words in movies
Phoebe: Yes, it was! It was him! Uh huh! (they all stare at her) Okay, it was me!
Phoebe: Well, it was just, it was all so crazy, you know. I mean, Chandler was in the closet, counting to 10, and he was up to 7 and I hadn't found a place to hide yet. I-I-I meant to tell you, and I wrote it all down on my hand. See, all of it. (shows him her hand)
Joey: Well, Estelle tried, you know. The casting director told her that I missed my chance.
Phoebe: That is unfair. I'll call her and tell her it was totally my fault.
Phoebe: (on phone) 'Annie! Hi. Listen we got a problem with Joey Tribbiani, apparently he missed his audition. Who did you speak to in my office? Estelle, no, I don't know what I'm going to do with her. No. All right, so your husband leaves and burns down the apartment, the world does not stop.'
Phoebe: (on phone) 'Right, well look, um, if Joey loses this audition, that is it for Estelle. I don't care! Annie you are a doll, what time can you see him?' (to Monica) I need a pen. (Chandler hands her one, but she needs something to right on, so she tilts Chandler's head over and writes on the back of his neck)
Rachel: Ross, you are so pathetic. Why can't your son just play with his doll? (uses the Milk Master 2000 to pour milk into her cereal)
Monica: (entering from her bedroom) I gotta go to work. Has anybody seen my left boob?
Chandler: Just do it! Okay, it's Janice and if I get it I'm going to have to see her tonight. (phone stops ringing) Oh, that's great I'm gonna have to see her tonight.
Chandler: Okay, last night at dinner, when the meals came, she put half her chicken piccata on my plate and took my tomatoes.
Chandler: I know, that, (looks at her fake chest, and loses his train of thought, temporarily) that's why I don't want to go tonight, I'm afraid I'm going to say something stupid.
Phoebe: (on phone, in 'Katelynn's' voice) 'Hi, I have Phoebe Buffay returning a page. Okay, well, um, she's in her car I'll have to patch you through.'
Chandler: 'Cause, I wanted to uh, give you this. (hands her a present)
Chandler: Well, wait there's, there's more. See the contact paper is to go into your brand new drawer. (gives her a drawer) See, the drawer actually goes in my dresser.
Chandler: Oh, no, no, no, don't go! I've scared ya'! I've said too much! I'm hopeless, and awkward, and desperate for love!! (Janice leaves, Chandler then calls Janice to leave a message on her machine) Hey, Janice! It's me. Um, yeah, I-I-I just wanna apologize in advance for having chased you down the street. (runs out the door)
Chandler: So, I finally catch up to her and she says this relationship is going to fast and we have to slow down.
Chandler: Okay, okay. So, should I call her?
Rachel: This is a very critical time right now. If you feel yourself reaching for that phone, then you go shoe shopping, you get your butt in a bubble bath. You want her back you have to start acting aloof.
Rachel: Right. So, what you have to do is, you have to accidentally run into her on purpose. And then act aloof.
Chandler: So I'm not, not gonna lose her?
Chandler: I said, 'So I'm not gonna lose her?'
Joey: But Phoebe, wait! Wait! Phoebe. Phoebe! (catches her in the hallway)
[Scene: A grocery store that Janice shops in. Chandler is on purpose, accidentally bumping into her.]
Joey: Yeah, well don't get me wrong, you're a better agent than she is, but at least with her I don't want to blow my pretty dumb brains out.
Chandler: ....And then I just, you know, threw the bag of barley at her, and ran out of the store.
Monica: Oh wait, you know what, I got it, I got it, pretend like you just woke up, okay, that will throw her off. Be sleepy.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Carol and Susan are picking up Ben, while Monica is pouring chocolate syrup, lots of it, into her ice cream.]
Young Ross: (singing) 'I am Bea. I drink tea. Won't you dance around with....' (spills some tea and it drips onto his/her dress) Ohhh! (runs away crying)
Chandler: Hey, you have nothing but talk about her for the last 48 hours! If you were in a school yard youd be pulling her pigtails and pushing her down now!
Ross: She was blonde? (he looks surprised for a while, but then gets a "gotcha" expression on his face... There's knocking at the door.) Just a sec.! Okay, okay. This one's name is Sandy. She's got a degree in early childhood education, uhm... she worked for her last family for three years.
Chandler: Look, don't you see what's happening here. Instead of hitting on her right away, he's becoming her confidant. Now he's gonna be the guy she goes too to complain about you.
(Rachel is shocked, and holds her arms out in disbelief.)
Joeys Grandmother: Of course! Its her favorite.
Phoebe: Okay. (Starts running crazily with her arms flapping and her legs far apart) Come on! That's not running! Let's go! (Rachel pauses, then follows, embarrassed.)
MONICA: Who has her own little desk when Roland's not there.
Ross: I don't know, but when I spoke to her, she said she had already passed the mucus plug.
Ross: No, I-Im saying I liked her.
Monica: Sometimes I have bad dreams. (starts to break down, and Phoebe offers her, her hand to comfort her.)
(Sergei says something and leans in to kiss her, but just as hes about to....)
Ross: Well, Im gonna go see her. I want to bring her something, what do you think shell like?
Phoebe: (sits down next to her and hugs her) Oh no.
Phoebe: Oh Rach, good, listen isn't this perfect for me! (she's wearing another dress on a hanger around her neck)
Rachel: Oh, I cant watch this. (turns her eyes away)
[Ross comes out of Rachel's bedroom in her bathrobe and heads for the bathroom. On his way back, Richard comes out of Monica's bedroom in her bathrobe.]
Joey: And about this Nancy thing... If you're not sleeping with her, should I?
Phoebe: (points to herself) Phoebe. (points to her) Phoebe. Phoebe, yeah. She named me after you I guess.
Joey: All right, thats it. Y'know I was still gonna let you have her. But now, forget about it. Prepare to feel very bad about yourself.
Rachel: Well, I'll probably be back to pick her up around six, but she's in the bedroom all ready to go. But she did actually fall back to sleep, so...
Bonnie: Cool! Ill catch up! (She takes off her sweater.)
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, time lapse. Rachel is entering the living room from her bedroom as Monica enters.]
Phoebe: Well, shes out of town so, theres gotta be something in her house that tells me where my Father is.
Phoebe: You mean the one that my grandmother made me swear on her deathbed that I would never let out of our family?
Ross: She said you gave her the razor!
Rachel: (poking her head in from her bedroom) Uh, morning. Do you guys think you could close your eyes for just a sec?
Monica: Well, were trying to find someone to perform our wedding and theyre all either boring or annoying or yknow, cant stop staring at the ladies. (Points to her chest.)
(She throws her bag inside, and starts to climb through the window. She gets halfway in and the window slams shut on her butt.)
Joey: Oh Monica. (goes over and hugs her, then looks at the form and stops hugging her.) Wow, this guy's an astronaut. That would've been cool, (sees Monica) for like a day. (hugs her again).
GUY: Alright, fine. [on the phone] I'll call you back. [hands the phone to her]
[Scene: Central Perk, Rachel is serving her last cup of coffee.]
Phoebe: No, I-I mean your-your old best friend, here. (hands her the picture) Lily, from high school. Remember?
(She goes over to the snack table, and Joey quickly runs over and pours her a cup of coffee.)
Bonnie: (coming back from her swim) Hey!
[Scene: The Moondance Diner, Rachel is talking to Monica about her job.]
(Brenda pulls a chair to the counter and uses it to get up on the counter in order to clean the top of the cabinets. Monica sneaks over, bends over, and tries to see the stain. That doesnt work so she sticks her head between Brendas legs. Suddenly Brenda changes her stance and traps Monicas head between her legs.)
[cut to Monica opening the door of the beach house, with Chandler trying to pick her up for a date.]
Vince: (to Phoebe) Look, I gotta go. I'm on call tonight. (kisses her) See you Saturday. (leaves)
Ross: Ah y'know, this building is on my paper route so I... (gives her a flower)
Rachel: (throws her stuff down) I was gonna give you a chance to apologise to me.
[Scene: Phoebe Sr.s house, its right after she told Phoebe that shes her birth mother.]
Ross: Yes, yes I am, one of the many things Im feeling. Well.... (picks up her coat)
Past Life Phoebe: More bandages! More bandages! Please, can I get some more bandages in here! This man is dying(She is cut off by an exploding shell just outside the tent. When the smoke clears, she's missing an arm and the blood is pumping out like you'd see in a horror movie. And upon seeing her condition, she says ) Oh no.
-Cuts to Monica (She's just arrived outside his room she fixes a bent photo hanging on the wall then sprays mint in her mouth and enter)
Phoebe: Okay, Im gonna put this (her suitcase) in the car.
(Monica screams, throws the mouse down, and rubs her hands on Rosss sweater to clean them.)
Phoebe: (shocked) You know her?!
Ursula: No, I umm, I read about her in Moms suicide note.
Ursula: (disgusted) Hang on. (She goes into her apartment and slams the door in Phoebes face.)
Phoebe: Oh. (takes her beeper puts in a pot, covers it, and puts the pot in the oven)
(Joey hands her the cheese without looking at her.)
(Rachel brightly limps back across the apartment with glasses of wine for the cute doctors, leaving an open-mouthed Monica in her wake.)
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's apartment. Monica enters her bedroom with a roll of duct tape. Richard is sitting on the bed.]
Rachel: Come on Phoebe, look at that! They are not breaking up, look at them. Okay thats, you know what that is? That is a, that is a second date, thats what that is! Look at that, she just put her hand on his thigh...
Rachel: Oh, you go out with him. (goes over and hugs her)
Ross: Monica and I have a grandmother who died, you both went to her funeral, name that grandmother!
Rachel: Do we have to tell her?
Ross: Yes, we have to tell her!
Monica: Oh, but its made her so happy.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, the next morning, Ross, Phoebe, Chandler and Monica sit round the coffee table, playing Scrabble. Rachel, still in her dressing gown, is pleading on the phone, her free hand shaking with agitation.]
Chip: No, I think its cute. (kisses her)
Joey: (voice-over) Oh-oh! And then Rosss new girlfriend, Bonnie, shows up and Rachel convinced her to save her head. And then Ross and Rachel kiss, and now Ross has to choose between Rachel and the bald girl and I dont know what happened there either...
Ross: Happy for you. (He punches her back.)
Rachel: Im sorry, sweetie. (shows her the flyer)
Monica: Hey, we can take her back with you if you want.
Rachel: You could.... say youre sorry to her mom.
[Scene: Backstage at Joeys play, Joey is changing for the next scene as Kate arrives, carrying her bags.]
Phoebe: Well, you're not, (she tries to smile and contain her anger, but loses it) You're not... you're not... again, you're not SPEAKING FRENCH!
Monica: Oh yeah, she didnt hire me out of pity, it wasnt so she could pick on me in front of her friends, she actually thinks Im good.
Monica: (Looks at her nails) Oh my God. Wait a minute, I had them put (realises) Oh my God! Its in the quiche! Oh My God!
(She starts to walk very slowly toward the front of the room. The teacher grabs her hand and pulls her. Suddenly a woman bursts in)
Joanna: (locking her door) Oh.
Chandler: Oh. (Goes and gets Phoebes book as Rachel comes in from her room.)
Rachel: You promised you would break up with her!
[Cut to Rachels office as her intercom buzzes.]
Chandler: I did break up with her! She just took it really, really well!
Monica: I'm making cookies for Erica. And oh, by the way, we have to leave for the airport soon, her plane comes in about an hour.
Rachel: Oh wow. Why dont we just take me (Grabs her pin) and put me with a Manhattan in my hand, talking to the cute bartender. (Puts her pin at the bar and laughs. Monica just glares at her.) These pins arent for playing are they?
Joey: Relax. Here hold this (hands her his beer). This old stuff just comes right off. (he bends down to try and lift some tile right in the middle of the floor, in his tight pants.)
(Joey grabs her and kisses her.)
Chandler: It was working until you showed up, you big tree! I mean, this isnt fair. You had your chance with her! You had your chance and you blew it! And this is my chance and I am not going to blow it because we are meant for each other! And this is all just been one stupid mistake! (Sits down heavily.) I was gonna propose tonight.
Chandler: (to Rachel) I love you. (Kisses her on the forehead)
Joanna: (from her office) Whos out there?
Monica: Have you ever taken out the trash? (Hands her the garbage.)
Ross: So youre strong enough to face her on your own?
Phoebe: Hello handsome. (Sees Ursula over her shoulder) Oh God. (Walks away in shame as they kiss.) Oh look at you two. So when did you guys meet?
[Cut to into the bedroom, with Monica still hiding under the covers. Richard enters and sits down next to her.]
Rick: (looking at her feet) Wow, you have really pretty feet.
[Cut to Joey and Rachel's, its actually Joey and Rachels. Phoebe is trying to convince Rachel to switch with her and live with Monica as Joey looks on.]
Joey: Yeah, I guess it is. (sees Kate is watching, he turns Lauren so that he can talk directly to Kate, but still look like he is talking to Lauren) Listen, I ah, I gotta say good bye, and-and I gotta say it quick cause this is killing me. One thing you gotta know, is that I will never forget you. But, youve got things you have to do now, and so do I. And so Im gonna get on this spaceship, (smoke starts pouring in from the ceiling, and a ladder comes down, with flashing, colored lights on the side of it) and Im gonna go to Blargon 7 in search of alternative fuels. But when I return, 200 years from now, youll be long gone. But I wont have aged at all. (gets on the ladder) So you tell your great-great-granddaughter to look me up, because Adrienne, baby, Im gonna want to meet her.
Chip: Amy Welch? Wow! I havent seen her since... So, Monica about ready?
Dr. Long: (To Joey) Uh, if you have any questions, heres some information on Braxton-Hicks. (Hands Joey a pamphlet.) Oh and by the way, you did the right thing by bringing her in. Youre gonna make a wonderful father.
Phoebe: Yes, I will tell her.
Phoebe: Oh. (She goes to work, and her head slowly drops out of view.)
Jason: I was passin by and I saw that you were playing tonight, its kinda cool seeing you up there. (kisses her)
Chandler: But you did like us. And you should. My wife's an incredible woman. She's loving and devoted and caring. And don't tell her I said this but the woman's always right... I love my wife more than anything in this world. And I... It kills me that I can't give her a baby... I really want a kid. And when that day finally comes, I'll learn how to be a good dad. But my wife... she's already there. She's a mother... without a baby... Please?
Rachel: Thank you. (She goes to take off her make-up and screams in pain) Oww!!!! God!
Monica: Just go up to her and ask her out. (Chandler laughs) Oh, what's the worst thing that could happen?
ROSS: No, there is no way he was a velociraptor. No Tony, look at the cranial ridge, OK. If Dino was a velociraptor, he would have eaten the Flintstones. Yeah, yeah. [Monica comes out of her room] Oh, were you takin' a nap?
RACHEL: Oh, by the way Mon, I don't think the mailman liked your cookies. Here are the ornaments your mom sent. [hands her a smashed box]