words in movies
AMBER: I want you Drake.
DR. REMORE: I know you do but you and I can never be together that way.
DR. REMORE: There's something I never told you Amber. I'm actually your half- brother.
JOEY: Well, I get the medical award for separating the siamese twins. Then Amber and I go to Venezuela to meet our other half-brother, Ramone. And that's where I find the world's biggest emerald. It's really big but it's cursed.
CHANDLER: Ya know Phoebs, don't feel so bad for 'em. After they're done playing, I break out the little plastic women and everybody has a pretty good time.
PHOEBE: Hi, um, I just thought that it would be fun if the three of us had some beers and got to know each other.
PHOEBE: Oh good, ok. Oh nooo, I have to go because I'm late for my um, Green Eggs and Ham discussion group. Um tonight it's why he would not eat them on a train. Have fun bye.
PHOEBE: I know, yeah. Ok, talk to him. [leaves]
CHANDLER: What're you kidding? I broke up with her. She actually thought that Sean Penn was the capital of Cambodia.
EDDIE: Not Sean Penn. Alright, I, I've got a funny one, alright. My last girlfriend Tilly. Ok, we're eating breakfast, right, and I made all these pancakes, there was like 50 pancakes right. And all of the sudden she turns to me, alright, and she says, 'Eddie.' I say, 'yeah,' she says, 'Eddie, I don't want to see you anymore.' And it was literally like she had reached into my chest, ripped out my heart, and smeared it all over my life, ya know. And now there's like this incredible abyss, ya know, and I'm falling and I keep falling and I don't think I'm ever gonna stop. [finishes laughing] That uh, wasn't such a funny story, was it?
PHOEBE: And a crusty old man said I'll do what I can and the rest of the rats played moroccas. That's it, thanks, good night.
PHOEBE: I know.
RICHARD: Um, we should go too, I got patients at 8 in the moring.
MONICA: Ya know, I was thinking. Ya know how we always stay at your apartment? Well, I thought maybe tonight we'd stay at my place.
RICHARD: I don't know, I don't have my jammies.
PHOEBE: Oh, this is so nice. Alright I have to make a speech. I just wanna say that of all the guys that Monica has been with, and that is a lot, I like you the best.
CHANDLER: Oh, uh, he's not here right now, uh, I'm Chandler, can I take a message, or, or a fishtank?
TILLY: I gather by that oh that he told you about me.
CHANDLER: Yes. Hey, can I ask you, is Eddie a little...
TILLY: Eddie, I just came by to drop off your tank.
JOEY: Ooh, I look good.
JOEY: Uh, well, kinda yeah. Like, remember last week when Alex was in the accident? Well the line in the script was, 'If we don't get this woman to a hospital, she's going to die.' But I made it, ' If this woman doesn't get to a hospital, she's not gonna live.'
PHOEBE: Ohh, ok, I see what you did there. Aren't you afraid though, that the writers are gonna be kinda mad when they read this?
JOEY: I fall down an elevator shaft? What the hell does this mean, I fall down an elevator shaft?
DELIVERY GUY: Uhh, I don't know, I just bring the scripts.
DELIVERY GUY: I don't think that's gonna affect the plot of the show.
MONICA: Well it wasn't that many guys. I mean, if you consider how many guys there actually are, it's a very small percentage.
RACHEL: Hey, it's not that big a deal, I was just curious.
MONICA: Alright, before I tell you, uh, why don't you tell me how many women you've been with.
MONICA: Two? TWO? How is that possible? I mean, have you seen you?
RICHARD: Well, I mean what can I say? I, I was married to Barbara for 30 years. She was my high school sweetheart, now you, that's two.
RICHARD: Woah, woah, no wait a minute now. C'mon it's your turn. Oh c'mon. Ya know, I don't need the actual number, just a ballpark.
RACHEL: Wow, I am so glad I'm not Monica right now.
RACHEL: Oh honey, are you jealous of Paolo? Oh, c'mon, I'm so much happier with you than I ever was with him.
CHANDLER: Eddie, I didn't sleep with your ex-girlfriend.
EDDIE: Oh, this is, this is unbelievable. I mean, first you sleep with my ex-girlfriend then you insult my inteligenct by lying about it and then you kill my fish, my Buddy?
CHANDLER: Hey I didn't kill your fish. Look Eddie...[puts his hand on Eddie's shoulder] Would you look at what I'm doin' here. That can't be smart. So we're just gonna take this guy right off ya and put him here in Mr. Pocket. Tangellon? [picks up the fruit an tosses it to Eddie, it hits Eddie in the chest and falls]
RICHARD: Well, that's not bad at all. I mean, you had me thinkin it was like a fleet.
MONICA: And, well, don't you have a lot of wild oats to sew? Or is that what you're doing with me? Oh my God, am I an oat?
RICHARD: Honey, you are not an oat. I, I mean I don't know, I, I guess I'm just not an oat guy. I've only slept with women I've been in love with.
MONICA: Wow. Oh wow. You know I love you too, right.
RICHARD: Now I do. [they kiss and fall to the bed]
RACHEL: Ross, Ross, please listen to me. Ross, you are so much better for me than Paolo ever was. I mean you care about me, you're loving, you make me laugh.
ROSS: Oh, hey, if I make you laugh, here's an idea, why don't you invite Paulo over and have a little romp in the sack and I'll just stand in the corner and tell knock-knock jokes.
RACHEL: God, Ross, look, what you and I have is special, all Paolo and I ever had was...
ROSS: Animal sex, animal sex? So what're you saying, I mean, you're saying that like, there's nothing between us animal at all. I mean there's not even like, uhm, a little animal, not even, not even like, like chipmunk sex?
RACHEL: Ok, Ross, try to hear me. Ok, I, hey, I'm not gonna lie to you. Ok, it was good with Paolo.
RACHEL: But, what you and I have is so much better. Ok, we have tenderness, we have intimacy, we connect. Ya know, I swear, this is the best I have ever had.
MONICA: I know. I just can't find...
RICHARD: I have a little comb.
RACHEL: Ok, I, I will do your laundry for one month.
RACHEL: Ok, ok, ok, I will, I will, I, hey, I will clean the apartment for two months.
MONICA: Alright, I tell you what, I'll give this to you now if you can tell me where we keep the dustpan.
RICHARD: Uh, in the future, if I could see the schedule beforehand...
CHANDLER: So, when I woke up this morning, he'd stolen all the insoles out of my shoes.
CHANDLER: Because he thinks I slept with his ex-girlfriend and killed his fish.
DR. REMORE: Amber, I want you to know that I'll always be there for you, as a friend and as your brother.
DR. REMORE: Some guys are just lucky I guess.
DR. REMORE: Well then, uh, I uhh, guess that's me. Anyone else need to go on the elevator? Dr. Horton, Dr. Wong?
AMGER: I love you Drake.
JOEY: I don't feel like talkin.
JOEY: I don't know, I was kinda hopin' no one would ever find out.
PHOEBE: Yes, I was going to incorporate that. Oh good, here's Monica, she'll have something nice to say.
MONICA: Um, I straightened out your shower curtain so you won't get mildew. What? To me that's nice.
JOEY: No, I don't. It's like, ya know, you work your whole life for somethin' and you think that when you get it it's never gonna be as good as you thought it would be. But this so was. Ya know, it changed everything. Like the other day, I got this credit card application, and I was pre- approved. Huh? I've never been pre-approved for anything in my life.
RACHEL: Yeah, Joey honey, I don't know if this'll mean anything to you but you'll always be pre-approved with us.
EDDIE: I got a little surprise, look. There's a new fishie. I named him uh, Chandler, you know, after, after you.
Rachel: And so bad. I dont even know what youre talking about because I didnt ask you to do anything!
Joey: And he never played before either! Yknow what I think? I think beginners luck, very important in Cups.
Mike: Oh, you haven't picked yet. Oh good, 'cause I had an idea. I thought it would be fun if the third groomsman was my family dog. Chappy.
Chandler: Well, she's just so much fun with Joey, I just assumed, she'd still be living with him.
Monica: Yeah and-and Im sorry too. But, well I justI like things done a certain way and the chemistrys just not right.
Jill: Yknow, thanks for trying to cheer me up, but Im not gonna date some random guy from your work.
Joey: (Touches the back of his head and licks his fingers) Oh man! I thought I got it all!
Chandler: I'm not saying it was a good idea, I'm saying I snapped!
Joey: Well, I guess youre right. Maybe, maybe Ill take her down to the incinerator. Its gonna be so said, and kinda cool. (He goes to remove the back, but it doesnt come off. So he sits down in it, puts his feet up, stands up, and looks back at it.) Shes heeled!
Chandler: Yeah. (Checks his hair.) Oh no wait, Im not an nine-year-old girl.
Phoebe: (sighs) Honey, I wish you would get over her. I hate seeing you like this. Is there anything I can do for you? Do you want to look down my top?
Ross: Right! Right! I justI want you to know that Im going to be there through this whole thing, okay? Okay? The doctors appointments, the uh, the Lamaze classes, uh baby-proofing the apartmentAlthough we could probably worry about that til after we get married.
Hooker: Uh, no. But I could pretend to strip, but thats gonna cost extra. Okay, heres the extras, handcuffs, spanking (Chandler grunts for her not to continue and Joey pulls him back into the kitchen.)
Rachel: Ross! What are you I'm sorry sir. I just, I think he just really likes you.
Chandler: I don't know. Maybe we can open this up somehow.
Rachel: Oh sure Ross, yeah. If I have a heart attack in a restaurant, I want you there with your fossil brush.
Chandler: Yeah, yeah, yeah! I want you... I need you... I must have you Janice Litman Goralnik Neihosenstein.
Phoebe: No, I know, this way when I go to the party later Mike will know I am over him cause I'm gonna smell like another guy. (to the shop assistant) Yeah.
Ross: What are you talking about? You get sixty responses just for coming out of the closet! I didn't get one response! And I'm dead!
Monica: All right, Im gonna go steam my wedding dress okay? Who wants the responsibility of making sure nothing happens to it?
RICHARD: Monica... [He re-enters the bedroom and Monica jumps on the bed, trying to cover it.] Hey Mon, I have a question. Is Leroy the baddest man in the whole damn town or the fattest man in the whole damn town?
Ross: I bet someone could use one of Monica's freshly baked cookies.
Monica: Well he is! Yeah, I mean marriage is all he talks about! My goodness, in fact, Im the one thats making him wait!
Joey: Yeah! Yeah, Ive been trying to find ya to tell to stop messing with her and maybe I would have if these (lifts a leg) damn boat shoes wouldnt keep flying off!
Rachel: Okay, all right, give me the mug! Ill keep the mug.
Joey: Hey! I did it. I called my producer. I told him I had a family emergency, he totally bought it. Thanks for teaching me how to lie Pheebs.
Mike: I'm not blowing her off, I actually just got off the phone with her, were going out tomorrow night, I mean I hope that's ok with you stranger from the coffee house.
Monica: No, but I will leave a sweater that smells like me right next to you!
Chandler: (To Phoebe) Y'know what? I have been trying to apologize to him all week! If he's not gonna let me do it on the phone, I'm gonna go down there and do it in person.
Chandler: So I was right. This is what it feels like to be right. (Pause) Its oddly unsettling.
Gene: Uhm, "I have fur", "I like to bark".
Monica: Oh my god, where's my purse? No, you know what? I can replace everything in there. Get that binder, and let's go!
Rachel: Oh Phoebe, listen. Well, I think we gotta go. This place is really freaking me out. I've been watching this guy over there, I don't think he came with a kid!
Monica: Yes, I want to change. And why-why dont you go down and get us a table?
Ross: (returning from the phone.) So, I just picked up a message from Emily, she and Susan are going to a poetry reading together!
Chandler: Couldnt sleep last night you know, then I started worrying about this big divisional meeting that I have later today, the more I worried about it the more I couldnt sleep. Yknow? I was like, if I fall asleep now Ill get six hours sleep, but if I fall asleep now Ill get five hours sleep. Not matter what I did I couldnt fall asleep.
Ross: No, but I wanna be. Hey, I will be. Besides, I'm with Charlie, right? Oh my god, I'm still with Charlie, aren't I? I mean, she didn't see the dance, did she?
Joey: I'm sorry! But hey, it's over now, right? Because you can tell them that you know they know and I can go back to knowing absolutely nothing!
Rachel: Oh please, I hate packing, its closer to work, and we do have fun. Although, Im really gonna miss living with you.
Joey: I guess you wouldnt believe me if I said I was Kurt Douglas, huh?
Sebastian: Actually, I uh, I gotta get going. (To Rachel) Give me a call sometime.
Amy: I'm fine! And, I got you a present for letting me stay with you. Ready?
MRS. GELLER: Well, I was thinking, why doesn't he give Monica a call?
Chandler: Well, I was kinda hoping we could do this without him. (She starts to take off her latex gloves.) Oh no-no-no, leave the gloves on.
Chandler: Im sorry. Im-Im-Im sorry that I said I was going to when Im not. Look, this has nothing to do with you, y'know? And this isnt Rachels fault. Its me. I have serious, serious problems when it comes to women. I have issues with commitment, intimacy, (pause) mascara goop. And Im really sorry, its just that this is not, this isnt going to work out.
Ross: Thanks. Yeah, Carol borrowed it for a class, and I have to get it back to the museum.
Mike: I can't believe this is gonna end. I guess I'll have my stuff packed up.
Monica: Alright you two, I'm gonna go to the bathroom. Now I don't want anything going on while I'm gone. Here's a few things you can discuss: mucus, fungus and the idea of me and Ross doing it.
Chandler: I just want you to know that what you witnessed in there, that wasnt for fun.
Chandler: (following him) I'm telling you, I watched the tape. (Reaches Joey's room and Joey slams the door in his face)
Joey: I hate Pottery Barn too. They kicked me out of there just because I sat on a bed!
Monica: So why-why wasnt Rosss stuff ruined? (Pause) And if you say the words medical marvel Im going to Easy Bake your head!
Susan: I got an extra one. You want this? (holds the candy in front of Ross' face)
Mr. Geller: Well, it's your mother's bridge night so I thought that I would come into the city for a little Monicuddle. (hugs her) Since when did you start smoking cigars?
Phoebe: Oh my God! May I just say that you two gentlemen have the exact same hands! They're identical! Now, I've never seen anything like that in the business world.
Chandler: All right, wait! Come on! Just wait one second! There has to be something that I can do! Something! If we still had that entertainment unit I would get in it for six hours and think about how I let you down. (Joey looks intrigued) What?
Tag: I just wanted to come by and thank you for not laughing in my face yesterday. And I noticed there arent any plants in your office so I wanted to bring you your first (Notices her plant) There is a plant in your office.
Ross: (singing) Hey, hey, you're my baby, and I can't wait to meet you. When you come out I'll buy you a bagel, and then we'll go to the zoo.
Ross: (grabbing the necklace) The necklace I got you was gold, this one is silver.
Monica: You have to help me! Im supposed to be writing my vows and all I have is this! (Shows them what shes been working on.)
Joey: Yeah, yeah. I've got tons of stuff I could do. I'm gonna hit the beach, go swimming...
Rachel: Phoebe and I saw Chandler with a blonde woman today outside on the street and then we followed them to a house in Westchester.
Phoebe: No reason, its just I know a single guy that cares about other people.
Mona: Hey, I went by the photo shop, take a look, here is a mockup of our card. What do you think?
Joey: (grabbing the candy bar) Yeah Ill take that.
Emily: Right, Ive got to be off, Ill see ya. Buh-bye then. (She leaves.)
Phoebe: Y'know it's funny, you'd think I'd be angry. I mean, you'd think I'd wanna rip his tiny little head off. Fortunately, I'm past it.
Chandler: (starts crying) I-I cant believe Jills gone. (They all look at him.) I cant help it, I opened a gate.
Ross: Hey. Hey, check out the flyers for the band. I made 'em on a Macintosh in the computer room!
Rachel: (standing up) Okay. Yknow what? Id have to say I really dont care for your tone. And this is not the only hospital in this city and we have no problem toWhoa! (She starts a contraction) Oh gosh! Whoa!
Monica: Okay, while were waiting for these pills to kick in, Im gonna sit you down on the couch. Come on. (Phoebe gets up and goes with her.) Get some nice soft pillows under your head, Im gonna turn the TV on and you can watch whatever you want. And ImSit down(She sits down on the couch)gonna make you some tea. And then, Im gonna rub your feet.
Phoebe: Can I get you something to drink? Like a water and Valium?
Mrs. Geller: (rubbing her temples) Thats alot of information to get in in thirty seconds! Alright Joey, if wanna leave, just leave. Rachel, no you werent supposed to put beef in the trifle. It did not taste good. Phoebe, Im sorry, but I think Jacques Cousteau is dead. (Phoebe makes a sad face.) Monica, why you felt you had to hide the fact that you were in an important relationship is beyond me.
SUSIE: Alright. Now I would like to see you wearing nothing but them. Take your clothes off.
Frank: Oh, wait, no your right, no it was perfect and I cant believe that I screwed it up so bad.
Ross: (happily) My best friend and my sister! I cannot believe this. (He hugs them both.) (To Joey and Rachel) You guys probably wanna get some hugs in too, huh? Big news!
JADE: Well there really wasn't much time to get used to it, you know what I mean?
Monica: Well, she corned me! She asked if the wedding was in town! I mean, what was I supposed to do?!
Amanda: Hello Monica. It’s Amanda calling again. I am in the neighborhood hoping I can pop by your flat!
Chandler: No, I saw a picture of you covered in blueberries.
Phoebe: (Takes mike) Thanks, hi. Um, I wanna start with a song that means a lot to me this time of year. (Shakes bell as an introduction) (Sung:)
Rachel: Well, Im gonna take a nap, turkey makes me sleepy.
Monica: Why? Because everything is my responsibility? Isn't it enough that I'm making Thanksgiving dinner for everyone? You know, everyone wants a different kind of potatoes, so I'm making different kinds of potatoes. Does anybody care what kind of potatoes I want? Nooooo, no, no! (starting to cry) Just as long as Phoebe gets her peas and onions, and Mario gets his tots, and it's my first Thanksgiving, and it's all burned, and, and I... I...
Phoebe: My God, I cant get a minute of peace around this place.
CHANDLER: I still can't believe they promoted her to lieutenant.
Joey: I know, there are gonna be some pasty folks by the pool tomorrow! (A woman goes towards them)
Joey: Oh, I do. (Gives her the Joey-love look.) How you doin?
Monica: Oh, well. Now that I'm here I might as well help you with the cleaning and organizing! Just happen to have my label maker!
Rachel: Oh my God. I cannot keep having this same fight over and over again, Ross, no, youre, youre, youre making this too hard.
Monica: Whoa-whoa-whoa, Phoebe you gotta take her! Y’know, I-I-I said some really bad stuff about her, but y’know Rachel has some good qualities that make her a good roommate. She gets tons of catalogs and umm, she’ll fold down the pages of the things she thinks that I’d like.
EDDIE: Uh yes, I think I vaguely recall it.
MNCA: Well, we just happen to go to alot of places where you might drink. I mean, how do you go to a wine tasting without having a drink? Or... or to a club, or to the... zoo.
Joey: Oh my God! (they all hug) Oh! Hey, can I have an aquarium? And a sex swing?
Rachel: Yeah, we could. Oh hey look! Theres some Kappa Kappa Deltas! I was a Kappa. (to them) Hey sisters! (They ignore her.) (To Monica) Wow, we really are bitches.
Rachel: Phoebe, just the idea of pitting one baby against another, I mean, you know, and judging who's cuter just for a trophy...
Chandler: That's a good idea. I wonder where I could (Pause) get a basket of porn
Monica: (embraces Emma tightly) Ooh, I want one...
Chandler: Yknow we already went over this and I won!
Phoebe: least you've been married, OH MY GOD! I wanna trade lives with Ross (cries more)
Monica: Hey Tim? I need a calamari and a Caesar salad. And umm, could you get me the pesto?