words in movies
Rachel: I know, it's huge, and it's scary, and it's... really far, far away from you guys, but this is such an incredible opportunity for me. And I've already talked to them about our situation with Emma, and they said they'll do whatever we need to make us feel comfortable.
Rachel: I mean, I'll fly back and forth, they'll fly you out... Anything we want.
Chandler: My boss said I might be getting a new lamp in my cubicle. (Monica looks at him and can't really place what he just said)
Rachel: I think it is. (Ross looks very sad. Phoebe and Joey enter.)
Rachel: I got a really incredible job offer.
Joey: Well, it comes and goes. I wouldn't trust it.
Chandler: I see.
Ross: Well, Rachel moving to another country? Not being able to see her every day. How can I be okay with this?
Monica: I know, but what are we gonna do? She really needs this job.
Ross: I don't know. I could talk to her boss. Yeah! I met him at that Christmas party. We really hit it off.
Ross: I didn't say we were brothers.
Monica: Hey Phoebe. Hey, tell me what you think. All right. The house next door to the one that we're buying in Westchester? Just went on the market. I wanna take a look at it, but Chandler doesn't.
Phoebe: Well, I think that shirt makes you look like you should work at a Baskin Robbins... Anyway... Hey, isn't Joey's agent Estelle Leonard?
Phoebe: Yeah, last Saturday. Wow! She was the first black man to fly solo across the Atlantic. (Chandler and Monica look puzzled) Oh, wait a minute, I read the wrong one.
Chandler: I know. *He* always wanted to be the first black man to cross the Atlantic.
Chandler: Unless Snoopy says it to Charlie Brown, I think we're okay.
Mr Zelner: Uh... What can I do for you?
Ross: Oh, no. At first I have to get you to agree. Then we'll see if she wants to come back.
Ross: (surprised) Huh, I took a shot there.
Mr Zelner: But I'm sorry. There's nothing I can do... Ah, it's not true, there is... nothing I want to do.
Ross: I see... Thanks very much. (he gets up and walks to the door. On his way out he looks at the photographs Mr Zelner has near his door. He picks one up.) Is this your son?
Ross: How would he like to come with me to the Museum of Natural History after everyone else has left, just the two of us, and he can touch anything he wants. (Mr. Zellner looks shocked). I just heard it as you must have heard it and that’s not good. Let me start again. I’m a paleontologist, you’ll be there with us and the touching refers only to bones… fossils!
Mr Zelner: Well, I guess having Rachel back wouldn’t be the worst thing in the world.
Ross: Yeah! Yes! Thank you! This is great. Thank you so much. And I swear, your kid is going to have the time of his life.
Mr Zelner: That’s great. I worry about little Ross. He’s always reading, he's collecting rocks and he’s obsessed with dinosaurs.
Joey: I’m just mad at my agent.
Joey: There’s a part in a TV movie that I would be perfect for and I didn’t even be put up for it! She’d better have a good reason.
Phoebe: I’m guessing she does.
Joey: Well (taking his cell phone out of a pocket) I’m wanna hear it, because she keeps doing this.
Phoebe: Well, no, no, wait, wait, wait. All right, I gotta go. Just listen. Promise me, that you will wait a minute before you call her.
Joey: I love that saying!
Joey: I was just gonna call you! That’s weird.
Phoebe-Estelle: It’s a little coincidental, but believable. (Joey nods in agreement). Listen, I’m sure you’re wondering why I didn’t get you an audition for that TV movie.
Joey: Yeah, actually I am!
Phoebe-Estelle: I guess I dropped the ball there. Whoopsie!
Joey: No, no, look. All I’m saying is that you’re my agent, ok? And you’re not getting me into any auditions and I’m tired of it.
Joey: I’m saying that… (pause). This isn't working for me anymore, ok? Estelle, you’re fired. Goodbye. (he hangs up the phone).
Rachel: Yee. I mean, it was so weirdest thing. They fired me and then out of nowhere they just hire me back! I mean, that place must have been falling apart without me.
Rachel: No, I’m still going.
Lady: Oh, sure. I’m showing it to someone else right now, but please, look around.
Lady: Well, we already have one offer on it, and I think the lady upstairs is goning to make another one.
Joey: Yeah, I just… I just feel bad about firing Estelle. This is got to be killing her.
Joey: I don’t know. She’s got to be taking it hard, I was like her only client. Except for this guy who eats paper. And I’m guessing he eats more money than he makes. Look, I know she’s not a great agent, but she did stick with me for ten years. I’m gonna call her and hire her again.
Joey: I promise. And that means, never having to give a reason. (Phoebe stops herself from laughing and leaves)
Chandler: And yet I never run into Beyonce!
Monica: (looks confused and scared) I don't know why.
Janice: Ooh, that decides it then. I was on the fence. But knowing that you two would be our neighbors? Ah! now we have to get it! (Chandler and Monica are utterly shocked) Ellen, we're going to talk numbers. (Grabs Ellen by her elbow and pulls her outside)
Chandler: That is a great idea! And by the way, I don't mean to sound distasteful, but when did you start crapping money!?
Monica: Okay, but if we don't get this house, she's stil gonna show up wherever we go! I mean, at least if she's here, it eliminates the element of suprise. I mean, never again will you have to hear the three words that make your balls jump back up inside your body. (She shows this with her index finger, mimicking it pushing something up)
Ross: (enters) It's me. Ron. (Mr. Zellner looks annoyed) Look, I um, I now Rachel turned you down but I think there is a way you might be able to get her to come back.
Ross: Perhaps I can persuade you. What if you can give your son this (Takes a huge egg out of his back) genuine pterodactyl egg (whispers) replica.
Mr Zelner: (looks at Ross, for a long moment, confused) I meant with my son.
Phoebe: Yeah, I wanted to call and tell you that there's no hard feelings for firing me.
Joey: (still scared) Ok-ay. I just, I can't believe you're calling me?
Phoebe: Well, I didn't think I should just drop by...
Joey: Can I ask you something? Uhm, what's it like there?
Phoebe: (Looks around) It's alright. Look kiddo, I gotta go. Good luck with the career. You're gonna be huge.
Janice: All right, I got to run. Tell Monica I say goodbye. And... I'll see you later, neighbor. (Janice laugh)
Chandler: Wait! I just want you to know that... I'm so happy you're going to be here.
Chandler: I never stopped loving you.
Chandler: Yeah, yeah, yeah! I want you... I need you... I must have you Janice Litman Goralnik Neihosenstein.
Janice: I don't know what to say... I mean, you know, obviously we have this... heat between us.
Janice: But I love my husband. And I know you love your wife. Now, I don't think we should get this house now.
Chandler: I understand.
Rachel: Yeah. It was the weirdest thing. Zelner called me and he said we'll do everything we can to get you back. And that I should thank some Ron... I don't even know what department that guy's in.
Rachel: Well, I took it.
Rachel: Yeah, you know, was I looking forward to going to Paris? Sure. You know, was I excited about working in the fashion capital of the world? Ooh, absolutely... Oh...! Yeah, but you know, this is... it's fine. I'm fine going back to a job where I've pretty much gotten everything out of that I possibly can... (she sits down, and Ross who is stunned to hear all this follows her example)
Ross: Uhm, I hadn't no you... I had no idea you were so excited about Paris. Uhm, I mean, you said you were scared.
Rachel: Well yeah, but I mean, it was good scared though, you know? Like when I-moved-to-New-York scared. Or uhm, when I-found-out-I-was-gonna-have-Emma scared... But this is... fine. This is gonna be good. (they both stare around)
Ross: I really do.
Rachel: But I already told Zelner that I would come back...
Chandler: Okay, okay, I tell you what. You roll another hard eight; (pause) and we get married here tonight.
Monica: I've never loved anybody as much as I love you.
EDDIE: I got a little surprise, look. There's a new fishie. I named him uh, Chandler, you know, after, after you.
Danny: Hey guys, I just uh, wanted to invite you to the party tomorrow night.
Monica: I think so too.
Rachel: (entering) You guys, youre never gonna believe what I just found tacked up on a telephone pole! (Shes holding a flyer.) Look kinda familiar?
Phoebe: yeah I've nothing to be ashamed of ok so I haven't been in a relationship that lasted longer then a month. Ok I haven't had a real boyfriend you know if he can't handle that he can leave. which he will and that's ok. so I'll just be alone forever you know alright I'll be. it'll be fine. it'll be fine. I'll go walking tours with widows and lesbians. Oh (takes a deep breath and sits down, knock on the door)
Monica: Of course it was! Trust me, when it comes to psychology I know what I'm talking about. I took two psych classes in college.
Ross: Ohh, it's Joey! I love Joey! (Hugs him.)
Rachel: (worried) Be-cause Ross is the father of my child! You know... and I... want him to hook up with lots of women! (pause) I just... All I'm saying is... I don't think that Joey and Charlie have anything in common.
Phoebe: Well, what am I going to tell Monica? She wants to wear them tonight!
Ross: I wanna get out of the room! Y'know, I I really miss downstairs.
Chandler: Thank you for that! (To Monica) I was not flirting.
The Lurker: I won! That was my quarter!
Dr. Franzblau: I don't know, could be an hour, could be three, but relax, she's doing great. So, uh, tell me, are you currently involved with anyone?
Phoebe: I won! I won! I finally won!
Phoebe: Im so jealous youre all going! I cant believe I never knew that you cant fly in your third trimester!
Monica: You're so efficient. I love you!
Chandler: I don't think so.
Rachel: Oh no, wait a minute, wait, I've got a presentation tomorrow. I can't miss that.
Joey: Get out! I couldn't stop if a meteor hit me.
Ross: Thanks, Gunther. (takes the plate Gunther serves him and Rachel comes up and kisses him) (to Rachel) Hey! (to Gunther) Umm, can I get a napkin too?
MONICA: Your boyfriend has been in there for over an hour. I can't believe it, it's like I'm living with him again. He's here when I go to sleep, he's here when I wake up, he's here when I want to use the shower, ughh. It's like I'm sixteen all over again .
Ross: Oh man! I want that place so much!! I was so sure that was gonna work! There's twelve bucks I'll never see again! (Exits.)
Rachel: Well, it was good.. until we got back to our apartment, and then we were fooling around and he started to put his hand up my leg and I kept slapping it away!
The Security Guard: (To Phoebe) Didn't I just throw you out of here?
The Lurker: I don't want to see you lose a chunk of that pretty blond hair!
Ross: I'm taking my time, alright? I'm laying the groundwork. Yeah. I mean, every day I get just a little bit closer to...
Chandler: Its not just their marriage! I mean, look at yours. Look at everybodys! The only person that can make marriage work is Paul Newman! And Ive met me; I am not Paul Newman. I dont race cars! I dont make popcorn! None of my proceeds go to charity.
JOEY: Yeah, I'll have the Thai chicken pizza. But, hey, look, if I get it without the nuts and leeks and stuff, is it cheaper?
RACHEL: Well, I was thinking maybe a um, a romantic dinner with um, candles and wine and then uh, maybe going back to my place for um, dessert.
Joey: Oh dont listen to him, hes just some guy who really wants the apartment, but I dont think hes gonna get it.
Joey: I don't know, but I don't like what I'm hearing!
Joey: Oh, its a new TV show. Yeah. Im up for the part of Mac Macaveli or "Mac." Yeah, Im a detective and I solve crimes with the help of my robot partner. Hes a, hes a Computerized Humanoid Electronically Enhanced Secret Enforcer or-or "C.H.E.E.S.E."
Rachel: (in disbelief) You WHAT? And I missed it? Because I was giving a makeover to that stupid hippie?
Chandler: (to Joey) I wasnt doing anything. (Joey starts angrily throwing his stuff down.) Uh-oh, what did she do now?
Cop: Yeah, but I kinda don't have a choice, it's my job. I mean, you understand right?
Joey: I dont know how to lead.
Phoebe Sr: No, no, thats just Chuck Magioni, I-I sold him a house last year! And Im very sorry, but I dont know where your Father is, and thats the truth.
Chandler: Oh, that would be Monica. Hey, listen, I wanna borrow a coupla things, Aurora spent the night, I really wanna make her breakfast.
Rachel: Oh! I remember laughing! I laughed a lot.
Ross: Well Im jumping! I have a son! Okay? He wont have a father if-if I die!
Joey: I dont need that anymore.
Janice: Oh, I cannot believe hes using our divorce to sell mattresses.
Paul: And in fifth grade I got into a fight. Well, it wasnt really a fight. Richard Darinvel bit me on the nose and, and I feel down. I still have a little scare right here (points to it) you can see it.
Phoebe: Oh Joey, Im so sorry. You want some of my breakfast?
Joey: Where is the waitress?! Im starving!
Phoebe: I dont know, its such a long trip.
Joey: Listen, do you guys think I have a chance with Janine?
Phoebe: All right. Although I dont think we need one, I never stopped loving you.
Chandler: Listen, I gotta talk to you.
Phoebe: Good! Good! I was just testing you.
Ross: Well, Carol says she and Susan want me to be involved, but if I'm not comfortable with it, I don't have to be involved.. basically it's entirely up to me.
Monica: Yes I do!
Ross: Hey! Oh listen, I was just clearing some space for your stuff.
Rachel: Oh thanks, but listen, I was just at Monicas and she and Chandler had a big fight and theyre not moving in.
Rachel: I thought I was making him filet mignon?
Ross: IThey would not let us get married when we were that drunk!
Rachel: Oh, come on now, dont keep me waiting. Get those clothes off! But, I would keep that helmet on because youre in for a rough ride! (He backs into the door.)
Chandler: Yeah, I wanna go to babe.
Rachel: Ohh, its Joshua invited me to this fancy club opening tonight. But, I already told Mr. Waltham that I would take his niece to this dumb old opera. So What are you gonna do?
Monica: I know I love you! (They hug.)
Chandler: I dont know. But I-I-I know I love you!
Ross: No-no, thats-thats not my thing! I do not love getting divorced!
Monica: (to Phoebe) Remember that guy from cooking school I told you about that put cilantro with everything?
Monica: I wanted it so bad! (Pause) Wanna go pack?
Joey: Really? I dont
Chandler: �Jeremiah was a bullfrog. Was a good friend of mine, never understood a single word he said, but I helped himdrink his wine.� So you just touch yourself for anything?
Rachel: Eh, Im just so sorry I put you through it. And, I y'know, I dont want to get back together over a machine.
Rachel: Fine. Fine, but Ill have you know that once I taught him that stuff he called me Fun Aunt Rachel. And I loved being Fun Aunt Rachel but Ill go back to being Boring and Uncomfortable Aunt Rachel if thats what you want!
Ross: Yeah. Yeah, actually um, I wanted to talk to you about that whole annulment thing?
Rachel: And I will make everyone call me Mrs. Geller!
Rachel: Okay, see now Im scared because I dont actually think youre kidding.
Joey: That thing was a hazard! (To the potential roommate) Im very safety conscious.
Ross: Im asking you to do me a favor.
Chandler: Im not getting into this again!
Joey: Ooh, Ill play! Ill play!
Phoebe: I love the license plate game!
Chandler: Ok, Janice. Janice. Hey, Janice. Look, there's no way for me to tell you this. At least there's no new way for me to tell you this. I just don't things are gonna work out.
David: Where the story was that I was anticipating that I would be around to hear my sons first words spoken. But the scene was about that he wasnt supposed to be able to speak and, uh for some reason when we started doing the show
Ross: I dont know if its true.
Joey: Dont you think I asked him that before he got in?!
Ross: All right. All right, Ill do it.
Joey: Oh, hey, hey, can I give you guys your house-warming present now?
Chandler: Hey, y'know what, maybe we should get going. I mean what time did Chloe say we should be there?
Phoebe: Stop it! Stop it no! Thats not fair! Yknow I cant resist that beautiful voice!
Phoebe: No, as soon as something opens up we'll move right in. Unless it doesn't have a pool, I need a pool. (Turns away from him.)
Ross: Oh, now, don't listen to him, Pheebs, I think it's endearing.
Chandler: Okay. What if we lived together and you understand what Im saying?
Phoebe: I know. But don't you think that it should be called Order and Law?
Phoebe: Hey Mon umm, if you do get married, can I bring two guests?
Chandler: I love you!
Monica: I love you!
Rachel: Man in the black dress (Monica walks away and Rachel looks around to find a woman in a black dress.) (To her) Hi! Im Rachel! Im a friend of Monica and Chandlers!
Monica: Wait! Oh my God! I cant get out!
Phoebe: No thanks, Ive already seen one.
Rachel: No, actually I took it off then I drew it back on.
Monica: No, they gave us glasses with lipstick on them! I mean, if they didn't change the glasses, who knows what else they didn't change. (He glares at her.) Come on sweetie, I just want this weekend to be perfect, I mean we can change rooms, can't we?
Joey: Im not finished.
Monica: I think so. Se, he-he's not inviting you to his party because he likes you.