words in movies
Phoebe: (angrily) Thats like the tenth time Ive peed since Ive been here!
Phoebe: Yeah, oh Im sorry, it must be really hard to hear! I tell ya, its a lot easier having three babies play Bringing in the Noise, Bringing in da Funk on your bladder! Im so sick of being pregnant! The only happiness I get is from a cup of coffee, which of course is decaf, causeOh! Im pregnant!
Phoebe: I havent really had any yet.
Ross: I sortve already asked Chandler.
Ross: Joey, I figured youd understand. I mean, I-Ive known him a lot longer.
Joey: Come on Ross! Look, I-I dont have any brothers; Ill never get to be a best man!
Chandler: You can be the best man when I get married.
Joey: (pause) Ill never get to be a best man!
Ross: (to Chandler) Wait-wait, so, you get to be my best man twice and I never get to be yours at all?
Joey: (impatiently tapping Chandler on the shoulder) What about me?! You-you just said I could!
Chandler: Im not even getting married! Okay, this is a question for science fiction writers!
Joey: I cant believe youre not picking me.
Chandler: Im not even Im not even
Ross: Fine, yknow what, thats it. From now on, Joey, I want you to be my best man.
Monica: I thought that was a good thing.
Joey: Do you guys have like a big bowl I can borrow?
Joey: Baby shower. Wow! That sounds sooo like something I dont want to do! Later! (Finally, he makes his exit.)
Phoebe: I cant believe Im gonna have a party! This is so great! (Really excited) A party! (Really, really excited) Yay!! (Suddenly, she starts crying and Rachel moves to comfort her.) I dont know why.
Joey: This is what Ive got going for the party so far, liquor wise. Get a lot of liquor.
Joey: Okay, now uh, in terms of the invite list, Ive got you, me, and Chandler and Im gonna invite Gunther cause, well, weve been talking about this pretty loud.
Gunther: Ill be there.
Joey: All rightoh! Listen, I know this is your party, but Id really like to the number of museum geeks that are gonna be there.
Ross: Yeah, see, I dont think its gonna that difficult considering this one wont be taking place in the basement of a Pizza Hut.
Chandler: Oh, Im Ross. Im Ross. Im too good for the Hut; Im too good for the Hut.
Ross: Look, I gotta go pick up Ben. Everything so far sounds great Joey, just remember to keep it on the mellow side, okay? Just a couple of guys hanging out playing poker, no-no strippers or anything okay?
Joey: Oh, I chose not to hear that.
Monica: Look what I got! Look what I got! Look what I got! (She shows Rachel what she bought. She bought a little leather jacket and a little cowboy outfit for the babies.) Can you believe they make these for little people?
Monica: I know! Phoebe is gonna love dressing them in these!
Phoebe: What the hell is this?! What, did you actually thought it would make me feel better to give me stuff that I cant use for another two months?! This sucks! All right, whats my next present?!
All: I dont have anything. (All of the rest of the women there hide their gifts behind their backs.)
Chandler: (banging a spoon against his beer bottle) Okay, a little announcement, a little announcement. Ive decided that my best man is, my best friend Gunther!
Chandler: (banging on the bottle again) Okay, okay, a little announcement, I just want everyone to know that the position of my best man is still open! And uh, (to the stripper) so is the position of the bride.
Ross: Smooth man. Yeah, you got some chilie on your neck. (Chandler checks and runs into the bathroom.) Well, I just want to say, thanks everyone, this-this was great. And hey! See you guys Monday morning. (They museum geeks wave at him.) Thanks Joey.
The Stripper: Wow, I didnt know they let you keep chickens and ducks as pets.
Joey: Oh yeah-yeah. And I got the duck totally trained. Watch this. Stare at the wall. (The duck complies.) Hardly move. (The duck complies.) Be white. (The duck complies.)
The Stripper: You are really good at that. So uh, I had fun tonight, you throw one hell of a party.
The Stripper: Yeah, that would be great. So I guess umm, good night.
Joey: Yeah. Ill let you play with my duck.
Joey: Dude, this isnt funny! What am I gonna do?! I go to bed last night, everythings cool! I wake up this morning, the strippers gone and the ring is gone!
Phoebe: I-I wanted to apologise if Iyknow seemed a tad edgy yesterday at my shower. Yknow its just the hormones, yknow.
Phoebe: Anyway, I just wanted to say thank you, it was just, it was so sweet. (She goes to hug them and they both flinch, thinking that Phoebe is about to attack them.)
Phoebe: Wow! This reminds me of the time when I was umm, living on the street and this guy offered to buy me food if I slept with him.
Rachel: (starting to cry) Im-Im sorry, I just thought that
Joey: Ugh! I dont know what Im going to do! I called the company that sent and th-they dont care! Then I called 9-1-1 and they laughed at me, if this isnt an emergency, then what is?
Ross: I just wanted to thank you again for last night, what a great party! And the guys from work had a blast. Yknow, one of them had never been to a bachelor party before. Yeah! And-and another one had never been to a party before, so
Joey: I was uh, I was thinking I might want to pick one of those babies up for myself, I might want to get one of those
Chandler: Well, I think it all started when you said, "Hey Joey, why dont you be my best man."
Joey: Dude, I screwed up, you dont have to turn me in!
Joey: Oh, yeah, well I already did that! They said theyre gonna look into it right after they solved all the murders.
Joey: I did that too! They wouldnt give me her real name or her number. They said, "If I bothered them again theyd call the police." I said, "If you talk to the police, you tell them Im missing a ring!"
Joey: Look Ross, I am so-so sorry. I-I-I
Monica: Im so glad you liked it.
Phoebe: Oh! No, I-I think I just had a contraction.
Phoebe: Yeah, I thought I had one a couple of minutes ago, and now I know that was definitely one.
Monica: Wait, you cant have the baby here! I mean I havent sterilised it since the guys moved out!
Rachel: Okay. Its okay. Were gonna be okay. Yknow what? Its okay. Im gonna, Im gonna, Im gonna boil some water and just rip up some sheets!
Rachel: I dont know!
Joey: All right, okay, this is great, uh, Chandler, you get behind the desk. And-and when she comes in hopefully, she wont recognise you because, well, why would she? Uh, okay, and then you buzz Ross and I. (to Ross) You be Mr. Gonzalez, and Ill be uh, Mr. Wong.
The Stripper: Wait, you guys think I stole some ring?
The Stripper: Okay, who are you? The Hardy boys? Look, I dont need to steal some stupid ring, all right? I make $1,600 a week doing what I do; any of you guys make that?
Joey: I dont get it! It was in my room all night! And if she didnt take it, and I didnt take it; and you (Chandler) didnt take it, then who did? (The duck quacks.) Shh! Were trying to think! (Ross and Chandler realise it at the same moment and stare at Joey, who doesnt get it. After a short pause, with the duck still quacking, Joey figures it out and starts pointing at the duck.)
Rachel: I still dont get how you know when its false labour.
Phoebe: Okay, I guess. I mean I dont know, its just, I guess I know its going to be over soon.
Phoebe: I know. Its just yknow usually when youre, when youre done with the pregnant thing, yknow, then you get to do the mom thing. Im gonna be yknow, sitting around in my leather pants, drinking Tequila.
Phoebe: Okay thats even sadder. Look, I know, I know what I got myself into, its just that now that theyre in me its like, its like I know them yknow, I mean-I mean, its just not gonna be easy when these little babies have to go away.
Monica: I mean, youre the one theyre gonna come to when they wanna run away from home, and the one they talk to about sex.
Phoebe: Cool Aunt Phoebe. I am pretty cool!
Joey: Im so worried about him, yknow?
Joey: No, its not. I mean you-you made me your best man and I totally let you down!
Ross: Hey! Hey! Hey! I get to choose my best man, and I want both you guys.
Ross: Hey, both you guys should be up there with me. I mean, you two are-are my I mean, Im lucky to have just one good (They all start getting emotional.)
Joey: (starting to cry) I gotta go check something over here. (He walks away so that they cant see him cry.)
Young Ethan: Well, if that's what you kids are calling it these days then, yes I am. I uh, I've kinda been waiting for the right person.
Chandler: Okay, I promise, Ill end it.
Rachel: Well, last time I almost got fired. You must end it, you must end it now!
Monica: Yeah, I thought it was cute.
Phoebe: Okay, I didnt hear that.
Chandler: I KNEW IT!!!!
JOEY: It's just that, I, I'm gonna miss Joseph. I liked him. His wife, she was hot. [Chadler pushes him out the door by the face.]
Ross: Im telling you its totally unconstituional.
Joey: I couldnt help it, there love is so pure.
Rachel: Monica! I couldnt find him for two hours! He was having sex with Amy Welch!
Frank: Yeah, you can melt art. Hey, can I use your phone?
Monica, Chandler, Phoebe, and Rachel: Oh yeah, I totally agree.
Monica: I dont want things to change! Do you?
Phoebe: Oh, no, I meant that its weird that you only have nine now.
Rachel: Okay. Honey, I would love for you to go with me. (Ross has a worried look on his face) What?
Phoebe: Im kind, caring, and sweet. Whats Monica like?
MONICA: Exactly. Oh, I love that I can be totally neurotic around you now. Tell me the truth. Don't you like it better now that everything on your desk is perpendicular?
Mrs. Geller: (laughs) Im not freaking out.
Phoebe: I dont get it.
Mr. Geller: All-right fine, but I just want to say, Im not paying for your wine cellar. You thieving, would be speaking German if it werent for us, cheap little man. (Emilys stepmum looks shocked. Jack and Judy get up and leave.)
Chandler: All right, theres a nuclear holocaust, Im the last man on Earth. Would you go out with me?
Joanna: Wait. I wanna show you something.
Mike: I've missed you so much! No, I'm not gonna ask you to get back together because I know we want different things, but just to be with you one more night.
Monica: (Looks at her nails) Oh my God. Wait a minute, I had them put (realises) Oh my God! Its in the quiche! Oh My God!
Joey: Oh yes I do. Otherwise whats next? Today Im just a guy who cant finish a turkey, but tomorrow Im the guy who eats half a Powerbar, wraps up the rest, and puts in the fridge? No! No, I just I justI gotta change my pants. (Gets up and heads for the door.) Jeans have no give. (Exits.)
Phoebe: God, I hope they kick his ass!
Joey: Why did I have to say Mike? I don't know a Mike! Why couldn't I have said... (Looks through his address book) There's no guy in there!
Joanna: I cant!!
Joanna: Im in my bosss car!
Rachel: Well, then I lost it. You buy me one!
JOEY: No I just uh, thought you liked your eggs with the bread with the hole in the middle, a-la me.
Chandler: No. No, I just think that maybe I-I'd heard it somewhere before. (Sits down rubbing his temple.)
Monica: I dont know. I guess the other people just dont care enough.
MONICA: Hey, you know I got a question for ya. Just a little thing, no pressure.
Joey: Im out.
Joey: No way! Kay look, if I have to go to the doctor for anything its gonna be for this thing sticking out of my stomach! (Rolls over and shows Chandler.) Why did I have to start working out again? (Looks at the weights he was using.) Damn you 15s!
Monica: Ohh, Im such an idiot. I cant believe I actually thought she could change.
Kim: Oh my God. He just gave you the coldest look I have ever seen. Its like he hates you. Then it is true.
Monica: Oh good, Im glad thats catching on.
Rachel: Terry, I, I, I know that I haven't worked here very long, but I was wondering, do you think it would be possible if I got a $100 advance in my salary?
Chandler: Well, listen I ah, still have one more person to ah meet, but unless it turns out to be your sister, I think youre chances are pretty good. (Eric offers to shake hands) All right. (Chandler hugs him.)
Chandler: I don't get it, I mean, you just got him. How can he be an adult already?
ROSS: [his beeper goes off] It's the museum again, can I, oh.
Phoebe: Aw. (Phoebe gets a bad taste in her mouth when he looks away) Im justIm in a place in my life right now where I I
Rachel: Oh, great. Although I did sit down where there wasnt a chair.
Chandler: Oh, umm, Joey was born, and then 28 years later, I was robbed!!
JOEY: Really, hey, you mind if I turn the heat down?
Phoebe: Y'know what, I can stay, Im gonna stay. Cause the last time I went skiing I was to afraid to jump off the chair lift, I just went around and around.
Joshua: Anyway, hopefully, Ill see you around sometime. (He goes out the door.)
Phoebe: Excuse me, I dont want Greg and Jennys rejects.
Rachel: Doh!! (pause) Ive got it!
Joey: Sometimes I get in here just to get away from it! Hey, a nickel!!
Chandler: Oh no-no-no, Im, Im paddling away!
Mrs. Geller: Yes, well I was wrong, and I have to say you really impressed me today.
Mischa: (to Monica) I have just resigned my post. Would you care to accompany me to the Rainbow Room? I have diplomatic coupons.
Mrs. Geller: I thought it was quite tasty.
Joeys Sister: Finally, I thought wed never be alone. Can I just tell you something, I have not stopped thinking about you since the party. (kisses him)
Rachel: But Joey, I dont think Ross wants me to move into his apartment and disrupt his life like that. I mean(Ross turns to her with wishful eyes.)Or he does.
Joey: Im sorry Dutch, I didnt get that last little bit.
Chandler: I think so.
Chandler: (to Rachel) I love you. (Kisses her on the forehead)
ROSS: Yeah, I know, it's my birthday. We all should be here.
Rachel: You guys! It was bananas, cream, and beef! I-I just cannot believe that you ate that so that I wouldnt feel bad!
MONICA: They want me to do it, which is really cool, seeing as I've never catered before, and I really need the money, and this isn't a problem for you, is it?
Ross: Im sorry, I dont believe contestants are allowed to talk to each other.
Joanna: No, we are. Im sad.
Rachel: Well, I thought you liked doing it. (Rachel starts out the door and stops.)
Pete: Well if youre asking me to quit, then youre asking me to be someone Im not. Ive got to do this.
Monica: No fair. I don't even have one. How come they get two?
Phoebe: I can't, I have to take my grandmother to the vet.
Rachel: I didnt I never said that.
Joey: No, I gotta wear this thing for a couple weeks. (points to the sling he is wearing)
Rachel: (starting to cry) Okay, Im sorry. (Runs out still carrying the pizza box.)
Rachel: Well Thats yknowThatsWeve been alone for the last twenty minutes were doing okay. Besides yknow what? I-IMaybe we wont be alone, cause lately I-Ithings have been happening between me and Ross, yknow? Right before I went into labor, we-we had this kiss. Yknow? So it might be the the beginning of something.
PHOEBE: OK, I can be a waitress, I can be a waitress.
CHANDLER: Hey, stick a fork in me, I am done.
Ross: Its still a gift! I got it from the gift shop!
Joey: I have actually not heard of that.
Chandler: You're right, I'm sorry. (Burst into song and dances out of the door.) "Once I was a wooden boy, a little wooden boy..."
Phoebe: No, I can handle it. No, Im a professional. (She starts to leave)
Joey: Um-hmm! Look, I-I-I don't know how much more of this I can take! Did you know he taped over my Baywatch tape with some show about bugs! My God! What if that had been porn?
Monica: I told you not to go down there!
Chandler: Guys, guys, guess who I am?! (starts dancing around in an effort to stop the fighting.)
Chandler: (on phone) Yes, Fran. I know what time it is, but I'm looking at the WENUS and I'm not happy!... (Listens) Oh, really, really, really? Well, let me tell you something... you will care about it, because I care about it! You got it? Good! (slams phone down, then leans back and realizes what just happened) Whooooaaaa....
Chandler: I wanna quit the gym.
Rachel: (shouting) Im sorry!
MONICA: No, I don't even know how serious he is about me. Until I do, I'm not telling them anything.
Woman: Hi, Im Maria.
ERICA: You told me I was the only one. [throws a glass of water in his face]
Monica: I dont have an atlas.
Chandler: Im a little bit uncomfortable with the that way you express yourself.
Tommy: Ooh, sorry little Mr. Chic-A-Dee, sorry you went doody in my hand! (starts to walk out and stops) (to Rachel) Well, I guess were not going out anymore. Whaa!!!
Mr. Treeger:: Huh, I wouldve thought it was the other way around.
Rachel: Ooh, I was kinda hoping that wouldn't be an issue... [Scene: Monica's Apartment, everyone is there and watching a Spanish Soap on TV and are trying to figure out what is going on.]
Steve (sobbing): I - I can't believe I�m crying in front of you. You must think I'm so pathetic.
Monica: Look, I don't even know how I feel about him yet. Just give me a chance to figure that out.
Rachel: Oh my God. I cannot keep having this same fight over and over again, Ross, no, youre, youre, youre making this too hard.
Phoebe: Im telling you hes dead. What we are about to have here is a dead fat guy on a stick.
Rachel: Oh, umm, I was just yknow working out and umm Oh, thats it.
Pete: Could you leave a note? Cause Im on a lot of pain killers now, and I dont know if Ill remember this tomorrow. (She leaves.)