words in movies
Joey: Okay, really good. Anyway I gotta go; Im late for work.
Joey: YeahHey, dont worry, shes a terrific girl. And hey listen, could you do me a favor? When she comes out could you just mention that Im not looking for a serious relationship; thatd be great.
Joey: Just casually slip it in, yknow lay the groundwork. Tell her uh, Im a lonerNo! An outlaw! Tell her she doesnt want to get mixed up with the likes of me.
Rachel: Yknow what? Thats a lot to remember, cant I just tell her youre a pig?
Joey: Hey, Im gonna call her later! Honest! Oh come on, Chandler used to do it! Hed even make the girl pancakes! Plus, hed make extras and leave em for me.
Rachel: Well forget it, Im not telling that girl anything. That is not my responsibility.
Joeys Date: Sorry about that, but I couldnt get that lock to work on the door.
Rachel: Yeah, Joey kinda disabled it when I moved in.
Joeys Date: You must be Rachel, Im Erin.
Erin: Hi. I dont mean this to sound like high school, but did he say anything about me?
Ross: Okay, okay, I was typing names into the library computer earlier, yknow-yknow for fun, and I typed mine in and guess what came up? My doctoral dissertation! Its here! Yeah, its right-its right down here! In the biggest library in the university! (They start heading that way, towards a secluded section behind the racks.)
(They go around the last row of bookshelves and find a couple doing what college coeds do in secluded corners of university libraries. For those of you who dont know what Im talking about, lets just say that clothing is undone. Ross gasps and the couple gets up and runs away.)
Female Student: (as they are moving past Ross) Im so sorry!
Monica: Well fine! I want to meet this chicken expert! Send the Colonel in!
Monica: Im fine.
Janice: (notices Monicas engagement ring) Ohh! What is that on your finger?! Im blind!
Chandler: OH MY GAWD! I am so sorry sweetie, are you okay? You didnt tell her we were getting married, did you?
Monica: Well, she was shocked when I told her, but then again so were most people.
Monica: Well, she corned me! She asked if the wedding was in town! I mean, what was I supposed to do?!
Chandler: Lie!!! How hard is that?! The checks in the mail! Oh your baby is so cute! I cant wait to read your book Ross!!
Monica: Come on! So she comes to the wedding! I mean it wont be so bad.
Erin: Ohh, listen. Ive got to get going. Today was great, thanks!
Rachel: I know!
Joey: Yeah. Ill uh, Ill call ya.
Rachel: Oh and Ill call ya too!
Erin: Or Ill call you!
Rachel: Oh Joey, Im sorry I just couldnt tell her all those things you wanted me to tell her. And yknow we got to talking and I
Rachel: Look Joey, come on shes so perfect for you! I mean shes sweet, she-she likes baseball, and she-she had two beers at lunch.
Joey: My beers?! Look you guys, shes a very nice girl. Okay? We had a good time, but I justI dont see it going anywhere.
Joey: Look Im sorry you guys, I-I just dont think so.
Rachel: Im sorry?
Ross: My doctoral dissertation is in the library at school, I went to see it, and there were students makin babies right in the middle of the Paleontology section!
Ross: Great! Because people kept showing up, I think its like uh-a thing!
Joey: I like to see the previews. (Rachel looks at him.) The candy.
Ross: Excuse me. Hi, Im a professor here. Do you know the Paleontology section, fifth floor, stack 437?
The Librarian: Well, yes! Just give me five minutes, I just have to find someone to cover my shift.
Ross: No! No!! No! Can I speak to someone in charge please?! (The librarian brings his boss over.)
The Head Librarian: How can I help you?
Ross: Hi, I was wondering if it is possible to increase security in the Paleontology section? See I-I wrote a book up there and instead of reading it people are-are-are well, rolling around in front of it.
The Head Librarian: We are aware of the problem you are referring too. (He turns to look at the previous librarian.) But as far as increasing security, Im afraid the library is very understaffed. I, I cant help you.
Ross: Well, fine. Fine! If-if Im the only person with any appreciation of the sanctity of the written word, Ill go up there and defend it myself! (Starts to do so, but stops and to the previous librarian) And dont you follow me!
Rachel: (gasps) Oh my God! Listen to you talkin about having kids. Oh my Joey. (She goes over and hugs him.) Oh, please dont get married before I do.
Janice: Oh. Oh I just cannot believe Clark stood me up!
Janice: I should just go on to happier things, okay? Umm, why dont you tell about your lovely wedding?
Janice: Oh wait you two think of me as family?! Oh, I have to ask you something now and be honest; do you want me to sing Careless Whisper or Lady In Red?
Joey: You shut up! (To Phoebe and Rachel) I love arguing with her. (To Erin) Ill be right back.
Rachel: Okay? Wait okay, tell-tell me that you like him, please? I mean tell me that you like him.
Erin: Look, hes a really great guy and I know that you really want this to work out, but I just dont see this having a future.
Rachel: But you said that you liked him! I mean what happened?! Did ya just change your mind?!
Erin: Im sorry I Its just theres no real spark.
Erin: I really dont think he does. And yknow what? Maybe you guys could help clue him in. Yknow, tell him Im-Im not interested in a serious relationship or something.
Phoebe: Yeah, and maybe that youre a real (She says something in Italian, and it doesnt matter what she said. Its not important so I dont need everyone who speaks Italian telling me what she said.)
Erin: Im sorry?
Phoebe: Oh well, I guess Italian isnt one of the four languages you speak.
Rachel: Wow. Well, I guess it was Cupid who brought her here.
Ross: Yes? Yes?! How can I help you?
Woman: Uh, actually I find Marions views far to progressionist.
Ross: I find Marions views far to progressionist.
Woman: Im sorry, who are you?
Ross: Im a professor here uh, Ross Geller.
Woman: Ross Geller, why do I know that name? Its uhWait! (Grabs his book off of the shelf.) Did you write this?
Woman: Yknow, you look nothing like I wouldve thought. Youre youre so young.
Ross: Well I uh, I skipped forth grade.
Ross: I am very very sorry.
Joey: Oh, it was great! I mean we walked all around the village. We went to this ice cream place, split a milkshake, 70/30 but still And guess what, Im thinking about taking her upstate to one of those bed and breakfasts.
Rachel: Jo-Joey, look honey we-we need to talk okay? Umm, I kinda got the feeling from her today that uh, shes not lookin for a serious relationship.
Joey: No hey Rach, its cool okay? Yknow Im a loner too! (Heads for his room.) Right?
Rachel: Yeah and honey I promise next time that I will just say good-bye and tell em youre not looking for a relationship.
Chandler: I say we go with Careless Whisper.
Janice: Well umm, I thought I was going to go back to my apartment but then I just felt I couldnt really be alone tonight. (Joey walks into view of the open door behind Janice, sees her, gets a terrified look on his face, and flees in horror.) I was wondering if I could maybe stay here with you, just I really feel that I need to be with family.
Janice: Please, its because otherwise I really dont know what I might do.
Monica: I never stop thinking about it.
Janice: Hey you guys, umm do either one of you want to get in there before I take my bath.
Chandler: Janice, Im sorry but umm, you cant stay here tonight.
Chandler: Honestly? Our apartment is a hotbed for electromagnetic activity. Now Monica and I have been immunized, but sadly you have not.
Janice: Okay, Im going to need a comforter, but did you have a hypoallergenic one because otherwise I get very nasal. (Makes some weird sound) Do you have a cat? Cause its already happening. (Makes a nasal sound) Do you hear that? (She keeps making the nasal sound.)
Monica: I mean, I realize that his feelings may never completely go away, but you can.
Janice: Oh my Gawd, I-I understand. I-I am so sorry, Ill go. (Starts for the door.) Good-bye Monica (hugs her), I wish you a lifetime of happiness with him. Chandler, (hugs him) you call me when this goes in the pooper. (Hurries out.)
Ross: (to the guard) Dont sweat it, Ive got this section covered. Yeah, in fact Ive got this little baby (Turns on a mini-flashlight) to shine in peoples eye(The guard walks away)Okay, see you later.
Chandler: I just wanted to show Monica your book. (Ross just glares at him.)
Phoebe: Well, I think I broke it. But thats all right, heres the number you can call.
Chandler: That's not true. I came with Monica and I'm leaving with Weird Al.
Monica: I think I hear curtains closing...
Mona: Oh no-no, I-I had my eyes closed so I could concentrate and yknow take it all in.
Monica: (as Rachel) Remember back in freshman year? (Talking fast before Rachel can catch her) Well, Billy Dreskin and I had sex on your bed.
Joey: I was tryin to make a sale!! Oh, man, if I ever run into that guy again, do you know what Im gonna do?
Charlie: I uhm... I completely understand.
Ross: Yeah, It's just... I don't think I can do this...
Rachel: Why hasnt he called Rachel? Why? Why? I dont understand. Why? He said hell call. Why? Why? Chandler Im telling you she has flipped out, shes gone crazy!
Phoebe: I think David would probably wanna hear a few lectures.
Chandler: I had the exact same conversation.
Mike: Oh, that's ok. I don't care which of them I beat.
Rachel: ...I really don't... (looks around again)
Ross: Can I talk to you for a minute?
DIRECTOR'S ASSISTANT: I have nothing to do with casting.
Rachel: Joey, you cant let him get away with that. Ya know what, Im not going to let him get away with that. Im going to say something to himNo, I really shouldnt say anythingNo, I should say something to him. (Goes to the counter) Gunther, I want you to give Joey his job back. That is really not fair that you have to fire him
Ross: And you know I wanted to ask Charlie out since the day I met her.
Joey: Yeah, I think that'd be best... So, so I'm gonna... I'm gonna take off...
Joey: Probably, yeah... I mean, maybe we should... hold off until we talk to Ross.
Rachel: I mean, you know... Ross and I haven't dated in like... six years...
Rachel: Sorry, I just uhm... I can't seem to get Ross out of my head...
Ross: Uh, actually I think she went to the salon.
Ross: Uh, no... no. I couldn't find him. I'm just gonna talk to him on the plane.
Ross: I thought so.
Joey: I understand...
Joey: I mean what kind of an actor, what kind of an actor cant even say, "Hmm, noodle soup?"
Phoebe: No, I think I can come over. It's Saturday, right?
Ross: Oh, I uh, I mean, I... dude, I spent the whole conference with Charlie.
Mike: I have a date.
Mike: Uhm... I can't do anything tonight.
Mike: Yeah... Well, when... you and I broke up I started seeing someone.
Joey: I guess so. I'm just... really nervous.
Joey: Absolutely. But, were gonna stop by the hospital just to be sure, okay? Ill page Ross on the way. Come on.
Phoebe: No, you cant let this stop you from getting massages! No look, I have, I have lots of clients that make the same noises you do!
Janice: Uh-oh, I feel another one coming. (She makes a sound like a goose during the contraction.)
Joey: I saw you.
Joey: It's okay. You know, I totally understand, alright? You guys, make way more sense than her and I ever did, you know. And... I want you to be happy.
Ross: So, I uhm... kinda need to talk to you about Charlie.
Joey: Oh, you have no idea. And-and when were on stage I get to-to kiss her and-and touch her, but then she goes home with the director, and its like somebodys ripping out my heart!
Joey: Yeah... Now I have something...
Joey: I am those things, yeah.
Joey: I can't think of anything.
Isabella: ...because I have a list of five goofy coffee house guys and yesterday I bumped you for that guy over there. (points at a guy and leaves)
Ross: Are you kidding? I have had some very dirty dreams about this...
Rachel: Ah... Well, obviously I think so too.
Dr. Long: Actually, theyre things you can do. Just some home remedies, but in my experience Ive found that some of them are quite effective.
Joey: Thank you. Yeah, I appreciate that.
Joey: (sees Rachel) Oh, uh, hey Rach. I uh, I was just coming over here to uh Oh wait, I dont have to lie to you, you dont live here anymore. Uh, Im eating their food. What are you doing?
Phoebe: Well alright, looks like you guys have got it under control so Im just gonna go. (She gets up and Rachel looks at her, upset, and Monica just stares.) No! Really? Misery really does love company. All right! (She sits back down.)
Phoebe: (stunned) I... I'm Phoebe.
Mike: Anyway, I just wanna give you a heads up.
Chandler: Well yeah! But now that I know that youre having these thoughts, Im back to panic, anxiety, and uh Im definitely gonna need some kind of sports drink.
Ross: Are you kidding? Okay, look. I-I studied evolution. Remember, evolution? Monkey into man? Plus, Im a doctor, and I had a monkey. Im Doctor Monkey!
Phoebe Sr: Oh no, I-Im sorry, I guess we lost track of everybody after high school.
Rachel: Aaah... Ross, actually there's something that I really need to talk to you about.
Ross: Ooh hey, Emma, daddy has some presents for you okay? Okay? I want you to wait right here. Come here sweetie.
Kori: You sick freak, who does that? I can't believe I had a crush on you! (she leaves and slams the door behind her)
MR. GELLER: Honey. Honey, have you seen my Harmon Kilerbrew bat? Bob doesn't believe I have one.
Phoebe: Alright... Susie, can I call you Susie?
Phoebe: Well, I don't...
Conan: Its a tradition here on Friends after every taping for me to hang out with you guys, (They all laugh) talk down the episode umm The point of this whole thing is what people see in America is: they see Friends, they love the show, it looks like a smooth running machine, but behind the scenes theres deceit, mistrust, and hate. And I thought, I thought wed actually take a look at uh, yknow some of these moments where you guys arethere are mistakes. You make mistakes.
Precious: I just can't believe this... Why?
Precious: Oh, why would he do this? I mean, what's wrong with me?
Precious: I mean, what the hell am I supposed to do now?
Precious: I just can't believe that Mike didn't give me any warning.
Phoebe: (sarcastically) Uhuh... Yeah...!, you know. And given my life long search for irony, you can imagine how happy I am.
Monica: I have a problem.
[Scene: A blackjack table, Joey is moving in to try and get his hand twin (who's dealing) to join him in his evil plot to rule the world! "Join me, and together we'll rule the universe as father and son!" (Sorry, I had a little Star Wars creep in thereOoh, I have a big spoiler for The Phantom Menace, Yoda lives at the end! Ha-ha, spoiled it! Now you don't have to see it!)]
Monica: Good! Now I need you to be careful and efficient. And remember, if I am harsh with you, it is only because you are doing it wrong.
Ross: Come on, come on. Damnit, damnit, damnit, damnit. (to Susan) This is all your fault. This is supposed to be, like, the greatest day of my life, y'know? My son is being born, and I should be in there, you know, instead of stuck in a closet with you.
Monica: (looking disappointed) I guess so...
Rachel: No! Of course we can wait. Alright, so I guess that means good night then?
Chandler: I think you know.
Chandler: This is what I want to do.
Monica: Really? I don't really feel like it.
Mrs. Bing: Oh honey! This is so exciting! I thought we screwed you up so bad this day would never come. Oh and just think. Soon therell be lots of little Bings. (He freaks out and loosens the tie again.)
Joey: Okay fine! Im a seven! All right, I have surprisingly small feet. But the rest of me is good, Ill show ya!
Eric: Just seeing her brought it all back. All the lies, the way she used me. I just I got so angry just looking at her (Looks at Phoebe) face.
Monica: Okay, I just don't get why you like it so much.
Phoebe: Oh, wait a minute its not gonna be Baby Girl? I thought that was so original!
Joey: Okay, Ross, I realise that you didn't expect to walk in and see that, but.. Let me explain, okay?
Rachel: No, but you know what I mean.
Rachel: I dont know, yknow? I feel a little umm No, yknow what? Nevermind, Im gonna be fine.
Chandler: No, its not! When I looked at the other ring I could see Monicas face when I gave it to her, yknow? And I could see her saying yes. When I look at this ring, all I see is a ring! Unless I look at it really closely and then I can see my own eye. (Does so and laughs.) Look, this is the most important thing Im gonna do in my life. I wanna make sure its perfect.
Joey: I do like fajitas.
Monica: I don't know!
Chandler: (breaking up) Well, it just hurts so bad. I uh
Rachel: So, Im in my apartment doing the Soap Opera Digest crossword puzzle, and guess who the clue is for three down. (She hands the magazine to Joey.)
Joey: (entering) Hey! Hey Chandler look, I know youre mad, but I just want to say Im sorry. I-I was a total jerk. Completely o-over the line. Uh, I just I hate pulp! Yknow? I mean, yknow how Monica feels about low fat mayonnaise?
Phoebe: No, I'm just gonna help him, you know, get 'de-Ursula-ized', like you know, like I did for Joey after he went out with her.
Joey: Yeah, I didn't throw any of that out..
Phoebe: Really? Theres nothing sexual about this? (Sexily) Oooh. Oo God! Ohh. Ohhhh. Ohh. (Some cute guy is watching closely.) (To him) What are you looking at?! (Pause) I mean hi.
Ross: What? Fine? Because I am! Aren't you? Aren't you? Aren't you? You see? Who else is fine?
Frank Jr.: I haven't slept in four years!
Phoebe: Yeah, I know, Frank. I counted them when they were coming out of my area.
Frank Jr.: No, I can't.
Joey: Ok! All right, well... I'm gonna see if I can get a room for the night and I'll... I'll see you later!
Frank Jr.: Sometimes I think that.. Oh, no, no, no, I can't say it, it's too horrible. No.
Ross: The ride broke down. So, Carol and I went behind a couple of those mechanical Dutch children... then they fixed the ride, and we were asked never to return to the Magic Kingdom.
Frank Jr.: Oh, no! I would never do that. No. I just was thinking that, you know, maybe you could take one.