words in movies
Phoebe: Hi. Um, I want to start with a song thats about that moment when you suddenly realize what life is all about. OK, here we go. (plays a chord, then the lights go out) OK, thank you very much.
Monica: (into phone) Pants and a sweater? Why, mom? Who am I gonna meet in a blackout? Power company guys? Eligible looters? Could we talk about this later? OK. (hangs up)
Phoebe: Can I borrow the phone? I want to call my apartment and check on my grandma. (to Monica) What's my number?
Phoebe: Well, I never call me.
Chandler: She's right, it's Jill. Jill Goodacre. Oh my God. I am trapped in an ATM vestibule with Jill Goodacre! (pause) Is it a vestibule? Maybe it's an atrium. Oh, yeah, that is the part to focus on, you idiot!
Jill: (on phone) I'm fine. No, I'm not alone... I don't know, some guy.
Chandler: Oh! Some guy. Some guy. 'Hey Jill, I saw you with some guy last night. Yes, he was some guy.
Chandler: Yeah, about 300 guys I went to high school with. Yeah, thanks. (takes phone)
Monica: I have no idea what you just said.
Ross: The ride broke down. So, Carol and I went behind a couple of those mechanical Dutch children... then they fixed the ride, and we were asked never to return to the Magic Kingdom.
Rachel: Oh come on, I already went.
Rachel: I just never had a relationship with that kind of passion, you know, where you have to have somebody right there, in the middle of a theme park.
Rachel: I mean, do you think there are people who go through life never having that kind of...
Ross: But, um... I don't think that's going to be you.
Ross: Uh-uh. See, I see.... big passion in your future.
Ross: I do.
Ross: I'm taking my time, alright? I'm laying the groundwork. Yeah. I mean, every day I get just a little bit closer to...
Ross: I will, I will. See, I'm waiting for the right moment. (Joey looks at him) What? What, now?
Joey: Yeeeeaaaahhh! What's messing you up? The wine? The candles? The moonlight? You've just got to go up to her and say, 'Rachel, I think that...' (Rachel comes into the room behind them)
Phoebe: (singing) New York City has no power, and the milk is getting sour. But to me it is not scary, 'cause I stay away from dairy.... la la la, la la, la la... (she writes the lyrics down)
Joey: I, um, can't tell you.
Joey: OK, you've got to promise that you'll never, ever tell Ross that I told you.
Monica: Oh my God! I love him!
Phoebe: Yuh-huh! I was the last one to know when Chandler got bitten by the peacock at the zoo. I was the last one to know when you had a crush on Joey when he was moving in. (Monica gestures at Phoebe to shut up; Joey looks surprised but pleased) Looks like I was second to last.
Ross: OK, I have a question. Well, actually, it's not so much a question as.. more of a general wondering... ment.
Monica, Joey, and Phoebe: (singing) I'm on top of the world, looking down on creation and the only explanation I can find, is the wonders I've found ever since...
Chandler: You know, on second thought, gum would be perfection. (Jill gives him a stick of gum, and a strange look) 'Gum would be perfection'? 'Gum would be perfection.' Could have said 'gum would be nice,' or 'I'll have a stick,' but no, no, no, no. For me, gum is perfection. I loathe myself.
Rachel: (entering with Paolo, arm in arm) Everybody, this is Paolo. Paolo, I want you to meet my friends. This is Monica.
Rachel: Oh... Italy, I think.
Ross: No, I mean tonight, in the building. Suddenly. Into our lives.
Phoebe: Alright. I looked all over the building and I couldn't find the kitty anywhere.
Rachel: Oh, I found him. He was Paolo's cat.
Chandler: Nice going, imp. OK, it's OK. All I need to do is reach over and put it in my mouth. (Chandler slyly grabs the gum from the wall and slides it back in his mouth.)
Rachel: I have absolutely no idea.
Rachel: (to Monica and Phoebe) Oh my God, you guys, what am I doing? What am I doing? This is so un-me!
Phoebe: I know, I just want to bite his bottom lip. (Rachel looks at her) But I won't.
Phoebe: You know, did you ride mopeds? 'Cause I've heard... (they stare at her)... oh, I see... it's not about that right now. OK.
Rachel: Y'know, I know it's totally superficial and we have absolutely nothing in common, and we don't even speak the same language but Goooooooddddddd....
Ross: Listen. Um, listen. Something you should... know... um, Rachel and I... we're kind of a thing.
Ross: No, no, no. Technically the... sex is not... being had, but that's... see, that's not the point. See, um, the point is that... Rachel and I should be, er, together. You know, and if you get in the.... um...
Ross: No, no, that's not where I was going. Er, if you get in the... way, of us becoming a thing, then I would be, well, very sad.
Ross: OK, guys, guys? I have the definitive one. Mwwwooooo-hah-hah...
Jill: Well, goodbye Chandler. I had a great blackout. (she kisses him on the cheek) See ya.
Chandler: Hi, um, I'm account number 7143457. And, uh, I don't know if you got any of that, but I would really like a copy of the tape.
Eric: Uhh, I wont take no for an answer.
Chandler: Well, now, I actually have to get to work.
Rachel: Oh God! This is silly, Im gonna see you in a couple of hours! (They hug again.)
Ross: (stopping them) Okay-okay! Two very good points, look Ive known you both a long time, and Ive never seen either of you one/millionth as happy as youve been since youve got together. Do you really want to throw that all away over a room? That is so silly. Now wh-what is more important, love or silliness?
Frank Sr.: Yes. Yes it is. I burned the formula and I put your diapers on backwards. I mean, I made up a song to sing you to sleep, but that made you cry even more!
Richard: And-and then I sneak out and before Monica can her parents come in.
Phoebe: Oh, I wish I could, but I don't want to.
Monica: Ok. Great. I am so glad that you are here. We’re really excited about getting this process started.
Ursula: Right... Oh, I got something for you, too.
Phoebe: Um, oh, I got you a birthday present.
Ross: Okay, maybe this is so hard, because there aren't 50 states. Let me tell you something, I have 49 states, and there are no more! I-I think, I should be able to eat something.
Phoebe: How'd you know I was coming?
Mrs. Geller: It really was. Oh, c'mere, sweetheart. (Hugs her) Y'know, I think it might be time for you to start using night cream.
Phoebe: I can't believe you did this.
Rachel: Why you guys this isn't funny, all right? If I wanted this cake to be a disaster I would have baked it myself!
Rachel: I dont know. Yknow, they didnt get us anything.
Ross: No. No, I gotta go home sometime.
Chandler: Okay. Okay. (He goes to the closet, moves the clothes out of the way, and notices an empty hanger. He takes the empty hanger and bends it all out of shape. Then he holds it out as if hes giving it to her.) Yes honey, I made it myself. (He throws it down and goes to her chest, grabs something, goes to the bed table, and takes out a pair of scissors. He turns around and holds the scissors to the crotch of the panties he just removed.) I cant do it. I cant do it. (He throws them both down and continues looking. He opens another closet door and finds a tape.) Oh! Oh! A mixed tape! A mixed tape!! (He runs out into the living room.)
Chandler: Yeah, and not that you would, but I wouldnt hang out with all the guys in my office.
Monica: (as Rachel) I am. I'm that stupid. (Little laugh.)
Monica: I gave you one job! (Starts to examin the lasagne through the bottom of the glass pan.)
Chandler: You know, you think I would.
Ross: I had a 'K'. Where's where's my 'K'?
Monica: I cant! I spent so much money on them and I told Chandler that Id wear them all the time, I just cant give them away!
Rachel: (looking at her watch) Oh my God, I gotta go to work!
ROSS: I don't know, I don't think mom and dad would mind. Remember when you were 9 and Richard was 30, how dad used to say, 'God I hope they get together.'
Joey: No, no, no, don't say "listen." I know that "listen." I've said that "listen."
Joey: All right well, I guess I gotta go get a job. Im gonna go see my agent.
Joey: I know...
Phoebe: (as Ursula) That's right, I don't... But I was, I was drunk on you!
Phoebe: Mike knows I'm coming, and if I don't show up he'll think it's because of him! And I don't want to lose face! That's a very serious thing in my culture.
Chandler: I'm sorry, I didn't catch your name. Paul, was it?
RYAN: If I had one wish, it would be to build a time machine, go back to when I was 7, when Jimmy Hauser had the chicken pox. I would grab that kid and rub him all over my face.
Ross: You did! Oh.... I always figured you just thought I was Monica's geeky older brother.
Ross: I don't know.
Rachel: Just a touch. Mon, I don't understand. I mean, you've been dating this guy since like, what... his midterms? I mean, why all the sudden are you so... Oh.
Mr. Geller: I think I accidentally used Monicas boxes to keep the water away from the Porsche.
Joey: (to a table of strangers) You guys need anything, cause Im heading up there.
Kathy: Umm, (moves her hands down to his butt) I love this touchy. Can I take it to work with me?
Rachel: Ugh, horrible! I did the stupidest, most embarrassing thing!
Ross: Oh man, I can't believe you guys are leaving this place.
Ross: Please, help me! I have a date tonight. It has to go well okayIm scared for my health!
Chandler: Uhh, a T-shirt that says, "I dont belong here."
Phoebe: (to Joey): Oh I see, so then, you were lying.
Rachel: (laughs) Oh, I'm sure gonna miss pretending to laugh at your weird jokes that I don't get.
Phoebe: OK, Monica? I had another answer all ready.
Phoebe: I could be a secretary.
Ross: No, no, no, no, no, I don't want to know, absolutely not. I think, you know, I think you should know until you look down there, and say, oop, there it is! (pauses) Or isn't...
Joey: (Looking at himself in the reflection on a knife) How do I look?
Phoebe: Well look, you dont really like the one from uptown and youre too exhausted from dating the one up in Poughkeepsie, so I say you just end them both. Okay? You take a train up to Poughkeepsie and break up with her, and on your way back you break up with uptown. And then by the time you get home tonight, youre done!
Joey: No, I don't think so, see Ross, because I think you love her.
Tour Guide: Im Rhonda, (motions to her breasts) and these arent real! (Joey and Ross look at each other, shocked)
PHOEBE: I know it's kind of weird, but I mean, she was a big part of my life there, you know, and now I just feel kind of alone.
Monica: Please! I am not as bad as Ross.
Monica: I don't think so.
Phoebe: If I let go of my hair, my head will fall off.
Joey: I mean, this soap opera is a great gig, but... am I missing opportunities? You know, I've always thought of myself as a serious actor. I mean, should I be trying to do more independent movies?
Chandler: Oh, thats uh, thats pretty nice but Im gonna go with the one I picked first.
Mrs. Geller: Oh, dear. Jack, how do I turn this off?
Ross: Alright, ok, let's do it. (Ross sits down at the desk and they all gather around him) Uhm, I know we start by discussing the shortcomings of carbon dating... uhm, and then, then I move on to what is clearly the defining moment of the Mesozoic era, the breakup of Pangea, hello! (Rachel and Joey look confused) And then, there's the... eh... there's the overview of the Triassic.
Phoebe and Rachel: Yes, we should. I think we should.
Rachel: Oooooh. (reads letter) (surprised): Oh! I got an interview! I got an interview!
Chandler: Y'know, if you're gonna work late, I could look in on him for you.
Rachel: No, I know, I know, and I'm sure your little boy is not going to grow up to be one.
Joey: Hey! (Monica turns and looks at him) Now Im a man of the cloth, but I still have feelings!
Ross: Try sixty-five million years ago, and then try sssshhhhhh.... My tenure review board met today and I hear it's looking really good.
Phoebe: Yeah, she turned you into this-this-this untrusting, crazy, jealous, sycophant. (They all look at her.) All right, so I dont know what sycophant means, but the rest is right.
Phoebe: What am I gonna do?! What am I gonna do?! I cant call my office theyll kill me! I cant call my clients theyll kill themselves! Great, now my chest hearts.
Phoebe: I mean I guess, I just have to... tell David that nothing can happen between us. Unless I don't... You know, complicated moral situation, no right, no wrong...
Chandler: Oh, I don't know, a million?
Rachel: Ha, I made you look....
Ross: Uh-uhWow! Uh, I thought you guys were just like making jokes, I had no idea. What you know what? You guys are wrong. Uh yes, there is a chronological age difference but I never notice it. You know why? Because she is very mature. Besides, it doesnt really matter to me what you guys think. I mean, Im the one dating Elizabeth, not you!
Ross: Oh, I am very in.
Monica: Thats better. 90 seconds is a long time not to think about it except all I did was think about it.
Monica: No! Listen, Im not gonna go through this with you again, okay. Just once I wanna beat when you cant blame it on the broken nose, the buzzer, or the fact that you thought you were getting mono. Lets just call this, tie score and its halftime.
Joey: No, Im gonna!! Thats right! Yeah, you made me feel really guilty about goin out with that girl! Like-like-like I did something terrible to you! And now Pheebs, youre doing the same thing!
Rachel: Well, I just lost a job, and I'd like to raise the bet five bucks. Does anybody have a problem with that?
Ross: I bet two dollars. (throws it in)
Rachel: OK... see your two... and I raise you twenty. (throws it in)
Rachel: (to Monica): Thank you. (to Ross): I saw your twenty-five, and I raise you... seven.
ROSS: I got bottled breast milk.
Rachel: (To Monica) Im okay! Im okay! (She knocks on Mr. Heckles's window.) Mr. Heckles, Mr. Heckles could you help me please?
Charlie: Oh God! I am so sorry, but... (she puts her hand on Ross's cheek) I mean it's... there's so much history between us, you know...
Joey: I don't know. You dumped her on New Year's.
Chandler: (to Ross): I thought we had them!
Joey: Man, it must be so cool remembering stuff like that! I don't have any past life memories.
Phoebe: Sven I don't understand what you're saying! What is wrong with the flowers? Lorkins? What the hell are lorkins?
Rachel: Oh, I'm sorry. Oh, this is so stupid! I mean, I gave Barry up, right? I should be happy for them! I am, I'm happy for them.
Joey: Heh... I was bluffing.
Chandler: Hey, Ross, I just wanted to apologize... (looks at laptop screen)..don't tell me you actually made those gay pictures of me?
Rachel: Barry who I almost.
Chandler: Im not freaking out. Why would I be freaking out? A woman named Heldi called and said we were getting married, but that happens everyday. (Does one of those Chandler noises.)
Phoebe: Yeah, I know, he's sweet, but it's just not fun anymore, you know? I don't know if it's me, or his hunger strike, or, I don't know.
Phoebe: Fine! Ill call Zurich and move some money around.
Rachel: Well, if you see him, will you please tell him that Im looking for him and that this I am not gonna throw up!
Cashier: I can tell you work out. (Ross is please and Rachel looks at him confused.) A paleontologist who works out, youre like Indiana Jones. (Rachel has a disbelieving look on her face.)
Rachel: Well, I mean, do you think you can ever have both? Y'know? Someone who's like, who's like your best friend, but then also can make your toes curl?
Joey: (bursts out laughing again) I can't believe you didn't know it was a line!
Ross: I see your twenty, raise you twenty-five. (throws it in)
Ross: Wait-wait. I, I got it. I was there.