words in movies
Monica: No, I think we should save our china for something really special. Like if the Queen of England comes over.
Chandler: I will explain it to her.
Joey: Yeah! I totally forgot I'm supposed to be there. I can't believe I forgot. I usually write stuff like this on my arm.
Joey: I guess I'm going to have to come up with a really good reason why I wasn't there. The producers are going to be so mad at me. They sat us all down yesterday and said "Everyone has to be there at 6:00 AM sharp, that means you Tribbiani." Like.. like I was some kind of idiot.
Rachel: I haven't seen you in like.. a year.
Amy: Oh, I know, I know. I've just been crazed.
Rachel: Oh well yeah me too. Um.. I had a baby.
Amy: I decorated Dad's office.
Amy: Listen, um about the hair straightener, honey.. I really need one. I'm going to have dinner at my boyfriend's house.
Monica: I know, after you left the store, I chose different ones.
Joey: I.. I.. I need a good lie.
Joey: No, no, no I need a good lie to explain why I wasn't at a work thing today.
Joey: I do not.
Phoebe: Oh really. Okay. let me ask you something. Yesterday at the coffee house, I went to the bathroom and when I came back, my muffin was gone-who took it?
Joey: Somebody opened the door to the coffee house and a raccoon came running in, went straight for your muffin and I said "Hey don't eat that-that's Phoebe's" and he said.. <pause> He said.. "Joey you stink at lying." What am I going to do?
Rachel: Amy! <pause> Yes I do.. I really do. <grabs Ross' hand for support>
Amy: Hello? Yeah, um. Hang on one sec. <to Ross and Rachel> Can I take this upstairs?
Amy: Seriously? Its.. its just these rooms? <moves hands around motioning 'just these rooms'> <To Ross> I thought you were a doctor.
Ross: I know, I mean a PhD is just as good as an MD.
Rachel: Oh sure Ross, yeah. If I have a heart attack in a restaurant, I want you there with your fossil brush.
Amy: My boyfriend canceled on me. I mean.. I I finally find a real relationship. I mean, someone that I can spend this day with and then his wife comes back into town. I swear, its almost not worth dating married guys.
Amy: Oh. I was so looking forward to this. It was going to be such a beautiful Thanksgiving. We were going to have sushi.
Rachel: Oh Amy, don't cry Amy. Um.. Ross, could I talk to you in private?
Rachel: Um look I was thinking.. If its ok with Monica I would like to invite Amy to Thanksgiving.
Ross: You know, I think thats a great idea. It'll be like the pilgrims bringing the Indians syphilis.
Rachel: Look I know she's a little tough to take. She has no where else to go, and she's my sister. Alright, she's Emma's aunt. And I would like them to bond.
Ross: Ok, fine, but I don't want them bonding to much. I don't want her telling Emma she needs a nose job.
Amy with confused look on face: Yeah I.. I think so. <sticks her hand out to shake hands with Phoebe and says to her> It's nice to meet you Emma.
Joey: Pheebs, I still need some help here
Joey: Oh.. I don't know why this is so hard for me. you know.. I mean lying is basically just acting and I am a terrfic actor.
Amy: Oh I was just thinking. You know what would be incredible? If you guys died.
Amy: no, no, then I would get the baby. I mean you know it would be just like a movie. Like at first I wouldn't know what to do with her, then I would rise to the occasion and and then I would get a makeover and then I'd get married.
Amy: Now listen, not that you guys could stop me or anything cause you know you'd be dead. I was thinking about changing her name. I'm just not really a big fan of Emily. [Transcriber note: I'm surprised that Rachel and Ross didn't say they weren't either here]
Rachel: Honey, I don't know how to tell you this, but um, if something were to happen to Ross or to myself <Ross and Rachel knock on wood> um you wouldn't get the baby.
Chandler: I can't believe you'd want us to raise Emma.
Amy: I don't believe this, hold on a second. You guys die and I don't get your baby?
Amy: Connected? I mean.. to what? She's.. she's a lump.
Chandler: You know, guys I got to say. This means so much to me. That you would trust me with your child. I mean, we all know that Monica and I have been trying to have a baby of our own. You know I've had my doubts about my skills as a father, but that you two.. that you two.... <starts to cry>
Joey: I can't believe I won.
Monica about to have a heart attack: Okay, listen I know you're having a little bit of a family crisis, but you don't have to take it out on the plates. I mean, I mean in fact I think that everyone should cut their food like this.
Amy: Okay, how about this, you guys die and the crazy plate lady dies, then do I get the baby?
Chandler: No, if crazy plate lad.. <sees Monica frustrated at this comment> If Monica dies then I would get Emma, Right?
Chandler: Well what is wrong with me? Am I .. am I incomptent? Because I managed to survive whatever it is that killed the three of you!
Chandler: Look, I may not know a lot about babies, but do you really think I'm not capable?
Chandler: Ok. So if we both had Emma and I die <knocks on table> she'd have to give her up.
Joey: I lie better then that, right?
Chandler: So.. let me get this straight. So my two friends die, I get Emma. Then my wife dies, then Emma the one tiny ray of hope left in my life gets taken away from me?
Monica: Ross and Rachel don't know what they're talking about. I mean its not like their so responsible. Emma is a product of a bottle of Merlot and a five year old condom.
Chandler: Yeah but they're right. I mean, I'm not a strong father figure and I never will be.
Chandler: Yeah, but its not who I am. Everything they said was exaclty why I was worried about having a kid. And its true. And look everybody knows it.
Monica: I don't know it! I want to have a kid with you because I think you're going to be an amazing dad... at the fun parts and the hard parts.
Joey groans and gets off the phone: The producer from Days left a message on my machine asking why I wasn't at the parade. They said everybody's pissed off at me.. <whiny voice> And they all got to meet Santa!
Phoebe: It's ok. I thought of the perfect lie for you. It's easy to remember and doesn't invite a lot of questions. You weren't at the parade because you had a family emergency.
Joey: Oh, I like that, yeah. Wasn't at the parade because I had a family emergency.
Chandler: Oh no thats okay, you're totally right. I don't know anything about disciplining a child. But it did hurt my feelings and I want you to know that when I die, you don't get Joey.
Rachel: Yeah.. yeah right.. Remember in high school when I died and didn't give you my baby?
Amy: This might be my one chance to have a baby Rachel. I mean, you know that I have been so busy focusing on my carrer.
Rachel: Ok. You decorate dad's office and so now you're a decorator. Okay! I went to the zoo yesterday and now I'm a koala bear.
Rachel: Sup.. You want to talk supportive? You didn't even come and visit me when I was in the hospital having the baby.
Amy: Oh. Yeah. Well.. You didn't come see me when I was in the hospital when I was getting my lips done.
Rachel: I did the first time! Oh. Oh.. <gets up and walks into the kitchen> And you know what. You want to know why I'm not giving Emily to you.
Amy: Uh.. To name a few. You know.. You know.. You've just always been like this. You just have to have everything. And I couldn't have anything. Like in junior high, when you stole Timmy from me. I mean, do you even realize how much that hurt me?
Rachel: I cannot, I cannot believe that I invited you here today.
Amy: Yeah, well you know what I cannot believe. That my so-called sister, gets a 30% discount from Ralph Lauren and I still have to pay retail.
Rachel: Heey man, I work out.
Amy: So do I.
Rachel: I do pilates.
Amy: I do yoga.
Amy: Uh, yeah I think I did.
Chandler: Alright! That is it. This is our apartment and you can not behave this way. Now if you can't act your age then you shouldn't be here at all. Now those plates may not be as nice as the pretty pink ones I picked out, but they're very important to Monica. I want you to apologize to her right now.
Chandler: Okay. Thats better. Now I want you to both apologize to each other and mean it.
Ross: Dude. Well done. You know what? If I die, and Rachel dies and Monica dies then you can totally take care of Emma.
Ross: So, so now do I get Joey?
Monica: uh huh.. I mean these things happen. Its' just a plate. Its not like somebody died.
Monica: I don't care. <pauses and realizes...> Oh my god. I've lost the will to scold.
Rachel: Uh. No.. I was going to let you use my Ralph Lauren discount.
Chandler: Oh no no no.. I'll get her. I'm super-compentent and totally responsibile and fourth in line to raise Emma. I'll be right there Emma. Just let me get my trusty diaper bag here. <knocks over the box of china> Well.. what do you know? I guess, I'll be the one who dies first.
Chandler: Nope... (Monica walks in) Hey... so I'm gonna... put the plates back. You know, I think you were right, I don't think we should use these plates again for a looong time.
Joey: Hey! I did it. I called my producer. I told him I had a family emergency, he totally bought it. Thanks for teaching me how to lie Pheebs.
Richards Date: Well, I just wanted to see where you lived. Now, give me the tour.
Rachel: Well, I
Rachel: Well, well I can up with it!
Ross: Wow! It actually is in the handbook. I cant date you or have a hot plate in my office. I cant believe we have to stop seeing each other.
Emily: Ive uh, Ive come to talk to Ross.
Monica: I couldnt eat it! I had five friends who couldnt eat it, and one of them eats books.
CHANDLER: No actually, I was just going for colorful.
Emily: I was going to call him, but
Joey: Okay, I see what's going on here.
I made a man with eyes of coal And a smile so bewitchin', How was I supposed to know That my mom was dead in the kitchen? (shakes bell) La lalala la la la la lalala la la...
Emily: Ross, I love you!
Phoebe: I don't know about that. I've got one that's worse.
Joey: I think youre right.
Chandler: OH MY GAWD! I am so sorry sweetie, are you okay? You didnt tell her we were getting married, did you?
Janice: Oh, my Bing-a-ling. Ill wait for you. Do you even know how long youre going to be gone?
Phoebe: Oooh! I have something you can do! I have this new massage client... Steve? (pause) Anyway, he's opening up a restaurant and he's looking for a head chef.
Mr. Waltham: In a moment, please, Im in the middle of a task. And you have a customer.
Ross: See but, Pheebs that-that is the exact opposite intent of my music. Yknow my music is-is meant to inspire, and if it bothers you this much, then I I wont play anymore.
Ross: I cant believe no one believes me!
Susan: Oh yeah, Im so excited, Ive never been there.
Chandler: I dont care! (turns around and to the people watching them) I dont care!!
Joey: Alright, come on you guys, it's not that big a deal. Really... I mean, I just go down there every other day and... make my contribution to the project. Hey, hey, but at the end of two weeks, I get seven hundred dollars.
Joey: I knew I shouldnt have mentioned it! Thats what I wanted to name my kid!
Rachel: Oh, I beg to differ. The Pictionary incident?
Emily: Ross umm, theres something that Ive got to tell you, theres-theres someone else.
Rachel: What am I making him by the way?
Ross: Here they come, here they come. Oh-ho, if she kisses him goodnight, Im gonna kill myself, I swear. I cant, I cant watch this. (turns away, then quickly turns to look again) Come on, date over! Date over! Uh-oh, here we go, shes going in.
Monica: You know what? I don't care. I like it like this, and I'm gonna keep it. You're just jealous because your hair can't do this... (and she shakes her head more violently) OUCH!
Mike: Because I was told I'd get a free dinner, which I didn't. And that I'd meet a pretty girl. Which I did.
Joey: Absolutely! I could be a vegetarian. Theres no meat in beer, right?
Joey: No, but Im gonna!
Rachel: Well excuse me, my fashion-impaired friends, I am here to tell you that hats are back.
Phoebe: Yeah, I definitely. I dont like the name Ross.
Ross: (gasps) Hi... There she is. Hi Emma. Oh my God, I missed you. (kisses her) Oh Emma, I missed you so much. Hey... Did you have a good time with grandma Green? Huh? Did she give you a bottle of anti-depressants again to use as a rattle? (to Rachel)
Monica: Yknow, I think if I were going to be with a woman. (Chandler is intrigued.) Itd, itd be with someone like Michelle, she was so oh, she was so petite.
PHOEBE: Oh my God, oh my God, oh my God, oh my God. You are not gonna believe this. I have just been discovered.
Joey: There’s a part in a TV movie that I would be perfect for and I didn’t even be put up for it! She’d better have a good reason.
Joey: So I guess its Joey then!
JOEY: Great, well, I'm happy for ya. [picks up the orange juice carton and it's empty] Alright that's it. He just comes in here, Mr. Jonny Neweggs, with his, his, his movin' the mail and his, his 'see ya pals'. And now there's no juice. There's no juice f or the people who need the juice and want the juice. I need the juice.
Chandler: Wow, youre, youre right. I have a horrible, horrible name.
Rachel: Gee, I always heard them talk about that, I just always thought that it was a club they went to. Oh God, Im, Im sorry. (walks away)
JOEY: Yeah, but after Denise DeMarco, I had to promote it.
Rachel: Oh, ah nothin. I just felt like hangin out here and reading.
Rachel: Okay. So, can I serve you a little ofWhat? What? What? (She sees that Joshua isnt relaxed.)
Phoebe: (to her date) Okay, and then this is the coffee house. This is where I play my music. (points to the stage)
Joshua: Nothing I uh, its just that I know that theyre still out there.
Chandler: Yeah! It's a stupid job, and I could not stand leaving you. And why should I be the only one who doesn't get to do what he *really* wants to do?
Phoebe Sr.: Sorry. But just one last thing. Y'know you came looking for family. Im family, Im it. Now, now Im done. (starts to leave)
Elizabeth: Why dont you get in the hot tub and Ill meet you there.
Joey: (Laughs) Of course we do! Mike is playing a game that we used to play in high school. Yeah, where we pretend we don't know each other. We played all kinds of games. (To Mike) Hey, remember the one where I punch you in the face for not being cool?!
Ross: I know, but ahhhhhh!! I really wanna go up there and finish that kiss!
Ross: Am I?!
Ross: Am I?!
Monica: I just thought that if I could follow the wire I could find out what it did.
Kate: He happens to be brilliant. Which is more than I can say for that sweater youre dating.
Joey: Well, suppose until the babys born I laid off it. No extra animals would die, you-youd just be eating my animals.
Phoebe: You could get arrested, right now! (Flashes the badge and they glare at her.) All right, yeah, I gotta take it back. I'm totally drunk with power. (She heads for the door just as Joey enters.)
Joey: I know, it was amazing! I mean, we totally nailed it, it was beautiful.
Ross: Im just glad I brought that extra pair of socks, yknow? I used them as mittens, I didnt want to touch a thing in that last place.
Chandler: Youre coming on to the entire room! (He goes over to pick up a stack of magazines next to her, and to get her attention, he throws them back down.) Im Chandler.
Ross: Come on! The time we were all waiting in line for Dances With Wolves and that one guy cut in line in front of us and I just lost it?! Screamed at him! Turned all red! Red Ross!!
Mrs. Bing: Now Chandler dear, just because your father and I are getting a divorce it doesn't mean we don't love you. It just means he would rather sleep with the house-boy than me.
Rachel: Well, we were going to do that afterI mean umm, next.
Joey: Dude, I am sorry about what I said!
Chandler: I have no name.
Ross: Yeah. But, the good news is that Phoebe said that I could stay at her place for a while. So
Chandler: Yes it is! From now on, I have no first name.
Chandler: I hear ya. (Pause) But! Unfortunately, my company is transferring me overseas!
Chandler: Okay, so what name am I cool enough to pull off?
Cliff: Well uh if you must know Im a widower.
RACH: I can see that. I... just one phone call, I'll be very quick, I'll even pay for it myself. [man is still reluctant] OK, you're bein' a little weird about your phone.
PHOEBE: Eight dollars and 27 cents. But not really, 'cause I put in the first two, just to, you know, get the ball rolling, and to make myself feel better.
Chandler: Freedom! I want my freedom! Why wont you here me?! (Opens the door) Sophie, help me! Help me!! (Sophie stands up)
Rachel: Yeah hon, it cant hurt to put your name down! I mean in if two years if youre not engaged you just dont use it.
Joey: Because... look, no one wants this to happen more than me, ok? (in a trembling voice) I have gone over this moment in my head a hundred times and not once did I ever say no! (sighs) I couldn't do it to Ross!
Ross: Well, I still think I was right about that whole Mark thing.
Phoebe: But they shouldn't happen, you know what, you're, you're in a terrible, terrible business. Oh God, I don't wanna be the person who makes your face look like that.
PHOEBE: 'Cause my, my grandmother's never had chicken pox. Please, please tell me you have, 'cause oh my God, I forgot how cute you are.
Phoebe: I remember the day I got my first pay check. There was a cave in in one of the mines, and eight people were killed.
Ross: Oh, I missed you too.
Rachel: (stopping him) Hey-whoa-whoa-whoa!! Ho-ho-hold on a sec there, Mr. Kissey! Y'know, I've been meaning to talk to you about this whole, little, new European thing you got going on, and I just need to tell you that it makes me very uncomfortable and I justy'knowstop it!
Joey: Yknow Terry, I-I dont really need to do this. I got my own cable TV series, (Pause) with a robot.
Carol: I was gonna say
Emily: Oh, so did I.
Emily: Hey! I missed you.
Phoebe: I dont what your talking about. (Laughs nervously and continues to leaqve)
Joshua: Yeah! I mean youre-youre beautiful and smart and sophisticateda lot of this isnt based on tonight.
Monica: I'm going into business people. I'm sick and tired of being depressed about Richard. I needed a plan, a plan to get over my man. What's the opposite of man? Jam. (sees Joey trying some jam from the pot) Oh Joey don't! It's way to hot. (Joey realizes this and spits what he had in his mouth back into the pot.)
Rachel: Im sorry. Im so sorry.
Phoebe: Nothing, I just thought I'd stop by.. y'know, after the uh... that I.. y'know, so what are you doing here?
Rachel: Stop it! I will kill you. I hate the fact that my room is so small.
Ross: Uh, I dont know, whatever.
Ross: I cant, I cant even believe her! No, yknow what, I am, I am gonna go!
Monica: Hey, I have all the space I need. Just do what I did.
Emily: I wish I could.
Emily: I love both of you!
Ross: Yeah, I know, I uh, I tried them on.
Bonnie: Hi! My boss let me off early, so I took the train.
Monica: Well at least, Im going to mute it.
Phoebe: I just wish they'd realise they should be together.