words in movies
Ross: Well, Rachel moving to another country? Not being able to see her every day. How can I be okay with this?
Ross: Do you think if the Ralph Lauren people offered her her old job back, she would take it?
Ross: I don't know. I could talk to her boss. Yeah! I met him at that Christmas party. We really hit it off.
Ross: Uhm, well... I'm here to see if you'll give Rachel her job back.
Ross: Look, she loved her job here. And let's face it: you're not gonna find anyone who did it as well as she did it. Isn't that true?
Phoebe: Well, no, no, wait, wait, wait. All right, I gotta go. Just listen. Promise me, that you will wait a minute before you call her.
(Phoebe is outside, taking her cell phone out of her bag and making a call. Joey is inside, and his mobile phone starts ringing).
Ross: Emma left her stuffed t-rex at my house. You know she can’t sleep without it.
Rachel: Oh, well, she’s asleep now. Stop forcing that thing on her.
Lady: Oh, the woman upstairs is very nice. She and her husband have two kids, he's on Wall Street and she…
Joey: Yeah, I just… I just feel bad about firing Estelle. This is got to be killing her.
Phoebe: No, that wouldn’t kill her. Ordinary embolism might.
Joey: I don’t know. She’s got to be taking it hard, I was like her only client. Except for this guy who eats paper. And I’m guessing he eats more money than he makes. Look, I know she’s not a great agent, but she did stick with me for ten years. I’m gonna call her and hire her again.
Phoebe: No, no, no! Don't call her! You wait for her to call you (Joey considers it)
Phoebe: (picking up her bag) All right, so promise you're gonna wait for her to call you?
Janice: Oh, we go way back. Before Monica made an honest man out of him, Chandler used to be my little love muffin! (does her irritating laugh). So? Are you guys thinking of getting this house too? Ooh! Are we gonna have a bidding war? I'd better warn you, I'm a toughie (playfully punches Chandler, who tries to get away from her)
Janice: Ooh, that decides it then. I was on the fence. But knowing that you two would be our neighbors? Ah! now we have to get it! (Chandler and Monica are utterly shocked) Ellen, we're going to talk numbers. (Grabs Ellen by her elbow and pulls her outside)
Monica: (Thinks a little more) Okay, Okay, (clapping her hands) All right. What if we got both houses? Huh? We can turn this house into a guest house.
Chandler: Will we love it so much with her next door? And she's gonna be louder out here too. Just the crickets and (apes Janice's voice) "Oh My God"!
Monica: Okay, but if we don't get this house, she's stil gonna show up wherever we go! I mean, at least if she's here, it eliminates the element of suprise. I mean, never again will you have to hear the three words that make your balls jump back up inside your body. (She shows this with her index finger, mimicking it pushing something up)
Chandler: (looks afraid, but at the same time, knows she's right) Well, we have to do something. We can't have her living next door. (Janice's laughs loudly outside) Oh, that does it too. (Motions with his index finger like Monica did)
Ross: (enters) It's me. Ron. (Mr. Zellner looks annoyed) Look, I um, I now Rachel turned you down but I think there is a way you might be able to get her to come back.
Ross: Just hear me out. How would you feel about offering her a raise? (looks hopeful)
Janice: Although, maybe just... one last moment of weakness... (she kisses Chandler flat on the mouth. Chandler squirms. When she's finished, he looks at her lovingly but uneasily.) Goodbye Chandler Bing. (She leaves)
Rachel: Yeah, you know, was I looking forward to going to Paris? Sure. You know, was I excited about working in the fashion capital of the world? Ooh, absolutely... Oh...! Yeah, but you know, this is... it's fine. I'm fine going back to a job where I've pretty much gotten everything out of that I possibly can... (she sits down, and Ross who is stunned to hear all this follows her example)
[Scene: Estelle's memorial service. Joey is giving a speech. Next to him is a blown op photograph of Estelle behind her desk and there's a man standing next to him.]
Mike: (gets up) Joe, I love Phoebe. She's the single most important thing in my life. I'd die before I let anything happen to her.
Phoebe: You remember her from my birthday party two years ago. Shes yeah, like, average height, medium build, bald...
Rachel: Okay, wait a minute. Wait a minute, I-I-I, I can't do this. Listen honey, this is, it's not Phoebe's fault. She lent me the earrings, and I lost it. I'm so sorry. Honey, I feel terrible too. (Holds out her arms for a hug.)
Joshua: Huh. Oh, boy! (Sits down next to her.) Uhh, I-I dont wear suits to work, and I bought six of them from you.
(Monica takes a big swig of her martini.)
Chandler: Oh, it doesnt matter. (Kisses her on the top of her head.) Hey, yknow what, Ive got two tickets to tonights Rangers game, you wanna come with me?
(They go open the door and reveal Monica being spun around on the floor polisher and getting the cord wrapped around her legs.)
Joey: Hey! You hold on pal! Now you made my friend, Rachel, cry. So now, youre gonna go up there and apologize to her, unless you want me to call the landlord.
[Scene: Rachel's room. Rachel is attending to Emma. Amy is standing behind her.]
Joey: You're a lucky man. You know what I miss the most about her? That cute nibbly noise when she eats. Like a happy little squirrel, or a weasel.
Ross: Well, cant you at least stall her a little? Ill-Ill go back to some of the places I went last night.
Chandler: (To Monica) Wow! Listen, we had a good run. You know, what was it? Four? Five months? I mean, that's more than most people have in a lifetime! So, good-bye, take care, bye-bye then! (He kisses her and starts to climb out the balcony window)
Tag: (entering) Yeah? (She holds up the folder) You found them!! (Rachel is not amused, because shes still going to try to blame him for her mistake like every good boss.) Yknow what? Im not even going to gloat. Im just really relived this whole thing is over.
Joey: Yes. It's just that she's so much smarter than all the girls I've ever dated! Combined! I don't want her to think I'm stupid!
Phoebe: (hides her mouth behind the cup and speaks in the "pigeon voice" from before) Coo, again. Don't blame the pretty lady. It was not her fault. It was me, the pigeon, coo! (pause) Seriously, stop staring at her.
Chandler: (as Rachel is cutting up her cards) Y'know, if you listen closely, you can hear a thousand retailers scream.
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's apartment. Phoebe is on the phone and Monica is nonchalantly "minding her own business".]
Chandler: Okay, I accept that. When Janice asked me and I said no, she took that to mean that I was calling her a cow.
Ross: Correct. Rachel claims this is her favorite movie…
Joey: Well no, not yet. He's calling everyone on her side of the family hoping that someone will help him get in touch with her.
(She puts her head on Joey's shoulder and Joey kisses her on her head.)
Phoebe: Because you'll date her once, sleep with her and then forget she exists!
Joey: Oh I-I uh, found the keys and now Im just polishing her up.
[Scene: Beth Israel Medical Center, Phoebe is at her OB-GYN doing an ultrasound, Rachel is with her. We here the babys heartbeat.]
Pete: Her names Ann, shes a journalist. Ahh, we met on the plane. She asked me if she could finish off my peanuts, I thought she said something else, we had a big laugh. Yeah, I just, I mean I got, I got tired of waiting.
(A Chinese woman getting off the plane drops one of her bags. Ross gets off next.)
Phoebe: Whoa-whoa-whoa! No drinks near the bucket! Set it down over there and then you can make a contribution! (The guy starts to walk away with a hurt look on his face.) And you can leave the hurt bunny look over there too! (Her boss and a co-worker walk up.) Hi Bob! (The same old lady from before walks bye.) (To the old lady.) I thought I told you to get outta here!
Rachel: (yelling) Joey, there is a reason that Emma loves that stupid penguin so much (Joey covers Hugsy's ears) Oh don't cover its ears! (stops yelling) It's because it reminds her of her uncle Joey!
Chandler: Her ass print is still on your grandmothers quilt, do you really want to talk about smoking?
Chandler: Well, close to (Notices Rachel leaning in to hear and decides to write it on a piece of paper and hand it to Monica as Phoebe averts her eyes.)
PHOEBE: You know what, that's it, that's it. [She rips off the mits, Ryan follows her lead.]
(Joey starts trying to undo her bra, but it won’t go.The elastic band snaps back, hurting Rachel.)
Phoebe: What? (He leans in to kiss her.) Oh. (They kiss and Phoebe pauses.) Ooh. (Pause) Whoa! That one kept going. (Exits.)
Joey: Okay. I went down to the Mattress King showroom and, and I saw Janice, kissing her ex-husband.
Ben: Auntie Monica!! (He runs to hug her.)
Monica: So what if he wants to sleep with her? I mean, she's single and he's cute.
Melissa: (laughs) Oh you dont have to be (Laughs again) sorry. Im Im obviously kidding. Im not in love with you. (To Phoebe) Im not in love with her. I dont hear coconuts banging together. Yeah, I dont picture your face when I make love to my boyfriend. Anyway, I gotta go. Eh kiss good-bye? (Rachel stares at her stunned.) No? Okay. (Hurries into the cab and drives off.)
Ross: Look, look, theres got to be a way we can work past this. Okay, (takes a hold of one of her arms.) I cant imagine, I cant imagine my life without you. (Both of them are starting to cry.) Without, without these arms, and your face, and this heart. Your good heart Rach, (drops to his knees and hugs her around her waist) and, and....
Chandler: Well, I tried Billy Jean King, but... (Ross glares at him) you know, you and Monica have the same "I'm gonna kill you" look...? I can usually make it go away by kissing her... (Ross continues to glare at him and Chandler leans in as if he's going to kiss Ross)
Ross: Really? You dont think thats a little inappropriate. (Shes wearing a tank top and has her belly sticking out.)
(She sits back up as the policeman approaches. She undoes her top button.)
Phoebe: Oh, ok, you want me to marry Mike? Alright, well, let's just gag him and handcuff him and force him down the aisle. I can just see it: "Mike, do you take Phoebe..." (gestures with her hand as if someone is covering her mouth and tries to shout "No! No!") You know, it's every girl's dream!
[Cut to Monicas work kitchen, shes on fire again and Joey is putting her out.]
Ross: Anyway, I figured after work I'd go pick up a bottle of wine, go over there and, uh, try to woo her.
Ross: No! No! NotI dont mean I-I see her as a twelve-year-old girl! I mean I-I have a son, whos umm six and I still think of him as a baby.
Phoebe: Ewww! And "Oh no!" Itsthey just want me to be the surrogate. Its her-its her egg and her sperm, and Im-Im just the oven, its totally their bun.
RACHEL: Oh, Ross, you had to, I mean, he was humping everything in sight. I mean, I have a Malibu Barbi that will no longer be wearing white to her wedding.
Phoebe: I know! Monicas gonna have a baby! Hey, can this count as her something new?
Joey: Yeah, I saw her this morning walkin it by the park.
Phoebe: Well, maybe it wont work out. Maybe Ross wont like her personality.
Phoebe: (speaking louder and articulating) That's she's like the daughter she never had. (Phoebe points at her ears) Listen! (Monica looks at Phoebe in a duh! way)
(Matthew runs in and starts patting the other breast, then walks away. Matt slowly stops patting her breast.)
Ross: (happily) Oh. (Realizes then sadly) Oh. Well I uh, I brought her some bloemen. (Flowers in Dutch.)
Joey: Oh, I do. (Gives her the Joey-love look.) How you doin?
Phoebe: Oh, ok. Fine, I'll just, I'll take the hat back (she puts the hat in a bag and she crushes it angrily on the floor with her foot).
Rachel: Shes steaming her dress, why? Whats up?
Joey: Ohh-oh, wasnt he cheating on you with her?
Ross: S-s-smell her hair? What if I did?
Phoebe: She is lying! And I bet I can prove it. Excuse me. (She grabs Ursulas purse and starts going through it and finds some papers.) Okay. Okay. YeahNot a prayer chain, but what looks like a detailed drawing of a bank floor plan. (Holds up her nametag.) Okay, heres the nametag from the restaurant where she works as a waitress! Not a teacher, a waitress. All right, heres her driver license, this oughta be good, she always lies about this. How old did she say she was?
Monica: You dated her!
[Scene: The Gellers Garage, Monica is picking through her ruined childhood heirlooms with Ross.]
Ross: Yeah! Yeah, Emily always wanted to get married in this beautiful place that her parents got married, but its going to be torn down, so I mean, I-I know its crazy, but everything up til now has been so crazy, and I dont know, this just feels right. Yknow?
Chandler: Did I teach her that? Did I just... impart wisdom?
Chandler: Yeah, just some 9-year-old Filipino kids who worked their fingers bloody for 12 cents an hour. (Phoebe stares at him wide-eyed. Chandler sees her reaction.) That didn't happen, I made that up!
Joey: You are so the man! (motions him to come in, and he does) Now look, listen, listen, you got to be cool, cause my Grandma doesnt know about you two yet, and you do not want to tick her off. She was like the sixth person to spit on Mussolini's hanging body. Yeah.
Monica: I know! And four ninety-nine for a pillow top queen set, who cares about the divorce, those babies will sell themselves. (they all stare at her) And Im appalled for you by the way.
Monica: And when I told her that I was gonna be moving in with Chandler, she was really supportive. (To Rachel) (Starts to cry) You were so great. You made it so easy. And now you have to leave. And I have to live with a boy!! (They both break down in tears.)
Ross: Uh uh... well, her Internet Company went under and she lost an ear in a boating accident...
(The teacher smiles, but her eyebrows go up. Susan and Carol pat each other affectionately.)
Phoebe: David! (He kisses her cheek) What-what are you doing here? Arent you supposed to be in Russia?
Phoebe: (Screaming incoherently.) Get in here!!! (Motions to join her and Rachel.)
Rachel: Well yknow what? I hope Monica forgives you after you throw her, her vegetarian, voodoo, goddess circley shower! (Runs out.)
(Rachel slowly walks in from her bedroom. She is stunned speechless.)
Rachel: Me either. Umm, all right, first thing I need you to do is go downstairs and find a women named Hilda and tell her to go home.
Monica: Ohh! Did you do what I said? Did-did-did you tell her?
CHANDLER: Wow, that's lucky. What if her name was Big Ugly Splotch?
Joey: Oh, you have no idea. And-and when were on stage I get to-to kiss her and-and touch her, but then she goes home with the director, and its like somebodys ripping out my heart!
(He walks over to look and some clothes and Rachel quickly turns around and adjusts her bra, trying to show off her assets.)
Dr. Green: Come on! Youre just titling! (to Ross) Her legs are fine!
Joey: No, I do six things! First, I look deep in her eyes. Then, I kiss her. Next I take my hand and I softly graze her thigh.
Ross: (leaning into the recorder as well) Who just lost the respect of her unborn child.
ROSS: Julie, can you hold this for a second, thanks. [hands her a bowl and kisses her]
Phoebe: Well okay but I have two tickets to the ballroom dance finals. (She holds up the tickets that Kyle gave her.)
Joey: Right!(he starts to ape her)"Oh my God, is this the men's room? Oh, I feel so foolish, have you always known you wanted to be an actor?" (he inclines his head as if to look at a man's private parts)
Joey and Ross: Oh, yeah. Yeah. Let her dangle.
Ross: Oh, I just thought we could go out to dinner, and then maybe bring her back to my place and I'd introduce her to my monkey.
Joey: Well, Estelle tried, you know. The casting director told her that I missed my chance.
Phoebe: Lets see. (Looking at the picture) Oh my God! Oh But no! No! You cant-you cant hire him, because thatits not professional. Umm, this is for me (The picture) yes? Thanks. (Puts it in her pocket.)
Phoebe: Why?! Whats happening to the coffee house?! (Monica looks at her.) Oh! (Realizes.)
Phoebe: Oh, I love you guys too, but Mike got off work early. Wait. Wait, I�m not t�not that kind of girl that just ditches her friends to be with her boyfriend. You know what? I am. Bye guys! (waves to the bar) Judy! Bye.
Chandler: Oh no nonononononnononono, don't go.. (He kisses her and pulls her back down.)
Joey: Pickle? Pickles make her sick. Giving her pickles is like giving me salad.
Ross: (chasing her, trying to zip up his pants. His got them on right now.) No, wait! Emily! No, wait, stop! Emily, please(He catches something important in the zipper and howls like a little boy and falls to the floor.)
(Joey walks in and sees Ross and Charlie kissing. He gives a faint, rueful smile, then he seems to recollect something and suddenly he moves back to Rachel's room. He knocks on her door and she opens)
Ross: It was soo not an accident. She saw I was about to tag her, so she threw her big fat grandma arm elbow right into my face. And just keep running.
Joey: No man, that's huge! Now, I know I can stand to be around her, which means I get to hang out with you, which is kinda the whole point, anyway.
Chandler: (sees her foot is in a slush puddle) Op, foot in a puddle, foot all in a puddle.
Ross: Okay. (He sits her down in a chair.) Uh, Ross and Rachel. Rachel and Ross. Thats been one heck of a see-saw hasnt it?
[Scene: Rachel's job interview, she is waiting outside Mr. Zelner's (the interviewer) office banging her pen between her teeth.]
[Scene: Rachels Doctors Office, she is waiting for her doctor as a nurse enters.]