words in movies
Chandler: Yeah it is really pricey. I mean, I freaked when I first heard the numbers.
Chandler: It was pretty simple actually, I came up with a couple of cost-cutting solutions, wrote out a list and Monica told me to go to hell.
Mike: I heard that weddings are like a 40 billion dollar a year industry.
Mike: I think it would make me wanna marry you even more. (he kisses her)
Joey: Hey, maybe I should stop by! She could be a soap opera fan! It's very impressive when the little people know a celebrity.
Monica: Ok, so I think I'm just about done here, unless you have any bad stuff hidden somewhere, like... porn or cigarettes?
Chandler: (he stands up and he feels very offended) I don't, and I'm offended by the insinuation!
Joey: (going out with the VCR in his hand) Well, I guess we'll never know whose it is!
Charity guy: May I help you?
Phoebe: Well, I think you're gonna appreciate it the crap out of this one (she gives him a check)
Phoebe: Sure, I so glad we did this. It feels so good!
Charity guy: Oh, actually, that's the shirt I wore to the gym.
Rachel: Oh hey Ross... Listen, I heard about you and Charlie. I'm really sorry.
Ross: Well, I was thinking of taking Emma to the playground!
Ross: Like I said I was thinking of taking Emma to the museum of knives and fire!
Rachel: Ok, look, Ross. I do not want Emma going to the playground.
Rachel: (upset) All right, well, if you must know... I had a traumatic... swing incident... when I was little.
Rachel: Yes, I was 4 years old and I was on the swing and then all of a sudden my hair got tangled in the chain. And to get me out my mom had to-had to cut a big chunk of my hair! (crying) And it was uneven for weeks!
Ross: (sarcastic) And you made it through that? I wonder who's gonna play you in the movie!
Rachel: Ok, fine! You can make fun of me. I do not want Emma going there. And I was thinking Claire Danes.
Ross: Space is filled with orbiting children. (pause) Look, please, just come on, you know, when you’ll see the look on Emma’s face, I swear you won’t regret it.
Rachel: Irrational, huh? All right, well, I’ll remember that the next time you freak out about a spider in your apartment!
Ross: Oh, yeah, that’s the same, I am sure there are thirty different species of poisonous swings!
Monica: We’re waiting for the adoption lady, but, hey, I’m glad you’re here. I was cleaning this morning and I found this (she puts a box on the table and opens it). I don’t know if you wanna use it, but…
Phoebe: Awe, this is so sweet of you! But you know what? I won’t be needing a veil, I actually won’t be wearing a dress at all!
Monica: I told you! I am not coming to a naked wedding!
Monica: That’s crazy! (Phoebe looks bewildered). I am sorry. I just can’t imagine giving up my one wedding day like that!
Phoebe: We, you know, we’re different! We don’t care about having a huge party. (She picks up the veil) This is really nice for you, but, oh, please, I put this on? (she puts it on) And, ow, I look (she looks her reflex image on a toaster), why, well, radiant. (pause) All right, well, who cares, I don’t need a pretty veil and a fancy dress.
Monica: Ow! (Chandler slaps her on her back) Oh, that sounds nice! I am just there for jury duty. They really spruce that place up!
Phoebe: It’s ok, it’s ok. I made my decision. What I really want is a great big wedding (she covers her mouth)
Phoebe: Well, I’ll just ask for it back!
Chandler: I don’t think you can do that!
Rachel: I know (she touches Emma’s head) but they’re just so beautiful! Oh, my God, I just pulled one out.
Ross: I promise you she’s safe! No watch how much she loves this.
Ross: See, I told you!
Rachel: Awe! (Emma laughs) Oh my God! Looks, she’s a little dare-devil! Oh, let me push, can I push?
Ross: Ok! (he takes the camera and walks backwards to take a shot) See? Scared of swings, I bet you feel pretty silly (a swinging boy knocks him down) Ow!
Charity guy: Wow! Are you here to make another donation the same day? I don’t think that that’s ever happened before.
Mike (to the charity guy): Oh my God, I love your shirt!
Phoebe: I am sorry. I am, but this wedding is just really important to me.
Phoebe: Hey, that’s not fair! A person’s wedding is important! And especially to me! Ok? I didn’t have a graduation party! And I didn’t go to Prom. And I spent my sweet sixteen being chased round a tire yard by an escaped mental patient who is his own words wanted to “kill me” or whatever. So I deserve a real celebration and I am not gonna let some sweaty little man make me feel badly about it.( She storms out)
Laura: Hi, I am Laura, I am here for your adoption interview.
Monica: Hi, I am Monica and this is Chandler. Please come in.
Monica: Ok. Great. I am so glad that you are here. We’re really excited about getting this process started.
Laura: You know, I... I feel like I've been here before. Are any other couples in the building adopting?
Laura: I just realized why I remember this place.
Laura: Oh, it's nothing. I went on a date with a guy who lived in this building and it didn't end very well.
Laura: Well, I'm sorry I brought it up. So, are either one of you planning on staying at home with your child... (someone knocks on the door)
Ross: SON OF A BITCH! (turns to his right to see three kids staring at him) (To the kids) Oh relax! I didn't say the 'F' word! (They go away)
Rachel: Ross, see! I told you, those swings are evil! Alright, that is it. That is the last time Emma is getting on one of those things for her entire life.
Ross: No wait, okay, okay, I have an idea. I want you to get on the swing, okay? And you'll see that there's nothing to be afraid of.
Rachel: (looks at him suspiciously) I know what this is all about... You've always been jealous of my hair.
Ross: Look, I just think you're an adult, okay? And you should get over your silly fears.
Ross: I know. (Rachel bends down to Emma and Ross looks over his shoulder again, afraid)
Chandler: Oh, just like I said. That crazy... Bert... roaming the halls. (Joey bangs on the door again)
Mike: Well, hey, at least you're getting a proper wedding. I mean, you really deserve that.
Phoebe: Yeah, I really do. You know, I had nothing growing up. (thinks for a few seconds) Just like the kids I took the money from.
Mike: No! No, no. I see where this is going. Don't make me go back there.
Phoebe: Look, I can't have a wedding with this money now. It's tainted.
Laura: Well, I must say, this seems like a lovely environment to raise a child in.
Laura: Oh! Well, actually, before we look around, let me make sure I have everything I need up to here...
Monica: (Pulls Laura into the spare room) Why don't I show you the baby's room?
Joey: Well, you wouldn't let me in, so I thought you were in trouble.
Monica: (laughs nervously as well, Laura looks confused) (To Laura) Some people don't get him, but I think he's really funny! (She takes Laura to their own bedroom).
Joey: (quivering with anger) I did not care for that!
Joey: I forgot my bat.
Chandler: I can explain... Joey...
Joey: Uhm... ok... uhm... Well, yeah... You have got some nerve, coming back here. I can't believe you never called me.
Joey: Oh... yeah... Probably you don't even remember my name. It's Joey, by the way. And don't bother telling me yours, because I totally remember it... lady. Yeah! I waited weeks for you to call me.
Laura: I gave you my number, you never called me.
Laura: (embarrassed towards Chandler and Monica) Well, I'm pretty sure I gave you my number.
Joey: Really? Think about it. Come on! You're a beautiful woman, smart, funny, we had a really good time, huh? If I had your number, why wouldn't I call you?
Laura: I don't know... Well, maybe I'm wrong... I'm sorry...
Joey: No, no, hey, no! Too late for apologies... ok? You broke my heart. You know how many women I had to sleep with to get over you? (and he leaves the apartment, leaving her shocked)
Joey: (acting sad) NO! I waited a long time, I can't wait anymore... (and closes the door behind him)
Laura: Boy, you people are nice... And I've got to say... I think you're going to make excellent parents.
Charity guy: Are you here to take more money? Because, I think what you're looking for is an ATM.
Charity guy: If I haven't said so already sir, (sarcastically pointing to Phoebe) congratulations!
Charity guy: On behalf of the Children of New York, I reject your money.
Mike: Well, I mean... It sounds good to me. And that way we can save up, come back in a few years and make an even bigger donation.
Monica: Hello...? Oh hi... Oh my God...! Really...? I can't wait to tell Chandler... Ok, goodbye. (hangs up)
Rachel: Ok... I got a spider. There were two, I picked the bigger one.
Rachel: A-alright! I can do this.
Ross: There you go! Good for you! And you know what, I'm actually getting used to this little guy. I don't really even feel him in here anymore.
Ross: I justI-I cant believe shes-shes dating?!
Ross: (surprised) Huh, I took a shot there.
Mr Zelner: But I'm sorry. There's nothing I can do... Ah, it's not true, there is... nothing I want to do.
Monica: Alright, we don't know that it's him. I mean, it could be the football guy.
Rachel: Ohh! Lucky me! Oh my God! That is good news, Ross! I think that's the best news I've heard since Le Poo died!
Mr Zelner: Well, I guess having Rachel back wouldn’t be the worst thing in the world.
Joey: I love that saying!
Phoebe: I’m guessing she does.
Joey: I’m just mad at my agent.
Ross: Yeah! Yes! Thank you! This is great. Thank you so much. And I swear, your kid is going to have the time of his life.
Joey: I’m saying that… (pause). This isn't working for me anymore, ok? Estelle, you’re fired. Goodbye. (he hangs up the phone).
Monica: Oh, you know, my flock is good, I mean, yeah, my flock pretty much takes care of themselves at this point. Good flock. Flock, flock, flock.
Joey: Yeah, actually I am!
Joey: I was just gonna call you! That’s weird.
Joey: No way! Kay look, if I have to go to the doctor for anything its gonna be for this thing sticking out of my stomach! (Rolls over and shows Chandler.)
Rachel: No, I’m still going.
Ross: Rach, thanks but uh, I don't need you doing me any favors.
Chandler: No-no all kids are embarrassed by their parents, youd have to come up with a whole new word for what I went through. When I was in High School, he used to come to all of my swim meets dressed as a different Hollywood starlet. Yknow its hard enough to be fourteen. Youre skinny. Youre wearing speedoesThat your mom promised that you would grow into! And you look up into the stands and theres your dad cheering you on dressed as Carmen Miranda. We was wearing a headdress with real fruit that he will later hand out to your friends as a healthy snack!
Chandler: Huh! So that's what I would look like if I worked out... and was being serviced by a policeman. You're not actually going to send these out are ya?
Erica: You're kidding me? I mean, it's enough that you are a doctor. But on top of it, you're married to a reverend?
Lady: Oh, sure. I’m showing it to someone else right now, but please, look around.
Chandler: No, no, Ross and Rachel will be back soon and then I gotta go to the office (Pulls another balloon out of his mouth) Am I producing them?
Emily: She said, "If Im not gonna be happy getting married somewhere that we find in a day, well then we should just postpone it."
Monica: (looks confused and scared) I don't know why.
Phoebe: Yes. Yes. Yes. I cant believe it! The baby wants bologna! Maybe he wants me to eat meat? I cant eat meat!
Rachel: I know, I know, and you were right Ross. (To Amy) You are soo irresponsible I am never letting you baby-sit ever again!
Chandler: Well he doesnt have to know! Its not like we run in the same circles. I hang out with you guys, and he stars in a drag show in Vegas.
Ross: Okay, and oh Im gonna need a bunch of extra keys. Apparently I give them away for no reason at all.
Chandler: Good, good. Listen, heh, I dunno what Shelley told you about me, but, uh... I'm not.
Rachel: (she enters wearing a bath-robe) Hey... Hi you guys! Listen, you know what? I'm not feeling really well. I think I can't get out for the play.
Chandler: Yknow what? I dont trust you with this cake anymore! And I got it first, and Im takin it back! (Grabs the cheesecake and heads for his apartment.)
Ross: (to the guys) I gotta go make a fake Ben.
Joey: Hey, hey, hey, hey. Look. I take a girl out, she can order whatever she wants! The more, the better! All right? Just don’t order a Garden salad and then eat my food! That’s a good way to lose some fingers!
Chandler: I never stopped loving you.
Joey: Can I ask you something? Uhm, what's it like there?
Phoebe: Well, I didn't think I should just drop by...
Janice: All right, I got to run. Tell Monica I say goodbye. And... I'll see you later, neighbor. (Janice laugh)
Chandler: And yet I never run into Beyonce!
Phoebe: (Under her breath) God, I woke the beast. Sorry. (To Monica) I was wrong obviously, I justI misspoke. It's okay.
Chandler: I understand.
Janice: I don't know what to say... I mean, you know, obviously we have this... heat between us.
Rachel: Well, I took it.
Monica: This is not, what I�m wearing. I�m ovulating and Chandler�s gonna be home any minute, so I thought we would try before dinner.
Joey: You know what? You are my friends, I wanna be supportive, I will come with you. SHOTGUN!
Ross: Uhm, I hadn't no you... I had no idea you were so excited about Paris. Uhm, I mean, you said you were scared.
Ross: I really do.
Phoebe: Wrong again! Apparently you can change it to anything you want. So I thought, all right, here's an opportunity to be creative. So meet Princess Consuela Banana Hammock.
Phoebe: Oh, she's that work of art I made, you know, with the woman coming out of the frame.
Joanna: Oh, I know and hes soo sweet! Listen, he said he was going to call, so put him straight through.
Joey: All right, all right, all right, let's play one more time, ok? And remember, if I win you do not move to Paris.
Dr. Long: Ill be back in an hour to check you again.
Rachel: Well uh, his answering machine was very understanding. Ugh. I feel blue.
Rachel: Im not asking you to go on a date with him!
Joey: Hey bear, I need some career advice.
Monica: Oh my God! I have nothing left to teach you! (they hug)
Monica: Oh, yeah, right! And after I took a shower this morning I just threw my towel on the floor! Oh God, it hurts to even joke about it.
Rachel: Shoot. Oh, I can't believe I did this!
Phoebe: Okay, this is going to be harder than I thought. Umm, lets try some uh, aversion therapy.
Amy: Since today... I am going to be a baby stylist.
Erica: I know.
Ross: Right, no, I understand.
Rachel: I think, if it was a little colder in here I could see your nipples through that sweater.
Ross: No, no, I knew (he stares at her breasts).
Chandler: If I untangle you, will you please get rid of the corn rose?
Monica: Oh, I know. I know. Hey, you know, you can take it if you want! The lease is still in Nana's name.
Joey: Try it, I can't feel a thing! (Ross starts punching him too)
Mrs. Geller: Chandler! Youve been Rosss best friend all these years, stuck by him during the drug problems. (Ross gets disgusted.) And now youve taken on Monica as well. Well, I dont know what to say. Youre a wonderful human being.
Rachel: You know what? I don't want to be with them either, but it's Thanksgiving and we should not want to be together, together. (Goes to unlock the door)
Chandler: I didn't know Monica had these!
David: Allright... But... if I ever do come back from Minsk... (points at Mike) well, you just better watch out.
Joey: What did I just say?
Ross: (panting)They're towing a car. And I am seeing...spots.
Joey: I forgot to pick up my dry cleaning!
Phoebe: I know.
Hoshi: You are iron. You are steel! Let me ask you something, how come when I call your computer support line, I have to wait an hour and a half?
Joey: Huh, if I had to guess I'd say Rachel is putting on the bubble wrap and Phoebe is doing the punching.
Rachel: Oh, Pheebs, I don't even know where to start.
JOEY: Wow!� That didn't take long.� I thought you said Tulsa was, like a three hour flight.
Rachel: I love you Phoebe.
Joey: That's true. But you know what, it doesn't matter because I already know who you're gonna go home with tonight.
Monica: I know what you mean. You're like a sister to me too.
Monica: (having the same problem) You're the best friend I ever had.
Joey: I really made you think about that thing uh?
Chandler: I think these are yours.
Rachel: (to Chandler) Can I talk to you alone for a minute?
Ross: I don't think so.
Chandler: You know me sir. Oh ah, I do have a question for ya. Do you know how I get around the office computer network so I can access the really good Internet porn?
Chandler: Let me just say something... Because once we get into this, I'm gonna get all uncomfortable and probably make some stupid joke... I just want to say that I... I love you... And, I'm gonna miss you. And I'm so sad that you're leaving.
Joey: Yeah, I guess, but whats like heads and whats tails?
Rachel: I think I'm gonna take off. (pats Ross on his back, but he looks very surprised)
Monica: (to Ross) So, I guess you're next. You're ready?
Phoebe: Ok, I'll fight for her. Ok! Oh, wait, oh I just realized... if I do that, that means you don't get her.
Rachel: Oh, you guys. This was an amazing night. Thank you so much. I love you. Good night.
Ross: No, I don't think so.
Chandler: Look, I appreciate it, but uh, its a little creepy. Yknow? Im not a bachelor anymore.
Ross: What? I don't get a goodbye?
Ross: THE HELL I DO!
Ross: I don't get a goodbye?
Monica: I hope Ross isn't too upset.
Joey: I'm sure he's not more bummed out than I am.