words in movies
MNCA: You were so amazing as the king. I was really impressed, I was.
ROSS: I don't want to.
JOEY: Maybe they do. I've been doin' this ten years and I haven't gotten anywhere. There's gotta be a reason.
JOEY: No, no, no, it.. it's too hard. It's not worth it. I quit.
MNCA: Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait one minute. Wait a minute. I believe this will change your mind. [Reads from paper] In a mediocre play, Joseph Tribbiana was able to achieve brilliant new levels of... continued on page 153...[turns it] sucking.
JOEY: When I was little, I wanted to be a veteranarian, but then I found out you had to put your hands into cows and stuff.
ROSS: Yeah, yeah, just a tough day at work. A stegosaurus fell over and trapped a kid. Whoa, whoa, I know this jacket, this is, th--Fun Bobby's jacket! Where is he, what. He, he's here, isn't he?
ROSS: Not at all! I love this guy. Hey, I was so psyched to hear you're back with my sister!
FBOB: Hey, so what'd I miss, what'd I miss, c'mon?
JOEY: Hey no, seriously, I don't need you to pick me... [Fun Bobby picks Joey up off the ground, bounces him. Joey laughs.] Alright! It still works.
FBOB: OK, now before I go, does anybody else need to be picked up? [everyone raises their hands] I'm still gonna go.
MNCA: Oh, isn't he? Oh, you know, I really think this time it may work with him. I mean, he just makes me feel so good and I've been feeling so lousy this last couple of months, no job, no boyfriend. Well, at least my cup is half full.
MNCA: Really? I only had two glasses.
JOEY: I just had a glass.
RACH: I had one glass.
CHAN: I had about a mugful in this lovely 'I got boned at the Museum of Natural History' mug.
ROSS: Yeah but, you know, now that I think about it, I don't think I've ever seen Fun Bobby without a... a drink in his hand.
PHOE: Yeah. Oh, OOOH, yeah, you know, did you notice how he always starts his stories with, um, OK, 'I was soooo wasted,' or, 'Oh, we were soooo bombed,' or, ummm, ooh, ooh, 'So I wake up, and I'm in this dumpster in Connecticut.'
MNCA: Well, we just happen to go to alot of places where you might drink. I mean, how do you go to a wine tasting without having a drink? Or... or to a club, or to the... zoo.
RACH: Ehhhummmm, I don't know, why don't you taste it.
FBOB: Well, I would make them Belgian, but the waffles are hard to get into that flask.
MNCA: Look, maybe this is none of my business, or maybe it is, I don't know... but, uh, I'm kind of worried about you.
FBOB: OK, look, this isn't the first time somebody's said something to me about this, but, I don't know... I always made excuses about it, like... uhhh... 'I'm just a social drinker,' or, 'C'mon, it's Flag Day.'
FBOB: I guess I'm saying, I'll try and quit. I kinda like that you worry about me. [they hug]
FBOB: I am gonna try and quit drinking.
CHAN: OK, I guess this is gonna seem kinda bittersweet now, but... Joey, that's who.
RACH: Ummmm.... well, actually I'm already done, but I...I kinda got plans.
RACH: Yeah... I, uhh... I have a... I have a date.
JOEY: What about Ross? I mean, are you still mad at him cause he made that list about you?
RACH: I don't know. Whatever I was feeling, I'm... not.
RACH: Oh, I know, I'm sorry you guys. You're just gonna have to get used to the fact that I will not be dating Ross.
JOEY: Well, I think it went pretty well. I.. I got a callback for Thursday.
JOEY: OK, uh.... listen, there's something I want to talk to you about. The network casting lady...
JOEY: Oh yeah, yeah, she's great, but... I kinda got the feeling that she was sort of... coming on to me. And I definitely would get the part if I would've... you know... if I would have sent the Little General in.
ESTL: Oh, I see. Well, I'm just gonna put in a call here and we'll find out what's goin' on and straighten it out. [picks up the phone] Yeah, hi, Lori please. [pause] Hi darling. So how 'bout Joey Tribbiani for the part of the cab driver, isn't he terrific? [pause] Uh-huuuuh. [pause] Uh-huuuuh. OK, doll. Talk to you later. [hangs up] [to Joey] Yeah, you're gonna have to sleep with her.
FBOB: I needed to buy a hammer the other night, and I'm out walkin' around the neighborhood but apparently there are no hardware stores open past midnight in the Village.
MNCA: But I'm gonna be there... for the rest of my life. I mean, I can't break up with him. I'm the one who made him quit drinking. He's dull because of me.
PHOE: Well, yeah, but... no. I mean, umm... doesn't.... doesn't Russ just remind you of someone?
PHOE: I, OK....
ROSS: Yes, yes I am. Are you a, uh, a friend of Rachel's?
ROSS: Yes, yes I am. And you are a....
ROSS: Well, I am going to, uh... get a beverage. It was nice, nice... uh... meeting you.
ROSS: I, uh, well... I... I met Russ.
ROSS: Hey, I didn't know we were, uh, seeing other people.
ROSS: See what? I don't know what she sees in... innn that goober. And it takes him, what? Like... like... I don't know, uhh... uhhh, hello.... a... week, to get out a sentence.
JOEY: Well, the part's mine if I want it.
JOEY: Ten years I've been waiting for a break like this Chandler, ten years! I mean, Days of Our Lives. That's actually on television.
JOEY: Well, I guess I could sleep with her... I mean, how could I do that?
CHAN: Well, I... I've got a pop-up book that told me everything I need to know.
JOEY: Yeah, she's totally good looking. I mean, if I met her in a bar, or something, I'd be buying her breakfast. [pause] You know, after having slept with her.
CHAN: Y'know, maybe this isn't such a big deal. Y'know, I mean, the way that I see it is you get a great job and you get to have sex. Y'know, I mean, throw in a tree and a fat guy and you've got Christmas.
JOEY: I just... I just don't think that I want it that way though, y'know? I mean, let's say I do make it, alright? I'm always gonna look back and wonder if it was because of my talent or because of.. y'know, the Little General.
JOEY: Yeah, but after Denise DeMarco, I had to promote it.
WAITER: Can I get you something from the bar?
MNCA: Yes, I would like something. [looks at Fun Bobby, changes her mind] No, no thank you.
MNCA: No, no really. I.. I wouldn't feel right about it. [to waiter] Just some water.
RACH: Phoebe, what the hell are you talking about? Other than their names being similar, I'm sorry, I do not see what you're seeing.
RUSS: I know what your problem is.
CHAN: No, I don't even think he knew. Hey, would you sleep with somebody to get a great job?
RACH: I don't know. Who would I have to sleep with?
RACH: Why would I have to sleep with you?
MNCA: Bobby and I are going away for the weekend, remember?
MNCA: Oh no no, this is not for him, this is for me. That way he's still sober but I find his stories about shoelaces much more amusing.
FBOB: Uh, can I talk to you a minute?
FBOB: I think you may have a drinking problem.
FBOB: Look, I am just not strong enough to be in a codependent relationship right now, OK?
FBOB: Well, anyway, I hope we can be friends.
CHAN: I'll take one. Sometimes I like to hold stuff like this and pretend I'm a giant.
JOEY: It was unbelievable! I walked in there and she was all over me.
JOEY: Well, I couldn't do it. I told her I didn't want to get the part that way.
JOEY: But wait, wait, wait. Then, after I left her office, she caught up with me at the elevator and offered me an even bigger part.
RUSS: I guess you guys heard, Rachel dumped me.
RUSS: Oh, all she said was that I remind her too much of somebody. You have any idea who she's talking about?
PHOE: Oh I do, it's.... it's Bob Saget. She hates him.
JULIE: Um, oh, I don't know. I mean, it's definitely weird not being with Ross, but I guess I'm doing OK. Actually I've got some of his stuff that he, um....
Joey: I think youre right.
Chandler: Wish it! (To the woman, Kathy, he likes) Hi. Hi, I-I was just sitting over there, and uhh, Chandler. My name is Chandler. Did I say that?
Joey: Matter of fact, I do.
Chandler: Can you believe it? I mean, don't I seem like somebody who should be doing something really cool? You know, I just always pictured myself doing something...something.
Ross: (quickly jumping away from Elizabeth) Yes, professor Feesen-sen-stenlger Ill be with you in one moment. (To Elizabeth) So, I will take one box of the Thin Mints. (And he ushers Elizabeth out of the office.)
Joey: I like it.
Phoebe: I just talked him into it, dont tell me I have to do you too. The puppet master gets tired people.
Rachel: What do you mean, you fold? Hey, come on! What is this? I thought that 'once the cards were dealt, I'm not a nice guy.' I mean, what, were you just full of it?
Rachel: I know. (They hug.) Oh-oh, wait did you hear that-hear that? Listen, Im gettin something from your grandmother, she said that since you get to keep the one bedroom apartment you should give Rachel the purple chair?
Joey: Listen, I know the invitation says 6:00, but does that mean that you want people to get there at six, or the show is gonna start right at six?
Joey: It was so stupid, I said some stuff in an interview that I shouldnt have said. But believe me, thats not gonna happen today.
Monica: I cant walk. Okay? Okay? These boots were a huge mistake!
Joey: Ill take those to go. (To the interviewer) For the kids.
The Interviewer: Oh, I know what I wanted to ask you. You were on the show years ago and then they killed you off. What happened there?
Chandler: Hey, by any chance did either of pick uh Rachel for your secret Santa, cause I wanna trade for her.
Phoebe: (to the squirrel) Okay, stop tormenting me! This mink! Okay, they're mean! And they hate squirrels! And y'know, okay, most of these probably wanted to be coats! (The squirrel stares at her.) All right, fine, now I get it. (To the clerk.) Here. (She hands him her coat.) You take it. (To the squirrel.) Are you happy now? I'm cold!
Joey: Well, I said that I (The gang jumps up and interrupts him.)
The Interviewer: Oh! I like that. Whats your name?
Monica: All right, look Im just gonna unplug it.
Rachel: Oh, please, Ross it was so obvious! It was like you were marking your territory. I mean you might have well have just come in and peed all around my desk!
Dina: Well, at least Im not a murderer! (Jessica slaps her.)
Phoebe: Umm, I I just think you dont expect someone so hot to be so sweet.
Joey: I know.
Rachel: Ive never lived like this before.
Hums While He Pees: Hey uh, I dont mean to be presumptuous but I have these two tickets to the ballroom dancing finals tomorrow night if you want to go?
Monica: Well, Ive tried everything. I give up. I guess Im not gonna be the mom who makes the worlds best chocolate cookies. I do make the best duck confit with broccoli rabe. Kids love that right.
Rachel: Oh Amy, don't cry Amy. Um.. Ross, could I talk to you in private?
Monica: Well, we-we had to go back because I forget my jacket.
Rachel: All right, now dont judge me. I normally wait until my date leaves, but you live here. Im ripping into this swan.
Monica: So I made snacks. Please, just hang out okay? Im just gonna rest my eyes just a little bit.
Joey: Id seen this thing on The Discovery Channel...
Joey: Nothing, Im just practicing blowing you off because Im gonna be a big movie star!
Monica: (entering) Did I miss it? (Phoebe nods no.) Rachel, I-I want you to know that, if its positive, were gonna
Joey: I think face to face.
Ross: I would say that.
Ross: Okay, here I go.
Mona: (interrupting him) Listen Ross, you dont have to apologize. I understand why you were there.
Ross: I prefer not to answer that right now, Im still carrying a little holiday weight.
Joey: Yknow, when we talked about face to face, I dont think we thought it all the way through.
Joey: No Im not. Why would you say that? Thats just mean.
Chandler: Now Ive upset you? What did I say?
Joey: Its not what you said. Its the way you said it Oh My God, Im a woman!!!
Rachel: Good. Although yknow, he-hes a private guy. Yknow, I wish I could get him to open up a little bit, share some feelings.
Phoebe: But Im a professional! And Im really good! Look, if youre uncomfortable we can stop. Just give me a chance, okay. Please?
Woman: Hi, is Rachel here? Im her sister.
Joey: I may have to, I hate to do it, but Im the star! Yknow? Theres a limit to how many sandwiches I can eat off the floor. (His cell phone rings) Excuse me. (Answers it, on phone) Joey Tribbiani.
Ross: Yeah, I'm gonna stay and read my book. I just wanna be alone right now.
Janine: I don't think so.
Joey: Not much to tell there Im really shy.
Rachel: Look I know she's a little tough to take. She has no where else to go, and she's my sister. Alright, she's Emma's aunt. And I would like them to bond.
Joey: Oh, I do. (Gives her the Joey-love look.) How you doin?
The Interviewer: (returning) Oh wait! I almost forgot. We have to ask everybody this. Other than Days of Our Lives, whats your favorite soap opera?
Joey: No, Yeeees. God, how do I say this. (walks into the kitchen, Chandler follows closely, he turns around and gets startled). Oh, hi, you know that girl from the Greek restaurant with the hair (holds his hands up to signify she has big hair)?
Ross: (looking then moving away quickly) Uh-huh! Uh-huh! And-and-and Ill always remember that summer because thats when I realized that we are related.
Joey: Oh, I dont watch soap operas. Excuse me, I have a life, yknow?
Ross: When we first met her, she was soaking, her feet were wet! Who wouldnt be miserable? Im telling you when I got her into a dry pair of shoes, she was a totally different person.
Joey: Yeah, I called the lady about that. I told her I was just joking. She was pretty nice about that.
Ross: Listen, if you ever have any problem with the ladies you know Ill help you out.
Chandler: But I didn't get to shape my belly like a bowl full of jelly.
Chandler: Yeah, and I don't wanna brag but a lot of the ideas were mine! (silence) Hell, you weren't there? All the ideas were mine!!!
Rachel: Please, make sure she comes. Its really important to me, I mean its my mom!
Rachel: Dr. Long, Ive been at this for seventeen hours! Three women have come and gone with their babies, you gotta give me some good news! How many centimeters am I dilated? Eight? Nine?
Rachel: I dont know.
Phoebe: Well I dont, I dont have a mother so often I forget that other people
Phoebe: I know. I know, whats her number?
Monica: Yeah, Im sorry. Im-Im so sorry.
Kash: Hey! How come I havent seen you here before?
Chandler: All right. I'll tell you what. When we're 40, if neither one of us are married, what do you say you and I get together and have one?
Mrs. Green: Well all right. Ill see you at four.
Joey: I said a little bit Ross. Now, how about you Chandler?
Phoebe: Hell yeah! Ill marry you! (She grabs the ring and puts it on.)
Joey: No! Hey no! This is wrong you guys! Phoebes our friend! Well, Im not gonna watch it!
Phoebe: Im so glad you could make it.
Joey: I know! Yeah, but, look I can handle it. All right? Look, I can listen to the radio, huh? And Ross gave me this great book (holds up the Playboy magazine).
Ross: Its not that. Okay? Annulments are more complicated than I
Rachel: Oh well actually gonna use a nanny and uh, I dont even have a housekeeper.
Ross: Ok, fine, but I don't want them bonding to much. I don't want her telling Emma she needs a nose job.
Monica: (Robin is speaking loudly again) I...
Rachel: Yes. Yes I do.
Ross: Its okay, Im ready.
Phoebe: Yeah I know. Isnt it great? One less person we have to make small talk with.
Rachel: Well, however great she was I just cant afford that.
Chandler: Oh God, it freaked me out. Okay, I know it shouldnt have, but it did. I mean I like her, I dont want to stop seeing her, but every so often its like Hey, y'know what, wheres your leg? I mean Im the smallest person in the world arent I? Im the smallest person in the world.
Chandler: Let me think. Let me thinkOh! I dont care.
Chandler: Oh come on Ross, I think were all losers here.
Chandler: Ill take a card.
Ross: (exiting the bathroom) That-that-thats all right, no honey, you take your time sweetie. Ill be right out here. (She slams the door in his face, to the gang) Shes just fixing her makeup.
Joey: Look, come on you guys, you said you were gonna try! All right look, I came over here to invite you guys to a movie with me and Janine.
Rachel: What? You guys, come on! What am I going to do?
{Transcibers note: Ill finish that one for those of you who dont know what theyre talking about. Where the towels are Hers and Hers and His, Threes Company too! Yeah, thats the theme song for Threes Company.}
Rachel: Oh yeah. Okay, see mom, the truth is I can do this on my own.
Phoebe: Anyway, I just wanted to say thank you, it was just, it was so sweet. (She goes to hug them and they both flinch, thinking that Phoebe is about to attack them.)
Rachel: Well, yeah, yknow how Ross and I were on again, off again, on again, off again? I guess I just figured that somewhere down the road, we would be on again.
Chandler: Because that's who I am, okay? I'm sure a mature man like Richard could see a tape like that and it wouldn't bother him. Just'd be another saucy anecdote for him to share at his men's club over brandy and moustaches.
Ross: Id like to spin the wheel!
Ross: Shut up! I Dream of Genie!
Phoebe: Really?! Oh thats so exciting! Thank you! Thanks Mon! Oh but Mon, if you touch my guitar again Ill have to pound on you for a little bit.
Mrs. Green: Im going to the bathroom.
Mrs. Green: Of course I am!
Rachel: So umm, youre gonna stay with me as long as I need you?