words in movies
AMBER: I want you Drake.
DR. REMORE: I know you do but you and I can never be together that way.
DR. REMORE: There's something I never told you Amber. I'm actually your half- brother.
JOEY: Well, I get the medical award for separating the siamese twins. Then Amber and I go to Venezuela to meet our other half-brother, Ramone. And that's where I find the world's biggest emerald. It's really big but it's cursed.
CHANDLER: Ya know Phoebs, don't feel so bad for 'em. After they're done playing, I break out the little plastic women and everybody has a pretty good time.
PHOEBE: Hi, um, I just thought that it would be fun if the three of us had some beers and got to know each other.
PHOEBE: Oh good, ok. Oh nooo, I have to go because I'm late for my um, Green Eggs and Ham discussion group. Um tonight it's why he would not eat them on a train. Have fun bye.
PHOEBE: I know, yeah. Ok, talk to him. [leaves]
CHANDLER: What're you kidding? I broke up with her. She actually thought that Sean Penn was the capital of Cambodia.
EDDIE: Not Sean Penn. Alright, I, I've got a funny one, alright. My last girlfriend Tilly. Ok, we're eating breakfast, right, and I made all these pancakes, there was like 50 pancakes right. And all of the sudden she turns to me, alright, and she says, 'Eddie.' I say, 'yeah,' she says, 'Eddie, I don't want to see you anymore.' And it was literally like she had reached into my chest, ripped out my heart, and smeared it all over my life, ya know. And now there's like this incredible abyss, ya know, and I'm falling and I keep falling and I don't think I'm ever gonna stop. [finishes laughing] That uh, wasn't such a funny story, was it?
PHOEBE: And a crusty old man said I'll do what I can and the rest of the rats played moroccas. That's it, thanks, good night.
PHOEBE: I know.
RICHARD: Um, we should go too, I got patients at 8 in the moring.
MONICA: Ya know, I was thinking. Ya know how we always stay at your apartment? Well, I thought maybe tonight we'd stay at my place.
RICHARD: I don't know, I don't have my jammies.
PHOEBE: Oh, this is so nice. Alright I have to make a speech. I just wanna say that of all the guys that Monica has been with, and that is a lot, I like you the best.
CHANDLER: Oh, uh, he's not here right now, uh, I'm Chandler, can I take a message, or, or a fishtank?
TILLY: I gather by that oh that he told you about me.
CHANDLER: Yes. Hey, can I ask you, is Eddie a little...
TILLY: Eddie, I just came by to drop off your tank.
JOEY: Ooh, I look good.
JOEY: Uh, well, kinda yeah. Like, remember last week when Alex was in the accident? Well the line in the script was, 'If we don't get this woman to a hospital, she's going to die.' But I made it, ' If this woman doesn't get to a hospital, she's not gonna live.'
PHOEBE: Ohh, ok, I see what you did there. Aren't you afraid though, that the writers are gonna be kinda mad when they read this?
JOEY: I fall down an elevator shaft? What the hell does this mean, I fall down an elevator shaft?
DELIVERY GUY: Uhh, I don't know, I just bring the scripts.
DELIVERY GUY: I don't think that's gonna affect the plot of the show.
MONICA: Well it wasn't that many guys. I mean, if you consider how many guys there actually are, it's a very small percentage.
RACHEL: Hey, it's not that big a deal, I was just curious.
MONICA: Alright, before I tell you, uh, why don't you tell me how many women you've been with.
MONICA: Two? TWO? How is that possible? I mean, have you seen you?
RICHARD: Well, I mean what can I say? I, I was married to Barbara for 30 years. She was my high school sweetheart, now you, that's two.
RICHARD: Woah, woah, no wait a minute now. C'mon it's your turn. Oh c'mon. Ya know, I don't need the actual number, just a ballpark.
RACHEL: Wow, I am so glad I'm not Monica right now.
RACHEL: Oh honey, are you jealous of Paolo? Oh, c'mon, I'm so much happier with you than I ever was with him.
CHANDLER: Eddie, I didn't sleep with your ex-girlfriend.
EDDIE: Oh, this is, this is unbelievable. I mean, first you sleep with my ex-girlfriend then you insult my inteligenct by lying about it and then you kill my fish, my Buddy?
CHANDLER: Hey I didn't kill your fish. Look Eddie...[puts his hand on Eddie's shoulder] Would you look at what I'm doin' here. That can't be smart. So we're just gonna take this guy right off ya and put him here in Mr. Pocket. Tangellon? [picks up the fruit an tosses it to Eddie, it hits Eddie in the chest and falls]
RICHARD: Well, that's not bad at all. I mean, you had me thinkin it was like a fleet.
MONICA: And, well, don't you have a lot of wild oats to sew? Or is that what you're doing with me? Oh my God, am I an oat?
RICHARD: Honey, you are not an oat. I, I mean I don't know, I, I guess I'm just not an oat guy. I've only slept with women I've been in love with.
MONICA: Wow. Oh wow. You know I love you too, right.
RICHARD: Now I do. [they kiss and fall to the bed]
RACHEL: Ross, Ross, please listen to me. Ross, you are so much better for me than Paolo ever was. I mean you care about me, you're loving, you make me laugh.
ROSS: Oh, hey, if I make you laugh, here's an idea, why don't you invite Paulo over and have a little romp in the sack and I'll just stand in the corner and tell knock-knock jokes.
RACHEL: God, Ross, look, what you and I have is special, all Paolo and I ever had was...
ROSS: Animal sex, animal sex? So what're you saying, I mean, you're saying that like, there's nothing between us animal at all. I mean there's not even like, uhm, a little animal, not even, not even like, like chipmunk sex?
RACHEL: Ok, Ross, try to hear me. Ok, I, hey, I'm not gonna lie to you. Ok, it was good with Paolo.
RACHEL: But, what you and I have is so much better. Ok, we have tenderness, we have intimacy, we connect. Ya know, I swear, this is the best I have ever had.
MONICA: I know. I just can't find...
RICHARD: I have a little comb.
RACHEL: Ok, I, I will do your laundry for one month.
RACHEL: Ok, ok, ok, I will, I will, I, hey, I will clean the apartment for two months.
MONICA: Alright, I tell you what, I'll give this to you now if you can tell me where we keep the dustpan.
RICHARD: Uh, in the future, if I could see the schedule beforehand...
CHANDLER: So, when I woke up this morning, he'd stolen all the insoles out of my shoes.
CHANDLER: Because he thinks I slept with his ex-girlfriend and killed his fish.
DR. REMORE: Amber, I want you to know that I'll always be there for you, as a friend and as your brother.
DR. REMORE: Some guys are just lucky I guess.
DR. REMORE: Well then, uh, I uhh, guess that's me. Anyone else need to go on the elevator? Dr. Horton, Dr. Wong?
AMGER: I love you Drake.
JOEY: I don't feel like talkin.
JOEY: I don't know, I was kinda hopin' no one would ever find out.
PHOEBE: Yes, I was going to incorporate that. Oh good, here's Monica, she'll have something nice to say.
MONICA: Um, I straightened out your shower curtain so you won't get mildew. What? To me that's nice.
JOEY: No, I don't. It's like, ya know, you work your whole life for somethin' and you think that when you get it it's never gonna be as good as you thought it would be. But this so was. Ya know, it changed everything. Like the other day, I got this credit card application, and I was pre- approved. Huh? I've never been pre-approved for anything in my life.
RACHEL: Yeah, Joey honey, I don't know if this'll mean anything to you but you'll always be pre-approved with us.
EDDIE: I got a little surprise, look. There's a new fishie. I named him uh, Chandler, you know, after, after you.
Monica: I don't know. Rachel I'm-I'm sorry that I hurt your ankles.
Joey: Can I see the comics?
Chandler: Oh my God! If you say that one more time, Im gonna break up with you!
Joey: (jumps out of the box) I Gotcha!!
Rachel: It's not here Pheebs, it's not here. Ohh, I went to Joey and Chandler's last night! Okay! (Goes to the door.)
Monica: Yeah hey, a weird thing happened today whey I was at brunch. This woman overheard that I was marrying you and-and then she she wished me good luck.
Chandler: We cant do that thats insane. I mean A he could wake up and B yknow, lets go for it.
Phoebe: Please Rachel, I am not an idiot. (Runs off)
Ross: Not the first two, but the second two- woooo! ...I love you guys. You guys are the greatest. I love my sister (Kisses Monica), I love Pheebs... (Hugs her)
Monica: I don't know, how about the idiot who thought he could drive from Albany to Canada on a half a tank of gas!
Chandler: Buh-bye. (Hangs up the phone) I just got us reservations at Michelles and tickets to the Musicman to celebrate our first holiday season as a betroughed couple.
Rachel: I love him. Hes so pretty I wanna cry! I dont know what to do. Tell me what to do.
Monica: Does she use the cups? Yes! I believe she does. Does she use the plates? Yes! I believe she does. (Looks at the wedding dress and stops.)
Jason: Yeah. I mean y'know, we havent been going out that long. Come on, we havent even slept together yet. Huh.
Phoebe: Oh, I get more because Im dainty.
Ross: No, I dont want to hit you.
Monica: Terrible. If-if I want something done right, I have to do it myself. Other people just wreck stuff. I really think I might kill someone tonight.
Phoebe: Yeah, you know what the best part of it is? I get to do my "plan-laugh." (A maniacal laugh follows.)
Ross: I don't even wanna know about the dark cheese.
David: No, but I can't-
Joey: I dont know! How about, "Thanks for taking the message." Jeez! (Exits.)
Ross: Look, all I know is I-I cant have another failed marriage!
Joey: Ooh, its probably a residual check, hey can you open it for me, Im kinda .
Chandler: Well, I think, I think, Ross already has one. Now, this ones free, right? Because you paid for the first two, so the third ones free.
Chandler: I see, I see, y-y-you're trying to freak me out.
Rachel: Hey Phoebe, can I talk to you for a second?
Chandler: Yeah, Monica doesn't like that either, Maybe I should stop doing that.
Chandler: Yes, but I feel like Ive really gotten in touch with my feminine side enough today. You know. In fact I think were two sachets away from becoming a lesbian couple.
Chandler: Man, I'm so lucky I have Monica.
Joey: (standing up) I will sit with you Dr. Geller. (He goes over to his table and they shake hands.)
Chandler: (coming all the way in) Listen, I just wanted to apologize about this afternoon and the whole massage thing. Y'know? I-I really like 'em.
Joey: Oh this is great! I might actually get to play Ben's dad!
Ross: Well, I wanted to be thorough. I mean this-this is clearly very, very important to you, to us! And so I wanted to read every word carefully, twice!
Chandler: I know.
Chandler: Why?! I mean if this guy was me and it was me who had learned that it was me who was the best you'd ever had, I'd be going like this. (He jumps up onto the table and starts doing his happy dance.)
Chandler: (to Ross) I couldn't say that I was naked because she's allowed too see me naked.
Ross: Who cares? I repel women.
Will: Uh, except that it was really the I Hate Rachel Club.
Joey: I got this pair marked excess, I gotta tell ya, there was no room for excess anything in there.
Janine: Sure, listen I was gonna order some pizza, you wanna share one?
Rachel: Pheebs, Monica tripped me, I don't think I can ever run again, ever!
Janine: I don't think so.
Ross: Well remember that paper I had published last year on sediment flow rate, huh? They loved it.
Chandler: Oh that's so cool! Why would a cop come in here though? They don't serve donuts. (No one laughs.) Y'know what actually, could you discover the badge again? I think I can come up with something better than that.
Joey: (on phone) Yeah, hi. You guys got any of those baby chicks? Cause I was watching this ah, commercial on TV and man, those guys are cute!
Ross: (on the phone) Ive been thinking, this is crazy, I mean dont, dont you think we can work on this?
Chandler: Well, I believe the piece of furniture was fine until your little breakfast adventure with Angela Delvecchio
Janine: Yeah, I gotta go.
Chandler: Well, I guess there's nothing left for us to do but-but kiss.
Ross: I I do, I do not love Rachel. Im gonna tell her right now about the whole thing so we can get this marriage annulled as fast as possible. Okay? Would I do that if I loved her?
Phoebe: I cant believe you didnt tell me there was a suicide note!
JOEY: Yeah, she's totally good looking. I mean, if I met her in a bar, or something, I'd be buying her breakfast. [pause] You know, after having slept with her.
Chandler: Can I check out what she did to my room?
Joey: Im a man.
Woman: I was her accountant four years ago.
Joey: (With Big Eyes.) All right, youre right. Ill talk to her.
PHOEBE: Well, it's not so much that you know, like I don't believe in it, you know, it's just...I don't know, lately I get the feeling that I'm not so much being pulled down as I am being pushed.
Ross: Damn! I thought that was going to be romantic as hell!
Rachel: I did but she doesnt think anyone would be stupid enough to confuse Kenny the copy guy with Ralph Lauren.
Rachel: Phoebe, I mean, you do know hes married?
Monica: I dont think mine likes me either.
Ross: Yay! (To Carol) Seriously, our sex life I was thinking, maybe I dont know, we could try some-some new things. Yknow? For fun?
Janine: No, I just thought it was cute.
Janine: Well I just thought
Janine: Well, Im sorry. I just thought Id try to make the place a little nicer.
Kim: I didnt read it.
Chandler: So you can balloon up or you can shrink down and I will still love you.
Monica: Well, I think I shouldnt look directly at them.
Monica: My God, Rachel, I cant believe Phoebe made out with Ralph Lauren. Ohh, Im so jealous. (Chandler looks at her.)
Joey: No, don't be sorry. I don't need it anymore. I found my identical hand twin!
Phoebe: Oh yeah, okay. I'm uptight. Yeah, that's why I don't want to watch a middle aged guy dance around in what I can only assume is a child halloween costume! (turns to look at Monica and Rachel who look like they feel very sorry for the stripper)
Joey: All right, all right, all right, all right, you wanna know what I do when I take resume shots?
Chandler: I am proud of all my friends today.
Phoebe: (a little freaked out) So! Umm, anyway I-I lived in New York, someone wildly I guess, for ummWell since I was fourteen.
Chandler: Oh, I am no women, but that is one tasty dish. (Phoebe walks in.)
Rachel: That-that is your make out buddy. Dont you recognize him? (Holding up the magazine in front of her face.) Oh wait. Ohh, Phoebe I love you. Kiss me please.
Woman: Great! (Calls down the hall) Dad! (Her old father walks in.) Thank you so much, Ill be back to pick him up in an hour. (She walks away.)
Chandler: Yeah, I know, for a really great stew you just y'know, stick your head in between em.
Emily: I uh, I got it from the gift shop. They have really lax security there. (Chandler is shocked.) Its a joke. (They all laugh.)
Ross: But, wont she notice I have makeup on?
Monica: Im just saying, if we put just a little bit of makeup on you.
Joey: I got it. (catches the ball)
Chandler: Oh, I had an appointment to get my haircut
Monica: All right, half the people. I mean, just try it and see.
Caitlin: No actually umm, I think that they're umm, gas.
Chandler: Yes, God forbid we throw out old underwear. You-you know what? Im going to go over to Joeys.
Charlie: Benji isn't in love with me. I mean, he broke up with me. And besides, he's a very ethical man.
Dr. Green: How about I order everyone the Moroccan chicken?
Rachel: Oh no, no, no. Oh God, you think I made out with him.
Rachel: Monica and Chandler are really moving in here and I have to move out and everything is changing.
Hillary: Come on. I want to know.
Phoebe: But, I need your germs! I want my cold back! I miss my sexy voice.
Joey: I don't know. But I can see through your sheet. (He looks out the window.) Yeah, yeah, that's her. But y'know what? Doesn't matter, I'm never gonna get to meet her anyway.
Joey: No Im not. Why would you say that? Thats just mean.
Phoebe: No, we can go together! Just dont wait too long though, okay? Cause Im outta here sometime before Friday.
Chandler: Now Ive upset you? What did I say?
Rachel: Okay, two things didnt happen. Remember I told you that someone made out with Ralph Lauren in the copy room? Well, it turns out thats not true.
Director: (To Cameraman) Make sure you get this, theyre gonna want it for the bloopers show. (To everyone) Alright cut! Listen up everyone, when we start again its gonna be the countdown to new years, so I wanna see everybodys excitement.
Rachel: Im not going to sleep with Ralph Lauren. I mean, I could, but I wouldnt.
Hillary: Maybe Ill just turn the lights down a little.