words in movies
Phoebe: Oh... Mike's sister just invited me to a party tonight, he's gonna be there. And she was like "Oh, don't worry! I asked him. He's totally ok with seeing you!". So now I have to go so he'll think that I'm totally ok with seeing him!
Rachel: Which you're not, because you've totally hung up on him!
Rachel: And you're gonna want him to eat his heart out so you're gonna have to look fabulous!
Chandler: Is that a hint? Because we love you Doctor Connelly but we don't think we'd want you to be our child! (Dr. Connelly glares at him) Wow, talking about an inhospitable environment!
Ross: Professor Sherman, yeah. I've a meeting with him today.
Ross: Yeah, well... I think I know how to dazzle him.
Phoebe: No, I know, this way when I go to the party later Mike will know I am over him cause I'm gonna smell like another guy. (to the shop assistant) Yeah.
Rachel: Shhhhh! Phoebe! All right, look. I have a little thing for him.
Phoebe: Uh, wow! Isn't it ironic that he liked you and now you like him?
Monica: Chandler, this is crazy! What did you even say to him! "Come up, meet my wife! Give us your sperm"!
Chandler: No, I invited him to dinner so you could get a chance to get to know him! I mean, if we go through a sperm bank you never meet the guy, get to check him out.
Monica: I'm not going to be a part of this! You can't just bring some random guy at home and expect him to be our sperm donor!
Ross: What am I supposed to do? He's out cold! In fact he was just talking in his sleep before and evidently he wants someone named Fran to spank him harder.
Joey: Well, just wake him up!
Ross: I can't! If he realizes that I'm the one that put him to sleep, I won't get the job!
Zack: Oh! I'm gonna go wash up first. (Chandler points him the bathroom) Thanks!
Chandler: You don't like him.
Monica: I think he is fine! It's just that we don't know anything real about him... we should get more information.
(Ross takes his suitcase and tries to get out but ends up falling on Prof. Sherman's laps, thereby waking him up)
Ross: (To the still half asleep Professor) Oh my God! You really want me to be the keynote speaker? Thank you! (hugs him whilst still on his lap)
Prof. Sherman: (confused) You're welcome. (Ross hugs him again)
Phoebe: Mike knows I'm coming, and if I don't show up he'll think it's because of him! And I don't want to lose face! That's a very serious thing in my culture.
Chandler: Yeah, you think so, well? Should I ask him?
Monica: No, that's not it. It's just that when we were asking him all those questions before, I just... I just realized I don't care if he's the most perfect guy in the world... he's not you.
Monica: No, he's not. And if I can't get pregnant with you, then I don't want to get pregnant by... him or anyone else.
Jeanette: (to Zack) Here are the boards for Friday's pitch (hands him something).
Rachel: Oh thank you so much. (Picks up the guy's spirit level) Oh oh wait! You forgot your erm...Your game. (hands it to him)
Charlie: Oh my God! Did you talk to him?
Chandler: (slaps him on the shoulder) Nice! (goes to Monica)
Monica: What are you serious? You wanna marry him? Wha... What about Mike?
(Phoebe and Rachel both pause, look at each other, and go press their breasts against him. Which Joey doesnt mind, of course.)
Joey: (throws down a small wad of money, and as his hand twin starts to unfold it, Joey once again brings attention to their special gift to the world. {Y'know, looking at it now, they really don't have that similar of hands. Joey's are bigger.}) Ooh-ho-ho! (The dealer stares at him and he stops.)
Monica: No, I called him. It's not gonna happen.
(The doctor hands the boy to the nurse, and she walks over to another part of the room with him.)
Monica: Please, don't listen to Joey, okay. Would you look at him? He-hes obviously depressed. He's away from his family; he's spending Thanksgiving with strangers. What he needs right now is for you to be his friend.
Phoebe: (smiles at him happily for a few seconds before answering) No!
Monica: I know (she snuggles to him)
Ross: Uh-ha, what about someone who looks like Rachel? (Russell glares at him.) I will think about the therapy.
Rachel: We have to have a surprise Bon Voyage party for Emily. But its actually for Joshua. (Starts handing out party hats.) Look, he said hes not ready to date, so I had to invite him to a party if I wanted to see him outside of work, and now I have the perfect opportunity to seduce him! (Hands Ross a party hat.)
Chandler: (to the one sitting next to him) Really?
Rachel: (gasps) Oh my God! Listen to you talkin about having kids. Oh my Joey. (She goes over and hugs him.) Oh, please dont get married before I do.
Ross: Hey! (she turns to him) Well...? (in expectation)
Phoebe: He is sweet. Hes too sweet. He calls me all the time. (Mimicking him) "So did-did you get home from work okay?" "Did-did you get out of the shower okay?"
(Chandler turns to Mike and gives him a "See what I mean?" look)
Chandler: (to Phoebe) Did you know this about him?
Chandler: Honey, try to focus the trash talk on him!
Ross: Okay. Well, apparently Chandlers angry at us for not getting him a ticket to that Knicks game a couple of weeks ago.
Rachel: Oh yes, of course, I remember him!
Joey: Rachel... let's be clear on this, ok? I do not love Hugsy. I like him a normal amount...
Chandler: (to Phoebe) Do you really find this attractive on him?
Monica: (kneels with him) Chandler, umm, I want you to take just a minute and I want you to think about how ridiculous this sounds.
Mike: And that's how it's done! (Phoebe kisses him)
Joey: No-no-no! We gotta go! Come on! (Joey picks him up in a firemans carry and carries him out.) Here we go.
Ross: I knew that was him!
Monica: No, I have just to have two more points to beat him!
Dr. Green: Oh come on! Dont be such a baby! (Goes after him)
Monica: Wait a minute, I think Phoebe's right. You know I hear someone else in there with him.
Joey: Well, I only said that because of Ross, you know. Then I saw him kissing Charlie...
Chandler: We share a wall! So either hes great in bed, or she just likes to agree with him a lot.
Ross: Well, if you see him could you please tell him I'm looking for him?
Mrs. Tribbiani: Do you remember how your father used to be? Always yelling, always yelling nothing made him happy, nothing made him happy, not that wood shop, not those stupid little ships in the bottle, nothing. Now he's happy! I mean, it's nice, he has a hobby.
Ross: You know, I gotta go find him. He's gotta be here someplace.
Rachel: Joey, you cant let him get away with that. Ya know what, Im not going to let him get away with that. Im going to say something to himNo, I really shouldnt say anythingNo, I should say something to him. (Goes to the counter) Gunther, I want you to give Joey his job back. That is really not fair that you have to fire him
Charlie: Yeah, can you guys just throw him in the pool later?
Rachel: (still can't find him) How are you doing this?
Ross: Uh, no... no. I couldn't find him. I'm just gonna talk to him on the plane.
(Everybody stands up and applauds. Ross looks flattered and surprised. His friends and other members of the audience go to congratulate him)
(Rachel, Joey and Chandler pat him on his shoulders and walk off, together with Monica)
Precious: Oh, my God, maybe you're right. Maybe I don't need him. I deserve to be treated with respect.
(she slaps him in the face, Mike looks like he doesn't believe what just happened. Precious leaves, and he turns to Phoebe.)
(Ross smiles slightly.� Then he gives a single nod that lifts him to his feet.� He exits the coffee shop.
(Rachel looks at him.)
Joey: (waving) Very funny Ross! Very life-like and funny. Okay. (Notices that a woman is waving back.) Oh no-no-no, I wasn't waving at you lady. (She just stares at him.) (Joey sees how beautiful she is.) Whoa, maybe I was! Hey, Monica, this totally hot girl in Ross's building is flirting with me.
(Monica glares at him.)
MIKE: I'll get it.� (He lunges across Ross's lap on the sofa to reach the phone.� Ross stares at him with wide eyes.)� Hello?� Ross's place.� Mike speaking.� (pause.� Hands phone to Ross)� It's for you.
Phoebe: Really? Theres nothing sexual about this? (Sexily) Oooh. Oo God! Ohh. Ohhhh. Ohh. (Some cute guy is watching closely.) (To him) What are you looking at?! (Pause) I mean hi.
(Monica looks at him.)
Colleen: I would have told him to do it too.
Colleen: You told him he's adopted?
Joey: Alright!! Fine! It's original Hugsy! No, now I know that Emma wants him but he's mine and I need him..
LIPSON: I'm sorry. Look, I know this can't bring him back but here, it's just a gesture.
(The triplets stare at him.)
(Cut to the hall. Owen is wearing his scout-uniform and is looking through a box when Chandler walks up to him.)
Phoebe: (Also gets up and starts taking her purse) Oh my God. Was Mike with him?
Joey: Uh! (When she's done she throws her bra at him)
Joey: Your thumb? Thats weird. (Makes a fist.) You sure youre punching right? Make a fist. (Ross just looks at him with his thumb in a cast.) Maybe later. Ross I feel terrible.
Joey: Okay, Im all right, okay, but hey, could you just leave your lips? (She kisses him on the cheek and starts to leave.)
Ross: Take thee, (Glares at the Minister) Emily. (Chuckles) Like thered be anybody else. (Emily is glaring at him.)
"Went to the store, sat on Santa's lap. Asked him to bring my friends all kinds of crap. Said all you need is to write them a song. Now, you haven't heard it yet, so don't try to sing along. No, don't sing along.
Rachel: Yes, I know that. I know that. And I know that hiring him was probably not the smartest thing that Ive ever done. But Im telling you, from this moment on I swear this is strictly professional. (Theres a knock on the door.) Yes?
Ross: Well, do you wanna marry him?
(Ross chokes up and pauses. Rachel and Joey look at him.)
Monica: Maybe you don't need him to propose to you, maybe you can propose to him!
Ross: (sees how strangely Monica, Chandler and Rachel are looking at him) What?
(She takes it out of her mouth and hands it to him as Monica returns from her room and this time forcing Chandler to put the ring in his mouth.)
Chandler: She's right! If I were a guy and... (stops himself mid-sentence...everyone stares at him) Did I just say if I were a guy..?
Rachel: Okay, first of all, if you keep calling it that, no one's gonna ever take it. Then, second of all you're not actually gonna have sex with him! You're just gonna make him think that you are.
Charlie: (glances over Ross' shoulder) Sorry, looks like it's just him.
Charlie: Yes, absolutely. I'll call him.
Monica: Absolutely! Yes, you say to him "I'm sorry Mike I can't live without her, she means too much to me!"
Ross: Ok, now, is there anything I can do to... you know, butter him up? Anything he really likes?
Chandler: (Hands the tape back to him) I'm sorry man.
(Completely undone by Monica's verbal destruction, Rachel almost loses her balance as she staggers backwards, eyes agog, gasping for breath, and literally not knowing which way to turn. Finally, she escapes into the bathroom while a resigned Dr. Mitchell looks philosophically at Dr. Rosen who seems about remind him of the good old days at the pagan altar.)
Rachel: Well, I did my best to convince him that Im not some crazy girl who is dying to get marriedIm just going through a hard time.
Ross: (Yells) Damnit! (Goes to the door to leave. Rachel just enters, sees him and starts laughing)
Chandler: Id like to toast, Ross and Emily. Of course, my big toast will be tomorrow at the wedding, so this is kind of my little toast or Melba toast, if you will. (No one in the room laughs. He starts to get flustered.) Okay. I known Ross for a long time. In fact, I knew him when he was going out with his first girlfriend. (Ross looks embarrassed.) And I thought things were going to work out for him..Until the day he over inflated her. (He laughs. Jack looks at Judy and no one in the room laughs.) Ohh, Dear God.. (A cellular phone rings.)
Chandler: Owen didn't know he was adopted, and Monica told him.
RACHEL: What, so you go over there, you tell him you think he's cute, what's the worst that could happen?
Ross: Hi! Yeah! Tommys in line for the bathroom and someone just cut in front of him, I think hes gonna snap. (Hes watching very intently)
Ross: Im sorry I had to take such drastic measures to make my point, but Ilook, I just want you guys to be safe. (Monica comes out to throw out the garbage and Ross screams ) DANGER!!!!! (She completely ignores him and keeps walking.) Ahhh, huh? Unagi.
Monica: You are so handsome! I wanna make love to you right here, right now! (Growls and pulls him into a kiss.)
Phoebe: (Lightly) Oh! It ended okay. One of my friends shot him.
Chandler: No no no! Look, Carol, can I call you Carol? (Pause) Wh-why would I when your name is Elaine? Oh what a great picture of your son, strapping! (She glares at him.) Thats a picture of your daughter, isnt it, well shes lovely. I like a girl with a strong jaw. Ill call you from Tulsa. (Exits.)
Monica: I don't know. I mean, you saw him do a love scene, so maybe you don't have a thing for Joey, maybe you have a thing for Drake.
Laura: So you're not friends with him?
Rachel: No! Wait no! Shut upI mean dont cry! Let me get my checkbook! (Grabs her checkbook and runs after him.)
Joey: Hey OK great, what would you do if I did this? (Swings to punch Chandler, he moves and he ends up punching Ross, knocking him off the stool. Ross then gets up and just stares at Joey.)
Katie: Aww, like I could hurt you. Are you making fun of my size? Don't make fun of me because of my size! (She punches him again and almost knocks him off the arm of the couch.)
Phoebe: I couldn't tell him no. He got so sad. Maybe it'll be all right. I do really like him a lot and probably do it eventually anyway and plus, think of all the money I'll save on stamps.
Laura: Are you friends with him?
Chandler: No! No! I dont want him to know were yet! Im not sure Im ready for that. And besides hes not gonna be too happy to see me either.
JOEY: Let me get this straight. He got you to beg to sleep with him, he got you to say he never has to call you again, and he got you thinking this was a great idea.
Monica: Yeah! Oh hes great, I love him. (Walks away and Chandler glares at Phoebe.)
[Scene: Joey's bedroom. Joey's asleep with Hugsy, the penguin right next to him.]
Joshua: Huh. (She starts brushing the lint off and checking him out in the mirror.) Yeah?
Ross: Dude, I wanted him to guess.