interrupting) Can I just have the candy?
Rachel: Oh man! This is so great! I actually feel like Im going on a real date! Although, I have a hint of morning sickness, and Im wearing underwear that goes up to about (She snaps the waistband on her underwear that is just slightly below her breasts) there.
Dr. Green: Ooh, I have a little heart attack.
Phoebe: I, I have to go before I put your head through a wall. (she leaves)
{Oh, all right! Geez, I can't have any fun!}
Chandler: They thought it was very smart of us to have a child write the recommendation letter.
[Scene: Monica's apartment. Monica and Erica have just arrived.]
Chandler: I'd keep an eye on him! We have to find out which one the father is.
Rachel: No, wait. No there's gotta be something else that you can do. I mean, what skills do you have?
Joey: (entering) Hey. (Ross turns to see who it is, and seeing its Joey he just ignores him and turns back around.) Ross, I know youre pissed at me, but we have to talk about this.
Rachel: Geez Ross, you could have showered.
Monica: Nope, she doesn't have to, I found out who the father is.
Ross: (entering) Hey, you guys... I have great news.
Rachel: Oh my God! That's my boss. You have to seat us somewhere else.
Nurse: Youve done all you can Dr. Wesley. You have got to let her go.
Monica: Okay, so from now on we have to call you Princess Consuela?