words in movies
Chandler: What did I marry into?
Monica: Oh, I can't. We're throwing Phoebe a bachelorette party.
Ross: Oh, and Chandler and I have this stupid college alumni thing. I can't believe you get to meet Donny Osmond.
Monica: Ross and I always wanted to be Donny and Marie.
Rachel: Oh God, that's right. I blocked that out.
Chandler: (looking around) Did I go to this school?
Ross: Hey, I hear she's single again, d'you think I should ask her out?
Ross: Hey. Hey, check out the flyers for the band. I made 'em on a Macintosh in the computer room!
Chandler: I know it. You know, I'm totally gonna ask her out.
Ross: Dude, I was gonna ask her out.
Chandler: I said it first, bro.
Ross: Well, I thought it first, Holmes.
Ross: Woha! Wait... What are we doing? What we have is too important to mess it up over some girl. I mean, we can get laid anytime we want.
Chandler: Totally. I had sex in High school...
Chandler: Well, I officially give you permission to break the pact.
Ross: Thank you. (they shake hands) All right, here I go. Hey, remember how scary it used to be going up to girls in college?
Ross: I know, and I can't stop sweating. (he walks towards Missy)
Joey: (to Gene) I know it could be intimidating for regular people to be around celebrities but... relax, I'm just like you! (pause) Only better looking and richer.
Joey: (on the screen there's the word "Supermarket") Uhm... ok. It's a store, like a supermarket. (there is a sound indicating he made a mistake as he shouldn't have said 'supermarket'. The next word appears, "notebook") Oh! I see-I see what I did. Yeah, ok, ok, uhm... I'm writing in my...
Joey: Noo, (whispering) more like a notebook... Damn it! (next word appears: "blueprint") Oh, if I'm building an house, the plan isn't called the 'shmoo-print'... Can't say that either? Woha... hey... (the last word is "Football field" and there are 5 seconds left) In high school, I once had sex with a girl right in the middle of the...
Rachel: Pheebs, I... there isn't gonna be any flying about! We actually thought we were a little too mature for stuff like that.
Phoebe: Oh, ok. I see what you're doing, that's fine. This is all there is, just tea, uh, ok. (she drinks her tea) Hmmmm... raunchy!
Phoebe: Really? So this is... this is my big send off in the married life? Rachel this is the only bachelorette party I'm ever gonna have! I've got a big wad of ones in my purse! Really? I mean, really? It's just tea?
Rachel: Nooo! Phoebe, of course there is more! I mean, I'll just go and talk to Monica and get an ETA on the pee-pee's!
Donny: Now Gene I must remind you, you need all six of these to stay in the game, all right? Describe for Joey things you find in your refrigerator.
Gene: Hey! I got a kid starting college. I've to get surgery on my knee, you just lost me ten grand!
Joey: Oh, wow! I'm so sorry, ok? I promise, we'll do better next time!
Gene: Well, I will, because I won't be playing with you.
Ross: That's ok. Uh, anyway, well he and I both really liked you a lot, uhm, but we didn't want anything to jeopardize our friendship, so we kinda made a pact, that neither of us could ask you out!
Missy: Well, Chandler and I used to make out! A lot!
Roy: Ooh, boy. You should warn people there's no elevator! I should not have had that Mexican food for lunch.
Phoebe: Oh God no, I don't wanna see him take his clothes off!
Monica: Oh, no! I mean, obviously we want to see you take your clothes off! You big piece of eye candy!
Roy: Ok, ok, ladies! Can I have your attention, please? (pause) Did someone call for the long arm of the law? (He extends his arm from around his crotch and then upward and outward, towards Phoebe) I should warn you, I have a concealed weapon! (Puts his hands over his crotch) I hope you're familiar with the States penal code, ok, ok, enough teasing. Now for some pleasing!
Phoebe: This is how I look when I'm turned on!
Roy: You were talking about me before! Look, I don't need this! I'm outta here! Where's my hat? (goes to get it) Look, I've been in this business for a long time!
Roy: Didn't do anything? I took a bus all the way from Hoboken. I climbed ... I dunno... like a billion stairs... It's not like I can take them two at a time!
Phoebe: I don't care. We're not paying you 300 dollars for this.
Phoebe: Oh yeah, okay. I'm uptight. Yeah, that's why I don't want to watch a middle aged guy dance around in what I can only assume is a child halloween costume! (turns to look at Monica and Rachel who look like they feel very sorry for the stripper)
Roy: I may have borrowed this from my nephew, but let me assure you, what's underneath (points at his groin)... is all man.
Joey: (To Henrietta) My friend Rachel has a kid. I totally know nursery rhymes! (makes a thumbs up sign)
Chandler: I believe the foundation of our friendship was unfortunate hair. (Ross just stares at him) All right, look, if we're really gonna do this... it's not like you never broke one of the pacts.
Ross: I didn't.
Ross: I never did anything with Adrienne Turner.
Chandler: Oh please, and you knew how much I liked her.
Ross: I don't know what... you're talking about.
Present Chandler's voice: Remember that big party? Freshman year? A week before Christmas vacation? I do. You had some visitors.
Monica: I can't believe we are at a real college party! (Rachel laughs excitedly) I have to pee so bad!
Rachel: I know. But if some guy who looks like Corey Haim wants to kiss me tonight, I'm sooo gonna let them! (They spot Chandler)
Monica: I KNOW!
Chandler: O-kay. I'll see if I can find Ross. (Goes off to find Ross.)
Adrienne: Oh believe me, Ross, I won't be telling anybody about this.
Ross: I didn't know you knew about that.
Chandler: Well, I did and it hurt. (they walk towards the bar) That's when I wrote the song: "Betrayal In The Common Room".
Ross: (looks disappointed in himself) Man... I... I'm sorry.
Ross: So, eh. I made out with Adrienne and you made out with Missy. Well I guess we're even.
Chandler: (sighs) Just one more thing. I was so pissed at you that night that I wanted to get back at you. So I thought, who does Ross like the more than anybody?
Rachel: I am sooo drunk.
Monica: That's weird. I've had the same number of beers as you and I don't feel anything at all. (Chandler approaches)
Rachel: (finishing the last of her drink) I am soo not going to do good on my SATs tomorrow.
Rachel: (sarcastic) Oh yeah. There is a plan! Why don't I just start taking my smart pills now?
Rachel: Oh well, You know, I think it's kinda really important that I go somewhere where there's sun, so I'm sort of... (Chandler leans in an kisses her) (She pulls away) Hey!
Roy: No, no, you're right. Who am I kidding? I should have hung up that breakaway jockstrap years ago. What am I gonna do? I mean, this has been my life for thirty two years. Taking my clothes off in front of people is all I know.
Rachel: No, wait. No there's gotta be something else that you can do. I mean, what skills do you have?
Roy: I don't know... I can make my pecs dance... I can pick up a dollar bill with my butt cheeks... I can go to that special place inside me where I feel no shame.
Roy: You know, actually that's not a bad idea. I can do it out of my apartment. I don't think my mom would mind.
Roy: Yeah, yeah, yeah... This is so weird. I mean, you never know when it's gonna be your last dance. And I didn't even get a chance to finish it.
Joey: (sympathetic) Oh, I'm so sorry. I don't know any Spanish words.
Joey: Dude, dude! I think you're losing it.
Gene: Uhm, "I have fur", "I like to bark".
Ross: Because... the night you kissed Rachel was the night I kissed Rachel for the very first time.
Monica: Two guys in one night? Wow, I thought she became a slut after she got her nose fixed.
Ross: Okay, after you told me she was passed out in our room, I went in there to make sure she was all right. She was lying on my bed, all buried in peoples coats. Well, I went to kiss her on the forehead, you know. But it was so dark, I accidentally got her lips. I started to pull away, but then I felt her start to kiss me back. It was only for a second, but... it was amazing. And now, now I find out that you kissed her first.
Chandler: I'm pretty sure I put her on my bed.
Chandler: Why would I kiss a girl, and then put her on your bed?
Monica: I was the pile of coats!
Chandler: What did I marry into?
Ross: Yes, thats what I was going to ask, thank you.
Mr. Heckles: I could play the oboe!
Joey: Hey-hey, Im not judging.
MRS GREEN: That's fine. I never did it. I just thought I might. So, what's new in sex?
Chandler: I don't know, I-I have to listen to both of them, they don't exactly let each other finish...
Monica: I got it!
Rachel: All right, I like that.
Rachel: I can't believe this. This is her first birthday. She's awake. We're not even there. Everybody left. We still have this stupid obscene cake.
PHOEBE: I don't think it would have sold a million copies but it would have made a nice gift for you.
Ross: Its a good thing I didnt do it, because it sounds like it wouldve been a very expensive wedding. (Rachel laughs) Okay, good night
Rachel: I cannot push it in!
Janice: Well, I gotta buy a vowel. Because, oh my Gawd! Who, would've thought that someday, Chandler Bing would buy me a drawer.
PHOEBE: I can't believe two cows made the ultimate sacrifice so you guys could watch TV with your feet up.
Phoebe: Im sorry, okay, I-I wasnt looking, and the store says that they wont take it back because you signed for it...
Joey: Im telling you man, I saw it.
MONICA: But I thought you wanted to live by yourself.
Ross: Pheebs come on! I mean, consider the source! Of course her ex-husbands gonna say that stuff. Now, if youll excuse me
Dr. Green: Oh, wait, wait, wait, wait, I think I forgot my receipt.
Phoebe: Yeah, well, well see about that. Can I use your phone? I just wanna call everyone I know.
Phoebe: Oh, Rachel and I have appointments to get our hair cut.
Ross: No. No, it's just 'cause, uh, I kinda wanted to go out with her too, so I told her, actually, you were seeing Bernie Spellman... who also liked her, so...
Rachel: Okay, I heard that.
Ross: Uh, don't you think that would be a little weird? I mean, two guys in a romantic inn...
Ross: But we haven't seen each other since then. Well I land in China, guess who's in charge of the dig.
CHANDLER: You know I think he will be surprised, 'till he realizes he's a monkey, and uh, you know, isn't capable of that emotion.
Monica: What?! I just touched him and he went over.
Janice: I dont know.
Rachel: I also said number one.
Joey: I know. (giggles harder)
Monica: (entering with Rachel) Oh my God! Its true!! Oh my God you are so amazing! Oh my God, can I just ask you to do me oh, just one favor?
Monica: What we did was wrong. Oh god, I just had sex with somebody that wasn't alive during the Bicentennial.
Phoebe: (in a deep voice, imitating Ross) Um, Rachel Im really sorry. (imitating Rachel) Thats okay, do you wanna get back together? (imitating Ross) Yeah, okay. (in her normal voice) Did anyone else hear that?!
Chandler: I dont know, y'know. What, what, would you do?
Chandler: Oh, uh, I... don't... care. (Joey's date shows up) Ok, now, remember, no trading. You get the pretty one, I get the mess.
Chandler: I talked to Janice.
PHOEBE: Well, 'cause, I mean, what if, what if he's not this great dad guy? I mean, what if, what if he's just still the dirtbag who ran out on my mom and us? You know what? I've already lost a fake dad this week and I don't think I'm ready to lose a real one.
Ross: I know! Im saying you have to watch them all the time.
Rachel: Yeah honey, Im standing right there! Why didnt you just tell him about the mole I havent got checked yet.
Rachel: I did!! I watched! I watched! I watched Monica bang his head against that thing!
Phoebe: No, look, I told you that I didnt want you to try and sell it, and you just, you big fat did it anyway. God, y'know what, I think five years ago I probably wouldve done anything to play with you but, I can do it by myself. And if I cant trust you then just forget it.
Monica: Joey, please dont do that. I think its best that we just forget about it.
Chandler: I think you should go back with Gary. I dont wanna be the guy that breaks up a family, y'know when my parents split up, it was because of that guy. Whenever I would see him I was always think y'know Youre the reason, you are the reason why their not together. and I hated that guy. And it didnt matter how nice he was, or how happy he made my Dad.
Dr. Green: You know whats really good here, the lobster. What do you say shall I just order three.
Rachel: Ill get the hat.
Chandler: Oh no thats okay, you're totally right. I don't know anything about disciplining a child. But it did hurt my feelings and I want you to know that when I die, you don't get Joey.
Phoebe: I dunno. I don't feel like kissing anyone tonight.
Janice: (standing up) Im sorry. (hugs him)
Chandler: Forget what I said, I was babbling! Pick me!
Phoebe: Yes. But I left in the Ys. 'Cause, y'know, "sometimes y". Uh, I also have something else for you. (She searches in her purse.)
Erica: Oh, it was okay. I went to a movie with my cousin and then out for dinner. We went to this place that had... Ooh... (she looks likes she is in pain, holding her belly) Hoo... ooh... Anyway, they had these really amazing cheeseburgers.
MONICA: Dr. Burke? I don't think so. I mean, like, he's a grown up.
Phoebe: I know.
Chandler: I know.
Chandler: Ive found.
Rachel: I hope its still funny when youre in hell.
Phoebe: Ive found....
Chandler: (high pitched) No you know I dont mind.
Airline Employee: Sir! Im afraid Im gonna have to ask you to leave.
Joey: Ive got a science question.
Monica: I got you the foot massager.
Chandler: I can blow dry it. I can put gel on it. It doesnt matter, I still wind up with this little (pats the flat spot on the back of his head) cowlicky thing on the middle part of my head. Its so annoying. Does it bug you?
Chandler: No, no, no, I dont, I dont really wanna play.
Chandler: Yeah, all right, Ill play.
Ross: Um, Monica and I arent supposed to play football.
Ross: Did you see me? I was pretty good, huh? That is one fun game!
Joey: (entering) G. I. Joe! Cool! Can I play?
Monica: (faking happiness) Well, I-I-I-I... I don't know...
Monica: Well yknow, Im just-Im just worried that bosses will see them and think they pay you too much money. Or! Or your assistant will see them and-and want a raise!
Monica: (to Chandler and Joey) I won the game.
Rachel: Okay, wait a minute. Wait a minute, I-I-I, I can't do this. Listen honey, this is, it's not Phoebe's fault. She lent me the earrings, and I lost it. I'm so sorry. Honey, I feel terrible too. (Holds out her arms for a hug.)
Ross: Sweetie, now I pick you.
Phoebe: (on phone) 'Right, well look, um, if Joey loses this audition, that is it for Estelle. I don't care! Annie you are a doll, what time can you see him?' (to Monica) I need a pen. (Chandler hands her one, but she needs something to right on, so she tilts Chandler's head over and writes on the back of his neck)
Phoebe: Congratulations! I didnt want to say anything in front of Joey cause I didnt know if he knew yet.
Rachel: Monica, Im your best friend.
Phoebe: I thought you meant in life.
Ross: Yes! No-no! I know, I know what the list is! Mom! Look if you see Chandler, could you just let him know Im looking for him?
Monica: Phoebe, I thought you said you know what youre doing?
JOEY: I don't know, you see somethin', you hear a word, I thought that's what it was. Let me see it again.
Chandler: Sorry. Im sorry. Y'know what, were just gonna throw it.
Rachel: Because it is too damn hard Ross. I can't even begin to explain to you how much I'm gonna miss you. When I think about not seeing you every day, it makes me not want to go... Okay, so if you think that I didn't say goodbye to you because you don't mean as much to me as everybody else, you're wrong. It's because you mean more to me. So there, all right, there's your goodbye... Oh!
Ross: Okay, (to Chandler) this play, I want you to do a down and out to the right. Okay. Break!
Woman: Im Margha.
Woman: Im Dutch.
Rachel: Wait, what am I gonna do?
Ross: Well, I said it loud.
Joey: I think so.
Joey: Hi-hi, Im Joey.
Margha: It is okay, if I stay and watch?
Rachel: Yeah, I know, go long. Y'know, its like all Im doing is running back and forth from the huddle.
Chandler: Thanks. What, let me have her?! What do mean? Like if you didnt I wouldnt have a shot?
Chandler: I think its necessary. (Backs away anyhow.)
Chandler: (entering from the bedroom wearing a big, pink bunny costume) Monica! Can I talk to you for a second? Listen, I appreciate you getting me the costume
Rachel: Can I see that for second.
Chandler: Ah, I dont know, you tell me. Anything you ah, wanna tell me, because, if you ah, you should, if you, you would, tell me.
CHANDLER: Alright, that's it. Look Joey, I'm sorry, I realize this is the role of a lifetime for ya, and if I could just fire Joseph, I would, but unfortunately that's not possible so I'm gonna have to let both of you go.
RICHARD: You know, I like the way you have efficiently folded this tab under. See in a tape emergency you could shave valuable seconds off your time.
Phoebe: Well, okay, I made a touchdown. It was my first touchdown. So?
Ross: Come here. (he hugs Rachel) Listen, you deserve so much better than him...you know, I mean, you, you, you should be with a guy who knows what he has when he has you.
Monica: Y'know what? Ill think youll play.
Sarah: So thats two boxes of the Holiday Macaroons. On behalf of the Brown Birds of America, I salute you. (Does the Brown Bird salute, she blows on a bird call, then holds her hand, palm facing out, next to her face, and then waves it like a bird flapping its wings.)