words in movies
CHANDLER: Alright, alright, but you better be wearing clothes when I open my eyes.
JOEY: I know.
PHOEBE: I can't believe two cows made the ultimate sacrifice so you guys could watch TV with your feet up.
ROSS: This screen is amazing, I mean Dick Van Dyke is practically life-size.
ROSS: [beeper goes off] Yeah, yeah, yeah. I got to get to the museum. So um, I'll see you tonight.
RACHEL: God, oh God Monica, I forgot. This is our first date.
PHOEBE: OK, I can be a waitress, I can be a waitress.
PHOEBE: I can be a waitress. OK watch this. Um, gimme two number ones, 86 the bacon, one Adam and Eve on a raft and rick'em, la-la-la-la-la, la-la-la-la-la.
DR. BURKE: Ah, that's OK, come on in. Um, I'm sorry, is Monica Geller coming? I was told she was.
DR. BURKE: Monica? My God you used to be so. . . I mean you, you, you, you must have lost like. . . You look great.
DR. BURKE: Oh, well obviously you know Barbara and I split up, otherwise you wouldn't have done the head tilt.
DR. BURKE: Yeah, since the divorce, when anybody asks me how I am, it's always with a sympathetic head tilt. [demonstrating] 'How ya doin'? You OK?'
DR. BURKE: No no, it, it's fine, believe me. I do it too. I always answer with the 'I'm OK' head bob. [demonstrates] 'I'm OK.' [tilts head] 'You sure?' [bobs head] 'Yeah, I'm fine.' Hey listen, I've got to set up the music. I got a new CD changer, of course the divorce only left me with 4 CD's to change.
CHANDLER: Uh, two larges, extra cheese on both. But listen, don't ring the buzzer for 19, ring 20, Geller-Green, they'll let you in, OK. If you buzz our door, there's no tip for you. OK, thanks. Pizza's on the way. I told you we wouldn't have to get up.
DR. BURKE: Only because my parents wanted me to be, I wanted to be a sherrif.
PHOEBE: [entering the kitchen from the party] That's funny, no. Cadillac, cataract, I get it, no I get it, you stay out there.
MONICA: I am not.
MONICA: Dr. Burke? I don't think so. I mean, like, he's a grown up.
MONICA: Not never. I mean, I'm gonna see him tomorrow at my eye appointment.
ROSS: I told you there was going to be sub-titles.
RACHEL: I know, I just didn't want to wear my glasses on my first date.
RACHEL: Well it's not, honey I'm sorry, I guess I'm just nervous. I mean, it's you, ya know, it's us. I mean, we're crossing that line, sort of a big thing.
ROSS: I, I know it's big, I just didn't know it was uh, ha-ha big.
RACHEL: I know, I know, I know, I know. I was just thinking about when they were there the last time, I'm sorry. I'm sorry, I'm sorry. OK, OK, look, woah, I promise, I'm good, I'm not gonna laugh anymore. OK put your hands back there.
ROSS: No see now, now I can't because uh, I'm feeling too self conscious.
ROSS: Yeah. I don't know, I've been wanting this since like ninth grade typing, ya know. And I just want it to be perfect and right and. . . why isn't that laser beam cutting through the paint?
RACHEL: Hi. Listen, I was um, thinkin' about. . .
RACHEL: OK, listen, I'm sorry about last night and I really want to make it up to you.
RACHEL: Well, I was thinking maybe a um, a romantic dinner with um, candles and wine and then uh, maybe going back to my place for um, dessert.
ROSS: Humm, that sounds, I don't, perfect.
MONICA: Thanks. So, I guess I better be going.
PHOEBE: You guys are so pathetic, I, oh, OH, XANADU! OH.
ROSS: Oh, I promise, what.
ROSS: Who's Richard Burke? Doc, Doctor Burke? You have a date with Doctor Burke? Why, why, why should that bother me? I, I love that man, he's like a uh, brother to dad.
ROSS: [his beeper goes off] It's the museum again, can I, oh.
RACHEL: When I was um, 7, I crashed my bike right out in front of his house and to stop me from crying he kissed me right here. [points to the tip of her nose]
RACHEL: I know.
ROSS: Oh look, I can't believe this. Look, homo-habilus hasn't even learned how to use tools yet and they've got him here wi, with clay pots. Why don't, why don't they just give him a microwave? I'm sorry, I'm sorry this is taking so long, ya know, I, I, it's just it's longer than I expected, we will have dinner.
MONICA: I thought she just had one.
MONICA: I don't know, maybe. I mean I'm dating a man who's pool I once peed in.
DR. BURKE: I didn't need to know that. I guess 21 years is a lot. I mean, hell, I'm a whole person who can drink older than you.
ROSS: I've no idea, could be. Listen, I'm sorry I had to work tonight. RACHEL: Oh it's OK. You were worth the wait, and I don't just mean tonight. [they kiss] ROSS: You're not laughing. RACHEL: This time it's not so funny. [They kiss and start undressing. As Rachel tries to pull off Ross's tie she catches it in his mouth. Then they roll across the fur rug.] RACHEL: Ah, oh God. Oh, honey, oh that's OK. ROSS: What. Oh no, you just rolled over the juice box. RACHEL: Oh, thank God. [Scene: Museum of Natural History. The next morning Rachel and Ross are sleeping in the display under a fur.] ROSS: Hi. RACHEL: Hi you. I can't believe I'm waking up next to you. ROSS: I know it is pretty unbelievaaaaah. RACHEL: What? ROSS: We're not alone. [A church youth group is outside the display watching them] CLOSING CREDITS [Scene: Chandler and Joey's apartment. They are still in their chairs, watching Beavis and Butthead.] [they're laughing along with the show when an alarm goes off] JOEY: Is that the fire alarm? CHANDLER: Yeah. [feels the floor] Oh it's not warm yet, we still have time. JOEY: Cool.
Phoebe: Oh wait, I change my mind! (She slams the door on them.) Okay, let's talk about the party! I have so many ideas! (Holds up a cocktail napkin.)
Rachel: Yeah, I can do that.
Chandler: Y'know what I just realized? You just freaked out about our relationship.
Ross: Yeah, see, I dont think its gonna that difficult considering this one wont be taking place in the basement of a Pizza Hut.
Rachel: I dont know. Do-do you have any clothes on?
Phoebe: I got it! Mine!
Joey: (Happily) Yeah I did!
The Smoking Woman: I won't! (Turns away) Until I have my next cigarette.
Ross: I don't know. It was incredible. I mean, it just felt so right. When I was holding her, I mean, I never wanted to let her go. You know what? Yeah, I do. I wanna be together.
Monica: (laughs) Yes, I did! And you are welcome!
Chandler: Hey, you have to forget about Elizabeth. I mean if youre not careful you may not get married at all this year!
Kim: Nancy and I were talking about the fall collection.
Nancy: I thought you didn't smoke.
Ross: Yes!! I knew it!! (To the people who didn't make it.) Bye-bye! So long! Later!
Monica: Uh, look, Larry honey, umm, I wrote the book on Section 5 and I know that you don't have to wear your hat unless you're in the kitchen.
Kyle: Oh, oh, I thought we were just talking.
Mrs. Waltham: No, Im bored with you now. Im going to cut you off. (She hangs up.)
Joey: I'm always on the swings! What am I doing wrong?!
Joshua: and even though none of the other kids believed me, I swear to God, that duck pushed me!
Joey: Uh-uh nothing. I-I-I-I didn't want you to touch me cause I'm -I'm all sweaty from the workout. I better hit the shower. (Goes into the bathroom and comes back out quickly) Oh my God!
Ross: Oh yeah? I guess we'll just see!
Rachel: I did not!
Phoebe: Wow! I didn't see that coming! You're-you're asking me out!
Rachel: Oh, yeah, sure. I mean, like in the case of this young woman, she has lost her clothes, so she rides naked on the horse, shes crying out, Where are they, where are they?
Monica: No! To take more pictures of all of us together. I mean I really think it's the best resolution because everyone will enjoy the pictures.
Phoebe: Yeah. I just need you to bring me some photos of Ross.
CHANDLER: Yes, yes I actually saw him leave. I mean that guy is standing in the window holding a human head. He is STANDING IN THE WINDOW HOLDING A HUMAN HEAD!
Ross: Marcel. Bring me the rice, c'mon. Bring me the rice, c'mon. Good boy. Good boy. C'mere, gimme the rice. (Marcel brings the rice) Thank you, good boy. Well, I see he's finally mastered the difference between 'bring me the' and 'pee in the'. (Rachel ignores him) 'Bring me the' and- Rach?
Rachel: What?! Wait a minute! No wait a minute! (She does so.) Okay? Look, that night was the one wild thing I have ever done in my entire life, and Im not gonna let you take that away from me! Okay, so if you dont remember that, maybe you will remember this! (She grabs Melissa and kisses her on the lips.)
Joey: Man, we gotta do something about that guy. This morning, I caught him looking into our apartment. It creeps me out! I feel like I can't do stuff!
Joey: And I was tired from digging the huge hole!
Nancy: Oh, I never could do it.
Ross: Well, uh, uh, I don't know, okay, okay, how about with the, uh, with the baby's name?
Pete: Come on, you gotta admit that our relationship is ah, is hitting a new level now. Cause you used to be like the chef, and I was the customer, and now were like this-this couple that fights.
Chandler: Yeah! (Monica falls asleep) No! No! No! Dont fall asleep! Okay, I am going to make you some coffee. (Monica doesnt move as he gets out of bed and as hes heading for the door.) And I probably wont spill coffee grounds all over the kitchen floor.
Joey: I'm sorry Pheebs, I just, y'know, I just wanted to do a good deed. Like-like you did with the babies.
Ross: (angrily) Ben! (Pause.) (Happily.) I mean, Ben! Ben!
Joey: Oh, what did I say?
Phoebe: I know but I'm having so much fun doing good deeds.
Ross: Im gonna get you to talk to Chandler.
Joey: Hmm, soup. (Pause.) I mean, noodle soup. I mean soup!
Monica: You sat back and let him have her, you didnt fight at all. Am I right? Do you want the same thing to happen with Emily?
Monica: Joey, I thought you were gonna try to be friends first!
CHANDLER: I don't, I hate Joseph, ok. I think he's a brown-nosing suck up.
Phoebe: I mean, well, 'cause when I was growing up, you know my dad left, and my mother died, and my stepfather went to jail, so I barely had enough pieces of parents to make one whole one. And here's this little baby who has like three whole parents who care about it so much that they're fighting over who gets to love it the most. And it's not even born yet. It's just, it's just the luckiest baby in the whole world. (pause) I'm sorry, you were fighting.
Rachel: Yeah, I did, but y'know what? I am really, really trying to cut back, y'know? (Laughs) Good luck, Rach.
Rachel: Yeah, sure. Umm, they didnt have poppy seed bagels, so I (Enters Joannas office and sees her handcuffed to her chair wearing nothing but a slip) Oh my word!
Phoebe: I was in charge of cups.
Joey: Well, may I ask for one example?
Phoebe: Im sorry, I-I-I-I dont live here anymore. I-I didnt know how to tell you, but y'know everybody else knows!
Phoebe: I dont know, I dont know, I dont know. You know, I mean, on the one hand, Mother may I? But yknow on the other hand No. No, I cant. Were friends. No, oh, no. I dont want to risk what we have.
Rachel: All right, would-would you mind just not going out with him again? Okay, just the idea of you and he and all these women, its justAnd I know hes my assistant and I cant date himbut it just bothers me, all right?!
Chandler: (to Kim and Nancy) Oh, hi! Excuse me, is uh Rachel Green here? I was supposed to meet her for lunch.
Chandler: I was not flirting.
Chandler: Im gonna say this for the last time. Would you please just (He moves his arm which opens the drawer and hits in the back of the head, which proves his point.)
Chandler: I was not flirting.
Ross: (happily again) You were worried about me? You didn't know how I was going to react? (He hugs them both.)
Chandler: I was not and oh God, shh!
Chandler: Well you know that thing you said before, I'd be lying if I said I wasn't intrigued.
Ross: Uh actually, I think I'm gonna skip it.
Joey: Yeah, I uh weighted like 27 pounds when I was born so
Monica: So umm, when I was in the shower I was thinking about our first night in London
Phoebe: But I like it here!
Monica: You better believe he's tired, after the day we had! If you know what I mean. You know what I mean?
Rachel: Oh, this is great! I am gonna call him right now! (Jumps up.) Oh, thank you!
Rachel: Because I lose her stuff!
Rachel: Okay, okay, okay, look, just don't freak out, but I kinda lost it. I know it's in the apartment, but I definitely lost it.
Ross: Of course he is! What, do you think Id just use my son as-as an excuse? What kind of father do you think I am?
Rachel: Oh boy, I just can't watch. It's too scary!
Ross: You understand I don't actually like 8-year-old boys.
Monica: I mean I have not been picked on this much since kindergarten and they had to bring in someone from junior high to do the see-saw with me. (Joey laughs and Monica glares at him.)
Ross: I'll get it! I will get that! (Runs over and opens the door.)
Monica: Still, I was quick as a cat.
Mrs. Bing: I am famished. What do I want... (Looks at Chandler's menu)
Chandler: You dont turn and slide, you throw it out! Im tired of having to get a tetanus shot every time I get dressed!
Chandler: I also want you to remember that I let you live here rent free!
Monica: Sure! It doesn't mean anything! Just like I know it doesn't mean anything with you!
Joey: (drinks from the glass and puts it back in the fridge) Yep, it's fat. I drank fat!
Monica: Anyway, were really excited about our wedding plans, and well I guess pretty soon well be making a big withdrawal from the Monica wedding fund. (Chandler and her laugh, but her parents dont.) What?
Monica: Joey, I think you should consider something a little less risky. I mean, I think in this market, real estate is your best investment.The Fed. just lowered the rates and the interest on your mortgage is totally deductible. (looks at Chandler) That's right, I know some stuff!
Chandler: You are incredible. Unless, I�I�m not gonna smoke again. And if I do, I promise, I will hide it so much better from you. (they kiss)
Joey: Soon, soon, I'm gonna be on soon. There I am! (Points to the screen, of course it isn't him.)
Richard: Oh, Im sorry. (Introduces them.) Lisa, (nodding at each) Monica, Chandler. We used to date.
Joey: (angrily entering, to Chandler) Can I talk to you for a second?!
Paul: Well, ever-ev-... ever since she left me, um, I haven't been able to, uh, perform. (Monica takes a sip of her drink.) ...Sexually.
Phoebe: Ohh! I did not get that.
Phoebe: I saw it.
Joey: (To Ross in the kitchen) All right, it's another commercial; I still haven't told her!
Joey: I know, I know! What am I going to do? (Thinks) Ooh!
Joey: So youre playing a little Playstation, huh? Thats whack! Playstation is whack! Sup with the whack Playstation, sup?! Huh? Come on, am I 19 or what?!
Ross: I dont know what youre talking about.
Phoebe: I suppose I could tell her it's just all my fault.
Rachel: I don't know, I don't know.
Phoebe: I will replace it, I promise. I feel so terrible.
Phoebe: Umm, Im talking about that which you already know but wont admit. You love her again; you re-love her!
Ross: Oh Ill prove it! Ill prove it like a theorem!!
Monica: (to Phoebe) Oh my God! Did you hear that? She hired me because she thinks Im good.
Ross: I told her I'd have to think about it. I mean, how the hell am I supposed to make this kind of a decision? (They're all quiet.) I'm actually asking you!
Caitlin: I just, I thought Joey was there.
Rachel: Well, I don't get it, but she wanted me to give you her phone number. (Hands him the slip of paper with the phone number on it.)