words in movies
Rachel: I know, it's huge, and it's scary, and it's... really far, far away from you guys, but this is such an incredible opportunity for me. And I've already talked to them about our situation with Emma, and they said they'll do whatever we need to make us feel comfortable.
Rachel: I mean, I'll fly back and forth, they'll fly you out... Anything we want.
Chandler: My boss said I might be getting a new lamp in my cubicle. (Monica looks at him and can't really place what he just said)
Rachel: I think it is. (Ross looks very sad. Phoebe and Joey enter.)
Rachel: I got a really incredible job offer.
Joey: Well, it comes and goes. I wouldn't trust it.
Chandler: I see.
Ross: Well, Rachel moving to another country? Not being able to see her every day. How can I be okay with this?
Monica: I know, but what are we gonna do? She really needs this job.
Ross: I don't know. I could talk to her boss. Yeah! I met him at that Christmas party. We really hit it off.
Ross: I didn't say we were brothers.
Monica: Hey Phoebe. Hey, tell me what you think. All right. The house next door to the one that we're buying in Westchester? Just went on the market. I wanna take a look at it, but Chandler doesn't.
Phoebe: Well, I think that shirt makes you look like you should work at a Baskin Robbins... Anyway... Hey, isn't Joey's agent Estelle Leonard?
Phoebe: Yeah, last Saturday. Wow! She was the first black man to fly solo across the Atlantic. (Chandler and Monica look puzzled) Oh, wait a minute, I read the wrong one.
Chandler: I know. *He* always wanted to be the first black man to cross the Atlantic.
Chandler: Unless Snoopy says it to Charlie Brown, I think we're okay.
Mr Zelner: Uh... What can I do for you?
Ross: Oh, no. At first I have to get you to agree. Then we'll see if she wants to come back.
Ross: (surprised) Huh, I took a shot there.
Mr Zelner: But I'm sorry. There's nothing I can do... Ah, it's not true, there is... nothing I want to do.
Ross: I see... Thanks very much. (he gets up and walks to the door. On his way out he looks at the photographs Mr Zelner has near his door. He picks one up.) Is this your son?
Ross: How would he like to come with me to the Museum of Natural History after everyone else has left, just the two of us, and he can touch anything he wants. (Mr. Zellner looks shocked). I just heard it as you must have heard it and that’s not good. Let me start again. I’m a paleontologist, you’ll be there with us and the touching refers only to bones… fossils!
Mr Zelner: Well, I guess having Rachel back wouldn’t be the worst thing in the world.
Ross: Yeah! Yes! Thank you! This is great. Thank you so much. And I swear, your kid is going to have the time of his life.
Mr Zelner: That’s great. I worry about little Ross. He’s always reading, he's collecting rocks and he’s obsessed with dinosaurs.
Joey: I’m just mad at my agent.
Joey: There’s a part in a TV movie that I would be perfect for and I didn’t even be put up for it! She’d better have a good reason.
Phoebe: I’m guessing she does.
Joey: Well (taking his cell phone out of a pocket) I’m wanna hear it, because she keeps doing this.
Phoebe: Well, no, no, wait, wait, wait. All right, I gotta go. Just listen. Promise me, that you will wait a minute before you call her.
Joey: I love that saying!
Joey: I was just gonna call you! That’s weird.
Phoebe-Estelle: It’s a little coincidental, but believable. (Joey nods in agreement). Listen, I’m sure you’re wondering why I didn’t get you an audition for that TV movie.
Joey: Yeah, actually I am!
Phoebe-Estelle: I guess I dropped the ball there. Whoopsie!
Joey: No, no, look. All I’m saying is that you’re my agent, ok? And you’re not getting me into any auditions and I’m tired of it.
Joey: I’m saying that… (pause). This isn't working for me anymore, ok? Estelle, you’re fired. Goodbye. (he hangs up the phone).
Rachel: Yee. I mean, it was so weirdest thing. They fired me and then out of nowhere they just hire me back! I mean, that place must have been falling apart without me.
Rachel: No, I’m still going.
Lady: Oh, sure. I’m showing it to someone else right now, but please, look around.
Lady: Well, we already have one offer on it, and I think the lady upstairs is goning to make another one.
Joey: Yeah, I just… I just feel bad about firing Estelle. This is got to be killing her.
Joey: I don’t know. She’s got to be taking it hard, I was like her only client. Except for this guy who eats paper. And I’m guessing he eats more money than he makes. Look, I know she’s not a great agent, but she did stick with me for ten years. I’m gonna call her and hire her again.
Joey: I promise. And that means, never having to give a reason. (Phoebe stops herself from laughing and leaves)
Chandler: And yet I never run into Beyonce!
Monica: (looks confused and scared) I don't know why.
Janice: Ooh, that decides it then. I was on the fence. But knowing that you two would be our neighbors? Ah! now we have to get it! (Chandler and Monica are utterly shocked) Ellen, we're going to talk numbers. (Grabs Ellen by her elbow and pulls her outside)
Chandler: That is a great idea! And by the way, I don't mean to sound distasteful, but when did you start crapping money!?
Monica: Okay, but if we don't get this house, she's stil gonna show up wherever we go! I mean, at least if she's here, it eliminates the element of suprise. I mean, never again will you have to hear the three words that make your balls jump back up inside your body. (She shows this with her index finger, mimicking it pushing something up)
Ross: (enters) It's me. Ron. (Mr. Zellner looks annoyed) Look, I um, I now Rachel turned you down but I think there is a way you might be able to get her to come back.
Ross: Perhaps I can persuade you. What if you can give your son this (Takes a huge egg out of his back) genuine pterodactyl egg (whispers) replica.
Mr Zelner: (looks at Ross, for a long moment, confused) I meant with my son.
Phoebe: Yeah, I wanted to call and tell you that there's no hard feelings for firing me.
Joey: (still scared) Ok-ay. I just, I can't believe you're calling me?
Phoebe: Well, I didn't think I should just drop by...
Joey: Can I ask you something? Uhm, what's it like there?
Phoebe: (Looks around) It's alright. Look kiddo, I gotta go. Good luck with the career. You're gonna be huge.
Janice: All right, I got to run. Tell Monica I say goodbye. And... I'll see you later, neighbor. (Janice laugh)
Chandler: Wait! I just want you to know that... I'm so happy you're going to be here.
Chandler: I never stopped loving you.
Chandler: Yeah, yeah, yeah! I want you... I need you... I must have you Janice Litman Goralnik Neihosenstein.
Janice: I don't know what to say... I mean, you know, obviously we have this... heat between us.
Janice: But I love my husband. And I know you love your wife. Now, I don't think we should get this house now.
Chandler: I understand.
Rachel: Yeah. It was the weirdest thing. Zelner called me and he said we'll do everything we can to get you back. And that I should thank some Ron... I don't even know what department that guy's in.
Rachel: Well, I took it.
Rachel: Yeah, you know, was I looking forward to going to Paris? Sure. You know, was I excited about working in the fashion capital of the world? Ooh, absolutely... Oh...! Yeah, but you know, this is... it's fine. I'm fine going back to a job where I've pretty much gotten everything out of that I possibly can... (she sits down, and Ross who is stunned to hear all this follows her example)
Ross: Uhm, I hadn't no you... I had no idea you were so excited about Paris. Uhm, I mean, you said you were scared.
Rachel: Well yeah, but I mean, it was good scared though, you know? Like when I-moved-to-New-York scared. Or uhm, when I-found-out-I-was-gonna-have-Emma scared... But this is... fine. This is gonna be good. (they both stare around)
Ross: I really do.
Rachel: But I already told Zelner that I would come back...
Rachel: I havent seen it yet!
Elizabeth: Yknow what daddy? If you dont like Ross, thats fine. It doesnt matter to me, Im gonna go out with him anyway.
Phoebe: Hey! You guys, Im writing a holiday song for everyone. Do you want to hear it?
Phoebe: No. No, I wont. But I should tell you this, this exact same thing happened to my roommate Denise. She moved in with a guy who was secretly married to her and he said he didnt love her, but he really did, and it just blew up! And thats how she ended up living with me! (Ross looks at her.) (Pause) Okay, thats a lie.
Monica: Yknow, I really have to tell Rachel, but I We just have to get it over with! Yknow, the next time we see them were just gonna tell them. Okay? Thats it.
Ross: I was hugging her as a friend. Its not my fault her-her hair got in my face, shes got a lot of it and it smells all-all uh coconutty. (Phoebe raises her eyebrows.) What?! Oh, that doesnt mean I have feelings for Rachel! Maybe it means I have feelings for coconuts!
Rachel: I was laughing! You made me laugh! (Monica and Rachel start to squabble)
Joey: Look, if Im bringing home a woman who cant stand being around a baby, then maybe I dont want to be with that woman! Or maybe well just do it in the bathroom of the club!
Monica: No! Chandler and I are moving in together!
Rachel: I mean, y'know I'm just gonna have to accept it (She grabs the rest of the pictures)
Phoebe: Guys, Im happy too.
Monica: Well umm, Chandler and I are moving in together.
Monica: I have some pretty exciting news!
Rachel: Yeah, I know, I know, I know he does. But I have to tell him how I feel! He deserves to have all the information and then he can make an informed decision.
Joey: Well, hey! Well... (he takes his mug to toast Phoebe) Here's to Phoebe, who's found the greatest guy in the world! To Phoebe and... (a bit uncertain) I wanna say Mike? (pause) To Phoebe and Mike!
Joey: These new kids, they never last. Sooner or later, they all...stop lastin'. Listen, uh, what do you say I buy you that cup of coffee now?
Rachel: Yes, I was 4 years old and I was on the swing and then all of a sudden my hair got tangled in the chain. And to get me out my mom had to-had to cut a big chunk of my hair! (crying) And it was uneven for weeks!
Rachel: Yeah, yeah and you know what, I know she's gonna wanna run again, I just don't know how to get out of it, I mean, I live with her.
Monica: Ugh, I thought you were Rachel!
Joey: Yeah, well, that's fine, but the important thing is that I finished it. And uh, I think it's really good, but y'know it'd really help me is if I could hear it. So would you guys read it for me?
Monica: I just tell her, I have to get it over with. I told Ross and Phoebe and shes the only one left!
Elizabeth: Yeah! Ive been working so hard this semester. I really need to go crazy yknow, blow off some steam.
Pizza Guy: Yeah. This one goes across the street, I must have given him yours. Oh, bonehead, bonehead!
Phoebe: Well, Susan, I see what appears to be a dark vent. Wait. Yes, it is in fact a dark vent.
Emeril: (on TV.) Now maybe you just like wanna but the whole duck in there! Who cares, y'know? Now I got the legs
Phoebe: Okay, you guys. You guys I think I know whats going on here. Okay, you guys STOP!! (They stop.) I know that, I know that youre acting mad because you think that itll make it easier to leave. But deep down youre still really sad. Deep-deep down.
Phoebe: All right, well, I just can't think about that right now. I just wanna say good-bye to my Grandma.
Ross: Uh, yknow what? Ill tell you who it hurts! It hurts the kid who has all his clothes stolen in gym class so he has to go to the principals office wearing nothing but a catchers mitt!
Monica: Rach, theres something uh, important I have to tell you.
Chandler: I am now!
Monica: Im not your best friend?
Chandler: Okay, a little problem. The key broke in the lock and I cant get in!
Monica: All right, all right, at least Im prepared.
Chandler: Its-its about Kathy. Umm, uh, I like her. I like her a lot actually.
Monica: I made them!
Joey: Well, its not a part, no. Im teaching acting for soap operas down at the Learning Extension.
Monica: So I, I told Rachel it was just gonna be the two of us.
Pete: Okay, thats great, but can we make it smaller? Can we make it fit on the head of a pin? I love when we make things fit on the head of a pin.
Joey: What if I smack my head on the concrete?
Chandler: Okay, I gotta ask, who calls us that?!
Ross: I think just the annulment for today.
Russell: (interrupting) Im sorry, is this the same Rachel whos name you said at the altar in the second marriage?
Russell: I see. Have you considered therapy?
Rachel: (on tape) Ross did I ever tell you about the time that I went backpacking through Western Europe?
Joey: (in a really, really bad Italian accent) That's-ah what I suspected-ah.
Joey: No, it's just ah, I care so damn much about little Ben that uh, it was more important to see him succeed.
Monica: So, howd the lasagne go over? (listens) Really?! Good. So you owe me three pretty things. (listens) Yeah, Ive been thinking a lot about you too. (listens) I know. Its hard this whole platonic thing. (listens) Its a word!
Monica: Hey. So um, I was thinking that maybe we should start dividing up our stuff.
Ross: Ooh! Theres no way to do this without her? Cause I kinda all ready told her uh, it was, it was already taken care of.
Joey: (stopping him) Whoa! Whoa! Whoa! Whoa-whoa! We could have our own show! Y'know we could clap our hands together people will love it! Huh? And-and-and I wrote a song for us! (Singing, to the tune of This Land is Your Land) This hand is your hand! This hand is my hand! Oh wait, that's your hand! No wait, it's my hand!
Rachel: Wow! Mon, thanks! I love this plate!
Monica: (looks around) Well, with all these doctors and nurses, Im gonna say, midget rodeo.
Chandler: I dont know.
Karin: I am so attracted to him right now.
Rachel: But I
Chandler: I think its great. Its great. Yknow, theyre thinking of changing the name of this place.
Joey: Yes! Didnt you ever read Sports Illustrated?! No! I didnt read yours! But come on, we can go to the game tonight!
Monica: I know!
Joey: See? Thats a great smile! Easy. Natural. Now, pretend I have a camera. (Chandler immediately does The Face.) Youre changing it!
Ross: No, I can't. I have back-to-back classes. Did Molly say what she had? Because my throat's been hurting?
Chandler: Yeah, I do.
Rachel: What? Oh my God! Im gonna miss you so much! (Starts to cry.)
Ross: I couldnt.
Ross: I didnt get the annulment.
Ross: We were drunk! I wouldve married uh, Joey with that amount of alcohol!
Phoebe: I knew it! Because you love Rachel.
Monica: Im gonna miss you! (They hug.)
Phoebe: Ive never been more convinced of your love for her.
Ross: I do not have feelings for Rachel! Okay?! (He goes into her apartment.)
Monica: I cant do it. Im sorry, I wish I could, but umm, see you have these feelings for me....
Joey: Come on, Lydia, you can do it. Push! Push 'em out, push 'em out, harder, harder. Push 'em out, push 'em out, way out! Let's get that ball and really move, hey, hey, ho, ho. Let's (notices the nurse looking at him strangely) I was justyeah, right. Push! Push!
Joey's Hand Twin: (To Joey) If you leave now, I will chop off my hand and give it too you!
Rachel: (entering from her room) Pheebs, I wanna ask you something.
Rachel: how about I move in with you?
Rachel: Well since Im movin out and-and youre so beautiful
Rachel: No, I have two sisters. But one of them has a very masculine energy.
Rachel: Anastassakis/Papasifakis wedding, excellent! {Its a good thing Jennifer Aniston is Greek, because she had to pronounce those names. Luckily for me, they were written on a sign.}(The happy couple emerges.) Congratulations. (To the best man and maid of honor) Mazel Tov! (The rabbi emerges.) Hi! Oh, great hat. (Hes wearing an interesting hat and she takes him over to talk.) Listen umm, I need you to perform another wedding. Can you do that?
Rachel: Yeah, yeah I think Im gonna find my own place.
Ross (on the verge of tears): I'm sorry, it must be the pressure of entertaining. I think everyone would feel better if we had some flan.
CHANDLER: Joey, Joey. Hey, some girl just walked up to me and said, 'I want you Dennis,' and stuck her tounge down my throat. I love this party.
Ross: Yeah, kinda. Its this woman from work. I hope that wont be too weird. Will it, Rach?
Joey: Well, thank you. So, can we play 20 Questions now? Ive got a really good one! Ive been thinking about it since Kansas.
Ross: Everyday I am gonna do one thing that I haven't done before. That my friends is my New Year's resolution.
Ross: Look, if she's talking to it, I just think that I should get some belly time too. Not that I believe any of this.
Ross: I.....got.....dressed. Really, really quickly. Okay, okay. (Rachel starts to follow Monica into her room, but Ross stops her and sends her back to her room.) There we go, there we go.
Joey: At least I care about his feelings!
Phoebe: Oh, interesting you should call me that! Now that I may never have one! (Holds up the warning label.)
Mike: I always wanted to play piano professionally, and I figured if I don't do this now, I never will.
Rachel: No-no, Im staying put.
Gunther: I dont know.
Monica: I just can't believe you're in here. I mean, what am I gonna do without you? Who's gonna crash the embassy parties with me? Who's gonna take me to the Big Apple Circus?
Joey: An annulment? Ross! I dont think surgerys the answer here.
Phoebe: Well, you know that psychic I see?
Joey: I cant believe she would say that too you.
Phoebe: (to Bonnie) Well I hope you have fun tonight.
CHANDLER: Oh, come on. I can never get a girl like that with conventional methods.
Chandler: Thats the way I did it til I was 19.
Chandler: Yknow, I cant believe Kathy did this too me. I really, thought that she was the one. I tell you what, from now on Im never getting out of this chair, ever! Okay? From now on, this chair is the one! You wanna what else is the one? My sweat pants!
Monica: (grabs the guitar away from her) No, Phoebe, Ill tell you what, if you get ready now Ill let you play it at the wedding.
Monica: Im fine! I just, Im thinking how much its an end of era.