words in movies
Ross: Chandler!!! Chandler!!! (He opens the door to the apartment but is stopped by the chain; Chandler and Monica quickly stop making out and try to get dressed.) Chandler, I saw what you were doing through the window! Chandler, I saw what you were doing to my sister! Now get out here!
Chandler: (To Monica) Wow! Listen, we had a good run. What was it? Four? Five months? I mean, that's more than most people have in a lifetime! So, good-bye, take care, bye-bye then! (He kisses her and starts to climb out the balcony window.)
Monica: Come on Chandler, come on, I can handle Ross. (They go to the door. Ross is trying to stick his hand through and undo the chain; Monica pushes his hand back.) (To Ross) Hold on! (She opens the door.) Hey Ross. What's up bro?
Chandler: Well, I think, I think Ross knows about me and Monica.
Ross: (To Chandler) I thought you were my best friend, this is my sister! My best friend and my sister! I-I cannot believe this!
Chandler: Look, we're not just messing around! I love her. Okay, I'm in love with her.
Monica: I'm so sorry that you had to find out this way. I'm sorry, but it's true, I love him too.
Ross: (happily) My best friend and my sister! I cannot believe this. (He hugs them both.) (To Joey and Rachel) You guys probably wanna get some hugs in too, huh? Big news!
Ross: (happily again) You were worried about me? You didn't know how I was going to react? (He hugs them both.)
Ross: Hey, you know what I just realized? If you guys ever have kids
Joey: (quickly) I call Godfather!
Rachel: Oh! Oh, I just thought of the greatest wedding gift to get you.
Phoebe: Ooh, I'll go in on that with you! I couldn't think of anything.
Katie: Yeah, I just gotta run to the bathroom.
Joey: I was thinking Chinese food.
Katie: Ohh, I love Chinese! How did you know I love Chinese?! (She hits him repeatedly as she says that.)
Joey: I don't know. I mean I like her a lot, and she's really nice, but
Monica: I know what you need, you need a bodyguard. Hey Ross, what is Ben doing after preschool?
Rachel: Aww, Joey, come here. (She takes his hand.) Look honey, I know this must be really, really difficult for you and I--Oh, I'm sorry. Am I hurting you?
Phoebe: Hey! I brought you some house warming gifts.
Steve: I came to talk to you about Howard.
Steve: Oh, okay, I get it. (Starts to leave.)
Ross: No wait, look. Look! I'm sorry, it's just I've never even met Howard. I-I mean I don't know Howard.
Phoebe: Yeah. I really like his glasses.
Ross: so then President Steve told everyone that I was a cheapskate, and now the whole building hates me! A little kid spit on my knee! Y'know what I'm gonna do? I'm gonna throw a party. That's right. For everyone in the building, and I'm gonna sit them down and explain to them, I am not a bad guy. I am not a cheap guy! I'm just a guy who-who stands up for what he believes in. A man with principles.
Rachel: Okay, I thought it was about your neighbors liking you.
Ross: Oh, they'll like me. Once they come to my awesome PAR-TAY! Okay, I gotta run. I gotta go get some nametags. (Exits.)
Chandler: Very, very funny, but don't say things like that in front of Monica. I don't want you putting any ideas in her head.
Chandler: I don't see it that way. Okay? Because, I see two Monicas, the one that was my friend, who lived across the hall, and wanted to have a lot of babies and then the new Monica, who I just started to date. Now, who's to say what she wants?! Im right. I'm right. Am I right?
Rachel: No, you're right, you are absolutely right. I mean that makes, that makes everything different.
Joey: Uhh, look Katie, uh listen, we-we need to talk. Okay? Umm, look I like you. I-I really do, I like you a lot. Okay? But sometimes when you, when you playfully punch me like that it-it feels like someone's hitting me with a very tiny but very real bat.
Katie: Aww, like I could hurt you. Are you making fun of my size? Don't make fun of me because of my size! (She punches him again and almost knocks him off the arm of the couch.)
Monica: Man, I knew it! I knew you were going to do this!!
Monica: Oh and you know what I want!
Monica: I do not have baby fever!
Chandler: Nah-uh! I know you! Okay? I know the thoughts that you have in the head--in your head!
Monica: You don't know everything. Did you know that I'm going out with Rachel tonight instead of you? Hmm? And did you know that the only baby around here is you?! And did you know that I can't even look at you right now?! (She storms out.)
Chandler: Well, I did not know that.
Chandler: It's gonna be okay, right? I mean she's not gonna leave me? This is, this is fixable.
Monica: Gunther, can I get a coffee (Looks at Chandler) to go?
Chandler: Just tell me what I need to do to make things right.
Chandler: Well, that's what we do. Y'know, I-I mess up and then you tell me how to fix it and then I do and then y'know you think I'm all cute again.
Phoebe: Oh, I thought this was your party and it turns out its a party for Howard. He's just the sweetest little man! (A guest walks up to her.)
Ross: Phoebe! I can't believe you gave them money! I thought you agreed it was totally unreasonable that they asked me for that money!
Steve: Oh hey, Ross. Umm, see, I was thinking maybe you two could switch apartments because Phoebe's more our kind of people. Something to think about. (Walks away.)
Joey: Well look, Im breaking up with Katie so I had to put on some extra padding. Y'know? I mean, if she hits me when she's happy, can you imagine how hard she's gonna hit me when I tell her I'm taking away the Joey love?
Rachel: Oh! Ow! (Joey motions, "You see what I mean?!")
Rachel: Whoa! (Laughs) Y'know what Katie? I gotta tell ya I-I-I-I think you are the one who is too much. (She punches Katie back.)
Ross: Look, this is a disaster! Can't I please just go?
Phoebe: Oh, I was telling them about you and Emily. Y'know, try to get some sympathy.
Phoebe: Yeah, I think I told it wrong. Y'know, we should talk about that because I don't totally understand what happened there.
Phoebe: All right, everyone calm down! Everyone calm down! I have something that I would like to say! Who here likes Ross? (Ross is the only one who raises his hand and Phoebe glares at him to put his hand back down.) Of course you don't like him! He-he didn't give you any money, he raised his own hand when I asked, "Who hear likes Ross," and he's wearing two nametags! (He takes one off.) I-I'll be honest with you guys, when I first met Ross I didn't like him at all! But then once I got to know him I saw that he's really sweet and caring and very generous. I mean, all I'm saying is don't judge Ross before you get to know him all right? I mean, I like all you guys now, but when I first meet you y'know Kurt, I thought, y'know abrasive drunk, umm Lola, mind numbingly stupid! And okay, you guys (She turns to an elderly gentleman and a 20 something woman, who're a couple.) (To the girl) Gold-digger, (To the old guy) cradle robbing perv! So, I think you all know what I mean.
Phoebe: Obviously I didn't think they were gonna start throwing things. I just thought if I kept insulting everyone, you would jump in and defend everyone and then you could look like the hero.
Ross: Oh wow, yeah! See, I did not get that.
Chandler: Where's Monica?! Where is she? I need to talk to her! It's urgent! Is she here?
Chandler: I need to talk to you, it's urgent!
Chandler: Okay, I've been doing a lot of thinking about us, y'know a lot of uhh, us thinking. And uh, well I guess there's only one-one way to do this. (He slowly and awkwardly gets down on one knee.)
Rachel: Ohhhh, I cannot look at it! (She doesn't move.)
Chandler: I don't know. But I know I'm not afraid to do this.
Monica: (kneels with him) Chandler, umm, I want you to take just a minute and I want you to think about how ridiculous this sounds.
Monica: Honey! Do you know that none of that stuff came from me?! I mean I never said I wanted to have babies and get married right now!
Chandler: Yeah I know, but I was really confused and then I talked to these guys. (Turns to look at Ross and Joey.)
Monica: Y'know what? Y'know when I said that I want you to deal with this relationship stuff all on your own? Well, you're not ready for that.
Chandler: I didn't think I was!
Monica: Oh my God, what would have done if I said yes?
Chandler: Well I would've been happy because I would've be able to spend the rest of my life with the woman that I love. Or, you would've seen a Chandler shaped hole in that door. (Points at the door.)
Ross: No, I will not!
Phoebe: Aw, and I was gonna ask you to marry me because I forgot to say hello to you last week.
Rachel: Oh no wait Pheebs, I think for something like that you just ask them to move in with you. But I'm not sure, Chandler?
Monica: Well I think the length of teasing is directly related to how insane you were so, a long time.
Rachel: Wait a minute! Wait a minute! I'm not saying that you shouldnt have a bag, I justit's just there are other bags that are a little less umm, (Pause) controversial.
Rachel: Im just bummed about the way I left things with Ross. I shouldnt have lied to him about having to work. He seemed so mad at me.
Sophie: Hi! I brought you back a macaroon!
PHOEBE: I know who it is you remind me of. Evelyn Dermer. 'Course, that's before she got the lousy face lift. Now she looks like Soupy Sales.
Rachel: Oh, honey, please, no, I can't get started with all that Ross stuff again. I mean, he's gonna screwed up for a looong time. And besides y'know, I don't, I don't go for guys right after they get divorced.
Michelle: No, actually, see I had to pee, �cause I can�t use public bathrooms because the doodie parasites.
Monica: Oh, and by the way, hes lost a bunch of weight. I mean he looks goo-ood! Okay, I mean really, really gorgeous! (Joey clears his throat.) I still love Chandler.
Chandler: What? No, I want to watch this. (He turns on the television and the screen is completely covered in snow). Did your cable go out?
Monica: (on the phone) Hi, who's this? (Listens) Hi, Joanne. Is Rachel working? It's Monica. (Listens) Yes, I know I did a horrible thing. (Listens) Joanne, it's not as simple as all that, ok? (Listens) No, I don't care what Steve thinks. (Listens) Hi, Steve.
MONICA: And I would have to say pah-huh.
Chandler: (entering) Look, maybe I got carried away before. But there's something you gotta know. If I'm the best, it's only because you've made me the best.
RACH: All right, you know what, that's fine. If you guys want to be children about this, that's fine. I do not need to see it. [Rachel grabs the paper and runs across the room, reading it to herself.]
Phoebe: And Tim I just wanna say, good luck here. (Shakes his hand and leaves, which disgusts Monica.)
Joey: Hands! It is absolutely essential that you tell me what room the man my assistant described is staying in. Hes a patient of mine, Ive been treating him for years!
Rachel: (laughs) Yknow when I locked myself in the bathroom at my wedding, it was because I was trying to pop the window out of the frame.
Rachel: I know. Okay. (Whispering and thinking.) Okay. Okay. All right. All right, this is what were gonna do, we are gonna go to the next highest bidder, and we are just gonna let them buy it, and then youre just gonna pay the difference.
Laura: Boy, you people are nice... And I've got to say... I think you're going to make excellent parents.
Phoebe: Yes!! Yes! Yes! Yes!! Thats my Dad, thats Frank! Yeah! Im sorry Im getting all flingy.
PHOEBE: OK. [singing] Smelly cat, smell-ly cat, what are they feeding you? Smelly cat [back up singers start singing smelly, smelly, smelly, smelly behind her] Oh woah, oh my God. I mean like, who was that?
Chandler: Well, I can't say "hump" or "screw" in front of the B-A-B-Y.
Mona: Okay, but I get to hop on after her. (Ross bites the air in response.)
Phoebe: Gosh. Im not gonna let that man make you eat your baby. (They both sit down by the rest of the gang and Phoebe recognizes a man by the window.) Oh. Hey! Who is that guy? I think I know him.
Rachel: (opens her present from Ross; it's a dark-red scarf) Oohh, I love it!
Ross: Im telling you. Im telling you. Thats what it is. No wonder she was looking at me all funny during the wedding. She didnt say anything to you?
RACH: Ok, he's goin' to get my coat. He's goin' to get my coat. Oh my god, you guys. I can't believe this. This is unbelievable. [notices Chandler's computer screen] What's that?
Ross: Look Carol umm, I was, I was thinking maybe uh, maybe we can spice things up a little.
Rachel: Well is it fair that all you did was put on a cape and I gotta give you free stuff?
Ross: I know. A double blind date, and we both get stood up. What are the chances?
Rachel: (Into the phone) Hello? (announces to Amy) Oh, it's our nanny! (goes back to the phone conversation) Hi! Oh... God! I hope you feel better! Ok, bye! (Hangs up) (To Ross) That's Molly, she's sick. Can you watch Emma today?
Phoebe: Concert. Yeah. That does put us in quite a pickle. Because you see Im very busy before and after the concert, and hes obviously busy during.
Ross: Oh, I just thought we could go out to dinner, and then maybe bring her back to my place and I'd introduce her to my monkey.
ROSS: I uh, I just got back from uh, from Julie's.
Chandler: Y'know I rued the day once didn't get a whole lot else done.
Ross: Dont ask me, I had it and I blew it!
Joey: Yeah, you've been avoiding her ever since we started going out. Look, I made an effort to like Janice, now I think it's your turn to make an effort to like Kathy by going out to dinner with us. Right?
Joey: Aww man! I cant believe I locked myself out again! (He knocks on the door.)
Phoebe: Well okay, its already February and Ive only given two massages and they were both the worst tippers in the world!
Fat Monica: I know, but y'know, this time you're gonna definitely know whether or not you did it!
Monica: No, last time you said it like Dracula, and it scared her! Can I get you anything? You want some more ice chips?
Phoebe: Im sorry, for the last time, why arent you two together again? (Silence from Ross.) No, I know. I know, because youre not in that place. Which would be fine, except you totally are.
RACHEL: No, listen to me. I fell for you and I get clobbered. You then fall for me and I again, somehow, get clobbered. I'm tired of being clobbered, ya know, it's, it's just not worth it.
Rachel: (starts laughing, Ross stares at her) Im sorry. Im sorry. Youre right, you are a tough guy. Youre the toughest palaeontologist I know.
Rachel: Come on, please?! Im boredddd! You let me do it once before.
Allesandro: How long is this gonna take? Cause I got another critic to go yell at.
Phoebe: I know, I know! I'm like playing the field. Y'know? Like, juggling two guys, I'm sowing my wild oats. Y'know? Y'know, this kind've like y'know oat-sowin', field-playin' juggler.
Chandler: Im only going to pretend Im moving to Yemen, its the only way I can get rid off her.
Chandler: Right! I just think that this is happening too soon.
Joey: Hey. Uh, can I talk to you for a second? This, uh, kid in this picture. Do you, uh, know this kid? Is that like a relative or something?
Monica: No, no! We should divide them up (picks up the bowl) and I should get extra because we used my card to buy them!
Phoebe: That was supposed to be a good thing, I forget why. Just listen, Monica, I, do you know, okay, do you know, I couldnt sleep for like a month because I got like a dot of ink on one of the sofa cushions.
Chandler: Actuary... no. Book-keeper... no. Topless dancer... (he looks down on himself, checking, then nods satisfied and marks the offer with a pen) (to Monica:) Hey, d'you know what I just realized? You are the sole wage earner. *You* are the head of the household. I don't do anything - I'm a kept man!
Cop: I don't like looking foolish. Y'know what? Maybe uh, I don't arrest you today. Maybe I came by and you weren't here.
Joey: You know, ah, Ive been thinking about this and I gotta tell ya, its not my fault. Its a natural instinct.
Gavin: Well I don't mind, I'll cancel. I would never miss my secretary's birthday. (leaves)
Ross: Look, I-I know its not a proposal and I dont know where you are, but with everything thats been going on and with Emma and Ive been feeling
Ross: (thinking) Oh. (Pause) Oh! Oh my God! Okay, I know this, give me-give me a second!
Joey: ...I'm his butt double. 'Kay? I play Al Pacino's butt. Alright? He goes into the shower, and then- I'm his butt.
Joey: I didn't have to tell you that!! I'm stupider than Jane Rogers!!
Rachel: (grabs Chandler by the shirt) All right, listen, smirky. If it wasn't for you and your stupid balloon, I would be on a plane watching a woman do this (makes a gesture like a stewardess pointing out exits) right now. But I'm not.
MIKE: (Holds up a six pack of Foster's Lager) I got beer.
Chandler: I used to undress my cousin Glenn. (Monica looks at him then sushes him.)
Phoebe: No Im serious. I mean Im intuitive, but my memory sucks.
Monica: Okay, Ill see you tomorrow! (Doug exits.) Just so you know, were not seeing him tomorrow. (Chandler wonders why.) I-I cannot spend another evening with that man. Do you remember how he behaved at our wedding?
Phoebe: Okay, this is inexcusable. I am shocked to my very core!
Rachel: (humouring him) Oh, well you know who I love the most?
Phoebe: Im not gonna give you tips! Look dont you see that this-this this all came together so that I could stop you from doing this.
Phoebe: I dont accept this rule. When me make plans, I expect you to show up. Okay, I cant just be a way to kill time til you meet someone better! Yknow boyfriends and girlfriends come and go, but this (Motions that their friendship) is for life!
Joey: Oh I-I uh, found the keys and now Im just polishing her up.
Rachel: Ooh! Honey, it can't be that hard, I mean, you've been in love before?
Ross: (yelling in pain) I know nothing! Mike’s a great guy, it was hypothetical!
Chandler: (entering) All right! Okay! I think I am making some progress with Joey, when I went into the apartment he went straight into his bedroom but he only slammed the door once! (Ross is pleased.) I mean yeah, he gave me the finger while doing it.
Ross: Hi! I could help not notice, but that's an unusual necklace
Chandler: Oh, I can't believe my sperm have low motility because, let me tell you, when I was growing up they sure seem to be in a hurry to get places!!
Monica: My God, I cant believe this! I mean I knew that mom and dad were invited, but I thought that was it! I mean from the ages 7 to 9 Frannie and I were inseparable!
Monica: No. He teaches a course on food criticism at the New School, so before we go to the movies I wanna go by there and make him try my bouillabaisse again. Oh, I cannot wait to read the front page of the Post tomorrow! "Restaurant reviewer admits: I was wrong about Monica."
RACHEL: Nothing, I mean, um, it is your first time with her and, you know if the first time doesn't go well, well then that's, that's pretty darn hard to recover from.
Ross: Look, I-I know how miserable you are, I wish there was something I can do. I mean I wish I were a seahorse. (She glares at him) Because with seahorses its the male, they carry the babies. And then also umm, Id be far away in the sea. (He sits back down.)
Rachel: Really?! The Plaza?!! Oh daddy!! (Hugs him and Phoebe glares at her.) Right. Daddy, I need to talk to you. Please, sit down.
Phoebe: (scared) Fire alarm? (She opens the door to reveal a fireman holding the blanket with the smoke detector.) Oh! Hi, officerfireman, can-can I help you?
Phoebe: (joining in) I love Jacques Cousteau!
Rachel: Well, yeah, right, yknow what? Yeah, youre right, I mean, we no, we have our fun. Yeah! But if (Grunts uncomprehensively) I mean, I mean like craaaazy! Yknow? Okay, all right. This is gonna, this is gonna sound yknow, a little umm, hasty, but uh, just go with it. Umm. Ugh. What if we got married?
Phoebe: Okay. Rachel, the hottest babies in the Tri-State Area are in this room right now! I overheard one of the judges say that not one of them holds a candle to Emma!
Rachel: I-I am not uptightHey-hey-hey-oh-oh! Listen, I am not uptight, man.
Phoebe: Ok, you guys, I don’t mean to make things worse, but umm, I don’t want to live with Rachel anymore.
RACHEL: Ohh, thank you for my beautiul earrings, they're perfect. I love you.
Gary: Oh yeah? Well maybe you and I should take a walk through a bad neighborhood.
Rachel: No? So youre saying that if I called it, it wouldnt ring?
CHANDLER: Hey, listen.� I'm never going to lie to you again, okay?� And I want you to know that nobody thinks you're stupid.
MONICA: 'Cause I was going by it the other day and I saw that there was a stock with my initials, MEG, on it and, well, sometimes I have to watch for two or three hours before it comes up again but when it does, it's pretty exciting.
Ross: I find Marions views far to progressionist.
Mr. Geller: Sweetheart, we love you just as much as Ross! Now, Im sorry about everything that happened and Id probably never be able to make it up to you, but heres a start. (He hands her a small box.)
Rachel: Oh, I dont know, I guess, Chris ODonnel, John F. Kennedy, Jr., Daniel Day Lewis, Sting, and Parker Stevenson.
Joey: (taking apart the invitation) Hey, pretty smart! Tissue paper! Youre at the wedding, you have to cry, "Handkerchief?" "No-no, I got my invitation."
Joey: Chandler? Forty-five minutes? Well, something is not right. I just can’t believe he would do this to Monica!
Phoebe: Oh no, no. I can't choose between you two! I love you both so much!
Bill: I know the process is frustrating, but it's so worth it. Adopting Owen was the best thing that ever happened to us.
Joey: We good? Yeah? Good? Once again, I pronounce you husband and wife. (To Chandler) Now kiss her again.
Rachel: Well, for starters I would've said the right name at my wedding!
Jill: Yeah but maybe thats a good thing. Yknow Im doing all these different sorts of things, and maybe I should try dating a geek too!
Ross: Mona? (Theres no answer, so he starts to leave but remembers where her extra key is. He reaches atop a hall light just outside her door and grabs the key. He looks at in triumph as the pain from it being hot moves along his nervous system to his brain, and when it arrives his brain orders his hand to drop the hot key and his mouth to squeal in pain. After dropping the key he pulls his shirtsleeve over his hand and uses the key to open the door and enter Monas apartment.) Okay, if I were a salmon shirt, where would I be? (He hears a key in the door and as it opens he dives behind the couch.)