words in movies
RACHEL: Mom, would you relax. That was 10 blocks from here and, the, the woman was walking alone at night, I would never do that. Mom, c'mon, stop worrying. This is a safe street, this is a safe building, there's nothing [a pigeon flies in the window and lands on the table] OH MY GOOOD, oh my God, oh I gotta go, I gotta go, I gotta go. [hangs up] OK, that's fine, you just read the paper, I'm gonna get a pot, it's not for you. [grabs a pot and lid] OK, that's fine, read the Family Circus, enjoy the gentle comedy. [puts pot over the pigeon] Aaahh, oh my God, oh my God, oh my God, oh my God, oh my God, oh my God, oh my God, oh my God, aaaaahh. [knock at the door] It's open you guys.
RACHEL: Hi, hi can I help you?
RACHEL: Uh, no she doesn't but I can, I can get a message to her.
PHOEBE: Well, I mean, I'm not married married, ya know, he's just a friend and he's gay and he's just from Canada and he just needed a green card.
MONICA: I can't believe you married Duncan. I mean how could you not tell me? We lived together, we told each other everything.
PHOEBE: I'm sorry Monica but I knew if I told you, you'd get really, like, judgemental and you would not approve.
MONICA: Of course I wouldn't approve, I mean, you were totally in love with this guy who, hello, was gay. I mean, what the hell were you thinking?
PHOEBE: OK, I wasn't in love with him and I was just helping out a friend.
MONICA: Please, when he left town you stayed in your pajamas for a month and I saw you eat a cheeseburger.
PHOEBE: I might have.
MONICA: I can't believe you didn't tell me.
MONICA: What have I not told you?
PHOEBE: Oh, I don't know. Umm, how about the fact that the underwear out there on the telephone pole is yours from when you were having sex with Fun Bobby out on the terrace.
CHANDLER: I didn't know it was a big secret.
MONICA: Oh it's not big, not at all, you know, kinda the same lines as, say, oh I don't know, having a third nipple.
JOEY: I can't believe you. You told me it was a nubbin.
JOEY: I don't know, you see somethin', you hear a word, I thought that's what it was. Let me see it again.
JOEY: Ahh, alright, alright, alright, I was young and I just wanted a job, OK. But at the last minute I couldn't go through with it so they let me be the guy who comes in to fix the copier but can't 'cause there's people havin' sex on it.
MONICA: Look honey, I wanted you to hook up with Ross as much as you did. But he's with her now and you're just gonna have to get over it.
RACHEL: Ohh, I'm gonna have to get over it. God, see I didn't know that's I had to do, I just have to get over it.
MONICA: I can't believe you're dressing up for him. I mean, you're just, you're setting yourself up all over again.
PHOEBE: OK, no. For your information I'm going to see him so I can put all those feeling behind me. OK, and the reason I'm dressed like this is because I think it's nice to look nice for your gay husband.
CHANDLER: Oh I see, I see, because of the third nipple thing. Ha ha ha ha. . .
ROSS: Can I ask you somethin'?
ROSS: No, no, she's great and it's not like we haven't done anything. I mean, uh, uh, we, we do plenty of other stuff, lot's of other stuff, like uhh. . .
ROSS: It's just, it's, it's me. You, you know I've only been with one woman my whole life and she turned out to be a lesbian. So now I've got myself all psyched out, you know, and it's become, like this, this thing and I. . . Well, you just must think I'm weird.
RACHEL: No, no, no, no I don't think it's weird, I think, I think umm, in fact, in fact you know what I think?
RACHEL: I think it's sexy.
RACHEL: Yes, absolutely. I would wait and wait. . . then I'd wait some more.
RACHEL: Oh yeah, I don't care how much she tells you she wants it, I don't care if begs, she pleads, she tells you she, she's gonna have sex with, with another man. That just means it's working.
PHOEBE: Do I? Thank you, so do you.
PHOEBE: Sparkly. So, wow, this is pretty wonerful, huh. Mr. major capades guy. I, I remember when you were just, like, King Friday in Mr. Roger's Ice is Nice.
DUNCAN: I missed you. [they hug] I'm gonna get changed.
ROSS: [pulls Rachel aside] I just, I wanted to thank you for our uh, our little talk before.
ROSS: Well, I was going to, but after I talked to you, I talked to Joey.
ROSS: Basically he told me to get over myself and just do it, ya know. So I though about what you said and I though about what he said and, well, his way I get to have sex tonight so. . .
JOEY: I'm fine with it, I mean, if you're OK watching a video filled with two nippled people. [Chandler puts the tape in]
RACHEL: Great, people having sex, that's just what I need to see.
MONICA: Hell, I wanna see Joey.
MONICA: All I say is, she better get the job.
JOEY: Shh, OK, here I come, here I come. See I'm comin' to fix the copier, I can't get to the copier, I'm thinkin' what do I do, what do I do. . . so I just watch 'em have sex. And then I say, wait, here's my line, [Joey from TV] you know that's bad fo r the paper tray.
JOEY: Thank you. Wait wait wait wait, you see me again. Hang on, the guy's butt's blockin' me. There I am, there I am, there I am, there I am, there I am. . .
DUNCAN: Oh, yeah, um, alright, I kinda need a divorce.
DUNCAN: Oh God, I don't know how to tell you this. I'm straight.
DUNCAN: Yeah, I know, I.
PHOEBE: I, I don't, I don't understand, how can you be straight? I mean, you're, you're so smart and funny and you throw such great Academy Award parties.
DUNCAN: I know, that's what I kept telling myself but you just reach a point where you can't live a lie anymore.
DUNCAN: Well I guess on some level I always knew I was straight. I though I was supposed to be something else, you know, I'm an ice dancer, all my friends are gay, I was just tryin' to fit in.
DUNCAN: Well, I've never told you this but, there were one or two times, back in college, when I'd get really drunk, go to a straight bar and wake up with a woman next to me. But I, I, I told myself it was the liquor and e-everyone experiments in college.
DUNCAN: But now I know I don't have a choice about this, I was born this way.
PHOEBE: I, I don't know what to say. I mean, you know, you're married to someone for six years and you think you know him and then one day says, 'Oh, I'm not gay.'
RACHEL: No, no, I mean, no, c'mon you guys, I mean, c'mon look it's only eleven thirty. Let's just talk, we never just hang out and talk anymore.
RACHEL: Well, you have been in our lives for nearly two months now and we don't really know you. I mean, who is Julie? I mean, what do you like, what don't you like? We wanna hear everything.
RACHEL: So. I mean, who here does not have the time to get to know Julie?
CHANDLER: I got the time to get to know Julie.
JOEY: I got time.
MONICA: Rach, I know her pretty well, can I go? [Rachel gives her a look from hell] That's fine.
PHOEBE: [handing him the papers] Here you go. You know what, I just have one more question, um, if you had figured this out sooner and um, I had been around, do you think that I would have been the one who. . . no, um, I'm sorry, don't tell me, I don't th ink either answer would make me feel better.
DUNCAN: I love you Phoebe. [they hug and kiss]
ROSS: Oh, no no, I am.
ROSS: Um, no, I uh, I have done it before.
RACHEL: Uh, OK, I mean uh, what, how are you gonna handle it. I mean, are, are ya gonna, are ya gonna talk about it before hand, are you just gonna pounce?
ROSS: I uh, I don't know, I guess I'm just gonna see, see what happens.
RACHEL: Nothing, I mean, um, it is your first time with her and, you know if the first time doesn't go well, well then that's, that's pretty darn hard to recover from.
ROSS: No, no, I don't wanna put it off, I just, God I just, I spent last year being so unbelievably miserable, ya know, and now, now I'm actually happy. You know, I mean, really happy. I just, I just don't wanna, I don't wanna mess it up, ya know.
RACHEL: I know, yeah, sorry.
RACHEL: Maybe it, maybe it doesn't have to be this tough. I mean, maybe you were on the right track with this whole, you know, spontaneous thing. I mean, women really like that.
RACHEL: Yeah, I mean, you know it, I mean, if it were me I, I, you know, I'd want you to, I don't know, like catch me off guard, you know, with like a really good kiss, you know really, sort of um, soft at first, then maybe um brush the hair away from my face, and look far into my eyes in a way that let's me know that something amazing is about to happen.
RACHEL: And then, I don't know, I mean you'd pull me really close to you so that, so that I'd be pressed up, you know, right against you. And, um, it would get kind of sweaty and uh, and blurry, and then it's just happening.
Joey: (gasps) Im 30!
Charlie: Joey is a great guy, but we're just... so different! I mean, during your speech he kept laughing at homo erectus!
Phoebe: (shes strumming something) Yeah? (Joey nods yes.) Okay, I think Ill play it at the wedding.
Joey: Yeah! Well, I think well see if they actually let you play. Huh? I mean they tell you anything you want to hear like-like, "You look 19," and then they just take it away like-like, "No you dont."
Phoebe: Well, I dont think Monica is gonna take this away.
Monica: No-no, I-I really dont want to talk about it! I dont! (To Rachel) Especially with you. (Goes into her room.)
Ross: Hey, I just realized we kinda let some stuff up in the air
Rachel: I care!
Ross: Look, just because some idiot drew on your face doesn't mean you shouldn't have any fun! Okay? And besides, hey-hey-hey no one is even gonna look at you. Okay? This is Vegas! Hello! There are tons of other freaks here! (Rachel turns around and glares at him.) There are tons of freaks here. No other. No. Come on! No one will notice, I swear!
Rachel: What do you think Monica mean when she said she didnt want to talk, especially with me? I mean, why not especially you and me? We were both out there kissing.
Monica: I love you!
Rachel: Am I going to let you watch me undress?
Rachel: (yelling from the living room) Oh wait-wait-wait!! No! Dont go in there! Dont go in there! I need another soda!
Chandler: If marriage worked, Id be all for it. But do you know what the divorce rate in this country is? 97%.
Phoebe: Oh, I see. (Exits angrily.)
Chandler: See, Im not bad at this fixing up thing, huh?
Rachel: Oh we were, but that was just a (pause as the audience reacts), I mean that was just a big drunken mistake.
Phoebe: Yknow, I dont really their permission.
Rachel: I swear, I never wanted any part of your night!
Rachel: Monica, yknow what? The only reason I did that was because your party was so boring!
Mrs. Geller: I actually needed to talk to you before the birth.
Rachel: Ugh, Monica I dont want to steal your stupid thunder!
Monica: I just thought it would be nice if I could have just this one night!
Rachel: Y'know I cant believe I even thought about getting back together again! We are so over!!
Rachel: (ignoring them) Monica, why? Why would I ever want to take away from your night?
MRS GREEN: You didn't marry your Barry. I did.
Ross: Oh, I see, so everybody wins.
Phoebe: Oh, I know, we should have been more prepared. (she looks around) It's okay. Now, the way I see it, our real competition now is Cameron. Oh my God, they just took her sweater off. Look at those arms! Hello Michelin Man.
Chandler: (to Richards date) And uh, you dont have a mustache which is good. (She just smiles.) Im Chandler; I make jokes when Im uncomfortable.
Monica: I know why!
Rachel: Because! Because I was sad.
Rachel: All right Monica, do you want to know why I was with Ross tonight?!
Joey: Oh yeah, sure, no problem, Ill justhold on one second. (He turns around and puts his hand in his pants and groans in relief.) (In a relaxed voice.) "Hey Timmy, Ive got a surprise for you!"
Monica: (starting to cry) Im sorry I almost made you sleep with Ross. (They hug.)
Rachel: I mean Im probably 98% happy, maybe 2% jealous. And I mean whats 2%? Thats nothing.
Rachel: Anyway sweetie, I am, Im so sorry I ruined your night.
Ross: Oh, Ill have some!
"We thought Phoebe would leave, but she just stayed and stayed. Thats right, Im here all night, and Chandler will never get l "
Amanda: Oh! Bugger. Should I not have said that? I feel like a perfect arse!
Chandler: Oh, I got some thoughts on that.
Joey: You got it. Okay. Now, I can pass for 19 right?!
Phoebe: I need to talk to you, its pretty urgent. Its about Monica and Chandler.
Joey: Yeah, shes been out there for twenty minutes, Im surprised you didnt hear her on the way over.
Phoebe: Oh yeah it is! Im going to the movies and it starts in like five minutes.
Rachel: Oh, she wants to see me tomorrow...Oh, she sounded really weird, I gotta call Barry... (Does so, on phone) Hi, it's me, I just.. Mindy!! Mindy! Hi! No, I figured that's where you'd be!
Ross: Do you realize I have a classroom full of students?
CHANDLER: It's about cutting my people a little slack, ya know, for morale. Look, if you wanna see some rough numbers, I can get them to you by Wednesday.
Rachel: I think he's stealing from me.
Monica: Of course you can look at it! Yeah, I want your opinion too!
Rachel: No Paul, I dont know anything about you! Yknow, like-like your childhood! Tell me about your childhood!
Phoebe: That is so sweet. But don't you think it's a little too soon? I mean there's so much we don't know about each other.
Joey: All right, Im gonna go! (Gets up and heads for the door.)
Monica: Rachel! Im never gonna think its okay for you to cheat on your husband!
Phoebe: Im sorry, Im with a client right now.
Joey: Yeah I did!
Ross: Can I, can I help you with something?
Ross: (deadpan) Yes I am.
Monica: No. No. Not it. Not it. Not it. (Checks another rack and another woman tries to reach around her.) (To the woman) Dont crowd me! (Finds it) This is it! This is the dress! Oh my God, its perfect! (She takes it off of the rack and someone has a hold of it on the other side of the rack and tugs on it.) Im sorry, this ones taken! (The other woman tugs harder pulling Monica through the rack.) Whoa!
Ross: Okay, I have a problem I have to go into work for a few hours, some kids messed up the Homo Sapien display.
Phoebe: I thought Id try to take a walk. Would you pour me some water? Ill be back soon.
Chandler: Oh yeah, I should probably call them.
Chandler: Oh, I dont think I ever heard that story.
Mrs. Geller: You tell her Jack, I cant do it.
Monica: What about when I started dating Chandler?
Monica: You bet your ass, Im gonna fire you! Thank you.
Rachel: Okay. All right, that's true! But y'know I just don't embarrass that easily.
Jill: Okay, I bought a boat.
Chandler: Well, I have some.
Monica: How? I dont have any money.
Mrs. Geller: Oh, thank you Chandler! I just bought it.
Female Jeweler: I just sold it to that gentleman. (Points to the one walking out the store.)
Rachel: Ah thats great. No actually thats (In a sexy voice) Thats great! Thats really great! Yknow, I gotta tell ya writing, I mean writing, gets me uh, gets me kinda hot.
Rachel: Look, I know that you guys really want to get to Vermont and this isn't a really big deal to you, but it really is to us, ok? Emma will never have a first birthday again.
Rachel: Remember that big thing I was gonna tell you about?
Chandler: Yes, I am!
Joey: Well nothing yet, they really hate you and I want to fit in.
Chandler: No, I realize that honey, but Im not gonna spend all of the money on one party.
Rachel: Well no, I dont smell anything.
Joey: No-no-no, Im serious. You dont smell it? Somethings on fire.
Phoebe: You apologize to the tree right now or I am calling for backup. (The woman calls her bluff.) (Screaming at no one in particular) Backup! Backup!!
Monica: Maybe I do! Im pretty feisty! (She blows the signal.)
Rachel: Yknow, I can not believe you told him, Joey!
Rachel: Uh-huh, yeah I did, because I wore out my first copy when I was with you. (Exits.)
The Fan: Oh yeah! Ive seen all her movies.
Ross: He said he liked that!! Oh youre right, youre right. Im sorry.
Ross: (looking at the table) Excuse me ladies. (To Phoebe) Im sorry?
Chandler: Yeah, Im putting my foot down. Yeah look, when I proposed I told you that I would do anything to make you happy, and if having the perfect wedding makes you happy then, then thats what were gonna do.
Chandler: I love you so much.
Monica: I know this is going to sound unbelievably selfish, but, were you planning on bringing up the whole baby/lesbian thing? Because I think it might take some of the heat off me.
Paul: What?! I cant believe youre trying to stifle me! When just 14 hours ago we figured out that that is exactly what my mother was trying to do to me!
Ronni: Oh, uh, well, you left your good hair at my apartment, I figured you'd need it tomorrow for your meeting. (Hands him the hair)
Joey: Of course Im jokin! I dont take checks.
CAROL: And then Susan and I got in this big fight because I said maybe we should call off the wedding, and she said we weren't doing it for them, we were doing it for us, and if I couldn't see that, then maybe we should call off the wedding. I don't know what to do.
Monica: No, I want everything you just said. I want a marriage.
Joanna: Wait-wait-wait-wait! You can put your sad little muffin back in its drawer. If you must know the truth, I didnt want to lose a perfectly good assistant.
PHOEBE: I can be a waitress. OK watch this. Um, gimme two number ones, 86 the bacon, one Adam and Eve on a raft and rick'em, la-la-la-la-la, la-la-la-la-la.
Rachel: (starting to move closer to him) Thats right, I wanna do it with you! Ive been trying to fight it, but you just said all the right things.
Paul: Im thinking that you are looking really fine it that dress.
Joey: I dont want to, Im scared.
Chandler: No I didnt!