words in movies
JOEY: Nice, nice. Hey I got somethin' for you. [hands Chandler an envelope.
CHANDLER: Well, I don't know what Big Leon told ya but it's an even thousand if you want me for the whole night. What is this for?
JOEY: Well, I'm makin money now and this is payin' you back for head shots, electric bills, and so many slices of pizza I can't even count. I love ya man.
CHANDLER: Well, thanks man. Now I can get my pony.
CHANDLER: Wow, I don't know what to say. [opens the box and pulls out an incredibly gaudy gold bracelet] Wow, I, I don't know what to say.
CHANDLER: I don't know. It's a bracelet.
CHANDLER: Oh, now? [puts it in his desk drawer] No, no, I think something this nice should be saved for a special occasion. [sets a chair in front of the drawer]
CHANDLER: I so am.
CHANDLER: Well, it'll probably slow it down at first but, once I get used to the extra weight, I'll be back on track.
INTERVIEWER: And if I want to call for a reference on your last job?
MONICA: A salad? Really I, I could do something a little more complicated if you like.
INTERVIEWER: Now, I want you to tell me what you're doing while you're doing it.
INTERVIEWER: Don't, I like it dirty.
MONICA: Well, I thought that I would cut up the tomatos.
MONICA: Actually, I was gonna do them jullienne.
ROSS: Y-ello. No, Rachel's not here right now, can I take a message? Alright, and how do we spell Casey, is it like at the bat or and the Sunshine Band? OK, bye-bye. Hey, who's this uh, this Casey?
ROSS: [puts the message in the cupboard] I don't know, I don't get, I don't get it, I mean, wh, wh, two months ago Rachel and I were like, this close. Right now, what, I'm takin messages from guys she, she meets at the movies? I mean this, this Casey should be takin' down my messages, ya know, or, or, Rachel and I should be together and, and we should get some kind of me, message service.
MONICA: Yeah, I think that fifth shower actually got the interview off me.
MONICA: Oh yeah, well there's the possibility that I won't make rent.
ROSS: Monica, if you want, I can lend you some money.
MONICA: No no no, if I couldn't pay you back right away then I'd feel guilty and tense every time I saw you.
MR. GELLER: Well, I can't say any of us were surprised. Your parents have been unhappy ever since we've known them. Especially after that incident in Hawaii.
MR. GELLER: Uhh, naa, no no no, I, I must be thinking of someone else, uh, maybe me. Don't you have some folding to do? Go fold dear. Fold. You fold. [shuffles her into her room]
PHOEBE: OK. Ooh, OK, you gotta give me a second, I wanna get this just right. [she sticks out her gut, clears her throat and sniffs her nose and then in her best male voice. . .] Dude, 11 o'clock, totally hot babe checkin' you out. That was really good, I think I'm ready for my penis now.
CHANDLER: [walks over to the woman] I know what you're thinking, Dave Thomas, founder of Wendy's.
GAIL: I, I really have to be somewhere but it was nice meeting you.
CHANDLER: I pity the fool who puts on my jewelry, I do, I do. I pity the fool that. . . [turns around and sees Joey] Hi. Hey man, we were just doin' some uhh, impressions over here. Do your Marcel Marceau. [Joey turns around and walks out without saying anything] That's actually good.
ROSS: Would you look at that guy, I mean how long has he been talking to her. It's like, back off buddy she's a waitress not a geisha.
PHOEBE: I think she's OK.
ROSS: Oh, oh my God, is this the wrong day? I don't believe it, uh, well, hey, I guess if it works out we'll, we'll have something to tell the grandkids.
ROSS: I was saving you.
ROSS: Oh, see from where I was sitting I uh. . .
RACHEL: OK, Ross, listen to me, I am not yours to save.
RACHEL: No, listen to me. I fell for you and I get clobbered. You then fall for me and I again, somehow, get clobbered. I'm tired of being clobbered, ya know, it's, it's just not worth it.
CHANDLER: Well, doesn't the fact that I wore the bracelet even though I hated it say something about our friendship and how much it means to me?
CHANDLER: OK, well that's the part where I'm a wank. But I was hoping we wouldn't focus on that. [Joey goes to his room and shuts the door] Hey, c'mon man, I said I was sorry like a hundred times, I promise I will never take it off my. . . [notices the bracelet is missing from his wrist] wrist. But if, if you want to stay in there and be mad, you know, you just uh, you stay in there. [he starts searching the room, lifting up the couch cushions]
CHANDLER: I am here, on my knees, holding up these couch cushions as a symbol of my sorrow and regret, much like they did in biblical times. Though you may haveth anger now. . . [Joey returns to his room]
MONICA: No, but that's probably 'cause I haven't asked them yet.
MONICA: Um, yeah, so uh, uhh, listen, I'm sorry I didn't tell you this before but umm, I, I'm no longer at my job, I, I had to leave it.
CHANDLER: I can't believe it.
CHANDLER: Oh, you're right I, I should play in the hay. Forget about the fact that I just dropped 400 dollars to replace a bracelet that I hated to begin with. Bring on the hay. [sits down at the bar]
CHANDLER: What am I gonna do, huh? [Joey walks in behind him]
CHANDLER: No, I can't. No no, listen, I, I know how much this means to you and I also know that this is about more than just jewelry, [puts bracelet on Joey] it's about you and me and the fact that we're [reading bracelet] best buds.
JOEY: Wow, is this friendship? I think so. Check it out, we're bracelet buddies.
ROSS: Yeah, yeah I mean, you get your money and you learn a little something, what's wrong with that?
MONICA: Oh, um, that was my bathing suit from high school. I was uh, a little bigger then.
CHANDLER: Oh, I thought that's what they used to cover Connecticut when it rained.
MRS. GELLER: Over here Jack. OK. I see, Rachel's coming up the path. Oh doesn't she look pretty. Jack, get this. [Rachel enters with a huge nose]
CHANDLER: OK, I was wrong, that's what they used to cover Connecticut.
MONICA: Shoot, I think I got mayonaise on you.
RACHEL: [the shoulders of her dress keep falling off her shoulders] Is my hook unhooked? These things keep falling down, I can't. . .
ROSS: Uh, hold, let me see, I don't know. So what're you gonna do. . . [doorbell rings]
MONICA: I just told Rachel that Roy touched my boob.
RACHEL: I can't go to my own prom without a date, I can't, it's too late.
MONICA: If you're not going then I don't want to go either.
MRS. GELLER: [to Ross on the stairs] I have a wonderful idea. You should take Rachel to the prom.
ROSS: I don't know.
RACHEL: I can't believe I don't get to go to my own prom, this is so harsh.
ROSS: OK, you guys, ya know, I think we've seen enough, let's turn it off.
MRS. GELLER: Oh, dear. Jack, how do I turn this off?
MONICA: I can't believe you did that.
MR. GELLER: I may not know any of your flash dances but I'm no slouch on the dance floor.
Chandler: Yes-yes, I was just trying to figure out a way to uh, demonstrate how I could get my exceptionally large feet into my even bigger mouth.
Joey: (entering) Hey! You guys! Remember that audition I had a while ago and didnt get the part?
Rachel: Honey, might I suggest watching a little more ESPN and a little less E!?
Chandler: No! I want a flabby gut and saggy man breasts!
Rachel: Im sorry Pheebs, I guess Im just really said that Im leaving.
Joey: What are you talkin about? I never left you! Youve always been my agent!
Monica: Im gonna miss you so much.
Ross: Just the one divorce in '99! Y'know what, I am gonna be happy this year. I am gonna make myself happy.
Rachel: I have one.
Monica: I dont think theres anything.
Monica: Not just the phone pen. I never get my messages.
Ross: Fine! Its your life! (Starts to storm out mad about his failed attempt at the manipulation of his best friend and sister, but stops and tries one last time.) I just dont want to see you guys break up! Which you will do if you move in together, (Monica and Chandler just stare at him.) but thats what you want, theres nothing I can do. (Opens the door and tries one more time.) DONT DO IT!!!!! (Finally leaves.)
Joey: And about this Nancy thing... If you're not sleeping with her, should I?
Ross: (to Gary) He told you everything! I mean you totally cracked him!
Ross: Its nothing, I just gave her a hug.
Mr. Heckles: I don't have a monkey.
Phoebe: Umm, okay, okay, look. I took this picture from your fridge. Okay, because I know that this is my Father. Yeah, this is Frank Buffay and you are standing right there next to him. Now, look I deserve to know where I came from. All right? So if you can help me find my Father then you should! Otherwise, youre just mean! (pause) So, just tell me the truth!
Rachel: Come on you guys! What are doing?! I thought we were the patch sisters!
Monica: The babies are asleep, Im sure youll be okay on your own for a while!
Ross: Well, but aren't you pissed at him?! I mean this guy abandoned you! I gotta tell you if this were me, this guy would be in some serious physical danger! (Getting worked up) I mean I-I-I'd walk in there and I'd be like, "Yo, dad! You and me outside right now!" (Calming down.) I kinda scared myself.
Phoebe: Yeah, I think it was better when you guys were sad. Hey, uh, remember the roller blades?
Phoebe: Hey! I call her!
Monica: "Oh my God, I love Ross! I hate Ross! I love Ross! I hate Ross!"
Ross: My Thanksgiving leftover sandwich. I can't believe someone ate it!
Rachel: Ross, things aren't gonna be weird between us, right? I mean was that just the stupidest thing, me telling you that?
Ross: All right, I gotta take off. I'm picking up Ben then we're off to the big audition.
Chandler: Youre right, I have no excuses! I was totally over the line.
Mr. Waltham: Sorry old boy, sorry. Sorry. Sorry. (Them all walk away. As he leaves he mutters to Jack.) I could kill you with my thumb, you know.
Danny: Oh, damn! I got it on my pants.
Chandler: Be-cause, we were talking about ways that he could beat Mike and I told him that Phoebe wanted to get married.
Joey: Come on. This guy's great. His name's Bob. He's Angela's... brother. He's smart, he's sophisticated, and he has a real job. Me, I go on three auditions a month and call myself an actor, but Bob is...
Joey: I dont know how to play Cups.
Monica: Im not talking to her!
Chandler: Ill teach ya! Come on, come on, its really easy and really, really fun.
Ross: The only thing I understand is; postponing it is not an option. This is when were getting married.
Ross: I talked to Monica, look, I'm the one who made the choice. I'm the one who's making things change, so I should be the one to y'know, step back.
Rachel: Im unpacking!
Phoebe: I know, I took it hard too.
Rachel: Ohh, God! Look at him, hes so cute. I wanna go over there, grab him, and kiss him! How can I kiss him and not letting him know that I like him?
Phoebe: I didnt do it! It was Chandler! Hes Hes mad at you!
Rachel: Yeah, Im just mad!
Monica: No Phoebe I am mad!
Monica: (entering) I am not!
Rachel: Uh-huh. (Ross takes off his coat and sets in on a chair.) Yknow what I was, I was thinking about?
Rachel: Well, Phoebe thats fine because Im not moving.
Monica: Well, this is the last box of your clothes. Im just gonna label it, "What were you thinking?"
Joey: (reads it) Oh, I cant believe this! This sucks! When I had insurance I could get hit by a bus or catch on fire, yknow? And it wouldnt matter. Now I gotta be careful?!
Rachel: Yeah, I do. I-I do, do that.
Monica: When I take a shower, she leaves me little notes on the mirror.
Phoebe: Ohh. Um-hmm. But y'know, she choose to find me. I mean, I have to respect her decision. Right?
Rachel: Well yknow, I dont want you to be cold.
Phoebe: Okay Rachel, I cant wait to live with you! And you know what we should do? Bring Monica and then we could all live there together! Well have so much fun!!
Rachel: Yeah but-but-but you liked me! Oh my God, I cant believe this, all this time, I liked you and you liked me!
Phoebe: Thats nice. I like having things to read in the bathroom.
Chandler: I cant take the big white dog! You love it!
Chandler: When did I try to give you money?
Monica: (entering) Okay, I talked to the guy with the shovel and I found out what happened.
Chandler: Im just trying to help you out! Okay? I wanna make sure that youre okay.
Monica: Im really gonna miss you.
Joey: No-no, this only took five minutes. I spent the rest of the day coming up with new, Ultimate Fireball. (Takes out a bowling ball and a propane torch.) Ha-ha!
Monica: Can I ask you a question?
Tour Guide: Maybe its crazy in a perfect world, a world without lab coats and blazers, but you not in a perfect world, you in a museum now. See that scientist in the classes, he and I used to play together all the time in grade school, but now (Turns around) Peter! Hey, Peter! Its me Rhonda! From PS-129! I shared my puddin which you man! I gave you my Snack Pack! (to Joey) See, he pretend he dont even here me!
Ross: (stops her) Wait uh, listen. I-I, I have to tell you something. Umm, Ive been thinking, Im just gonna come out and say it. Okay? I-I-I ah, I-I think I love you.
Ross: Ah, no Mon, Dad had to buy everyone of your boxes because you ate them all. But ah, y'know Im sure thats not gonna happen this time, why dont I put you down for three of the mint treasures and just a couple of the Rudolphs.
Chandler: Its not a real game! I made it up!
Joey: Hey, I wasn't the only one who looked like an idiot. All right? Remember when Ross tried to say, "Butternut squash?" And it came out, "Squatternut buash?"
Monica: I know, I just thought it would be fun.
Joey: Well, anyway, I got to go change, Im ah, meeting some of the cast for drinks.
Chandler: (not amused) And I just realized I can sleep with my eyes open.
ESTELLE: Joey, I'm gonna tell you the same thing I told Al Minser and his pyramid of dogs. Take any job you can get and don't make on the floor.
Monica: (entering, happily) All right everybody! Everybody guess what? I just convinced Paul to give us a test next week!
JOEY: Incredible! I met the director this time and you'll never believe who it was.
Rachel: Honey, y'know I just gotta tell you, I think this is such a terrific thing you're having these babies for Frank and Alice.
Joey: I didn't know that! Well, what a pretty last name!
Joey: Of course I did.
Joshua: Thanks. (He starts to leave) Maybe Ill see in the spring, with the uh, yknow, for the uh, bathing suits.
CHANDLER: Hey, look Joey, I'm just saying if you need something to hold you over, I can get you a job right here as an entry level processor.
Joey: I'm saying maybe you and I crank it up a notch.
Rachel: Oh! I used to do that too!
Monica: Drunk enough to know that I want to do this. Not so drunk that you should feel guilty about taking advantage.
Rachel: You're right, you're right. I should just tell her the truth.
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, (Ohh, thats the last time Im ever gonna type that line. Its just so sad.) Joey is entering, angrily.]
Monica: I don't know. Rachel I'm-I'm sorry that I hurt your ankles.
Joey: Can I see the comics?
Chandler: Oh my God! If you say that one more time, Im gonna break up with you!
Joey: (jumps out of the box) I Gotcha!!
Rachel: It's not here Pheebs, it's not here. Ohh, I went to Joey and Chandler's last night! Okay! (Goes to the door.)
Monica: Yeah hey, a weird thing happened today whey I was at brunch. This woman overheard that I was marrying you and-and then she she wished me good luck.
Chandler: We cant do that thats insane. I mean A he could wake up and B yknow, lets go for it.
Phoebe: Please Rachel, I am not an idiot. (Runs off)
Ross: Not the first two, but the second two- woooo! ...I love you guys. You guys are the greatest. I love my sister (Kisses Monica), I love Pheebs... (Hugs her)
JOEY: Uh, well, kinda yeah. Like, remember last week when Alex was in the accident? Well the line in the script was, 'If we don't get this woman to a hospital, she's going to die.' But I made it, ' If this woman doesn't get to a hospital, she's not gonna live.'
Monica: I don't know, how about the idiot who thought he could drive from Albany to Canada on a half a tank of gas!
Chandler: Buh-bye. (Hangs up the phone) I just got us reservations at Michelles and tickets to the Musicman to celebrate our first holiday season as a betroughed couple.
Rachel: I love him. Hes so pretty I wanna cry! I dont know what to do. Tell me what to do.
Monica: Does she use the cups? Yes! I believe she does. Does she use the plates? Yes! I believe she does. (Looks at the wedding dress and stops.)
Jason: Yeah. I mean y'know, we havent been going out that long. Come on, we havent even slept together yet. Huh.
Phoebe: Oh, I get more because Im dainty.
Ross: No, I dont want to hit you.
Monica: Terrible. If-if I want something done right, I have to do it myself. Other people just wreck stuff. I really think I might kill someone tonight.