words in movies
Chandler: I tried, but apparantly singing "I will survive" in a helium voice - not helping.
Joey: You damn right I am, I've been waiting for a cookie for 7 minutes.
Chandler: Are you kidding? If I wasn't married she'd be rejecting me right now.
Rachel: Am I the only one who doesn't think that she's hot? Ross?
Ross: Eh, I mean, I mena she's not unattractive but hot? I ....
Rachel: So hot I cried myself to sleep last night. (Joey and Chandler clap their hands)
Mike: OK, I don't want to freak you out or anything, but I think I just saw a rat in your cupboard.
Phoebe: Well not so much a pet as, you know, an occasional visitor who I put food out for, you know. Kinda like Santa. Except Santa doesn't poop on the plate of cookies.
Mike: I don't know but they don't sound like spa treatments. You have to get rid of it!
Rachel: Gavin, I just wanted to say thank you again for watching Emma yesterday during the presentation. I really owe you an appology.
Rachel: Well, when we first met, you know, I thought you were pompous and arrogant and obnoxious ...
Rachel: No, I just mean that, you know, first impressions don't mean anything. And I-I think you're a really good guy and I'm sorry that I misjudged you.
Rachel: Hello. (to Gavin) But you know what, hey, new day, new leaf, I am just really really happy ... (sees Gavin staring at Heather) I'm sorry, obviously Heather's ass has something more important to say so I'll just wait 'till it's finished.
Rachel: I was giving you an appology and you were totally checking her out!
Gavin: I wasn't checking her out. I'm in fashion, I was looking at her skirt. Or was it pants? I didn't really see what happened below the ass area.
Gavin: Why do you even care if I was looking at her? Are you jealous?
Rachel: Oh yeah, I'm jealous. "Oh Gavin, please, please look at my ass". (Gavin starts looking) Stop looking at my ass! I mean, I just think you are totally inappropriate, ok? This is a work environment, she's your subordinate.
Gavin: I thought it was ok when you slept with your old assistant Tag.
Rachel: That is totally different for two reasons. One - I didn't know that you knew that. And two, I wasn't some creep staring at his ass, we had a deap meaningful relationship.
Joey: Man, I wish I had a nanny like you.
Chandler: I wasn't staring. I was leering.
Ross: Yeah, obvious beauty's the worst. You know, when it's right there in your face. Me, I like to have to work to find someone attractive. Makes me feel like I earned it.
Ross: Ok, I'll be home right after work. Ok, by Emma-Wemma-Demma, I love you - wovyou dovyou ...
Molly: I think it's sweet. (goes to leave)
Rachel: (to Joey) Hey, listen, Joey, about Molly, I really prefer if you didn't go after her.
Rachel: Because it took us months to find a good nanny and I wouldn't want anything to, you know, drive her away.
Joey: Oh, man, why did have to go and say that for? Now that you told me I can't have it makes me want her even more!
Phoebe: No, Mike, I don't want to kill him! I thought we were just gonna capture him and, and you know, set him free in the country side where he can maybe meet a friendly possom and a wisecracking owl.
Phoebe: I'll find Bob, I'll get him. Bob? (starts looking) Bob! Robert! (looks at cabinet under sink) Oh wait, I think I hear him. Oh - Oh my god! Bob had babies! Bob's a mom!
Phoebe: I don't know, I kinda like Bob for a girl.
Mike: I don't know, I mean I'm not sure (they hear cracking voice from somewhere else in the kitchen, probably a rat caught in a trap) ...
Chandler: Is this really your long term plan, for me to run interference? Because I could get a job any day now.
Chandler: Allright, fine, but don't blame me if it doesn't work. Because you know as well as I do that once Joey sets his mind on something, more often than not, he's going to have sex with it.
Ross: I am, yes.
Chandler: Oh. You mind if I join you?
Joey: Actually, that will be long. You know, I really need to organize my thoughts.
Joey: Allright, fine, I only have one thought! It's about the hot nanny, I gotta see her!
Chandler: I'm afraid I can't let you do that, Joe.
Joey: Now YOU'RE telling me I can't see her?? You guys are killing me! She's forbidden fruit! It's like ... like she's the princess and I'm the stable boy ... Why are you doing this, huh? Did Ross tell you not to let me go over there?
Chandler: Yes, as a matter of fact he did, so I can't let you go.
Rachel: Rachel Green's office!! Give me that phone! (takes the phone) Hello, this is Rachel Green, how can I help you? Uh huh ... ok then ... I'll pass you back to your son (gives phone to Gavin)
Rachel: Um, excuse me Gavin, I have a question I need to ask you.
Gavin: Thank god you finally said that, I saw you make a note on your pad three hours ago. (Rachel throws away that paper) Man, I really bug you, don't I?
Rachel: Oh, please, I don't care about you enough to bug me. In fact, from now on, I'm going take the high road. And I'm going be very very nice to you, you "momma's boy", starting right now.
Rachel: Yeah I am, I am! Oh, but first of all, Monica, I would like to introduce you to my very talented colleage and more importantly my wonderful friend Gavin Mitchelle.
Gavin: Well I don't mind, I'll cancel. I would never miss my secretary's birthday. (leaves)
Rachel: Why did you invite him?? I can't stand that guy!
Rachel: I was faking it! Can't you tell when I'm being fake?
Rachel: (to Monica) I still can't believe you invited Gavin. Allright, he is the last person I want to see.
Rachel: God, I hope he doesn't show up. Of course he's not gonna show up, the guy hates me.
Joey: Hey Rach, so can I sing happy birthday to you now?
Phoebe: I had to bring them! We killed their mother, they're our responsibility now. You know, they require constant care. You should know that, Rachel, you're a mother.
Phoebe: No! Seven rats! I think we should take them home, we need feed them.
Ross: Where the hell are Joey and Molly? I asked you to watch them.
Chandler: (In a helium voice, holding a balloon) I'm sorry, I got a little occupied.
Joey: Oh, I didn't go to college.
Joey: No ... the leather sticks to my ass. You know, this isn't fair. What makes you think that I'm just gonna sleep with her and then blow her off? Huh? Can't you guys open your minds to the possibility that I actally like her, and might want something real? (pause) Look, the truth is, I haven't felt this way about anyone since Rachel, ok? I didn't think I could ever love again.
Ross: Ok ... (they leave the room, long pause) Well, uh, Joey, I guess we have no problem.
Phoebe: Ok, ok, you start preparing the formula and I start changing the box and then we gotta put them straight to bed.
Phoebe: No. (opens the box) wh - get off your sister! Oh my god, what are we gonna do? We have 7 rats. So what if each of them has 7 rats? And then each of those have 7 rats? That's like ... (starts counting with her fingers) That's math I can't even do! What are we gonna do?
Mike: Well, I know this is gonna sound crazy, but, we could not let the box of rats ruin our lives.
Phoebe: Yeah, ok. I guess you're right. Allright, so we should just give them away. But to nice families, with children, and reduced fat wheat thins. They're Bob's favorites.
Mike: No, I think you're sweet.
Phoebe: Good. It's just so hard, it's hard for me to ... let them go. I guess it just brings back memories, you know, from ... when I gave birth to my brother's triplets and I had to give them up. (Mike is shocked) I haven't told you about that yet, have I?
Rachel: Hi. Thanks for the party, honey. Should I help you clean up?
Monica: No way! You had your party, now I have mine! Is everything alright?
Rachel: Yeah, I just get a little bummed when my birthday's over.
Gavin: Well, let me explain how birthday parties usually work. There are presents, and a cake, perhaps a fourth or fifth person. Ok, I ... got you the present to make up for being such a jerk to you earlier.
Gavin: I really mean it.
Gavin: I do have feelings for you.
Gavin: Yes, I feel that you are a little annoying.
Chandler: (sings in a helium voice) First I was afraid, I was petrified (very happy)
Phoebe: Listen, I think I've left something here.
Phoebe: (likes the jacket) No, but I like it. I think I left one of my rat babies.
Chandler: Oh, uh, well, I haven't seem it but if I do I'll let you know.
Rachel: I didn't know there were docks.
Joey: (interrupting her) Hey! Don't worry about it! It was fine! I ended up having the best time with Rachel! I just felt bad for you, stuck in that room, working on Ross's speech... (pulls a face)
Ross: Oh and you know what, it will be even better tomorrow, because I won't be constantly interrupted by Joey checking to see if they put chocolates on my pillow yet. (Someone knocks on the door, Ross goes to open and it's Joey, Rachel and Chandler).
Rachel: I know!
Ross: Im sorry, okay, Im sorry. I wa-I was disgusted with myself, and this morning I was so, I was so upset and then I got your message and I was so happy, and all I wanted was to get her out of my apartment as fast as possible.
Monica: Ohh, Im so glad. Thank you so much for staying so calm during this. I mean its really, its made me stay calm. (Chandler just looks at her.) I coulda been worse!
Phoebe: Wow. Okay, I dont know how to talk to you.
RYAN: I'm sorry, I never had 'em.
Joey: All right, Im sorry. Rach IRach Im sorry. Okay? Im sorry! Maybe I can make up for it by, taking you roughly in the barn. (Giggles.)
Rachel: What? You wanna see me self-defend myself?! Go over there (points) and pretend youre a sexual predator! Go on! I dare ya!!
Rachel: (entering from her bedroom) Well, I just called Joshua
Joey: Ah, y'know just in general people being gay, thing. Im totally cool with that.
MONICA: Two? TWO? How is that possible? I mean, have you seen you?
Chandler: Okay! You dont think I thought of that?
Rachel: I mean thats unbelievable.
Chandler: I cant remember which sister.
Joey: I just got off the phone with my sister.
Chandler: Yep, Im in a tree.
Cynthia: I can't believe you thought that you were going to video tape us having sex on the first date! (She storms away and Rachel enters to confront Joey.)
Rachel: Honey, hes about to go hit on Isabella Rosselini. Im just sorry we dont got popcorn.
Monica: No honey, Im sorry, but the weekends not over yet.
Monica: I mean, was it Gina?
Monica: I dont remember. Do you wanna take a walk?
Rachel: Yeah, I do. (they both run out)
ROB: I don't know anything about music, but I think you're really, really great.
Chandler: Im here to see Mary-Angela.
CHANDLER: Yeah well, I hear the place looks great.
Chandler: Excuse me little one, I have a very solid backhand.
MR. WINEBURG: It's so wonderful to see you again, my dear, in fact I hardly expected to see so much.
Chandler: So will I.
Joeys Grandmother: No! I did!
Monica: I wish all guys could be like him.
Monica: I mean dont you trust her?
Mary-Angela: (standing behind Chandler) I am!
Joeys Sister: I say, punch him Joey.
Rachel: (sarcastic) Oh, and Monica gets to keep her? In her house? I am so jealous!
Joey: No! No! No! No, Im not going to punch Chandler.
Cookie: Ill do it.
Rachel: I know.
Joey: Hey-hey-hey-ho-ho, I got this one. Here you go. (Hands Gunther Chandlers card.) Yknow I gotta tell ya, sometimes I justI dont get Chandler. Yknow, me and him do stuff all the time without you and you dont get all upset.
Joey: Well, Im sorry. I thought parents were coming! Yknow? Your parents are comin! Chandlers parents are comin! Rosss parents are comin!
Ross: Im so proud of you.
Rachel: Oh, I did!
Chandler: I say we go with Careless Whisper.
Mark: Hi. I just talked to Joanna, and she loves you. You got it, you got the job.
Monica: Yeah, I do know.
Rachel: Honey, Im sorry.
Joey: Okay now, before I make my final decision I uh, I just want to make sure our personalities match. Okay, so I made up a little test. Now, Im gonna say a word and then you say the first thing that comes to mind.
Guy: (muffled) May I help you?
Joey: Im tellin ya, he hasnt moved since this morning.
Rachel: No, no, no, no turtles scare me. I don't need that today.
Chandler: Whoa-ho, whoa! No, I was thinking about y'know for me, as a part of that whole getting over Janice thing you were talking about.
Carl: I mean, come on, buddy, get a real car!
Ross: What? Oh yeah, yeah I think so. Why am I invited to this again?
Mrs. Bing: (on TV) Oh, fine. I'm leaving for New York tomorrow, which I hate- but I get to see my son, who I love...
Rachel: Oh! Oh my God! What did I just do?
Ross: Look, you guys I just wanna say, I really, really appreciate you spending this time with me. Its been a pretty hard time right now, so I just wanna say thanks.
Mark: And who may I say is calling?
Chandler: I want to say you but, that seems like such an easy answer.
Ross: Well, you can't know where I am all the time. Look, this marriage is never gonna work if you don't trust me.
Ross: Hi, Im selling Brown Bird cookies.
Chandler: Can somebody else hug him? I have to stay by the window.
Jeannine: Well, if you don't, I will.
Rachel: Yeah! Right! Okay, Ill see you guys later. (starts to leave) Woo hoo!
Monica: Why don't I just take off my clothes and have a nightmare.
PHOEBE: I'm not gonna. But you know what's cool though? Ok, if you had a friend named Pete, then I could say, 'Oh yeah, I know Pete, he's friends with my brother.'
Joey: Yeah, I can dance, y'know. (starts to dance really, really, really badly)
Ross: LookOkay, Im just gonnaIm gonna have to go find him and bring him back! Okay? You-you make sure Monica does not find out, okay?
Rachel: Okay... aahhh... Please laugh for mommy... Please? Please laugh for mommy... (Rachel makes a funny face, sticking her tongue out, making a farting noise and using her hands as antlers, wiggling her fingers... No response from Emma...) Not funny huh? Oh so, is it... only offensive novelty rap? Or maybe just, you know, rap in general? 'Cause mommy can rap... (Rachel tries to rap and makes weird movements with her arms in the process.) My name is mommy and I'm here to say / that all the babies are... Oh, I can't rap... Allright sweetheart... This is only because I love you so much, and I know that you're not gonna tell anybody... (Rachel's face is telling "Oh what am I doing? The things I have to go through... and she starts to rap) I like... big butts and I cannot lie... / You other brothers can't deny... / when a girl walks in with an itty bitty waist and a round thing in your face... (Emma starts to laugh) Yes! Yes! Yes! YES! Oohhhhh! Oh! (Rachel now really gets into it, and her insecure movements start getting better) I like big butts and I cannot lie... / You other brothers can't deny... Oh Emma you're laughing! Oh you are, you really do like big butts, don't you. Oh you beautiful little weirdo... (Rachel picks up Emma and Ross now enters)
Ross: Well I dont know, but how-how great would that be huh? You living in my building. I could help take care of the baby. I can come over whenever I want. (Rachel looks at him.) With your permission.
Monica: Oh good, I think so too. Pheebs?
Rachel: All right Ross!! I get it!!
Ross: I mean my God...
Joey: Hey, I only got one good arm, you know. You should be doing stuff for me. Go get me a sweater.
Rachel: (in triumph) I got a touchdown! We did it!!
Ross: I would never do that!
Ross: I'm hurt! I'm actually hurt, that you would think that I would send you any of those things out of any thing other than love. Hurt! Hurt!
JOEY: Uh, I get Leslie out of the coma and then we make out.
Ross: I don't know you guys.
Ross: What am I going to do?
Ross: Chandler!!! Chandler!!! (He opens the door to the apartment but is stopped by the chain; Chandler and Monica quickly stop making out and try to get dressed.) Chandler, I saw what you were doing through the window! Chandler, I saw what you were doing to my sister! Now get out here!
Monica: Oh, honey!I can't. I was just telling these guys that things are crazy at the restaurant!
Chandler: Janices birthday is coming up, I want to get her something speacial. Come in here with me.
DR. REMORE: Amber, I want you to know that I'll always be there for you, as a friend and as your brother.
CHANDLER: Well you know, we got to talking and uh, he said he needed a place and I had a spare room.
Joey: I just wanna say that I'm sorry I referred to the vein as a seperate person...
Monica: Because it would totally freak him out and tomorrow's our anniversary. I just don't want anything to spoil that.
Ross: Not that big a deal? It's amazing. Ok, you just reach in there, there's one little maneuver, and bam, a bra right out the sleeve. All right, as far as I'm concerned, there is nothing a guy can do that even comes close. Am I right?
Janice: Wait! Wait! I wanna see this. After I divorce him, half of that kingdom is gonna be mine.
Chandler: (leaning in) Ill go.
RACHEL: Hi, hi can I help you?
PHOE: Well, I finally took your advice and asked him what was going on.
Joey: I know, it was the best I could get out of them.
Phoebe: If I havent said it before: shes a lucky, lucky lady! So, where are you going towhat the mother of crap is up with this stuff? (Referring to the taffy, which shes been chewing this whole time.) Oh, God. Is it gum, is it food? Whats the deal? (she swallows it, finally) Oh, its nice! May I try a pink one?
Chandler: My boss said I might be getting a new lamp in my cubicle. (Monica looks at him and can't really place what he just said)
MRS. GREENE: ...I may have only been in therapy for three weeks now dear but...
Monica: All right Rachel, you sweep behind, Ill pitch it to you, you throw it down field to Phoebe. All right. Break.
Ross: (sits down next to her) I'm sorry, I was an idiot.
Ross: Oh, just this woman that I met last night at the party.
[Scene: Central Perk, Ross is eyeing a beautiful woman at the counter, and Joey and Chandler are egging him on to go talk to her. No pun intended. I mean it.]