words in movies
Chandler: Yeah it is really pricey. I mean, I freaked when I first heard the numbers.
Chandler: It was pretty simple actually, I came up with a couple of cost-cutting solutions, wrote out a list and Monica told me to go to hell.
Mike: I heard that weddings are like a 40 billion dollar a year industry.
Mike: I think it would make me wanna marry you even more. (he kisses her)
Joey: Hey, maybe I should stop by! She could be a soap opera fan! It's very impressive when the little people know a celebrity.
Monica: Ok, so I think I'm just about done here, unless you have any bad stuff hidden somewhere, like... porn or cigarettes?
Chandler: (he stands up and he feels very offended) I don't, and I'm offended by the insinuation!
Joey: (going out with the VCR in his hand) Well, I guess we'll never know whose it is!
Charity guy: May I help you?
Phoebe: Well, I think you're gonna appreciate it the crap out of this one (she gives him a check)
Phoebe: Sure, I so glad we did this. It feels so good!
Charity guy: Oh, actually, that's the shirt I wore to the gym.
Rachel: Oh hey Ross... Listen, I heard about you and Charlie. I'm really sorry.
Ross: Well, I was thinking of taking Emma to the playground!
Ross: Like I said I was thinking of taking Emma to the museum of knives and fire!
Rachel: Ok, look, Ross. I do not want Emma going to the playground.
Rachel: (upset) All right, well, if you must know... I had a traumatic... swing incident... when I was little.
Rachel: Yes, I was 4 years old and I was on the swing and then all of a sudden my hair got tangled in the chain. And to get me out my mom had to-had to cut a big chunk of my hair! (crying) And it was uneven for weeks!
Ross: (sarcastic) And you made it through that? I wonder who's gonna play you in the movie!
Rachel: Ok, fine! You can make fun of me. I do not want Emma going there. And I was thinking Claire Danes.
Ross: Space is filled with orbiting children. (pause) Look, please, just come on, you know, when you’ll see the look on Emma’s face, I swear you won’t regret it.
Rachel: Irrational, huh? All right, well, I’ll remember that the next time you freak out about a spider in your apartment!
Ross: Oh, yeah, that’s the same, I am sure there are thirty different species of poisonous swings!
Monica: We’re waiting for the adoption lady, but, hey, I’m glad you’re here. I was cleaning this morning and I found this (she puts a box on the table and opens it). I don’t know if you wanna use it, but…
Phoebe: Awe, this is so sweet of you! But you know what? I won’t be needing a veil, I actually won’t be wearing a dress at all!
Monica: I told you! I am not coming to a naked wedding!
Monica: That’s crazy! (Phoebe looks bewildered). I am sorry. I just can’t imagine giving up my one wedding day like that!
Phoebe: We, you know, we’re different! We don’t care about having a huge party. (She picks up the veil) This is really nice for you, but, oh, please, I put this on? (she puts it on) And, ow, I look (she looks her reflex image on a toaster), why, well, radiant. (pause) All right, well, who cares, I don’t need a pretty veil and a fancy dress.
Monica: Ow! (Chandler slaps her on her back) Oh, that sounds nice! I am just there for jury duty. They really spruce that place up!
Phoebe: It’s ok, it’s ok. I made my decision. What I really want is a great big wedding (she covers her mouth)
Phoebe: Well, I’ll just ask for it back!
Chandler: I don’t think you can do that!
Rachel: I know (she touches Emma’s head) but they’re just so beautiful! Oh, my God, I just pulled one out.
Ross: I promise you she’s safe! No watch how much she loves this.
Ross: See, I told you!
Rachel: Awe! (Emma laughs) Oh my God! Looks, she’s a little dare-devil! Oh, let me push, can I push?
Ross: Ok! (he takes the camera and walks backwards to take a shot) See? Scared of swings, I bet you feel pretty silly (a swinging boy knocks him down) Ow!
Charity guy: Wow! Are you here to make another donation the same day? I don’t think that that’s ever happened before.
Mike (to the charity guy): Oh my God, I love your shirt!
Phoebe: I am sorry. I am, but this wedding is just really important to me.
Phoebe: Hey, that’s not fair! A person’s wedding is important! And especially to me! Ok? I didn’t have a graduation party! And I didn’t go to Prom. And I spent my sweet sixteen being chased round a tire yard by an escaped mental patient who is his own words wanted to “kill me” or whatever. So I deserve a real celebration and I am not gonna let some sweaty little man make me feel badly about it.( She storms out)
Laura: Hi, I am Laura, I am here for your adoption interview.
Monica: Hi, I am Monica and this is Chandler. Please come in.
Monica: Ok. Great. I am so glad that you are here. We’re really excited about getting this process started.
Laura: You know, I... I feel like I've been here before. Are any other couples in the building adopting?
Laura: I just realized why I remember this place.
Laura: Oh, it's nothing. I went on a date with a guy who lived in this building and it didn't end very well.
Laura: Well, I'm sorry I brought it up. So, are either one of you planning on staying at home with your child... (someone knocks on the door)
Ross: SON OF A BITCH! (turns to his right to see three kids staring at him) (To the kids) Oh relax! I didn't say the 'F' word! (They go away)
Rachel: Ross, see! I told you, those swings are evil! Alright, that is it. That is the last time Emma is getting on one of those things for her entire life.
Ross: No wait, okay, okay, I have an idea. I want you to get on the swing, okay? And you'll see that there's nothing to be afraid of.
Rachel: (looks at him suspiciously) I know what this is all about... You've always been jealous of my hair.
Ross: Look, I just think you're an adult, okay? And you should get over your silly fears.
Ross: I know. (Rachel bends down to Emma and Ross looks over his shoulder again, afraid)
Chandler: Oh, just like I said. That crazy... Bert... roaming the halls. (Joey bangs on the door again)
Mike: Well, hey, at least you're getting a proper wedding. I mean, you really deserve that.
Phoebe: Yeah, I really do. You know, I had nothing growing up. (thinks for a few seconds) Just like the kids I took the money from.
Mike: No! No, no. I see where this is going. Don't make me go back there.
Phoebe: Look, I can't have a wedding with this money now. It's tainted.
Laura: Well, I must say, this seems like a lovely environment to raise a child in.
Laura: Oh! Well, actually, before we look around, let me make sure I have everything I need up to here...
Monica: (Pulls Laura into the spare room) Why don't I show you the baby's room?
Joey: Well, you wouldn't let me in, so I thought you were in trouble.
Monica: (laughs nervously as well, Laura looks confused) (To Laura) Some people don't get him, but I think he's really funny! (She takes Laura to their own bedroom).
Joey: (quivering with anger) I did not care for that!
Joey: I forgot my bat.
Chandler: I can explain... Joey...
Joey: Uhm... ok... uhm... Well, yeah... You have got some nerve, coming back here. I can't believe you never called me.
Joey: Oh... yeah... Probably you don't even remember my name. It's Joey, by the way. And don't bother telling me yours, because I totally remember it... lady. Yeah! I waited weeks for you to call me.
Laura: I gave you my number, you never called me.
Laura: (embarrassed towards Chandler and Monica) Well, I'm pretty sure I gave you my number.
Joey: Really? Think about it. Come on! You're a beautiful woman, smart, funny, we had a really good time, huh? If I had your number, why wouldn't I call you?
Laura: I don't know... Well, maybe I'm wrong... I'm sorry...
Joey: No, no, hey, no! Too late for apologies... ok? You broke my heart. You know how many women I had to sleep with to get over you? (and he leaves the apartment, leaving her shocked)
Joey: (acting sad) NO! I waited a long time, I can't wait anymore... (and closes the door behind him)
Laura: Boy, you people are nice... And I've got to say... I think you're going to make excellent parents.
Charity guy: Are you here to take more money? Because, I think what you're looking for is an ATM.
Charity guy: If I haven't said so already sir, (sarcastically pointing to Phoebe) congratulations!
Charity guy: On behalf of the Children of New York, I reject your money.
Mike: Well, I mean... It sounds good to me. And that way we can save up, come back in a few years and make an even bigger donation.
Monica: Hello...? Oh hi... Oh my God...! Really...? I can't wait to tell Chandler... Ok, goodbye. (hangs up)
Rachel: Ok... I got a spider. There were two, I picked the bigger one.
Rachel: A-alright! I can do this.
Ross: There you go! Good for you! And you know what, I'm actually getting used to this little guy. I don't really even feel him in here anymore.
Ross: (on tape) I know. Hey remember remember the night they got engaged? How uh, you and I almost
Phoebe: All right, Ill see you downstairs then.
Phoebe: Sure! I feel so bad for you; I broke my leg once too.
Chandler: (in a serious, businesslike tone) Rachel, could I see you for a moment?
Ross: Yeah but Pottery Barn! Yknow what I think? Its just she-shes weird. Yknow its because shes a twin. Twins are weird.
Nurse: I think I know who youre talking about.
Rachel: Ross, you stay here and talk, Im gonna go have a baby.
Monica: I think we found a place.
The Cooking Teacher: Oh Alessandros! I love that place!
Chandler: Okay, okay, but dont worry, because we also have cereals, muffins, waffles, and, jams, jellies, and marmalades. Which Im fairly certain are the same thing.
Rachel: Honey, I don't know how to tell you this, but um, if something were to happen to Ross or to myself <Ross and Rachel knock on wood> um you wouldn't get the baby.
Phoebe: Yeah! How would you like it if I sent you to Lee Majors house and told you that he liked you, and you went down there and you found out that he didnt like you? How would you feel?
Phoebe: Yes, while I was in the chair! Thats why I take such good care of my teeth now, y'know, its not about oral hygiene, I floss to save lives!
Monica: No, a guy would be saying, "Im never gonna get to sleep with anyone else." Oh my God! Im never gonna get to sleep with anyone else! Ive been so busy planning the wedding that I forgot about all the things that Id be giving up! I mean, I Im never gonna have a first kiss again.
Phoebe: W-wI justits thatI haveyknow I have-I have an appointment. And its very important.
Cliff: Im 33.
FBOB: OK, look, this isn't the first time somebody's said something to me about this, but, I don't know... I always made excuses about it, like... uhhh... 'I'm just a social drinker,' or, 'C'mon, it's Flag Day.'
Joey: Oh thats terrible. Im-Im really sorry.
Ross: Just three?! Im dilated three!
Janice: I .cant .believe this!
Man: Yeah. Me. (The elevator door opens.) Oh hey, thats me. (Rolls onto the elevator.) Hey uh, I take it youre just visiting someone.
Mrs. Green: Oh my look at that. Only three weeks to go, now have you picked your nanny yet? Now I dont want you to use your housekeeper cause it would just split her focus.
Janice: I mean this is so great! Were gonna be baby buddies! (Does the laugh.)
Sid: I still cant believe it! Im the luckiest guy in the world!
Rachel: I get it!
Mike: I gotta tell you, I can't believe I'm doing this with you. Although I did just get out of a nine-year relationship, so I guess I should be open and taking some risks.
Chandler: I can't believe you'd want us to raise Emma.
Ross: (disinterested) Hey-yeah. (He hurries up to the counter.) Hey Gunther, can I have a scone please? (To the gang.) Wanna hear some good news? Someone I know is getting married! Yeah! And weddings are happy occasions! Oh, by-the-by it's my ex-wife Emily!
Ross: Well, Im sorry, but ah, look if youre not working with him anymore, why do you have to still do stuff with him?
Chandler: Well let me think about that, while I remove my pants!
Chandler: I think it's winning.
Cecilia: And guess what? Good news! I got another job!
Mrs. Geller: Just think about it. If you dont, Ill talk more about humping.
Chandler: (suppressing a smile) What I do do is manage to uh, create an atmosphere of support for the people working with me.
Monica: I cant believe this is taking so long. How are you doing?
Chandler: Weirdest thing. Did I hear(A nurse opens the privacy screen and Chandler sees Janice)Mother of God its true!
Joey: Remoray. Its Portuguese. We need that information; Im a doctor.
Joey: I thought I did! Oh hey guess what? The premiere is next week and youre all invited! (They all gasp.)
Janice: Oh, this should be easy. I have a very wide pelvis. You remember Chandler.
Cliff: No, Im sorry. Its just my foot itches like crazy.
Phoebe: Oh, Ill get it. (She gets up and grabs a spoon.)
Chandler: also I was the point person on my companys transition from the KL-5 to GR-6 system.
Monica: I thought I was making headway, everyone was smiling at me all day, I get off work and I find out that they wrote this (puts on her chef hat) on my chefs hat. (The hat says Quit, bitch)
Dr. Long: Actually, I think youre ready to go to the delivery room.
Joey: Hey, Im not interested in her sweater! Its whats underneath her sweater that counts. And besides, since ah, since when do you care who Im going out with?
Chandler: Well you should meet my uncle, Bada. (Pause) Ill let myself out.
Amy: I don't believe this, hold on a second. You guys die and I don't get your baby?
Phoebe: Youre right, that was wrong. Im sorry. Im so sorry. Its just that I liked you so much. Can we just, can we just start over?
Cliff: I dont think so.
Cliff: And then you tried to make me think that I was crazy.
Phoebe: It's not mine, I didn't earn it, if I kept it, it would be like stealing.
Rachel: Um look I was thinking.. If its ok with Monica I would like to invite Amy to Thanksgiving.
Rachel: I cant!
Dr. Long: Here we go! Okay, keep pushing! Wait! I see something.
Rachel: I cant. I cant push anymore, I cant.
Rachel: Im sorry, I cant!
Rachel: I cant. Please, you do it for me.
Katie: Oh umm, actually I umm
Rachel: Chandler, that's not enough. I mean what if she gets you a great present, two medium presents, and a bunch of little presents? And you've just gotten her one great present? I mean that's just gonna make her feel bad. Why would you do that to her Chandler? Why? Why?
Joey: She said she wants to slather my body with stuff and then lick it off. I'm not even sure what slathering is, but I definitely want to be a part of it.
Rachel: I was reliving it.
Rachel: Oh nothing I Sorry, I just cant stop crying.
Ross: So I guess were back to uh, Baby Girl.
Rachel: Yeah, and yknow what? I love them both, so why dont you just pick one and thatll be it.
Monica: I dont want to say.
Rachel: "Im Monica, I dont get phone messages from interesting people. Ever!"
Joey: You hung up on the pizza place? I dont hang up on your friends.
Tag: I know I havent worked in an office before, and I really dont have a lot of experience, but uh
Rachel: Oh, Im not doing it alone. I have Ross.
Rachel: Oh, Im fine. (Gasps in pain as she sits down.)
Monica: How cool is this?! We know three down! Im touching three down! (She has her hand on his shoulder.)
Janice: Im telling you Rachel, listen to Janice. They all say theyre gonna be there until they start their real family.
Rachel: Well IThats never gonna happen with Ross.
Ross: Well I I told him that if he ever hurt you I would hunt him down and kick his ass! (The girls all laugh.) What?! What?! What is the matter with everybody?! I am serious! I would kick his ass! (The laugh harder.)
Janice: I hate to be the one to say it, but honey you two (Her and Emma) are on your own.
Eric: I dont think they have a name for it. Its just I get nervous; I start sweating like crazy.
Janice: Im gonna leave the three of you alone.
Ross: I mean we dont want to go down that road do we?
Ross: Im sorry, but we have to have some boundaries! My God, Im dying.
Rachel: Really its nothing. Im just
Phoebe: I know. I know. I know. I know, and if you try to make it more you might wreck it.
Rachel: Ok-dokey, Joey, listen. This is gonna be bridesmaid central, all right? We're gonna have hair and make-up going on in the bathroom and oh, I had to move a couple of things in the fridge to make room for the corsages.
Joey: Okay, how long was I watching that woman?
Rachel: Joey. Honey what would I do without you?
Joey: Yeah, I guess so.
Rachel: So uh I guess we should make it official huh?
Rachel: Uh yeah, actually I kinda need to talk to you too.
Joey: Oh, Im sorry. I meant no.
Chandler: Wait. Before we go in, I just want you to know I love you. I had a great time on our honeymoon, and I cant wait to go in there and spend the rest of our life together.
Mr. Geller: So when do I get to meet Emma and show her this? (Pulls a bouquet of flowers out of his sleeve.)
Ross: Youre weird today. (He turns to Rachel and Joey puts the ring back.) (To Rachel) Listen I uh, wanted to talk to you about something.
Rachel: I know, I still need to talk to you.
Phoebe: (To Monica) Oh and I need to talk to you.
Chandler: I figured Id buy those. Pat, Id like to buy a vow. (Laughs)
Joey: Really? Me? Wow! I dont even know any huge gay people!
Joey: Dude I just did something terrible.
Janine: I dont know, theyre just a little blah!
Chandler: That was you?! I thought it was Jack!
Amy: Listen, um about the hair straightener, honey.. I really need one. I'm going to have dinner at my boyfriend's house.
Ross: What?! When have I ever touched myself in front of you guys?