words in movies
Ross: I know!
Ross: I've seen her at work, but I always figured, ah-huh? But, uh, I made her dinner. We had a great time. And we're going out again tomorrow.
Chandler: Well, I have a call in about that.
Chandler: Oh, it wasn't a big deal. I just went to a couple of bookstores, talked to a couple of dealers... called a couple of the author's grandchildren.
Phoebe: Yeah, and what a great way to say, "I secretly love you, roommate's girlfriend!"
Monica: (Entering from her bedroom, talking on the phone) Yeah, once again, I am sorry. Thank you. Bye. (To the gang) I just had to turn down a job catering a funeral for sixty people.
Monica: Because I don't have the money or the equipment to handle something that big on such short notice. I mean there's no way.
Monica: I don't know.
Phoebe: There you go, that's the spirit! Okay! Now, if you need money, I will lend you money, but just get moving!
Kathy: Can I borrow the keys to your apartment?
Kathy: Ahahaha... haha.. yes I can, of course. Excuse me.
Joey: We've only been going out for a couple of weeks, do you think I gotta get her something?
Joey: Oh, I know...
Phoebe: Ooo, a crossword! Can I help?
Rachel: No! I'm sorry, honey, it's just that last week I got all but three answers and I really want to finish a whole one without any help.
Monica: Oh my God, it was the best funeral ever! I mean, everyone loved the food, and guess what? I even got another funeral for tomorrowthe dead-guy-from-today's best friend. I mean, it is like I am the official caterer for that accident!
Monica: Oh. Well, I didn't realize that you needed it back right away. I mean, you told me to go and be a caterer. So I went. I beed. I mean, I... I used it to buy all this stuff. But lookI've got another job tomorrow, so I'll pay you back with the money I make from that.
Phoebe: Oh. Okay. Oo, sorry I acted like a bank.
[They go into the apartment. Inside the apartment it looks like a sewage dump exploded and landed in her living room. There are clothes and food and junk covering every square inch of space. I mean pigs have nicer pens. Ross is completely shocked.]
Cheryl: My hamster. I hope she's okay, I haven't seen her in a while. Have a seat.
Ross: Well, I do! Why don't we go back to my place, light a couple of candles, break open a box of Cinnamon Fruit Toasties, uh...
Monica: No. I hate this part.
Chandler: I don't know... um, Grease?
Rachel: What? Oh, I'm sorry, I can't, I'm busy.
Joey: (whining and heading toward the door) Look, it's too late, and I got an audition. I can't shop anymore! I...
Chandler: All right. I will go out and I will try to find something for her, okay?
Phoebe: I know, it's tough. You know what the first thing I did after my mother's funeral was?
Phoebe: Pay the caterer! Look, I've had a lot of jobs, okay, and there are some people who just always try to get out of paying. It's either, you know, "that massage wasn't long enough, or, "I don't recognize any of those songs," or, you know, "these sombreros aren't big enough. Bad little white girl!"
Mrs. Burkart: (singing) ...emblem of the land I love. The home of....
Ross: What do you mean? Nothing happened! I had to get out of there.
Ross: No, I tried that. She says it has a weird smell.
Ross: I don't know. Soap?
Ross: I mean, uh, who... who cares about a little sloppiness?
Chandler: Okay, all right. I just spent the entire afternoon looking for a present for Kathy that would be better than the rabbit.
Chandler: Oh, yeah. Yeah, I found this great place called "Invisible things for Kathy." (Motions to an imaginary pile of presents next to him.) Can you give me a hand with all this stuff?
Chandler: She's really going to love this, you know? The bottom line is I want her to have it, even if I don't get to be the one who gives it to her.
Joey: Our place, the hall! I...
Chandler: I got something for her. (Joey picks up the package, shakes it next to his ear, can't hear anything, switches ears, shakes it again.) It's a book!
Joey: You got it. Thanks man. Thanks for doing this, I owe you one. (Joey leaves, comes back in.) Oh, hey! There wasn't any change from that twenty, was there?
Monica: Maybe I can try at intermission? Phoebe, come on... you know what? Let's just go!
Phoebe: No! Hey, we're not leaving until we get paid! I don't know who she thinks she is! Enough is enough! (Phoebe goes into the living room.) Hey, widow?
Ross: (mustering up courage) Yes. Yes I do. (They go inside.)
Ross: Oh my god! I'm so sorry, Cheryl. I must have freaked out.
Rachel: I did it! Oh! I finished it! I did it all by myself! And there's nobody to hug!
Rachel: Hey! Hey, you guys, I finished the crossword all by myself! Hug me!
Monica: Wait a minute, Phoebe! We should be partners. We should be catering partners. I mean, think about it! You're not working right now, and we have such a great time together!
Monica: I can cook and you can take care of the money.
Phoebe: Yeah. Oh! It'll be like I have a wife in the fifties!
Joey: Hey, listen, I gotta tell ya, I feel kinda bad taking credit for this, because man, am I gonna get a lot of credit for this!
Chandler: Oh, uh, yeah... I just knew that sometimes when you're writing, you... you don't always know the exact time.
Kathy: No, I... I didn't mean the pen. Thank you for the book.
Kathy: The Velveteen Rabbit. I kinda have the feeling you had something to do with it.
Kathy: Well, uh, when Joey gave it to me, he said, "This is 'cause I know ya like Rabbits, and I know ya like cheese." Thanks. I love it. And I know how hard it must have been for you to find.
Monica: Yeah. Anyway, he told me about your apartment. And, um, I couldn't sleep, thinking about it. So, uh, would it be okay if I cleaned it?
Ross: (trying to act manly in front of Janine) No I dont want to play video games, Joey!
Chandler: And I just want a million dollars! (He extends his hand hopefully.)
Ross: I guess so.
Rachel: Im serious, I really, I think I need just to have some...meaningless, sex y'know, with the next guy that I see.
Chandler: Well, I umm, I mean this is just off the top of my head now, umm but I have this friend. This actor friend and he would kill me if he thought I was doing this umm, but umm would it be possible for him to get an audition for your movie say on Thursday?
Rachel: Thank you. I yeah.
Ross: I mean after tomorrow night.
Rachel: No-no-no! No-no-no! Please Ross, I cant! I cant do it! (Starts to freak out.) Its just gonna freak me out!!!
Cop: Yeah. Ever since you flashed my badge at me, I kinda can't stop thinking about you. You're the prettiest, fake undercover whore I've ever seen.
Ross: Shut up! It was nice. I just... I don't think I'm the dirty-talking kind of guy, you know?
Monica: My boots in tan! Hey! Can you get a little closer so I can see the price?
Rachel: I gotta go! (Runs out.)
Monica: Yeah youre right. I dont know what I was thinking.
Chandler: Yeah, she seemed cool, attractive. Ill do it.
Rachel: Well obviously I wont be able to come, for those of you who havent checked their calendars today is my due date. Well yknow, I just want to take a moment and thank you guys for how great youve been during this time. I really couldnt have done it without you. And I have loved these last nine months! And even though I am so looking forward to the next part, I am really gonna miss being pregnant.
Chandler: Id be sad sure, but I wouldnt cry.
Emily: Ross, are you there? Ross, I dont know if you can hear this but (Ross has moved to the window, apparently so that he can hear better.) Im gonna talk anyway, uh, Im in the States with you sister and your friends and its all over with Colin. I came here to tell you that, and to tell youYes, Joey you can have all the chocolate you want, just take it! Uh, I came here to tell you that I love you.
Monica: I dont need a tissue! Im fine-d!
The Fan: Wow! Wow, thanks a lot! I just wanna say, I think youre really talented.
Joey: (laughs) I dont think so.
Monica: Oh, Im sorry. Of course I mean that. Interesting idea, umm, talk about it, but no.
Phoebe: Yeah I mean its probably nothing, but I just wanted to warn you that there might be something there.
Joey: Chandler, Chandler, yknow what we should do? You and I should go out and get some new sunglasses.
Mackenzie: I don't have any great ideas. I am eight.
Jill: I dont understand, do you want to go out with Ross?
Rachel: Im not telling you what to do! I am telling you what not to do!
Joanna: Thats fine, actually Im on the hiring committee, so therell be at least one friendly face.
Chandler: Ahh, I think it just moved. Its really poking me.
Ross: Here we go. Mona umm, I think its time we-we had a conversation about-about where things are with us.
Phoebe: Theyre just talking, and yknow what? Just because I think theyre soul mates doesnt mean anythings gonna happen.
Phoebe: Oh no, I dont believe in Western medicine. No, if you just apply pressure to these points right here. (Shes pinching the bit of skin between her right thumb and forefinger with her left hand.) Then your hand starts to hurt and you still have a headache, so thanks. (Takes the pills.)
Ross: Oh no! That-thatll just bring me down! This was great! I mean I-I-I was great! This is a great day! Yknow what? Im buying everyone coffee. All right? If someone would just grab my wallet, its in my pocket.
Rachel: Wow! I mean, I justI cant, I cant believe this. Yknow, I mean you think you know someone even, even Phoebe whos always been somewhat of a question mark.
Joey: We cant watch that! I mean thats Phoebe!
Joey: Yeah, try sticking it in the freezer for 20 minutes. (They all look around and then back at Joey.) Im tellin ya!
Ross: Oh, uh, can it wait a second Joey? I have to tell my parents something. No it cant? Okay.
Jill: Oh no! But I just walked past three sales and I didnt go in. How strong am I?
Phoebe: Okay, you know where you are better than I do. I was just curious.
Monica: Ill get everybody else (Does so), finally we can start celebrating my(She gasps and is stopped by the sight of Ross and Rachel making out in the hall.) Im sorry, uh apparently Ive opened the door to the past.
Monica: I wont care, because I know you will be feeling it all in here. (Points to her heart.)
Phoebe: (entering) Hey! Whats up? (Sees the TV) Oh my God! What am I doing?!!
Chandler: Yeah I know, but I figured a shot yknow? Maybe one of those stories would make me cry and then you wouldnt think I was yknow, all dead inside.
Joey: Well uh, I went down there and told him that no one treats my friends like that and that hed better come up here and apologize. Ill see you later. (Starts to leave)
Joey: Ugh, I cannot wait to ask her out!
Chandler: Aww, I love you so
Phoebe: I dont want to go into the whole thing, but umm, we have words and I kill him.
Joanna: No, no, that was my boss. I have to go.
Ross: You damn kids! You ring my bell one more time, I swear to (Opens the door to find Jill standing there.) Ohh, uh Jill. Umm, that-thats just a little game I play with the kids down the hall. Umm, theyve really taken a liking to me. (Quickly looks out to see if theyre watching.) Uhh whats-whats-whats the matter?
Jill: (entering) I dont want to talk about it.
Janine: Hey Joey, I got some beer for you.
Chandler: Look Joe, I know you wanted to do the wedding
Rachel: So you know, I I handed in that marketing report and I never got to hear what you thought.
Ross: ALL RIGHT!! Phoebe now come on! Will you please tell me what it is I did that mad you so mad at me!
Ursula: Yeah, can I help you with something?
Ross: I hate Chandler, the bastard ruined my life. (Rachel starts looking around and down, with a 'What the hell is going on?' look on her face.)
Rachel: Well, is Ross home? Maybe Ill just call him to see if hes actually seen her.
Ursula: No Im not.
Phoebe: Look, Im talking right now! Youreyou mean her.
Joey: I cant hear a word youre saying, my ears are ringing so bad.
(She grabs his arm and drags him over to a table where three beautiful women are sitting. Now, Im going to go out on a limb and say that their names are Stephanie, Karin, and Meg. Okay, so I looked at the credits. Of course, only Meg is named later on, so Ill have to guess who is Stephanie and who is Karin. But, well cross that bridge when we come to it.)
Rachel: Ross, I am telling you that she is using you to get back at me!
Phoebe: I know! But if I didnt work there, what else would I do?
Joey: I don't know whether it's just 'cause we're breakin' up or... what, but you have never looked so beautiful.
Monica: Listen Rachel, I feel really bad aboutWhat are you doing? (She sees that Rachel is unpacking.)
Phoebe: Oh no! No! I know how to handle it.
Phoebe: So, I just came from the company Ursula works for.
Rachel: Oh! I knew it! What happened?
Ross: Look, I uh, I tried not to kiss her, okay?
Chandler: (sees the roll) Yes!! I love you! I can't even remember what we were fighting about!
Monica: You used to tell girls you were a Kennedy. (being sat down) Ooh, uh, thanks. Wow, little tight, isn�t it? How d�you get a bigger table? You-you had a big table, but they made you move. Huh-huh, shut up Monica. Whoo, I suppose that Chandler will have the smoked duck.
Rachel: Well its only different if he wants it to be. I mean, Im not gonna ask him for anything.
Ross: Oh waithold it! But then I started thinking and I stopped the kissing.
Rachel: Yeah, I got that.
Rachel: Yeah I am, I am! Oh, but first of all, Monica, I would like to introduce you to my very talented colleage and more importantly my wonderful friend Gavin Mitchelle.
Chandler: (crying hysterically) I just dont see why those two cant work things out!
Rachel: But, theyre across the hall! I mean thats two doors away, it would take them a long time to peck their way back over here.
Phoebe: Oh, ok, you know what I don't get? The way guys can do so many mean things, and then not even care.
PHOEBE: OK, hi. For your information this is exactly what I wanted. This is a tattoo of the earth as seen from a great distance. It's the way my mother sees me from heaven.
Ross: I know. Thats why I did it. (With a big smile) Come on, are they really that bad?
Monica: Come on, get into bed! I want to prove to you that Im not sick! I wanna make you feel, as good as I feel. (Sneezes.)
Jill: Cant have?! Excuse me, the only thing I cant have is dairy! (Starts to storm out.)
Monica: I'm so sorry, I can't believe I did this, but I couldn't stop laughing at your Norman Mailer story.
Ross: No, I just think Monica was that fat.
Chandler: Sure I would!
Monica: Aunt Syl, stop yelling! All I'm saying is that if you had told me vegetarian lasagna, I would have made vegetarian lasagna. (pauses, listens to person on phone) Well, the meat's only every third layer, maybe you could scrape.
{Transcriber's Note: The credits list two characters, Tia and Samantha, who I assume are the sweaty women Joey and Chandler meet. However, I don't know which is which, so I've simply called them Woman #1 and Woman #2.}
Phoebe: What if I had taken that job at Merrill Lynch?
Ross: Im gonna call after you!
Rachel: Oh, Im sorry. Ross Tillman.
Ross: I think, sub-consciously
Monica: Rachel, if you want the little round waffles, you gotta have to wait until I find the little waffle iron.
Rachel: Ohh, I would love too.
Ross: Well isnt there something you can do to earn a little extra money? I mean, cant-cant you pick up, I dont know, an extra shift here?
Joey: Yeah for like a half an hour one night! Chandler, she wants you for the rest of her life! Youre so lucky! Look what I missed out on by not being there! Although you know what? It could never have worked like you guys did, cause you guys are perfect for each other. Yknow, we look at you and-and we see you together and it just it-it fits. Yknow? And you just know its gonna last forever.
Chandler: Yes I'm gonna put it back (Mocking Ross) exactly where I found it.
Ross: Good-good, Im-Im married. (Shows her his ring.)
Monica: (on machine) "Hi, it's Monica. I'm just checking in 'cause I got this message from you and I didn't know if it was old or new or what. So, I'm just checkin'. So let me know, or don't, whatever. I'm breezy."
MONICA: So uh, Joey and Chanlder, I, I think it's time that you take Dr. Greene over to your place.
Ross: No, its okay. Some-some kid asked me to pick it up for him, but I dont
Ross: I can't believe this. I was just being a good guy. I treated you with respect and understanding.