words in movies
Monica: Oh my God. (Grabs Phoebe and turns her away) Phoebe. Don't look now, but behind us is a guy who has the potential to break our hearts and plunge us into a pit of depression.
Jay Leno: (on TV) Folks, when we come back we'll be talking about her new book, 'Euphoria Unbound': the always interesting Nora Tyler Bing. You might wanna put the kids to bed for this one.
Rachel: Chandler, I gotta tell you, I love your mom's books! I love her books! I cannot get on a plane without one! I mean, this is so cool!
(Rachel feeds something to Paolo. He eats it and licks her hand)
Ross: The girl on the cover with her nipples showing?
Joey: I'll have you know that Gloria Tribbiani was a handsome woman in her day, alright? You think it's easy giving birth to seven children?
Joey: (Shouting after him) Chandler, I didn't kiss her, he did! (To Ross) See what happens when you break the code?
Phoebe: (Walks up with her guitar) Hey Rach.
Joey: C'mon! Just try to picture her not pregnant, that's all.
Phoebe: Thanks. Hi, um, 'kay. I'd like to start with a song that's about a man that I recently met, who's, um, come to be very important to me. (Monica gives her a look) 'Kay. (Sung:)
Chandler: Yes, well, I expect this from her. Okay? She's always been a Freudian nightmare.
Ross: No! Okay, you mean, you're not gonna talk to her, you're not gonna tell her how you feel?
Chandler: That would be no. Look, just because you played tonsil tennis with my mom doesn't mean you know her. Alright? Trust me, you can't talk to her.
Joey: Shh. He did it. He told her off, and not just about the kiss, about everything.
Chandler: Yeah, why not. (They shake hands) So I told her.
Chandler: Pretty good! I told her.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Rachel is handing out copies of her book to the gang.]
Rachel: Okay. Now this is just the first chapter, and I want your absolute honest opinion. Oh, oh, and on page two, he's not 'reaching for her heaving beasts'.
[Cut to Monica and Chandler's, Sick Monica is trying to entice Chandler to have sex with her.]
Ross: Oh well, I guess Ill catch up with her later.
Rachel: Oh my God, look-look hes taking off her clothes!
Chandler: (to Rachel) Uh, Rach... I think I have something that belongs to you. (shows her the cuffs)
Phoebe: Yeah okay... yeah, your mom... okay... She looks nice, I can talk to her.
Rachel: Hi. (He helps her up.) Umm, I think theres something that we really need to talk about.
Chandler: Oh, its not just that, I would be Englands most powerful weapon. Jet setting heartbreaker on her majestys secret service. A man who fears no one; with a license to kill. (Worried.) Would Monica let me wear this?
Dina: Well, at least Im not a murderer! (Jessica slaps her.)
Ross: Oh sure. (He sits on the apothecary table and touches her hand.)
Ross: (grabs her) Shh! Shh! Shh!
Ross: Look, is Rachel here? I really need to talk to her.
Joey: Well, what did you say to her?
Ross: I gotta go find her.
Joey: Oh. Maybe. But hey I know how I can find out. Were going to a New Years Eve party, right? So at midnight, I can kiss her. And if she kisses me back, great! Yknow? But if she says Dude, what the hell are you doing? I can say It wasnt me, it was New Years!
Phoebe: What if we don't find him somebody else? We'll just tell her the date's off, but we don't tell Ross, and he goes to the restaurant and gets stood up!
Joey: Yeah! You gotta tell a girl before you tape her. Such a rookie mistake.
Chandler: Here you go. (Shows her the number again.)
Joey: (sees hes watching Baywatch) Ohhh. (sees he still has the chick) Ahh! What are you doing?! I thought you were gonna take her back to the store today.
Frank Sr.: Y'know, I don't think I want the lipstick that much. (Gets up to leave.) But umm Oh, would you do me a favor? And umm, would you, would you give Lilly that, please? (Hands her a note.)
Joey: Yknow what? This is not fair to her. Lets just forget the tape!
[Sequence 2: Phoebe throws the ball, and its intercepted by Joey, who starts to run up field. Rachel jumps on his back in order to try and tackle him, but she doesnt slow him down. Monica and Phoebe then both grab her legs in order to stop Joey, who still manages to fight through the tackle and score the touchdown.]
Monica: (rolling her head from side to side) Joke. Joke. Blah! Blah! (Joey and Phoebe laugh.)
Joey: Well, maybe I can help. (he grabs her head passionately, closes his eyes and kisses... Ross in Rachel's dress! He realises it too late, and when he does, pushes Ross's/Rachel's head away)
(She lets her hair down and whips her hair around in Baywatch-esque slow motion with a Barry White song in the background. Chandler needless to say cant help but stare along with the rest of the male and lesbian population of North America.)
[Scene 13: Central Perk, the gang is gathered around Monica comforting her brother, who in a slight state of shock is cuddling a cushion for security.]
(Rachel clears her throat.)
(He starts chasing her around Rachel a couple of times before she runs into the living room and he tackles her on the couch where he starts tickling her.)
Joey: (grabbing her) Here we go! Here we go! (Starts to pull her away from Kash.)
Ross: Im just thinking about your new bride at home. Okay? Do-do you really want to start your life together by letting her down?
[Monica pushes Ben down the aisle in a stroller. Susan is escorted by both her parents. Carol is escorted by Ross.]
Joey: I set her up with this actor on my show.
(Now they kiss passionately... and then Ross enters with Emma. They freeze, pull away and look at Ross who looks like he just can't believe what he's seeing. Joey straightens his shirt, and Rachel says I'm so-oo sorry, and presses her breasts together, just like Joey did before.)
Rachel: YeahOoh! Earrings! (Goes into her room.)
Ross: You set her up?!
Monica: (entering from her bedroom) I gotta go to work. Has anybody seen my left boob?
Ross: And this girl is making eyes at Chandler, okay? So after awhile he-he goes over to her and uh, after a minute or two, I see them kissing. Now, I know what youre thinking, Chandlers not the type of guy who just goes to bars and makes out with girls, and youre right, Chandlers not the type of guy who just goes to bars and makes out with girls.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Rachel is not doing the dishes. She hears someone coming up the stairs and quickly puts down her magazine and pretends like shes actually doing the dishes.]
Rachel: Oh is it?! (She answers the cute guys phone.) Uhh, hello? (On her phone) Yes hi, is Rachel there? (On the other phone) Yes she is, just one moment please. (To Phoebe, holding out both phones.) Its for me!
(Ross continues to talk to her as the camera pans to show Rachel standing in the doorway.)
Phoebe: Now wasnt Joey hitting on her at the wedding too?
Ross: Thats right! He was hitting on her, and I got her. I guess the better man won. (To Joey) Please dont take her from me.
Chandler: (sitting down on the arm of her chair) You didnt think I used to wear glasses, right?
Rachel: Yeah I know, but one of them just said that she loved me so I just gave her everything.
Eric: Im an idiot. Uh, is your mother here? Maybe I can give her a little slap on the butt.
Monica: Ugh, I can not believe this! I mean, who is she to judge us? We could not have been nicer to her!
Cecilia: No! Its because that way the camera only sees her! (She takes her hands off his face.) Do you wanna try it?
Chandler: (To Ross) Marry her.
Pete: Well ah, the short version is, I ah pursued her for a couple of months, then I gave her a check for 20,000 dollars, and she was mine.
Joey: (to her) Youre a weird lady.
Eric: (entering) Hey. Ursula said she left her purse.
Joey: Well, hes not used to women being so forward with him; but uh, I good check with himHe says its okay. (She hands him her card.) Great! Thanks! Bye-bye!
Chandler: Would you tell her I let you win please?
Monica: I've got a plan. I've got a plan. I'm going to ram this platter really hard into your ribs. You're gonna scream out and that'll wake her up!
Mrs. Verhoeven's Daughter: Are you close with her?
Monica: (To Chandler) I love her.
Man: Well I actually, I-I really, I haven't seen her for years. But umm, well I-I was pretty tight with-with her and her daughter.
Phoebe: Yeah. (Covers her face with her hand.) Yeah.
Ben: (jumping up from behind her chair) Gotcha!! (Rachel jumps up startled.)
Rachel: What the hell is that?!! (to Monica) What the hell is that? Is that you? (Monica nods her head no, and Rachel realizes what is making that sound.) Ohhhhhhh! (storms over to Chandler and Joeys with Monica in trail.)
Chandler: Okay. (He gets up and goes to find her.)
Chandler: To see her pants?
Monica: (Looking nauseous from her parents kissing.) And Im going to go get drunk. (Gets up to get a drink.)
Monica: Because I put my head between her legs.
[Scene: Ross and Rachel's apartment. Emma is sitting in her chair on the apothecary table and Rachel is trying to make her laugh.]
Monica: I would do it but she thinks Im attracted to her!
Mrs. Verhoeven's Daughter: Well, her memory is pretty much gone.
Eric: No-no its not! I dont want to lose you! Its-its like I was saying to Ursula when I was making love to her and I thought she was youYeah it is too weird.
Eric: Yeah. (They hug.) Maybe its for the best. You smell just like her.
Joey: I did that too! They wouldnt give me her real name or her number. They said, "If I bothered them again theyd call the police." I said, "If you talk to the police, you tell them Im missing a ring!"
[Cut the hallway, Rachel is exited from Monicas when the door closes on her skirt.]
Joey: And, a brownie! (Hands her a bag with the brownie in it.) Well, half a brownie. Actually, its just bag. Its been a long walk from the flower shop and I was startin to feel faint so
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's, Joey and Rachel are toasting her staying put.]
Monica: (grabs the guitar away from her) No, Phoebe, Ill tell you what, if you get ready now Ill let you play it at the wedding.
Chandler: Her what?!!
Joey: Hey, Im not interested in her sweater! Its whats underneath her sweater that counts. And besides, since ah, since when do you care who Im going out with?
Ross: Uh, in her defense, shes right. I am stronger. I would destroy you.
Dr. Green: Who is the father? Oh no! Please dont tell me its her! (Points at Phoebe.)
Monica: Okay! I will! Mrs. Green? Mrs. Green! (She ignores Monica and Monica follows her out into the hall with Phoebe in tow.) It is rude to leave a party without saying good-bye to the host! Yeah, and-and also when someone apologizes to you the decent thing to do is to accept it! Now what I did to you, it wasnt on purpose! But what youre during to me now is just plain spiteful!
Ross: Well I I havent actually told her yet. I dont want to scare her off, yknow?
Monica: Wow! Wow! And its definitely all gone? Theres nothing there to work with? (Joey glares at her.) What were you thinking?
Ross: No, its not what I want either. I mean I-I cant force myself to fall in love with her again now.
Ross: All right then. (Follows her in and checks the place out.)
Caitlin: Y'know what? That's okay, you guys have ordered so many that this one is on me! (Runs for her life.)
Ross: (to Mona) Oh but not that way. I mean I mean Im not in love with her. I love her like a, like a friend.
Joey: Maybe Monicas playing a joke on ya. Yknow? Getting her own husband a hooker, thats pretty funny.
[Scene: Phoebes, Frank and her, are sitting on the counh, watching TV]
Ross: Oh I know, isn't it? Ooh... what'd you do to get her to laugh?
Joey: You shut up! (To Phoebe and Rachel) I love arguing with her. (To Erin) Ill be right back.
Chandler: (angrily) Did she call? You-you told her I was sick right? Always tell her I am sick!
Rachel: All right, I promise. Ill fix this. I swear. Ill-Ill-Ill-Ill talk to her.
Phoebe: Ohh! All right! All right. Heres what well do, Ill get twice as drunk as Monica and then no ones will even notice her.
Phoebe: (running up) Okay. Okay, heres what were gonna do. Okay, Im gonna break into this mini-van and put it in neutral. You guys push it forward so Ross can drive out of his spot. Okay? All right, here we go. (She opens her coat and reveals that thing car thieves use to break into cars as Ross jumps in behind the wheel. She inserts the device, unlocks the door, opens it, and the alarm goes off.) Haul ass!!!! (Runs off.)
Monica: I swear I didnt know she was a hooker! I mean whDid you let her smoke in here?
Monica: You go back out there and you seduce her till she cracks!
Rachel: (looking at her fingers) Oh my God! Let me see that! (Grabs the book from him.)
Monica: Fine. Im just glad I didnt give her my secret ingredient.
Will: Nope. Uh, its okay. Its just uh, God I hated her.
[Scene: A grocery store that Janice shops in. Chandler is on purpose, accidentally bumping into her.]
Will: You went out with her?! We had a pact!
Rachel: Umm, okay. But while you dial, let me show you the features of my new ringing handbag. (Rachel dials her phone and Phoebes bag starts to ring.) Oh, it does work! (Rachel grabs the phone and takes it out of Phoebes handbag.)