words in movies
JOEY: Nice, nice. Hey I got somethin' for you. [hands Chandler an envelope.
CHANDLER: Well, I don't know what Big Leon told ya but it's an even thousand if you want me for the whole night. What is this for?
JOEY: Well, I'm makin money now and this is payin' you back for head shots, electric bills, and so many slices of pizza I can't even count. I love ya man.
CHANDLER: Well, thanks man. Now I can get my pony.
CHANDLER: Wow, I don't know what to say. [opens the box and pulls out an incredibly gaudy gold bracelet] Wow, I, I don't know what to say.
CHANDLER: I don't know. It's a bracelet.
CHANDLER: Oh, now? [puts it in his desk drawer] No, no, I think something this nice should be saved for a special occasion. [sets a chair in front of the drawer]
CHANDLER: I so am.
CHANDLER: Well, it'll probably slow it down at first but, once I get used to the extra weight, I'll be back on track.
INTERVIEWER: And if I want to call for a reference on your last job?
MONICA: A salad? Really I, I could do something a little more complicated if you like.
INTERVIEWER: Now, I want you to tell me what you're doing while you're doing it.
INTERVIEWER: Don't, I like it dirty.
MONICA: Well, I thought that I would cut up the tomatos.
MONICA: Actually, I was gonna do them jullienne.
ROSS: Y-ello. No, Rachel's not here right now, can I take a message? Alright, and how do we spell Casey, is it like at the bat or and the Sunshine Band? OK, bye-bye. Hey, who's this uh, this Casey?
ROSS: [puts the message in the cupboard] I don't know, I don't get, I don't get it, I mean, wh, wh, two months ago Rachel and I were like, this close. Right now, what, I'm takin messages from guys she, she meets at the movies? I mean this, this Casey should be takin' down my messages, ya know, or, or, Rachel and I should be together and, and we should get some kind of me, message service.
MONICA: Yeah, I think that fifth shower actually got the interview off me.
MONICA: Oh yeah, well there's the possibility that I won't make rent.
ROSS: Monica, if you want, I can lend you some money.
MONICA: No no no, if I couldn't pay you back right away then I'd feel guilty and tense every time I saw you.
MR. GELLER: Well, I can't say any of us were surprised. Your parents have been unhappy ever since we've known them. Especially after that incident in Hawaii.
MR. GELLER: Uhh, naa, no no no, I, I must be thinking of someone else, uh, maybe me. Don't you have some folding to do? Go fold dear. Fold. You fold. [shuffles her into her room]
PHOEBE: OK. Ooh, OK, you gotta give me a second, I wanna get this just right. [she sticks out her gut, clears her throat and sniffs her nose and then in her best male voice. . .] Dude, 11 o'clock, totally hot babe checkin' you out. That was really good, I think I'm ready for my penis now.
CHANDLER: [walks over to the woman] I know what you're thinking, Dave Thomas, founder of Wendy's.
GAIL: I, I really have to be somewhere but it was nice meeting you.
CHANDLER: I pity the fool who puts on my jewelry, I do, I do. I pity the fool that. . . [turns around and sees Joey] Hi. Hey man, we were just doin' some uhh, impressions over here. Do your Marcel Marceau. [Joey turns around and walks out without saying anything] That's actually good.
ROSS: Would you look at that guy, I mean how long has he been talking to her. It's like, back off buddy she's a waitress not a geisha.
PHOEBE: I think she's OK.
ROSS: Oh, oh my God, is this the wrong day? I don't believe it, uh, well, hey, I guess if it works out we'll, we'll have something to tell the grandkids.
ROSS: I was saving you.
ROSS: Oh, see from where I was sitting I uh. . .
RACHEL: OK, Ross, listen to me, I am not yours to save.
RACHEL: No, listen to me. I fell for you and I get clobbered. You then fall for me and I again, somehow, get clobbered. I'm tired of being clobbered, ya know, it's, it's just not worth it.
CHANDLER: Well, doesn't the fact that I wore the bracelet even though I hated it say something about our friendship and how much it means to me?
CHANDLER: OK, well that's the part where I'm a wank. But I was hoping we wouldn't focus on that. [Joey goes to his room and shuts the door] Hey, c'mon man, I said I was sorry like a hundred times, I promise I will never take it off my. . . [notices the bracelet is missing from his wrist] wrist. But if, if you want to stay in there and be mad, you know, you just uh, you stay in there. [he starts searching the room, lifting up the couch cushions]
CHANDLER: I am here, on my knees, holding up these couch cushions as a symbol of my sorrow and regret, much like they did in biblical times. Though you may haveth anger now. . . [Joey returns to his room]
MONICA: No, but that's probably 'cause I haven't asked them yet.
MONICA: Um, yeah, so uh, uhh, listen, I'm sorry I didn't tell you this before but umm, I, I'm no longer at my job, I, I had to leave it.
CHANDLER: I can't believe it.
CHANDLER: Oh, you're right I, I should play in the hay. Forget about the fact that I just dropped 400 dollars to replace a bracelet that I hated to begin with. Bring on the hay. [sits down at the bar]
CHANDLER: What am I gonna do, huh? [Joey walks in behind him]
CHANDLER: No, I can't. No no, listen, I, I know how much this means to you and I also know that this is about more than just jewelry, [puts bracelet on Joey] it's about you and me and the fact that we're [reading bracelet] best buds.
JOEY: Wow, is this friendship? I think so. Check it out, we're bracelet buddies.
ROSS: Yeah, yeah I mean, you get your money and you learn a little something, what's wrong with that?
MONICA: Oh, um, that was my bathing suit from high school. I was uh, a little bigger then.
CHANDLER: Oh, I thought that's what they used to cover Connecticut when it rained.
MRS. GELLER: Over here Jack. OK. I see, Rachel's coming up the path. Oh doesn't she look pretty. Jack, get this. [Rachel enters with a huge nose]
CHANDLER: OK, I was wrong, that's what they used to cover Connecticut.
MONICA: Shoot, I think I got mayonaise on you.
RACHEL: [the shoulders of her dress keep falling off her shoulders] Is my hook unhooked? These things keep falling down, I can't. . .
ROSS: Uh, hold, let me see, I don't know. So what're you gonna do. . . [doorbell rings]
MONICA: I just told Rachel that Roy touched my boob.
RACHEL: I can't go to my own prom without a date, I can't, it's too late.
MONICA: If you're not going then I don't want to go either.
MRS. GELLER: [to Ross on the stairs] I have a wonderful idea. You should take Rachel to the prom.
ROSS: I don't know.
RACHEL: I can't believe I don't get to go to my own prom, this is so harsh.
ROSS: OK, you guys, ya know, I think we've seen enough, let's turn it off.
MRS. GELLER: Oh, dear. Jack, how do I turn this off?
MONICA: I can't believe you did that.
MR. GELLER: I may not know any of your flash dances but I'm no slouch on the dance floor.
Rachel: Ohh, its gonna be so great! Im gonna get to help decide what we sell, Im gonna have an office with walls and everything. (turns to Monica) Im gonna have walls!
Chandler: Do I look fat?
GRANDMOTHER: Anyway, that's all I know. That, and this. [pulls apart a frame and pulls a picture out] This is the real him.
Monica: Honey, we've been trying to have a baby for over a year. I think it's a good idea to find out if everything's ok. Just a few routine tests.
Monica: How do I tell Chandler that its too soon. Its gonna break his heart, hes not gonna think that I dont love him anymore.
Chandler: I... thought it was a timely start to thinking about other people. Besides, this gift still says I love you guys.
Rachel: Look, I am so so happy for you guys, but you getting married just reminds me of the fact that Im not. Im not even close. And I dont know, maybe I just wanted to make myself feel better. And I know that thats dumb, but oh my God you were so depressed when Ross got married that you slept with Chandler!
JOEY: Ten years I've been waiting for a break like this Chandler, ten years! I mean, Days of Our Lives. That's actually on television.
Ross: So is everybody here? I got here a little early myself. Let us begin. Now, the hydrosaurids have been unearthed in two main locations. (He moves to the map and we see why he made it to class on time, hes wearing in-line skates and hasnt taken them off.) Here. (Points to the map, somewhere in the Middle East, then spins on the skates and points to the map.) Here. (China.) Now as for the hydrosaurs
Monica: Y'know what? After you're with this woman for like ten minutes, you forget all that. I mean, she is this astounding person, with this, with this amazing spirit.
FRANK: I gotta friend named Mark.
Phoebe: Yeah, but did they have to shoot him down? I mean, that was just mean.
DR. REMORE: Some guys are just lucky I guess.
ROSS: Pheebs, I have studied evolution my entire adult life. Ok, I can tell you, we have collected fossils from all over the world that actually show the evolution of different species, ok? You can literally see them evolving through time.
Phoebe: Okay, I asked for the news, not the weather.
(Ross turns his back on Paul and makes a I hate that guy face. Paul does the same thing.)
Phoebe: Yeah, it's weird. I can't help it though he's so sweet, he's like this little puppy dog, y'know? But like a really tough one that shots bad guys. Ohh, I just love beginning parts of relationships, y'know?! You just like can't keep your hands off each other.
Mike: Well hey, I wanna ask you about Monica's little "groomy" joke.
Chandler: Hello? Hello? Oh, hey Charlie. Did anybody else hear? ... What? Susan got it?? How? Oh man, I would have slept with him!! .. Alright, bye. (hangs up)
Monica: Hey. Its three in the morning. They dont know that Ive come home yet. You notice how neither one of them are wondering where I am.
Mr. Tribbiani: No, it's only been six years. I just wanted to put a nice memory in your head so you'd know that I wasn't always such a terrible guy. ...Joe. Y'ever been in love?
Malcom: I was thinking what it would be like to kiss you.
Chandler: No, that's all right. I just had a jar of mustard.
JOEY: Oh, Richard's here. I should run down say bye to him (runs out)
JOEY: Well, it was a fight. . . based on serious stuff, remember. About how I never lived alone or anything. I just think it would be good for me, ya know, help me to grow or. . . whatever.
Monica: Oh, that's what I would do, forget mine.
Robert: So um, is there a phone here, I can check my messages?
Janice: Oh, (laughs) I wish. No, you know he was just trying Ross's Hug and Roll thing.
Monica: I think, that if you really like this guy, you should just trust him.
Phoebe: What are you saying I should do?
Rachel: (moves the stool out of the way) Yeah! Ohh, Ive been waitin so long to get on that body!
Emily: I realize that people are going to be disappointed. But, Im sure theyll come back when we can do it right.
Rachel: Uh, I will see you... and I'll raise you. (throws chips in pot) What do you say... want to waste another buck?
Malcom: Uh-huh, I don't know.
Joey: I don't know, I just always pictured you ending up with one of those tall, smart blond guys, name like.... Hoyt.
Joey: It's a name, yeah. I saw you, you know, in this great house with a big pool.
Monica: I like that. (Joey starts laughing) What?
Phoebe: I went shopping with Monica all day, and I had a salad.
Ross: I assume we're looking for an answer more sophisticated than 'to get you into bed'.
Joey: Look, I don't have it all worked out yet, but it's gotta mean big money! Come on! Identical hands!
Joey: The fridge broke. I have to eat everything. Cold cuts, ice cream, limesHey, what was in that brown jar?
Rachel: Well Im alone and I just bought fifteen dollars worth of candy bars, what do you think?
Chandler: Mmmm. Not tonight, honey. I got an early day tomorrow.
Chandler: (to Joey) Noo!! I dont care! Im not, Im not gonna playing one-on-one strip poker with you for practice!
Chandler: You're flingin'-flangin' right I am!
Ross: Now, if you wanna try to make some of it back, Id be glad to play you for it. But I should warn you, I am very good at Cups.
Monica: I wish we at least knew his name... Look at that face. I mean, even sleeping, he looks smart. I bet he's a lawyer.
Monica: See, now this is why I keep notepads everywhere.
Joey: I swear to god, Dad. That's not how they measure pants.
Mrs. Geller: Oh, she just graduated, and she wants to be something in cooking, or food, or.... I don't know. Anyway, I told her you had a restaurant-
Joey: I love that movie. (Joey is using it as a pillow)
ROSS: No, but, but I wanna be with you in spite of all those things.
Young Ethan: I am telling you, up until I was, like nine, I thought that gunpoint was an actual place where crimes happen.
Phoebe: (handing Rachel the phone) Fine all right, but Id bet youd be singing another tune if we were fighting over a ratchet.
Strange man: (he bounds into the house) I knew you'd be here!
MONICA: Well, CHP because I used to have a crush on Eric Estrada. And ZXY becuase I think it sounds zexy.
JOEY: These'll go great in my new place. You know, 'till I get real ones.
Monica: Ow! (Chandler slaps her on her back) Oh, that sounds nice! I am just there for jury duty. They really spruce that place up!
Mona: I dont understand. You-you give me a key to your apartment and then you change the lock.
Woman: Yeah, well, I had a 24-inch waist. You lose things. Now come on, get outta my way.
Phoebe: Oh, I don't know. I mean it was fun one time.
Joey: Yeah! Well, well really it's three. Please. You're so good at it. I love you.
Monica: (To Chandler) Look honey, you dont have to do this, okay? Its the strength you have inside that means the most to me. Youre loyal, youre honest, and you have integrity! Thats the kind of strength that I want in the man that I love!
Eric: Hi, Im Eric, Im gonna be Chandlers new roommate.
ROSS: Hey, tell me again, what do I do when Mr. Roper calls?
Joey: Hey Ross, check this out! (he tries to spin a basketball on his fingertip but he throws it against a table) yeah, I can't do that!
Ross: (sarcastically) Oh Great! After I finish my wine I'm going to blow my... eh. average-sized brains out.
Joey: Okay. Okay. Umm Ooh! Oh-oh, I got something. Its this story I came up with, very romantic. I swear any woman that hears it; theyre like putty.
Rachel: I dont know, let me think. I was walking down the street thinking, Im gonna tell the father today and then bam!
Ross: Here we go. (Plays one note) Yknow, Ive-Ive never played my stuff for anyone before, so its important that-that you understand its about communicating very private emotions. (Plays another note) Yknow, umm, you should-you should think of umm, my work as wordless sound poems. Thats what Im
Rachel: Well, I never thought I'd say this, but I'm gonna go use Ugly Naked Guy's bathroom. (Does so.)
Ross: You know what it's fine. If you're okay with the Barbi thing, so am I.
Chandler: Okay, okay. So, should I call her?
PHOEBE: No, 'cause you just said dad and everywhere I go today I keep getting signs telling me to go see my father. Like when I was walking over here and I passed a buffet...which is my father's last name.
Chandler: I said, 'So I'm not gonna lose her?'
Joey: Why not?! (to Chandler) Im hungry.
Cop: Sipowicz? No, I don't think so.
LIPSON: Ahh, I'm afraid I have some bad news. Marcel has passed on.
Phoebe: Oh, Joey! Oh, okay, see I didn't recognize you wearing, in those....pants.
EDDIE: Oh, this is, this is unbelievable. I mean, first you sleep with my ex-girlfriend then you insult my inteligenct by lying about it and then you kill my fish, my Buddy?
Joey: You said I had to give you the chair, you didn't say anything about the cushions.
Phoebe: Oh, now you're sad and creepy, oh. You know what, I, I'm sorry I quit, okay, I just quit.
JOEY: But wait, wait, wait. Then, after I left her office, she caught up with me at the elevator and offered me an even bigger part.
Chandler: Can I be that guy?
Joey: I didn't get it?
Phoebe: Yeah, no, I understand.
David: Daryl Hannah was the most beautiful woman that he'd ever seen in his life and I said yeah, I liked her in Splash, a lot, but not so much in- in Wall Street, I thought she had kind of a
Carol: I cant speak for Emily, but Susan is in a loving, committed relationship.
JOEY: My animals. Hey the guy said they suited me, he spoke with an accent, I was all confused. I don't know what I'm gonna do.
Phoebe: (walking over) Hey. Ursulas fianc�e is really sweet! Hes a teacher, he does all this volunteer work. Yknow normally yknow, I dont like really sweaty guys. But this one? I could just mop him up!
Rachel: (softly) I think you should go.
Chandler: (on phone) I love you too.
Carol: G. I. Joe. G. I. Joe?!
Chandler: I love the specifics, the specifics were the best part!
JOEY: And, and just so you know, if you wanted to expand this scene like, like have the cab crash or somethin', I could attend to the victims 'cause I have a background in medical acting.
Rachel: (softly) I really think you need to go now.
Ross: I will, I will. See, I'm waiting for the right moment. (Joey looks at him) What? What, now?
Chandler: Janice I didnt even know you were pregnant! Whos the unwitting human whos essence youve stolen?
Monica: You know what? I take back what I said before. You keep playing at the restaurant, because with your music driving people inside, my bar sales are going up like crazy.
Phoebe: Hey, that’s not fair! A person’s wedding is important! And especially to me! Ok? I didn’t have a graduation party! And I didn’t go to Prom. And I spent my sweet sixteen being chased round a tire yard by an escaped mental patient who is his own words wanted to “kill me” or whatever. So I deserve a real celebration and I am not gonna let some sweaty little man make me feel badly about it.( She storms out)