words in movies
Chandler: Yeah it is really pricey. I mean, I freaked when I first heard the numbers.
Chandler: It was pretty simple actually, I came up with a couple of cost-cutting solutions, wrote out a list and Monica told me to go to hell.
Mike: I heard that weddings are like a 40 billion dollar a year industry.
Mike: I think it would make me wanna marry you even more. (he kisses her)
Joey: Hey, maybe I should stop by! She could be a soap opera fan! It's very impressive when the little people know a celebrity.
Monica: Ok, so I think I'm just about done here, unless you have any bad stuff hidden somewhere, like... porn or cigarettes?
Chandler: (he stands up and he feels very offended) I don't, and I'm offended by the insinuation!
Joey: (going out with the VCR in his hand) Well, I guess we'll never know whose it is!
Charity guy: May I help you?
Phoebe: Well, I think you're gonna appreciate it the crap out of this one (she gives him a check)
Phoebe: Sure, I so glad we did this. It feels so good!
Charity guy: Oh, actually, that's the shirt I wore to the gym.
Rachel: Oh hey Ross... Listen, I heard about you and Charlie. I'm really sorry.
Ross: Well, I was thinking of taking Emma to the playground!
Ross: Like I said I was thinking of taking Emma to the museum of knives and fire!
Rachel: Ok, look, Ross. I do not want Emma going to the playground.
Rachel: (upset) All right, well, if you must know... I had a traumatic... swing incident... when I was little.
Rachel: Yes, I was 4 years old and I was on the swing and then all of a sudden my hair got tangled in the chain. And to get me out my mom had to-had to cut a big chunk of my hair! (crying) And it was uneven for weeks!
Ross: (sarcastic) And you made it through that? I wonder who's gonna play you in the movie!
Rachel: Ok, fine! You can make fun of me. I do not want Emma going there. And I was thinking Claire Danes.
Ross: Space is filled with orbiting children. (pause) Look, please, just come on, you know, when you’ll see the look on Emma’s face, I swear you won’t regret it.
Rachel: Irrational, huh? All right, well, I’ll remember that the next time you freak out about a spider in your apartment!
Ross: Oh, yeah, that’s the same, I am sure there are thirty different species of poisonous swings!
Monica: We’re waiting for the adoption lady, but, hey, I’m glad you’re here. I was cleaning this morning and I found this (she puts a box on the table and opens it). I don’t know if you wanna use it, but…
Phoebe: Awe, this is so sweet of you! But you know what? I won’t be needing a veil, I actually won’t be wearing a dress at all!
Monica: I told you! I am not coming to a naked wedding!
Monica: That’s crazy! (Phoebe looks bewildered). I am sorry. I just can’t imagine giving up my one wedding day like that!
Phoebe: We, you know, we’re different! We don’t care about having a huge party. (She picks up the veil) This is really nice for you, but, oh, please, I put this on? (she puts it on) And, ow, I look (she looks her reflex image on a toaster), why, well, radiant. (pause) All right, well, who cares, I don’t need a pretty veil and a fancy dress.
Monica: Ow! (Chandler slaps her on her back) Oh, that sounds nice! I am just there for jury duty. They really spruce that place up!
Phoebe: It’s ok, it’s ok. I made my decision. What I really want is a great big wedding (she covers her mouth)
Phoebe: Well, I’ll just ask for it back!
Chandler: I don’t think you can do that!
Rachel: I know (she touches Emma’s head) but they’re just so beautiful! Oh, my God, I just pulled one out.
Ross: I promise you she’s safe! No watch how much she loves this.
Ross: See, I told you!
Rachel: Awe! (Emma laughs) Oh my God! Looks, she’s a little dare-devil! Oh, let me push, can I push?
Ross: Ok! (he takes the camera and walks backwards to take a shot) See? Scared of swings, I bet you feel pretty silly (a swinging boy knocks him down) Ow!
Charity guy: Wow! Are you here to make another donation the same day? I don’t think that that’s ever happened before.
Mike (to the charity guy): Oh my God, I love your shirt!
Phoebe: I am sorry. I am, but this wedding is just really important to me.
Phoebe: Hey, that’s not fair! A person’s wedding is important! And especially to me! Ok? I didn’t have a graduation party! And I didn’t go to Prom. And I spent my sweet sixteen being chased round a tire yard by an escaped mental patient who is his own words wanted to “kill me” or whatever. So I deserve a real celebration and I am not gonna let some sweaty little man make me feel badly about it.( She storms out)
Laura: Hi, I am Laura, I am here for your adoption interview.
Monica: Hi, I am Monica and this is Chandler. Please come in.
Monica: Ok. Great. I am so glad that you are here. We’re really excited about getting this process started.
Laura: You know, I... I feel like I've been here before. Are any other couples in the building adopting?
Laura: I just realized why I remember this place.
Laura: Oh, it's nothing. I went on a date with a guy who lived in this building and it didn't end very well.
Laura: Well, I'm sorry I brought it up. So, are either one of you planning on staying at home with your child... (someone knocks on the door)
Ross: SON OF A BITCH! (turns to his right to see three kids staring at him) (To the kids) Oh relax! I didn't say the 'F' word! (They go away)
Rachel: Ross, see! I told you, those swings are evil! Alright, that is it. That is the last time Emma is getting on one of those things for her entire life.
Ross: No wait, okay, okay, I have an idea. I want you to get on the swing, okay? And you'll see that there's nothing to be afraid of.
Rachel: (looks at him suspiciously) I know what this is all about... You've always been jealous of my hair.
Ross: Look, I just think you're an adult, okay? And you should get over your silly fears.
Ross: I know. (Rachel bends down to Emma and Ross looks over his shoulder again, afraid)
Chandler: Oh, just like I said. That crazy... Bert... roaming the halls. (Joey bangs on the door again)
Mike: Well, hey, at least you're getting a proper wedding. I mean, you really deserve that.
Phoebe: Yeah, I really do. You know, I had nothing growing up. (thinks for a few seconds) Just like the kids I took the money from.
Mike: No! No, no. I see where this is going. Don't make me go back there.
Phoebe: Look, I can't have a wedding with this money now. It's tainted.
Laura: Well, I must say, this seems like a lovely environment to raise a child in.
Laura: Oh! Well, actually, before we look around, let me make sure I have everything I need up to here...
Monica: (Pulls Laura into the spare room) Why don't I show you the baby's room?
Joey: Well, you wouldn't let me in, so I thought you were in trouble.
Monica: (laughs nervously as well, Laura looks confused) (To Laura) Some people don't get him, but I think he's really funny! (She takes Laura to their own bedroom).
Joey: (quivering with anger) I did not care for that!
Joey: I forgot my bat.
Chandler: I can explain... Joey...
Joey: Uhm... ok... uhm... Well, yeah... You have got some nerve, coming back here. I can't believe you never called me.
Joey: Oh... yeah... Probably you don't even remember my name. It's Joey, by the way. And don't bother telling me yours, because I totally remember it... lady. Yeah! I waited weeks for you to call me.
Laura: I gave you my number, you never called me.
Laura: (embarrassed towards Chandler and Monica) Well, I'm pretty sure I gave you my number.
Joey: Really? Think about it. Come on! You're a beautiful woman, smart, funny, we had a really good time, huh? If I had your number, why wouldn't I call you?
Laura: I don't know... Well, maybe I'm wrong... I'm sorry...
Joey: No, no, hey, no! Too late for apologies... ok? You broke my heart. You know how many women I had to sleep with to get over you? (and he leaves the apartment, leaving her shocked)
Joey: (acting sad) NO! I waited a long time, I can't wait anymore... (and closes the door behind him)
Laura: Boy, you people are nice... And I've got to say... I think you're going to make excellent parents.
Charity guy: Are you here to take more money? Because, I think what you're looking for is an ATM.
Charity guy: If I haven't said so already sir, (sarcastically pointing to Phoebe) congratulations!
Charity guy: On behalf of the Children of New York, I reject your money.
Mike: Well, I mean... It sounds good to me. And that way we can save up, come back in a few years and make an even bigger donation.
Monica: Hello...? Oh hi... Oh my God...! Really...? I can't wait to tell Chandler... Ok, goodbye. (hangs up)
Rachel: Ok... I got a spider. There were two, I picked the bigger one.
Rachel: A-alright! I can do this.
Ross: There you go! Good for you! And you know what, I'm actually getting used to this little guy. I don't really even feel him in here anymore.
Rachel: This was such a huge mistake. I cant tell him Phoebe. I cant, I cant, I cant, I cant
Dr. Green: I have no idea, I went to the bathroom. So sweetie, you were starting to tell me what is uh, what is new with you.
Dr. Green: (laughs) Poppy. (To Phoebe) Oh, Im gonna be a poppy. (Stops laughing) So when is the wedding?
Mona: So, I gotta get going.
Ross: Well, I was gonna say sweet, but yeah-huh!
Ross: Well I I havent actually told her yet. I dont want to scare her off, yknow?
CHANDLER: [running out of his apartment after a girl] Ok, ok, you can be shirts and I'll be skins. I'll be skins. [sits down beside Rachel] Hey, how you holdin' up there, tiger? Oh, sorry, when my parents were getting divorced I got a lot of tigers. Got a lot of champs, chiefs, sports, I even got a governor.
Emily: I dont care! You just get him!
Chandler: All right fine! But Im only doing this for you!
Cecilia: All right Joey, I will help you. Not because I-I owe it to this stupid show, but because I owe it to Jessica.
Joey: Im gonna be an uncle! Come here! (He joins the hug.)
Chandler: Honey! Thats crazy! I dont want you to get me a stripper
Rachel: What, so I can't lokk nice? There might be doctors there.
Rachel: All right here he comes. Im gonna do this, Im gonna tell him, Im gonna be strong.
Monica: Please! I feel so bad! Just watch the hot woman get naked!
Joey: (on cell phone) Im sorry I gotta cancel tonight baby
Mr. Geller: Well, I used your boxes to divert water away from the Porsche.
Rachel: Im sorry daddy.
Rachel: Okay, okay, I checked. We have: Earl Grey, English Breakfast, Cinnamon Stick, Camomile, Mint Medley, Blackberry, and.. oh, wait, there's one more, um.. Lemon Soother. You're not the guy that asked for the tea, are you? (Guy shakes his head) Okay.
Rachel: I know. I know. I panicked, I panicked. I didnt want him to start yelling at me like I was some 74 Latour.
Monica: No, he's not. And if I can't get pregnant with you, then I don't want to get pregnant by... him or anyone else.
Dr. Green: I dont believe this!!
Ross: Oh I know, isn't it? Ooh... what'd you do to get her to laugh?
Monica: Yeah! I bet I can do it.
Rachel: Yes. Yes, he says Im damaged goods.
Ross: No, its not what I want either. I mean I-I cant force myself to fall in love with her again now.
Ross: Its Ben and his Da-Da. Da-Da? Can you say Da-Da? Yknow, you might as well say it because I told your
Stripper: Im waiting.
[Chandler makes a fake "I know I couldnt believe it either" gesture.]
Rachel: Well Umm, I got TiVo.
Rachel: Ewww. Yeah. Umm. I think Im gonna stay here.
Mona: Oh my God! Oh my God! Im so sorry!
Monica: Oh no, I already packed. The only thing I couldnt find though was your Speedo.
Mrs. Bing: Alright, well, be good, I love you. (Kisses him and goes to leave)
Ross: No! No sir umm, she means a lot to me. I mean, I careI-I love Rachel.
Ross: Im sorry. Dr. Green, Mona. Mona, Dr. Green.
Ross: (To Mona) But I didnt want to.
Ross: (to Mona) Oh but not that way. I mean I mean Im not in love with her. I love her like a, like a friend.
Rachel: Oh no, I know that. I know that. Although, we made a joke that we spend so much time together he should call me his work wife.
Chandler: I cant believe there is a naked hooker in there!
Hooker: Do you mind if I smoke in here?
Billy: Thomas, this is gonna be hard, but I wanted it to come from me, and nobody else.
Ross: I was going to tell you, but
Joey: Youre right. Maybe I shouldnt even go on the call back.
Joey: Pantyhose! Yknow? They way they start at your toe and go all the way up to here (He mimed that and stops when he realized he went to far.) I should go take these off shouldnt I?
Ross: No! No! No! No! No! I-I-I-II need to, I need to lie down.
Rachel: I cant. Im busy. Im apartment hunting.
Joey: I miss this.
Joey: I dont want to. You do it!
Joey: You shut up! (To Phoebe and Rachel) I love arguing with her. (To Erin) Ill be right back.
Joey: Are you kidding me? I never rent a movie without it! (Listens) Oh. (Listens) Uh, okay uh let me call you back. (Hangs up.)
Chandler: (angrily) Did she call? You-you told her I was sick right? Always tell her I am sick!
Kim: Hi Rachel. Ohh, Ive been meaning to ask you. Have you seen the new Ralph Lauren sheets? Ohh, what am I thinking. Of course you have.
Chandler: Well yknow, things are different. Im Im married now.
Hooker: Oh God! Listen, I am this close to robbing you guys. (Does the close sign.)
Rachel: Well yeah, but then I remembered I started it and there was this pep rally and I was, I was on top of the pyramid but anywayumm, what is this book about?
Monica: Wow! Look at this! (Picking up a shirt.) I cant believe I even fit into this shirt! (She holds it up and it reads: Tyrannosaurus Ross.) (She turns it around and looks at it.) Oh, this is yours. (Hands it to Ross.)
Monica: I can't believe he did this.
Rachel: Ross Im so sorry. Okay. I-I will promise I will straighten this out with him tomorrow in person, or via e-mail.
Ross: No! I talked to Joey on the set, he hasnt heard from him. I-I-I talked to Chandlers parents again!
Rachel: All right, I promise. Ill fix this. I swear. Ill-Ill-Ill-Ill talk to her.
Monica: (depressed) Thats right. Im no longer a bride. Ill never be a bride again. Now, Im just someones wife!
ROSS: Not at all! I love this guy. Hey, I was so psyched to hear you're back with my sister!
Ross: Should I leave this open for you too?
Phoebe: Ohh! All right! All right. Heres what well do, Ill get twice as drunk as Monica and then no ones will even notice her.
Mona: Im not sure yet. Why didnt you just tell me about all this?
Mona: Yknow, I-I-I just I dont want to get in the middle of something so complicated.
Mona: How can I be sure on that?
Chandler: I swallowed the sonic blaster gun.
Mona: Okay, I guess you can close the door now. (He does so and they kiss.)
Monica: Yknow what? Im gonna make this up to you. I promised you a stripper (turns on the radio), and youre gonna get a stripper. (She starts to strip.)
Monica: Ooh, these tennis shoes are so tight. I think Ill take them off. (Goes to do so.)
Phoebe: Ooh, if you take the northern route there's a man in Illinois with a beard of bees. {Okay, I must protest this, I've lived in Illinois all my life and know of no man with a beard of bees! Wisconsin, on the other hand, might be a different story.}
Joey: I didnt look at it. Stupid babys head was blocking most of it.
Ross: Oh, I am sorry, did you not like her, because I was hoping that we could come to one of your kissing parties onthe balcony.
Ross: Hey! Oh, Im so glad you guys are here. Ive been dying to tell someone what happened in the Paleontology department today.
Monica: All right okay, just so you know, Im not gonna make a turkey this year.
Joey: I just want you to say it once in a while.
3rd Customer: Actually I do have one small complaint.
Joey: No there wont! I promise I will finish that turkey!
Phoebe: Anything I can do to help?
Ross: Can I ask you something? Have you ever had a guy have a crush on you?
Rachel: Okay, fine. Gunther, y'know what, I am a terrible waitress, do you know why Im a terrible waitress? Because, I dont care. I dont care. I dont care which pot is regular and which pot is decaf, I dont care where the tray spot is, I just dont care, this is not what I want to do. So I dont think I should do it anymore. Im gonna give you my weeks notice.
Chandler: I have no idea.
Ross: (playing the drunk uncle) When Monica was a little girl, I remember that(Phoebe screams and tackles him)Ooh!! Ow! Very good!
Chandler: Yeah! Im just pretending to watch the game so I dont have to help out with stuff.
Chandler: Nope! Every once and a while I just scream stuff at the TV.
Monica: Oh, I didnt know you liked football.
Phoebe: I dont believe you! That is brilliant! And Monica has no idea?
Phoebe: Well I want to get in on this. Hey Mon? I dont think I can help you after all, I didnt realize this game was on.
Monica: Oh umm, I meant to tell you, Ross is coming.
Chandler: Im watching the game, but Im not deaf!
Will: Ross is coming. Great! I love Ross!
Monica: Isn't that sad? I mean, can you see how pathetic that is? You shouldn't be jealous. You should feel bad for him.
Ross: 'S'funny, um, uh, we agreed we'd spend the rest of our lives together. Things change, roll with the punches. I believe Julia's on the table..?
Rachel: I just purchased the La-Z-Boy E-cliner 3000. (Which is an actual product by the way, Im not sure about the 3000 part.)
Joey: Oh! Maybe its because Im on television. Im an actor on Days of Our Lives.
Rachel: Hi! Im Rachel Green.
Joey: (To Rachel) Its like me when I was born.
Phoebe: I think you do.